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I Placed My Son for Adoption — It's OK if I Die Without Another Kid

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There’s nothing like having a baby you can’t keep to make you want another one.

Five-and-a-quarter years ago, I placed my spectacular son in an open adoption with a gay couple. It was by far the best decision in every way. It was best for him and best for me, and the two men currently raising him are absolutely the best family for the job. I’ve seen them an average of once a month, remaining a strong presence in my son’s life. My son is happy, sweet, polite, a dancer and a joker; already, he’s had access to so many incredible experiences that I could not have given him.

But the best decision of your life can also be the most painful decision of your life, and this one certainly was. When my son left the hospital without me, I literally folded in half, my torso suddenly powerless against gravity, wracked with a pain I hadn’t known I could feel.

More: I Don't Regret Placing My Son Up for Adoption

So naturally, after that experience, I decided I never wanted to be in that position again. I made a point of seeking out a higher-paying job, of putting money into savings, of getting myself into a position where if I got pregnant again, I’d have no financial problem raising that child.

This phase lasted for about two years. That's when I admitted I was miserable at my new lucrative executive assistant job — that there were better uses of my time and talents than managing a white guy’s calendar. I quit, ostensibly to focus on my writing, but still always with the idea that I was preparing for an eventual baby. "I need to start this process now," I thought, "so I can be making money at a job I love by the time I have another kid." I had a partner I was in love with and 10 years to go before my 40th birthday; everything was right on schedule.

Then, the 2016 presidential election happened. The next day was even worse than the day I said goodbye to my son for the first time; I just stayed in bed, furiously typing heartbroken missives on Facebook. I watched as basically everyone in the oil industry assumed cabinet positions. And I thought, "Welp, that’s it for planet Earth. Nice knowing you guys, but apparently we’re all going to die of flooding if we don’t die of nuclear war or The Handmaid’s Tale before then."

So, in response to Donald Trump’s presidency, I found myself very much on Team No More Babies. I thought about World War III; I thought about the escalating hate crimes; I thought about the swiftly dying planet. And then I thought about the idea of bringing a kid into that world. It seemed like a heartless thing to do. No, thank you. Nothing makes my uterus clamp shut like imminent apocalypse.

And now a year and change later? Well, now it’s more complicated.

More: My 5-Year-Old Is Moving Across the Country Without Me

See, my own logic kind of falls apart under scrutiny. I can claim that I don’t want to bring a child into this terrifying world, but that doesn’t change the fact that I have already done so. I’m already going to have to watch my son navigate our swiftly changing country. So really, how much of a difference does it actually make if I add one more kid to that?

And yet, I still find myself feeling 100 percent on board with the idea of never raising my own kid.

Maybe it’s that I know my son’s daddies will be the ones ushering him through the horror of the world. I’ll be around, sure, but I won’t be the one who's there day in, day out doing the heavy lifting and fumbling to answer questions that feel impossibly huge. Maybe I’m scared of being put on the spot like that by a child I’d be raising — on my own.

Or maybe there’s enough baby in my life already. Maybe I’m gratified enough through my relationship with my son that I no longer crave another kid. Maybe my intense desire to procreate again was just me wanting to settle a very painful score, and now that the pain has subsided, I feel like my current situation is enough. Maybe it’s that I’ve seen the glazed, exhausted look in his daddies’ eyes, in the eyes of his friends’ parents, and I’m fine with not experiencing it for myself.

More: 5 Ways to Make Sure Our Sons Don't Grow Up to Be Harvey Weinstein

Maybe it’s just that I love going to bed when I want, waking up when I want, going where I want, doing what I want and spending tons of time with my friends. Maybe I’m so obsessed with the beauty of chosen family that I don’t feel as drawn to creating more biological family. Maybe I’m just so relentlessly ambitious that I can’t stand the idea of anything slowing me down. Maybe I’m afraid of having less freedom.

Or maybe I’m going through a phase. Maybe I’ll wake up in a week or a year and decide I need a baby, right now. Anything is possible.

But right now? Right now, I feel utterly at peace with the idea of dying without having another kid. And right now, being true to that feeling is all I can do.


Kim Kardashian West Slams Shamers Who Accused Her of Partying When Saint Was in the Hospital

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Don’t come for Kim Kardashian West‘s parenting lest you want to be called out in front of her 58 million followers. On Wednesday, Kardashian West lashed out at mom-shamers who accused her of partying on New Year’s Eve while her 2-year-old son, Saint West, was sick with pneumonia at the hospital.

She promptly shut down the rumors and explained that she didn’t leave Saint’s side for a minute when he was in the hospital from Wednesday to Saturday of last week. When the doctor provided clearance and the family was able to return home on Saturday night, Kardashian West was able to celebrate New Year’s Eve in style on Sunday.

“I haven’t heard this BUT lets get this straight. I did not leave my son for one minute during his hospital stay. We were there Wednesday night to Saturday. NYE WAS SUNDAY NIGHT,” she tweeted. The mom of two also explained that she didn’t invite people over until after Saint fell asleep and warned people to stay away if they were going to talk smack about her mothering. “People came over when he was already asleep for the night! Don’t even try me when it comes to my kids,” she wrote.

Kim K parenting defense tweet 1

Kim K parenting defense tweet 1

Kim K parenting defense tweet 2

Kim K parenting defense tweet 2

More: 10 Ridiculous Reasons Kourtney and Kim Kardashian West Were Mommy-Shamed

Kardashian West’s tweet accompanied a tweet from a fan who brought it to her attention that there were people who suspected she was partying on New Year’s Eve while her son was in the hospital. On Tuesday, she revealed Saint was hospitalized for three days, during which time he was hooked up to IVs and oxygen machines after falling ill with pneumonia.

“We are so grateful for you all! He’s home and all better. He’s so resilient I’m sure he will still say the ambulance ride was cool! My strong Saint” she wrote on Instagram.

Kim K's IG Thank you message to Doctor's and Nurse

Kim K's IG Thank you message to Doctor's and Nurse

More: Khloé Kardashian Hits Back at Haters Who Shamed Her Baby Bump as "Too Small"

Given how many times Kardashian West has hit back at mom-shamers — from those who accused her of snorting cocaine when her children were present to those who questioned the outfits she puts her daughter in — you would think critics would know better than to talk shit. At least she was there to give them another reminder she is not to be messed with.

Originally posted on StyleCaster.

How to Find the Best Lingerie for Your Body Type

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Let’s face it — we have a love-hate relationship with lingerie. Once you find the piece of lingerie or bra that makes you feel invincible, life is good, if not great, but the whole shopping and trying pieces on parts are, well, less than favorable.

But we've created a guide to help you find lingerie that best suits your body shape, including a comprehensive bra-fitting guide from bra expert Kimmay Caldwell from Hurray Kimmay. Lingerie shopping can be stressful, so we’re here to take the guessing out and help you find the perfect pieces for your lingerie collection.

More: New "Feminist" Lingerie That's Not Supposed to Be Sexy

Kimmay has more than 12 years of bra-fitting and lingerie-industry experience, and her mission is to “guide women to feel great on inside, outside and underneath it all.” She told us her two main pieces of advice when shopping for lingerie are:

  1. Take a deep breath and know that the size on the tag does not define who you are. You are not those numbers, and don't be surprised if you end up wearing a size you never thought you would.
  2. Start with the basics. Whether you’re expanding or reinventing your lingerie collection, take baby steps. Start with pieces that are outside your typical everyday comfort zone — like a new color or lace bra — whatever feels special to you. Then start expanding by purchasing matching pieces like a garter belt or sleepwear. These little upgrades make it easier and easier to start incorporating lingerie into your life. Don't be afraid to take it slow and explore what feels good for you.

First things first: Bras

According to Kimmay, there are five main steps to fitting the perfect bra.

  1. Focus on the band: The band provides 90 percent of the bra’s support, so it should fit snugly and be parallel to the floor.
  2. Focus on the underwire: The underwire should fit completely around your bust and you should not feel any digging or slipping.
  3. Focus on the cups: Figure out your bust shape so you can find a cup that works best for your breasts. Is the cup gapping? Try a shallower cut or smaller cup. Are you spilling out? Try a fuller coverage style or larger cup.
  4. Focus on the straps: Your straps provide the last 10 percent of your bra’s support. Straps should reach 1 inch off your shoulder with a gentle tug. With the right bra fit, you can slip your straps off your shoulders and your bra should still fit your bust and stay put.
  5. Focus on the feel: Ultimately, how do you feel in the bra? A bra fitter can tell you how your bra fits, but only you know how you feel in it.

More: Neon Moon's New Lingerie Ad Celebrates Our "Flaws"

Let’s talk about lingerie

There really isn’t a do and don’t guide for lingerie. If you feel good in it, then rock it. But in case you’re not sure where to start or feeling like you need some ideas, we have listed out the best pieces to complement various body shapes.

Tall

It’s time to play up your long limbs — add garter belts, a corset, a teddy or a bustier. Since you have a longer torso or legs, you can wear lingerie pieces with a little more fabric without it seeming like “too much” coverage.

Kimmay’s bra tip: "​If your torso is long, make sure your bra straps can adjust to the length you need. A fully adjustable strap is best."

Athletic

Look for items to play up your sculpted body, such as cheeky or thong underwear, cutouts or sheer slips. Cutouts and push-up bras will also help create curves.

Kimmay’s bra tip: ​"Typically speaking — but not always — those who are very athletic tend to have less breast tissue since breasts are made mostly of fatty tissue. I highly suggest getting a few bras that play up your shape in different ways (think bralettes, bustiers, balconette bras)."

Petite

If you’re petite, two-pieces and sets typically work best for your small frame. Long slips, heavy fabrics and one-pieces sometimes don’t fit correctly. You can also rock a bralette and pieces with less underwire or support.

Kimmay’s bra tip: "​For those who are very short, strap length is a major issue. I highly suggest a bra that has fully adjustable straps so you can get the proper length. You can also have a seamster take out a few inches or use a handy accessory like a strap converter, or a Strap Saver."

More: Mastectomy Lingerie Designed by Cancer Survivor Is Beautiful

Curvy/plus size

Play up your curves. Look for plunging necklines to show off your chest or decorative underwear. If you’re looking for a little more coverage, baby doll dresses, rompers, corsets and waist cinchers are the perfect ways to add a little more fabric to the mix but still make you feel sexy. We also love the idea of looking for dresses or rompers with cutouts, sheer paneling and lace to spice things up.

Kimmay’s bra tip: ​​"The No. 1 tip for a any bra wearer, but especially a curvy woman, is to make sure you're wearing the right size.​ Remember that the bra alphabet goes far beyond DD, and getting a snug fit underneath the bust (where you may be very slim compared to your bust or hips) and a cup that fits your entire bust inside is key to feeling supported and comfortable (and looking your best!)"

Baby Boy Names With Serious Swagger — for Your Super-Cool Kid

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Sometimes, you have a kid, and it's like you just know from the moment you meet them they're going to be hella cool. Laid back, interesting, observant... You want them to walk in the world with confidence, and you want to give them a name that fits that personality.

Although we love classic baby boy names, we know some babies just demand a more unique twist. Luckily, there are plenty of names that rise to the occasion; we think your little man is going to rock them.

Underrated boy names

Can we give a shoutout to these super-underrated baby names? One of these cool-guy options may be just what you're looking for.

Tough-sounding boy names

We love these tough-guy names because they have a confident air to them, often thanks to the letters X or Z (think Axel or Zander). Skip too-obvious names like Hercules or King, however, which can seem like you're trying too hard to sound tough or strong. Rocco gets that done in spades and is much more subtle, no? Check out our picks below.

Next: Boy names with cool meanings

A version of this article was originally published in February 2016.

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Boy names with cool meanings

Some parents simply want a name with a great meaning. The names below have it all — depth, strength, valor, luck, bravery — and they just plain sound cool.

  • Bryant: Celtic name meaning “strong”
  • Chasin: Hebrew name meaning “strong”
  • Kemen: Spanish name meaning “strong”
  • Donovan: Celtic name meaning “strong fighter”
  • Griffin: Welsh name meaning “strong in faith”
  • Felix: Latin name meaning “lucky”
  • Faust: Italian name meaning “lucky”
  • Chance: English name meaning “good fortune”
  • Frederik: German name meaning “leader”
  • Brendan: Gaelic name meaning “brave”
  • Farrell: Celtic name meaning “brave”
  • Hardwin: English name meaning “brave friend”
  • Baldwyn: German name meaning “brave friend”
  • Sebastian: Greek name meaning "revered"
  • Dustin: English name meaning "valiant"
  • Neron: Spanish name meaning "strong"

Celebrity boy names

Celebrities always seem to have their fingers on the pulse of what's cool and unique — and names are no exception. Many recently born celebrity baby boys are sporting names with a cool combination of modern edge and classic, old-fashioned sound. For inspiration, check out the following.

  • Ace: Son of singer and actor Jessica Simpson
  • Cruz: Son of singer Victoria Beckham and athlete David Beckham
  • Magnus: Son of actor Elizabeth Banks
  • Saint: Son of Kim Kardashian West and Kanye West, also son of rocker Pete Wentz
  • Apollo: Son of singer Gwen Stefani
  • Milan: Son of singer Shakira and Gerard Pique
  • Mason: Son of Kourtney Kardashian
  • Axl: Son of Fergie and Josh Duhamel
  • Milo: Son of actor Alyssa Milano
  • Duke: Son of E! News host Giuliana Rancic
  • Camden: Son of actor Vanessa Lachey
  • Oliver: Son of actor Ginnifer Goodwin
  • Jaxon: Son of Laguna Beach alum Kristin Cavallari
  • Otis: Son of Olivia Wilde and Jason Sudeikis
  • Kase: Son of singer Jewel
  • Marcelo: Son of actor Ali Landry
  • Colt: Son of John Rich of the band Big & Rich
  • Xander: Son of actor January Jones
  • Arlo: Son of actor Toni Collette
  • Milo: Son of actor Alyssa Milano
  • Felix: Son of actor Elizabeth Banks
  • Max: Son of actor Cynthia Nixon
  • Leo: Son of actor Penélope Cruz
  • Flynn: Son of actor Orlando Bloom
Baby boy names with swagger
Image: Getty Images/Design: Becci Burkhart/SheKnows

Old-Fashioned Baby Names With Modern Appeal

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Modern baby names can lead to some very, shall we say, interesting choices. Sure, it's great to be edgy and push the envelope, but trends also tend to come and go — and baby names are no exception. Something that seems super-hip now can later become... the bad kind of standout. Sometimes, it's nice to just rely on the classics.

So we thumbed through the history books and gathered up names from the Victorian era to the Roaring '20s to the Rockin' '50s. Elegant and timeless, these are names you're not going to forget anytime soon.

More: Middle Names for Girls That Are the Perfect Complement to Her First

Victorian-chic baby names

According to the Social Security Administration, these were the most popular baby names of the 1880s.

Top baby boy names of the 1880s

  1. John
  2. William
  3. James
  4. George
  5. Charles
  6. Frank
  7. Joseph
  8. Henry
  9. Robert
  10. Thomas
  11. Edward
  12. Harry
  13. Walter
  14. Arthur
  15. Fred
  16. Albert
  17. Samuel
  18. Clarence
  19. Louis
  20. David

Top baby girl names of the 1880s

  1. Mary
  2. Anna
  3. Emma
  4. Elizabeth
  5. Margaret
  6. Minnie
  7. Ida
  8. Bertha
  9. Clara
  10. Alice
  11. Annie
  12. Florence
  13. Bessie
  14. Grace
  15. Ethel
  16. Sarah
  17. Ella
  18. Martha
  19. Nellie
  20. Mabel

More: Baby Names From the Roaring '20s

A version of this article was originally published in February 2016.

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Baby names of the Roaring '20s

1920s boy
Image: Dominik Pabis/Getty Images

They didn't call it the Roaring '20s for nothing. In the 1920s, speakeasies were hot, and flappers broke out of the conventional molds for women. The fashions were iconic (and many are still in fashion today — hi, bobbed hair!). And the names? Well, they were pretty and perfect. According to the SSA, these baby names were most popular in the 1920s.

More: These Strong Boy Names All Have Great Meanings He Can Be Proud Of

Top baby boy names of the 1920s

  1. Robert
  2. John
  3. James
  4. William
  5. Charles
  6. George
  7. Joseph
  8. Richard
  9. Edward
  10. Donald
  11. Thomas
  12. Frank
  13. Harold
  14. Paul
  15. Raymond
  16. Walter
  17. Jack
  18. Henry
  19. Kenneth
  20. Arthur

Top baby girl names of the 1920s

  1. Mary
  2. Dorothy
  3. Helen
  4. Betty
  5. Margaret
  6. Ruth
  7. Virginia
  8. Doris
  9. Mildred
  10. Frances
  11. Elizabeth
  12. Evelyn
  13. Anna
  14. Marie
  15. Alice
  16. Jean
  17. Shirley
  18. Barbara
  19. Irene
  20. Marjorie

Next: Baby boomer names

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World War II baby names from the 1940s

1940s child
Image: yaruta/Getty Images

With a war abroad for half the 1940s, times were tough and families were torn apart. But when soldiers returned from war, the "baby boom" began, with births skyrocketing. These were the most popular baby names in the 1940s according to the SSA.

Top baby boys names of the 1940s

  1. James
  2. Robert
  3. John
  4. William
  5. Richard
  6. David
  7. Charles
  8. Thomas
  9. Michael
  10. Ronald
  11. Larry
  12. Donald
  13. Joseph
  14. Gary
  15. George
  16. Kenneth
  17. Paul
  18. Edward
  19. Jerry
  20. Dennis

Top baby girls names of the 1940s

  1. Mary
  2. Linda
  3. Barbara
  4. Patricia
  5. Carol
  6. Sandra
  7. Nancy
  8. Sharon
  9. Judith
  10. Susan
  11. Betty
  12. Carolyn
  13. Margaret
  14. Shirley
  15. Judy
  16. Karen
  17. Donna
  18. Kathleen
  19. Joyce
  20. Dorothy

Next: Baby names from the 1950s

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Rockabilly baby names from the 1950s

1950s baby
Image: Andrew Rich/Getty Images

In the 1950s, everything started to change, including music. "Rockabilly" music was an early form of rock and roll, and its stars — such as Elvis Presley — led the pop music scene in a new direction. These were the hot names of the era according to the SSA.

Top baby boy names of the 1950s

  1. James
  2. Michael
  3. Robert
  4. John
  5. David
  6. William
  7. Richard
  8. Thomas
  9. Mark
  10. Charles
  11. Steven
  12. Gary
  13. Joseph
  14. Donald
  15. Ronald
  16. Kenneth
  17. Paul
  18. Larry
  19. Daniel
  20. Stephen

Top baby girl names of the 1950s

  1. Mary
  2. Linda
  3. Patricia
  4. Susan
  5. Deborah
  6. Barbara
  7. Debra
  8. Karen
  9. Nancy
  10. Donna
  11. Cynthia
  12. Sandra
  13. Pamela
  14. Sharon
  15. Kathleen
  16. Carol
  17. Diane
  18. Brenda
  19. Cheryl
  20. Janet
Old-fashioned baby names

Image: Getty Images/Design: Gabriela Arellano/SheKnows

Sterling K. Brown Just Gave This Is Us Fans Some Bad News About Randall & Kevin

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This Is Us has, in the course of its two seasons, given fans hints and glimpses into the terminally fractured relationship between Kevin and Randall Pearson. The show has made no secret of the fact that the boys have always been at odds with one another. Kevin has frequently directed his envy at Randall, who shares a very close bond with their mother and who often got softer treatment from their father while Kevin got Jack's tough love most of the time. Randall, as earnestly as he has attempted to live and love, seemed to have given up on trying to earn Kevin's love and approval, and instead, as an adult, couldn't really understand or relate to his ultra-famous brother.

More: There's a New This Is Us Spoiler, & It's Quite Unsettling

With Season 2 still on hiatus (until its return on Jan. 9), some of the latest tidbits and teases are rolling in from the This Is Us cast in regard to what exactly we can expect in the coming episodes. Viewers will likely have prepared themselves for lots of uncomfortable family conversations and reckonings with the truth. However, in the specific case of Randall and Kevin's relationship, it seems like Kevin's arrest for driving under the influence while his niece, Tess, was in the backseat will result in Randall and Kevin's recently mended relationship crumbling all over again.

Sterling K. Brown recently opened up to Entertainment Weekly to discuss just how bad things are about to get between Randall and Kevin. "I can tell you that is something that we address directly when we come back. It’s complicated because it has to do with the nature of why Kevin thinks he’s an addict, and it has to do with whether or not Randall validates his brother’s perspective," Brown revealed.

More: The West Wing Could Get a Revival & Take Sterling K. Brown Away From This Is Us

And it sounds like the reopening of old wounds between these constantly-at-odds brothers will cause each of the Pearson children to fundamentally reassess their lives and the memories they have of growing up with one another (heavy, heavy stuff, right?).

"When you think about the nature of memory, everyone tends to highlight those things that reaffirm their own perspective of truth," Brown elaborated to EW. "And Kevin, Kate, and Randall all have their own different versions of what their childhoods were that shaped who they are, and then they have very different ideas of how other people perceive themselves…. You see Randall working very hard to extend graciousness to his brother because his brother was present for him at one of the lowest points of his life, and now he wants to reciprocate that. But it’s hard to do that when you endanger somebody’s child."

More: This New Theory About Jack's Death on This Is Us Is Heartbreaking

We know things are about to get really hard for the Pearsons before they can get any better, but Brown's warning about Randall and Kevin might just be a knife in the heart of any viewer who was hoping these two men had put their differences behind them.

We Finally Know For Sure When Game of Thrones Is Coming Back

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Going an entire year without a single episode of Game of Thrones is hardly an ideal situation when you're a diehard GoT fan. However, if it's all in the name of waiting for an excellent final season to be whipped up, then sure, we'll cool our heels an extra 12 or so months while the GoT gods that be get something amazing on film. That said, we can officially confirm some details about GoT Season 8, explore what that means for the season ahead and also report on one severely disappointing fact the might dampen your spirits just a little bit.

More: Kit Harington Doesn't Want to Mess Up Game of Thrones Season 8

First, the good news: even though we've been saying it and thinking it for a while, Entertainment Weekly confirmed that GoT won't return until 2019. "Okay, big woop," you're likely telling your screen (and me) as you read this. "What's the real news then?" Well, we may have the confirmation of 2019 but we have no month and no exact day. Chances are good that the creative minds at GoT will keep us on tenterhooks about this but for now, it's just plain annoying.

Well, the 2019 return date is merely the tip of the iceberg here. Because when GoT does finally return in 2019, there will only be six — count 'em! — six episodes for the entire season. We'd heard rumors of the shortened season order and thus, we're planning for this but to hear that its six episodes and not seven (like Season 7) is a bit disappointing. Some fans may readily admit that watching seven episodes of GoT over the summer of 2017 felt all too short and risked the plot getting too scattershot at various points.

More: A Game of Thrones Actor Just Revealed an Interesting Season 8 Spoiler

Condensing the final season to six episodes means that we can, almost without question, expect longer (perhaps feature-length?) episodes. Hopefully, if GoT does decide to lengthen the run-time on each of the six episodes, they can quell viewers' fears that storylines won't get tied up properly or the final character arcs won't be fleshed out properly. But the pressure will certainly be on for GoT to deliver a tight, satisfying season that makes for a satisfying end all around. So yeah, let's hope they can stick the landing.

More: Emilia Clarke Gets Real About Her Feelings on the Game of Thrones Nudity

And, on a final note, Refinery29 reports that Season 8 will feature no (I repeat: zero) episodes directed by women. While GoT has only had four episodes written by women, only one out of the 19 directors to work on the show in its entirety was a woman: Michelle McLaren, who directed four episodes. Again, not exactly the best news in the world when we're talking about bringing fresh visions into the fold and perhaps even injecting some new life into the final season of GoT, which will be in dire need of something fresh since we have so many fan theories out there that one of them is bound to be right and we'll be out of surprises.

Are you ready for GoT to end? Or are you happy to wait until 2019 to get your hands of the final six episodes?

What Are Fistulas & How Are They Treated?

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A fistula is a connection between two adjacent organs that is not supposed to be there, and they can develop in a multitude of areas around the body. For women, though, it's the reproductive organs we're talking about, as fistulas can and do develop in between the vagina and its next-door neighbors — the bladder and rectum. Here's a quick rundown on this gynecological problem and what can be done about it.

Fistula 411

A fistula is an unnatural connection or conduit between two adjacent organs or parts of the body. They can develop between different organs, such as the neck and the throat, they can develop between an internal organ and the skin, such as bile ducts and the surface of the skin, and they can even develop between two blood vessels.

For our purposes, though, we're focusing on fistulas that affect women exclusively. Dr. Natalie Sohn, an OB-GYN on staff at Tenet Florida Physician Services and Good Samaritan Medical Center in West Palm Beach, Florida, says fistulas can develop between the various parts of the reproductive tract — such as in between the vagina and the bladder or the vagina and the rectum. This leads to uncontrollable leakage of either urine or feces down and out through the vagina, which, as you can imagine, is the opposite of A-OK.

These types of fistulas can occur after trauma or infection, and for many women around the world, they are the result of childbirth — prolonged or traumatic labor or delivery can leave a mom with this persistent medical problem. It's a particular issue in underdeveloped nations, Sohn notes. "In certain parts of Africa, fistulas are relatively common because of lack of medical care," she explains. Fistulas can lead to women who are shunned socially and/or are unable to work outside the home.

Fistula treatment

A fistula, however, is a medical problem that can be treated, and the solution is surgery — which doesn't seem to be a lot of fun, but it usually fixes the problem. "The tract or connective tubular areas need to be removed and the areas resewn," says Sohn. "Sometimes the organs need to be 'rested.' For example, the bowel may have to be temporarily shunted to a colostomy while the vagina heals."

This treatment can be a problem in areas where there isn't as much medical care to be had, however. Lack of access to medical care, improper treatment of obstetrical tears or lack of funds compound the problem, and women are forced to live with gynecologic fistulas. There are currently programs that are raising awareness of this condition and efforts being made to help fund surgery for those affected.

One such effort is being led by Icon Undies, which are specifically designed for incontinence. This underwear not only helps keep you dry from occasional leakage, but your purchases directly impact women in developing countries who live with an obstetric or gynecologic fistula.

Worse yet, fewer than 20,000 are treated for the condition each year, which means many women live with the social stigma and major discomfort of constant, uncontrollable leaking. To that end, Icon has partnered with the Fistula Foundation to help fund life-changing surgery for some of these women (in 2017, 157 women were helped directly due to Icon Undies' sales).

Fistulas are uncommon in developed countries due to medical advances, proper surgical techniques and adequate medical care, but they can still happen. Fortunately, treatment is available. For women who live in areas that may lack proper medical care, there is an ongoing effort to raise awareness and funds for diagnosis and treatment, so there is hope that someday, it will be less of a problem for women in developing countries.

What are fistulas and how are they treated?
Image: Getty Images/Design: Ashley Britton/SheKnows

I Hate Award Season — Here's Why

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Truthfully, working in entertainment news is hard when it comes to award season. This time of year, all anyone can talk about is nominations and snubs. Thoughtful commentary aside (like April Reign's #OscarsSoWhite), reading take after take on who should win and why makes my eyes glaze over after a certain point.

Award season is tough to get through as a consumer of media, but as a commentator? Forget it. This time of year, there's a whole new level of competitiveness in getting the best take before anyone else. The takedown posts are harsher and the fashion features longer. Although I'll call myself a hypocrite in a month when the dust has settled and I've written at least four pieces pertaining to award season, I hate it.

More: 18 Movies You Need to See Before Award Season

The glamour wore off for me in 2008, when Atonement lost Best Picture at the Academy Awards to No Country for Old Men and I had to listen to boys at my high school tell me how "romances aren't real films." OK. Tell that to Shakespeare in Love, I guess.

At any rate, I've tried to break down why I hate award season so much. The reasons may surprise you.

The media hits all the wrong points

Moonlight Wins Best Picture

Moonlight Wins Best Picture

Remember last year's Oscars, when Moonlight won Best Picture but Warren Beatty read La La Land off the card instead? Remember how shocked everyone was when the La La Land crew had to hand over their trophy?

There are flubs, and then there are flubs. Everyone spent so much time talking about how ridiculous this mistake was that no one touched on the important stuff, like how incredible it is that a gay black love story won against a straight white musical. Now the two films are forever linked because of "great live television," and that's so frustrating.

More: Why Our World Needed Moonlight so Much, as Explained by Director Barry Jenkins

Celebrities are applauded for doing the bare minimum

Meryl Streep - Golden Globes 2017

Meryl Streep - Golden Globes 2017

Meryl Streep gave an anti-Trump speech at 2017's Golden Globes that had everyone all aflutter. She was praised for her words even though she never said his name, and it was awesome. But political acts at major award shows often get lost, especially when a speech or a red carpet statement is the only engagement a celebrity has with a cause.

Yet we talk about these moments for months, as if they sparked major change. Why? Because they're more visible.

Earlier this month, People reported that several actresses will wear black at the Golden Globes to protest harassment in Hollywood. Recently, the magazine added that several actors will also wear black. Great! But as many commentators have already pointed out, red carpets are peppered with black every year. The average viewer who hasn't been following the #MeToo movement probably won't notice a difference at all.

More: Time's Person of the Year 2017 Honors the #MeToo Movement

Furthermore, despite the Academy booting Harvey Weinstein in the wake of numerous sexual harassment allegations leveled against him this fall, Casey Affleck is still presenting the Best Actor award at this year's ceremony regardless of several calls for him to be disinvited, given his own alleged history of assault.

If we want to applaud celebrities and award show producers for facilitating change, there needs to be more outcry when the bare minimum isn't enough.

We excuse the actions of terrible people because they entertain us

Melissa McCarthy Sean Spicer Cold Open

Melissa McCarthy Sean Spicer Cold Open

Look. Sean Spicer shouldn't have been at the Emmys. He shouldn't have been invited, let alone put on stage, then fawned over by celebrities. Jason Isaacs was the only person who seemed to get just how dangerous downplaying Spicer's role in the White House was.

During award season, you never know what may happen — and most of the time, the "surprises" are bad, bad, bad.

More: The 2018 SAG Awards Will Feature Only Women Presenters

Everyone has an opinion

Napoleon Dynamite - Fight
Image: Giphy

Commentators aside, award season draws out some nasty arguments. I don't go to Oscars parties, but I've heard stories. Twitter alone is a cesspool of arguments; getting involved beyond that just feels like a bad idea.

This year's award season looks marginally better than previous years... but I'm still not stoked about it.

So Much for Our New Year’s Resolutions — Romaine Lettuce Is Making People Sick

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Bad news for those of us trying to eat more salads in the new year: Looks like romaine lettuce is off limits.

Consumer Reports was called on by the CDC to ask people in the U.S. and Canada to stay away from romaine lettuce after an E. coli outbreak has made 58 people sick and also killed one person.

More: Warning: This Bacteria Could Be Hiding in Your Salad

“The Public Health Agency of Canada has identified romaine lettuce as the source of the outbreak in Canada,” the CDC said in its Dec. 28 statement.

“In the United States, state and local public health officials are interviewing sick people to determine what they ate in the week before their illness started. CDC is still collecting information to determine whether there is a food item in common among sick people, including leafy greens and romaine,” it added.

More: Cooking 101: Basic salad greens

While it’s not certain lettuce is the root, the truth of the matter is that cooking will generally kill bacteria, but we tend to eat lettuce uncooked, meaning if it is infected, we have no recourse.

“Even though we can’t say with 100 percent certainty that romaine lettuce is the cause of the E. coli outbreak in the U.S., a greater degree of caution is appropriate given that romaine lettuce is almost always consumed raw,” said Dr. James Rogers, food safety director at Consumer Reports.

Apparently, the available information strongly suggests lettuce is the cause of this outbreak, so if you do have some lettuce, probably this is a good excuse to toss it and eat a sandwich right around now.

Our Top Baby Name Predictions for 2018

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The new year is here, and you know what that means: a whole new year of beautiful and bizarre baby name trends. So we looked into our baby name crystal ball (OK, and asked a few friends and made a few wild guesses) to predict top trends for 2018. And we dug up quite a few name gems inspired by everything from pop culture to literature to social consciousness.

More: Game of Thrones Baby Names True Fans Need to Add to Their Lists

Names on the rise

First, the up-and-comers. When popular baby name website Nameberry recently released their hottest names of 2017, we saw some game-changers on the rise. The monikers below aren’t the actual most-used names from last year, but they were the most-viewed on the Nameberry site. That interest indicates they're likely to become more and more popular in 2018. If you’re expecting, this is definitely a list to watch.

Here are the 2017 names that rose the highest up the list.

Boys:

Girls:

Names.org predicts that most of the top 10 boy names and top 10 girl names of 2018 will also be among the top 25 baby names of 2016. But there could be some wild cards: The website predicts that certain trending names of 2017 (not necessarily the most popular ones) will continue to soar into 2018. Those names include: Adeline, Bryson, Luna, Mateo, Kinsley, and Greyson.

Trending themes

In addition to the fastest-rising names list, Nameberry has a few future predictions of its own. We spoke to the site's baby name expert, Pamela Redmond Satran, about name trends coming up for 2018. One notable trend was bucking gender norms "with girls' names getting stronger and boys' names getting more stylish,” Redmond Satran explains. She adds that the increased visibility of strength in women "reflects what we saw in society this year, with the Women's March, Wonder Woman and the #MeToo movement.” Eleanor, Freya and Arya are among Redmond Satran’s predictions in terms of bold names for girls who don't tolerate bullshit (we're sure Game of Thrones nudged some of these names on too). For girls, she also thinks "serious" names such as Ruth and Louise will be big too. Do we have Ruth Bader Ginsburg to thank for this one?

But there are more hot names for 2018. “Saoirse is rising for girls, as is the Shakespearean Ophelia, taking the place of the very popular Olivia,” Redmond Satran tells us. (We imagine those names may have also been given a boost by actor Saoirse Ronan and The Lumineers’ song Ophelia.)

More:  Khloé Kardashian's Baby Boy Name Is Shockingly Traditional

In the boys’ camp, more fashion-forward names will gain popularity. “We are seeing boys' names now as [just as] fashion-driven and subject to popularity fluctuations as girls' names,” Redmond Satran tells us. For instance, parents are opting for Milo instead of Michael and Jasper instead of John. Trendy names like Atticus (this year's No. 1!) will continue to gain traction. And in addition to Atticus, Redmond Satran predicts other ancient Roman names for boys — such as Cassius and Ozias — will be on the rise as well.

And speaking of ancient Roman politics, American political/presidential names are likely to remain on trend (Donald, however, is not trending). The dignified Theodore, Lincoln and Franklin are doing well, and we think Alexander and Hamilton will both get a boost thanks to musical theater fans.

As for phonetic trends, the letter S (at the beginning or end) will be big for boy and girl names, predicts Redmond Satran: Story, Stellan and Saskia are rising, as are Iris, Augustus, Frances and Lazarus.

Names from pop culture

Celebrities have always inspired name trends, and Megan/Meghan is a likely 2018 winner thanks to soon-to-be royal Meghan Markle (or, you know, maybe that name is just too tied to the '80s to be revived just yet). Other British royals may see their monikers rise up the charts too. Classics Alice and Albert are already climbing, notes BabyCentre U.K. And according to Vogue, Brits are betting on Alice or Arthur for William and Kate’s next babe.

MTV’s reality franchise Teen Mom often inspires name trends (yes, we were surprised to learn this too), with star Maci Bookout’s choice, Bentley, rising up the charts. Her Bentley is now 9, but Bookout has a baby boy named Maverick, and fan favorite Chelsea DeBoer named her little guy Winston. Both boy names seem bound for more popularity. Then there’s little Novalee (Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra’s daughter) as well as Nova (Briana DeJesus’ daughter) on the show; the name Nova made waves in 2017 and will likely shoot up the charts this year.

And speaking of reality TV, MTV alums Lauren Conrad, Heidi Montag and Whitney Port all welcomed baby boys in 2017, but we think only one of them will spark a name trend: Whitney’s little Sonny. Oh, and then there's the upcoming Kardashian/Jenner baby boom, sure to inspire names for plenty of 2018 bundles of joy. What will Khloé Kardashian, Kim Kardashian West and Kylie Jenner name their tiny trendsetters? If Khloé Kardashian's recent news is any indication, bold choices like Reign and Saint may be falling by the wayside in favor of more traditional trends.

Elsewhere in Hollywood, Jessica Alba kicked off the new year by giving birth to son Hayes — sounds like a name winner to us. Meanwhile, Jackass alum Bam Margera welcomed baby boy Phoenix, which is already a hot name in Los Angeles; we can see this one going nationwide. Same goes for Lazlo, which actor Jason Biggs and his wife chose for their second son. And of course the Beyhive may start using Beyoncé’s baby girl’s name, Rumi, after the poet. (Somehow, we don't see her son’s name, Sir, spreading quite the same.) Another on trend pick? WWE stars Brie Bella and Daniel Bryan’s baby girl’s name, Birdie.

More: The Most Popular Baby Names of 2017 Will Surprise You

Whether inspired by modern celebs or ancient Rome, it seems the names of 2018 babies will be bold, strong and pretty badass. And after the train wreck that was 2017, that sounds just right. Let’s get some more powerful little Ruths, Phoenixes, Novas, Atticuses and Hamiltons out there, "thinkin' past tomorrow" and changin' the world for the better.

Baby name predictions for 2018

Image: Design: Ashley Britton/SheKnows

How to Do Whole30 Without Sacrificing a Whole Month

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Most of us would love to eat a little bit healthier, but in a culture where every food group seems to have negative studies coming out against it, it can be hard to know which habits to start with. Perhaps that's why the Whole30 diet is so popular: It offers a framework of diet changes and also a timeline in which to accomplish them.

Still, dedicating a whole month to what some consider an extreme diet overhaul can be daunting. That's why we've boiled down the program to its most essential ingredients so you can work on adopting them over whatever period of time best suits you.

1. Start by phasing out the sugar

This one is easier than it sounds, if you can commit to making the first big change. For me, finally kicking sugar in the ass made the hugest difference in how I felt — and how my pants fit. If you do one “whole” thing in the next 30 days, take wellness coach, fitness instructor and health blogger Kristian Henderson's advice: Put extra thought into how much sugar you eat and the many different ways it can sneak into your diet. She says, “You expect sugar in sweets — pies, cakes, brownies, cookies, donuts, etc. — but sugar is also found in most processed food, flavored yogurts, breads and even frozen fruit. And a lot of times, you may not even realize it is sugar. You have to educate yourself on the 56+ names of sugar — here is a partial list: brown sugar, cane crystals, cane sugar, corn sweetener, corn syrup, crystal dextrose, evaporated cane juice, fructose sweetener, fruit juice concentrates, high-fructose corn syrup, honey, liquid fructose, malt syrup, maple syrup, molasses, pancake syrup, raw sugar and syrup.”

More: 4 Totally Realistic Things You Can Do Today to Start Improving Your Health

2. Then, get rid of the processed foods on your grocery list

If you’ve mastered no-sugar level one and are ready for the next challenge, slash all processed foods from your grocery list. “Cut out processed carbohydrates, even if you aren't going to cut out all grains or even gluten,” says Liz Barnet, a New York City fitness and food coach. “That means no pasta, pizza, cookies, cakes, crackers, cereal, chips; these foods are generally deficient in nutrients, unless they are artificially added. Only eat grains and carbohydrates that require simple, straightforward cooking, generally boiling. Think rice, quinoa, buckwheat, or even farro or wheat berries and barley (which do include gluten). These types of grains contain fiber and protein, which increase satiety and slow digestion, so you'll stay full and satisfied longer.” (Note that in the official Whole 30 diet, grains are cut out completely).

3. Focus on the clean foods you like, not the ones you miss

The Whole30 may seem like a long list of restrictions when first starting out, but that’s where your inner Pollyanna can come in handy. Look on the bright side, and you’ll see that there are plenty of delicious and nutritious whole foods that you can pile on your plate. Barnet recommends “lots of vegetables, some seasonal fruits, smart starches and carbs like sweet potatoes or butternut squash, lean meats and healthy fats like avocado, coconut oils and some nuts and seeds.” She continues, “By basing the majority of your diet on these nutrient-dense foods, you will essentially ‘crowd out’ not-so-nutritious foods.”

More: Eating This Amount of Cheese Is Good for Your Heart

4. Read ingredients, not labels

As Henderson explains, it’s easy to get stuck in a clean eating rut, where you focus on flashy nutrition labels while overlooking ingredients. Help yourself to course correct by avoiding enticing “low-carb” and “low-fat” foods that claim to be healthy and skim the actual ingredient list instead. “You might love your trail mix, and it might be low in calories and carbs, but if the ingredient list is long and if it has words you can’t pronounce, you should pass. Remember, the essence of clean eating is eating food in its most natural state,” Henderson says.

5. Simplify when eating out

Unless you’re hitting up the trendiest vegan restaurant in town, it’s going to be hard to order a “whole” meal when dining out since you can’t guarantee how the food was prepared. Henderson recommends keeping it simple to keep your priorities straight when you grab a bite with friends. “For starters, avoid fast food,” she says. “It is nearly impossible to get clean food from a fast-food restaurant. Second, try to find farm-to-table restaurants or restaurants that pride themselves in offering organic or locally sourced produce. This increases your chances of getting clean food. If all else fails, just get grilled chicken or fish with a side of vegetables and brown rice. Keep it simple.”

6. Eat small salads throughout the day

If you’re not used to this squeaky clean living, it can be hard to stay motivated to pile veggies on your plate meal after meal. Instead, Dawn Viola, holistic nutrition educator and executive chef at This Honest Food, recommends breaking it down into bite-size chunks that make the Whole30 approach easier to swallow. “Salads can be a great way to eat a wide variety of vegetables during the day, but sometimes a giant salad can feel overwhelming (who wants to eat that much lettuce?). Instead, have a small salad with nutrient-dense foods. One half cup of broccoli sprouts or one cup of kale or cress micro-greens offer more nutrition per cup than their fully grown versions. Add a tablespoon of sesame seeds or sprouted sunflower seeds, some shredded raw beets, a little goat cheese, and you've got an easy (small) salad with big benefits,” Viola explains.

More: These Foods May Help Decrease Side Effects of Breast Cancer Treatment

7. Finally, give yourself some credit

There’s an old adage that says the easiest way to swallow an elephant is one bite at a time, and the same might be true for all that fresh produce in your fridge. As Viola points out, every change makes a big difference, no matter how big or small it seems to you. “Every change moves you a step closer to your goals,” she says. “Keeping that in mind can keep you feeling in control and not so overwhelmed at the thought of everything involved with changing eating and lifestyle habits.”

When you inevitably slip up on your Whole30-inspired journey, make like Taylor Swift and shake it off. And remember Viola’s wisdom and take it one step at a time. “For example, commit to eliminating a minimum of one processed food from your grocery cart every week and replace with the real thing. So if you're an applesauce freak, buy real apples; if you're hooked on a commercial-brand moisturizer, buy a jar of coconut oil and slather it on when your skin is still wet after a shower (nope, you won't smell like coconut for long).” Viola adds, “Don't be so hard on yourself, because you're awesome, and you can do this!”

A version of this article was originally published in February 2016.

Chip & Joanna Gaines Slammed for Having a 5th Kid

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Updated Jan. 5, 2018, 8:00 a.m. PT: All is not well in Fixer Upper fan-land. Us Weekly reports that since announcing Joanna Gaines' pregnancy this week, Gaines and her husband Chip have been fielding flak from all sides: Fans and critics alike seem to feel that five kids is simply... too many kids.

“I like them ok but enough with the kids already," wrote one commenter on Facebook. "Their own children begged them not to have any more children on a previous episode already..."

“Thank you for contributing to the over population of the planet," wrote another. "I hope this one will be your last and you will use wiser judgement.”

"The ‘We’re back together sex kid’ never fixes a marriage," chimed in another. Wait, were Chip and Jo broken up recently? No? Yeah we didn't think so either. But pay that no mind, trolls: "Just means one more kid, the marriage is still broken, and now the kid has to do pay [sic] for broken marriage sex." Ouch.

Allow us to remind ye trolls: A woman's reproductive choices are her own. Jo is allowed to do whatever she wants with that uterus of hers. Can we go back to complaining about the end of Fixer Upper now?

Original story, published Jan. 3, 2018: Chip and Joanna Gaines' family is about to get a little bigger. The Fixer Upper stars shared the exciting news in an adorable Instagram post on Tuesday night. Chip donned a fake baby bump for the occasion and posted a photo of himself (looking somewhat perplexed) as he and Joanna each placed a hand on his stomach.

"Gaines party of 7.. (If you’re still confused.. WE ARE PREGNANT)," Chip captioned the post. We weren't confused (also, you're not pregnant, Chip), but still, awww.

Meanwhile, Joanna's actual baby bump is visible underneath her gray hoodie in the photo. She posted an ultrasound video to Instagram on Wednesday morning along with the teaser that Chip "swears he can already tell it’s a boy."

More: Chip & Joanna Gaines Almost Broke Up Over a Faulty Business Plan

Chip Gaines Pregnancy Announcement

Chip Gaines Pregnancy Announcement

Joanna Gaines Instagram Pregnancy Announcement

Joanna Gaines Instagram Pregnancy Announcement

Baby Gaines will have two older brothers, Drake and Duke, and two big sisters, Ella and Emmie Kay. The couple's children range in age from 7 to 12. And based on what Joanna shared in a June interview with People, the kids will be over the moon about the newest addition to the family. “I would love another baby — or twins!” Joanna told the outlet. “The kids are always asking me, ‘Mom, can you have another baby?'"

She also shared that Emmie Kay, the youngest of the brood at age 7, was initially on the fence about a new sibling — a totally understandable stance since being the baby of the family often has some serious perks. But when Emmie changed her tune, Joanna saw it as a sign that the time had come for a new addition to the family.

More: Chip & Joanna Gaines Respond to Pregnancy Rumors

This isn't the only major life change that's afoot for the Gaines family. In September, Chip and Joanna announced that the fifth season of Fixer Upper, which is currently airing on HGTV, will be its last. "Chip and Jo’s decision to leave Fixer Upper is truly just based on wanting to catch their breath for a minute; to rest, refresh, and spend even more time with their family and growing businesses," the couple's rep said at the time.

Although we'll certainly miss Chip and Joanna on Fixer Upper, their decision to leave the show to devote more time to their ever-growing family certainly makes a whole lot of sense. Let the Baby Gaines name hypotheses begin!

Prince Harry & Meghan Markle's Wedding Will Have Some American Touches

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The next royal wedding was only just announced, and yet, it's right around the corner. Before we know it, May will be here, and Prince Harry and Meghan Markle will be exchanging their vows. With only five months to go before the big day, obviously we're hungrily searching the internet for all the information we can find about the upcoming ceremony.

More: Meghan Markle's New Year's Resolutions Are Inspiring

Some of the latest news to hit the 'net is that both Markle and Harry are starting to assemble their wedding parties. A source told Us Weekly that Markle is sticking to some American traditions, despite the very British wedding that's being planned, and that means she's chosen a maid of honor, rather than a chief bridesmaid.

"While it is very much a British wedding, expect a few American touches too," the insider said. There's still no confirmation about exactly who her maid of honor is going to be, but there are definitely some predictions out there: Markle's best friend and stylist Jessica Mulroney, fellow actress Priyanka Chopra and Suits co-star Sarah Rafferty would all be unsurprising picks.

More: Meghan Markle's Engagement Ring Will Pay Homage to Princess Diana

Harry, on the other hand, has a pretty easy choice for his best man.

"Harry has several close guy friends, but there's no way he would ask anyone but William to take on the top job," a source told Us Weekly last month. That one was a no-brainer.

More: A Definitive Timeline of Meghan Markle & Prince Harry’s Relationship in 2017

While the Royal Family is hard at work preparing for the wedding, all of Britain is preparing for the huge influx of tourism that will likely come with it. When Prince William and Kate Middleton tied the knot in 2011, 350,000 tourists came to the UK for the big day. Britain's Office of National Statistics is already expecting similar crowds around Harry and Markle's May 18 wedding date, as well as a $680 million boost to the UK's economy because of the wedding. Two beautiful lovebirds tying the knot and single-handedly boosting their country's economy? What a win-win.

Alex Trebek is Taking a Break From Jeopardy — for a Scary Reason

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After spending decades hosting a show requiring people to use their brains, Jeopardy host Alex Trebek is recovering from issues with his own. He is currently taking medical leave from the long-running game show to recover from surgery he had in mid-December to remove blood clots from his brain.

Back in October, Trebek took a hard fall, hitting his head. This resulted in subdural hematoma, which caused the blood clots. He was diagnosed with the condition in mid-December, and had surgery to treat it the next day.

"After two days in the hospital, I came home to start recovery," Trebek said in a video posted to the show's website. "The prognosis is excellent, and I expect to be back in the studio taping more Jeopardy programs very, very soon!"

More: 6 Tips for Women's Brain Health

Even though he's taking a break from his hosting duties, don't expect to see much of a change in the Jeopardy TV schedule. Because episodes are taped months ahead of their airdate, the broadcast schedule should not be affected with the exception of the College Championship, which will now air in April.

What is subdural hematoma?

A hematoma is the swelling of clotted blood within the tissues caused by an injury to the wall of a blood vessel, which prompts blood to seep out into the surrounding area. On some parts of the body, they are visible, like a purplish bruise or a lump. But on other parts — like the brain — there's no physical evidence of the blood clots.

More: Can You Really Tell if Someone "Looks Sick"?

A subdural hematoma — like Trebek's — happens when a vein ruptures between the skull and the brain’s surface and can either be acute (caused by a head injury) or chronic. And they are serious: Only 20 to 30 percent of people with acute subdural hematomas will regain full or partial brain function, and between 50 and 90 percent of those with the condition die from it, making them the most lethal of all head injuries.

Trebek appears to be one of the lucky ones, and we wish him a healthy new year and speedy recovery and hope he'll be able to resume his Jeopardy hosting duties soon.


Here's How the Women of 'Time's Up' Plan to Make a Statement at the Golden Globes

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It's no secret that women (and men) are intending to use the Golden Globes this Sunday to make a huge statement about the culture of sexual abuse and harassment that has been rampant in Hollywood for so many years. In 2017, we saw many of the industries biggest names either come forward to share stories of being harassed, or taken down by floods of accusations about their behavior.

More: Laura Dern & Reese Witherspoon Prove They're as Close as Ever & Not Feuding

Many of those attending the Golden Globes have been planning for weeks to wear black to the show in solidarity with those who have been victims of sexual assault and harassment. But since a large group of A-listers, including Shonda Rhimes, Reese Witherspoon, Eva Longoria, Kerry Washington, Jennifer Aniston, Meryl Streep, Natalie Portman, Emma Stone and Rashida Jones, launched the #TIMESUP movement in the New York Times, there are even more actions being planned.

According to People magazine, Witherspoon worked with a stylist and costume designer to create a "Time's Up" pin that many will be wearing on the red carpet and to the show. The site reports that more than 500 of the pins have been created so far.

More: Reese Witherspoon Shaded ‘Mommy Blogs’ & Got This Response

Time's Up pin designed to be worn at the Golden Globes

Time's Up pin designed to be worn at the Golden Globes

In addition to rocking their pins, Witherspoon and Longoria plan to walk the red carpet together to support the movement.

More: Is There Any Bad Blood Between Gwyneth Paltrow & Reese Witherspoon?

"This is a moment of solidarity, not a fashion moment," Longoria told the New York Times. "For years, we've sold these awards shows as women, with our gowns and colors and our beautiful faces and our glamour. This time the industry can't expect us to go up and twirl around. That's not what this moment is about."

Am I the Only One Who Found Big Little Lies Boring & Weird?

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Before getting into any conversation about all the ways Big Little Lies was a big, big disappointment, I want to be crystal clear that I appreciate the show’s handling of the topic of domestic abuse. If for nothing more than that raw, precise storyline, the show deserves applause and recognition.

That being said, Lies continues its charge through award season this month with six Golden Globe nominations and four from the Screen Actors Guild. That follows eight Emmy wins (including the creative arts awards) last fall out of 14 nominations. And I just don’t get it. I mean, I understand the high-wattage star power going on here, but (I think) it’s not enough reason to hand out statues. Let’s chat about it. Here are my complaints.

It has no discernable plot

Much has been written about the promising start to this series. It’s a murder mystery! But that pretense, played out in brief scenes of a detective speaking at a press conference, was all but dropped by the second episode. To remind us we were supposed to be waiting expectantly for the big reveal, we received jarring cuts to what we’re supposed to understand are police interviews of people in the community. And every one of those interviews told us these women were bad, haughty, odd people and any of them might be the killer.

More: Answers to all your Big Little Lies questions

The storyline of an investigation drawing ever closer to one of the characters we’ve come to know and who might be hiding a secret would have made for compelling TV. But I never even remembered it was happening until those bizarre close-up interview segments would interrupt an episode.

Instead, we have a series of women doing… things. Nothing super-important, really, aside from trying to stop a bully at school. They’re trying to put on a play. Now they’re Googling names (spoiler alert) to try to find Jane’s rapist. Now they’re having breakfast with their kids. None of these actions, except maybe Celeste trying to come to grips with leaving her marriage, are compelling enough to warrant a full season of a TV series. The writers needed to remind us in a more interesting way there were life and death stakes. And also give us a soundtrack. All those long, silent shots weren't moody, they were creepy.

Its characters are unrelatable

Kudos to Reese Witherspoon and Nicole Kidman in their roles as producers for wanting to bring meaty roles for women to the screen. They chose great actors, and it’s not their fault the characters evolved the way they did. But perhaps the characters worked better on the pages of the novel that inspired the series.

First of all, I don’t know any moms, especially of small children, who get up every day and put on full makeup and dresses. I’m sure you’re out there, and props to you for your energy, but for most women, nope. It’s jeans or yoga pants for comfortable, moveable practicality. That makes Shailene Woodley’s Jane, the working-class mom struggling to find her place, the most accessible character of the bunch.

More: Having Big Little Lies withdrawal? Get Your Fix With These 10 Books

But Zoë Kravitz’s Zen yoga guru, Reese Witherspoon’s mothering fireball and Laura Dern’s angry executive are all inaccessibly perfect. They’re beautiful, wealthy, successful and passionate about doing the right thing. And setting aside the abuse angle of Nicole Kidman’s character, how can we identify with someone while also coveting their house?

Getting serious for a minute, though, if you do relate to Celeste’s abuse story, please take one step today and contact the National Domestic Abuse Hotline at 1−800−799−7233. It’s safe and confidential and there’s a whole world of people ready to help.

It’s all talk

As a woman, I can handle a lot of talk, but BLL is literally all talk. We’re talking at the coffee shop; we’re talking in the kitchen; we’re talking outside the school; we’re even talking during yoga, Madeline. Isn’t there some kind of screenwriting rule that for every page of dialogue you need a page of action? The only action that broke up the chatfest was the disturbing sex life of Celeste and Perry, which, by the way, was confusing since she never claimed their chemistry was a reason she wanted to stay, so why make that so prevalent?

More: Is Big Little Lies Season 2 Actually a Good Idea?

Aside from Madeline’s occasional jokes that lightened the mood, most of the talk and the long stretches of gazing out windows at the ocean were pretty weighty. And if you’ve read my opinion on This is Us, you know how I feel about shows that lack levity: They’re snoozefests.

I get that dramas are generally talk-heavy and that convention can produce some really great results. But in this case, it might have worked better as a two-hour movie than a seven-episode series.

Clearly, the powers that be disagree with me, because in a move that really angered the people who run the award shows, they’ve announced Big Little Lies will be returning for a second season. Presumably, we’ll follow the fallout of the investigation into Perry’s death and Celeste’s new life as a widow. But will she be able to stop her bullying son? Will Madeline and Nathan ever successfully co-parent? Will Adam Scott’s intense Ed reveal secrets of his own? HBO's tease is that Season 2 will "explore the malignancy of lies, the durability of friendships, the fragility of marriage and, of course, the vicious ferocity of sound parenting... relationships will fray, loyalties will erode [and] the potential for emotional and bodily injury shall loom." Here's hoping for all that and more.

BFFs Emma Stone & Jennifer Lawrence Have One Weird Thing in Common

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Jennifer Lawrence and Emma Stone make one adorable pair of best friends. But have you ever wondered how they became besties? It turns out they have one really creepy thing in common: They both had the same stalker. OK, he wasn't actually a stalker. He was just John the Orchestra Guy. Just know that this is one seriously atypical way to connect with a future friend.

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In their cover story for W magazine, Lawrence and Stone told the story of how their friendship began, and how it all started with John the Orchestra Guy.

"Jennifer Lawrence and I both had the same stalker, John the Orchestra Guy," Stone said. "He would text us both and say things like 'I'm running late on my way to the soundstage. Can you warm up the orchestra for me? Text me back and let me know you got this.' He wasn't really a stalker. He must have worked at a studio or something, because he had a lot of people's numbers."

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Still, a little weird this random guy was texting A-listers and asking them to do his job on the soundstage. But still, if it gave Lawrence and Stone something to bond over, maybe it wasn't all bad.

"Jen and I texted for a year before we actually met," Stone continued, sharing the actual story of the start of their friendship. "As she was driving to my house, she thought, 'Oh, my God, what if it's John the Orchestra Guy?' And I thought, 'Oh, my God, what if it's John the Orchestra Guy?' So Jen calls me and says, 'I just want to make sure you're not John the Orchestra Guy.' I wasn't. And we met. It's our adorable love story."

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From that unlikely beginning, a perfect BFF-ship. Too cute.

Could Ivanka Trump Be Considering a Bid for the Presidency?

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For the first week of January 2018, the whole internet has been buzzing over journalist Michael Wolff's upcoming book Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House. From what Wolff claims, he was given unprecedented access to the West Wing during the Trump administration's first year, and when a number of excerpts from the book, due out next week, were released in various publications, there were more revelations about the current president than anyone could absorb without a few days to work through them all.

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And so, we've all been reading those excerpts pretty obsessively and trying to absorb as much of this new information as possible, because holy smokes, all of this new information is next-level bananas. However, there's one little piece of information that really stands out, and it has to do with Ivanka Trump's ultimate career goal.

In the book, Wolff claims that Ivanka and her husband, Jared Kushner, have actually discussed and decided amongst themselves that if they get the chance, Ivanka will be the one to run for president.

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"Between themselves, the two had made an earnest deal: If sometime in the future the opportunity arose, she’d be the one to run for president," Wolff wrote. "The first woman president, Ivanka entertained, would not be Hillary Clinton; it would be Ivanka Trump."

Unfortunately for Ivanka, the book also implies that she already has enemies in Washington, namely Steve Bannon, who is depicted in the book as being one of the few and vocal against any of Ivanka's dreams for ascending to a higher political office. He is reportedly quoted in the book as having said, when he heard about her plan to run for president, "Stop. Oh, come on. They didn’t actually say that? Please don’t tell me that. Oh my God."

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Needless to say, the book is pretty inflammatory and is sufficiently up-ending the White House with all of the revelations it contains within its pages. How much of it is true still remains to be seen, but it's going to be a must-read if you want to join in on the talk around the water cooler in the near future.

Tips From a Sex Magic Practitioner

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Though some would argue all sex is magic, "sex magic" itself is a different concept entirely. Sex magic — also sometimes spelled "sex magick" — summons energy locked inside the body and uses orgasm as a vehicle to manifest. With orgasmic vibrations, spells intensify. And whether climax is reached with another body or alone, sex magic is one of the most effective ways to acquire desire. It is harnessing dreams into waking life.

The power sourced from sex magic doesn’t compare to any other magic on the market. Being a sex magic practitioner entails a few sly moves — mostly out-of-body experiences and mental states. In my experience, sex magic doesn’t just entail opening legs, but opening portals. What might surprise you most of all is realizing you’ve already been engaging in sex magic.

Writing is essential

The best way to start sex magic is through writing. It’s helpful to transmute — or change the nature of something as if through alchemical means — which allows thoughts to form into the tangible realm. If you write in a diary, create dream boards or make collages, this will sound familiar to you. Rather than confessions or secrets, let your journal be a platform for manifesting. Fill it with dream diagrams, animate it with goal-setting glorification.

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For the more advanced, pentagrams, symbols, sigils, veves and runes (cuneiforms or futharks) work wonders. Antique alphabets, characters and figures have been used across the globe and stand the test of time. Find the trademark that works best for you. No matter which technique you choose, the point is to create something tangible. You can also try automatic writing, which involves invoking spirits and allowing them to speak through you. Remember that we need other energies to assist our magic.

For me, writing is declaring who I am or will become. It’s letting dreams sail into the universe on the wings of a raven. And it’s preparing myself for transitions. I use my own body to spark flame for alchemical processes.

Make friends with ghosts & spirits

Inspired by spirits (or demons should you wish to work with dark forces), automatic writing falls into an advanced category of sex magic trimmings, but by all means try it — don’t shy away. Break into portals and remove walls. Set the mood, light candles, meditate and talk to spirits. They are waiting and listening, ready to intervene. Do not be afraid of ghosts and spirits, for they hold the skeleton key that will unlock potential.

Make an altar

Collecting items is quite simple. Gather whatever it is that makes your body quiver — from your deepest, darkest desires to your most innocent longings. Any of the following items are suggested: flowers or rocks, locks of hair, fingernails, menstrual blood, fallen leaves, candle wax or bound herbs. Start building, placing the items together or inside a special box. May each piece have a special place in your heart, even the tiniest blade of grass matters if you say it does. Welcome each one to the altar. (Yes, you are building an altar.) And with each offering, the altar absorbs your charge.

The ideal altar for sex magic will include all four elements (earth, air, water, fire) plus the fifth (ether). That’s your calling, your divine right, your life’s purpose — you decide how that looks on the altar. But the secret is placing ether as the focal point in order to fortify your sex magic. This will elevate your powers.

Abstinence

A huge part of sex magic is avoiding sex. Yep, that’s right. Sex magic is not about having sex all the time, although there is a time and a place for that sort of sex magic. In order to receive maximum benefits of sex magic, the point is to control energy. It’s like a lot like teasing — sexual stimulation reaches peak and the need to release intensifies. Some might know this from tantric sex sessions. For those who practice yoga, especially kundalini, this will sound familiar. It’s moving the energies throughout the chakras and firing each one as if with a spark. Manipulating energy is the key to sex magic.

The power unleashed during sex magic will be double, even triple, because you didn’t give in. When you control self — both body and ego — you relinquish fears. You trust the universe and let divine timing take over. By concentrating that energy then channeling it into your heart’s desire, your wish becomes more potent. The best sex magic is one that waits for a cosmic whisper that says, "Now is the time — go for it."

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Putting sex magic into practice

To do full-on sex magic spells, take your items and your writings and make a grave for them. Bury them under the full moon, naked. Chant them as if in song. Place them under the mattress where you have sex. Do not underestimate the power of masturbation as a way to charge sex magic amulets. Now things get even more interesting when you realize all you need is yourself. After all, women’s bodies hold enough magic to make dozens of spells a million times over.

Have sex with your magic around. Have your altar within arm's reach or at least visible, and keep those writings nearby. Get a sex orb (an imagined ball of creativity that ignites your sexual experience) rolling above your head as you ride the waves of physical pleasure. Paint symbols on your body and on your partner's body. Use sexual fluids and energy conductors. Menstrual blood and semen explode with magical powers — they can be collected or used in rituals as you see fit.

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To charge a spell, place intention on the thought form — concentrate through breathing techniques. Fire it with emotion and a pure heart — offer it to your altar and allow energies to blossom. Then focus your wishes into an orgasmic state as you imagine your wish coming to fruition. Sex magic primes us for the changes about to happen. It allows our souls to explode with bliss. And in that moment of orgasmic transcendence, we become our truest selves — free from pain, fear and judgment.

Sex magic starts with intention. The mere desire spawns magic. And the elements emanate from there. What you want to avoid, though, is any negative believes, doubts or destructive talk. The only destruction that should take place is between you and barriers, between your dreams and your fears. Break down those walls, believe in sex magic, and start practicing today — and let spirit guide you. You can thank me tomorrow.

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