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Miranda Lambert and Anderson East's relationship takes the next step

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Things are moving pretty quickly between Miranda Lambert and her boyfriend, Anderson East. Lambert has reportedly already been through any relationship’s first major test: meeting the parents. She traveled back to East’s hometown so he could introduce her to them and see whether or not they all hit it off.

More: Miranda Lambert has a new love in her life, and he's purrrfect (PHOTO)

According to Us Weekly, the meeting went off without a hitch. Everyone met in Athens, Alabama, where his family lives, and got along great. It’s always a good sign that things are going well in a relationship when the parents approve.

Lambert isn’t the only one being tested, however. She has been bringing East around her entire friend group to make sure he fits in, and a source says that they all love him. Can you blame them, though? Just give one listen to “Devil in Me” and you’d fall in love with him, too.

More: Miranda Lambert proves she's so over Blake Shelton with new photo

The couple, which was made Instagram official back in January, has been enjoying themselves all over Nashville, where they both live. It is a nice change for Lambert who had to battle ex-husband Blake Shelton’s rising fame everywhere they went. Friends say that when Lambert and East go out on the town, no one bothers them and they can live a relatively normal life. That’s a stark contrast from Shelton’s new love life with girlfriend Gwen Stefani, who are starring in a hit show together. But maybe the vastly different lifestyles are what Lambert and Shelton were looking for and their new significant others are just what they need.

More: Miranda Lambert reveals the heartbreaking way she dealt with divorce

Either way, both new couples are definitely enjoying their budding new relationships and have stayed away from drama, so kudos all around.

Now, when do we start asking Lambert and East for a duet?


Woman's feminist T-shirt brings out the worst in expats in Bangkok

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More: Do you consider yourself a feminist?

What I haven't had are the vile, misogynistic threats levelled at a woman who wore a very similar top in the Thai capital of Bangkok. The photo of her happy, smiling face was posted to a Facebook community page for British expats in the city by a man called Albert, who captioned it: "The day that everybody was afraid of has arrived. Feminism is here."

Sadly Albert is only one of many and it wasn't long before the disgusting comments flooded in.

It's hard to believe that an image of an unnamed woman wearing a T-shirt expressing her belief in equality could spark such hatred.

Her picture was taken on March 8, International Women's Day, and the woman in the picture was a participant in a flash mob event at Central World that aimed to raise awareness about violence against women, revealed Coconuts Bangkok.

One commenter on the Everything Bangkok page wanted to "beat the feminism out of her." Another called her a "c***." A man called Rory declared that he "f***ing hates feminism." The equally enlightened Lawrence claimed that more than "50 per cent" of married expats divorce their Western wives to marry Thai women, which "tells you that your 'feminism' isn't feminine at all and men don't like it."

A man named Rob said the woman would "die alone with 50 cats," while Paul focused on the woman's appearance stating that she would "look better in a dress." Another member called her "a no class westerner." The reactions also included a photo of a smoking gun and an offer to point the woman to some "good suicide spots."

More: 6 videos that will transform how you think about feminism

The Everything Bangkok group was later deleted and a new page created called Everything Bangkok (The original).

Defending the deletion of the group its founder — who goes by the name of Charlie — told Coconuts Bangkok that the disgusting, sexist, threatening comments were nothing but a "joke."

"Everything Bangkok is all about having a joke," he said. "I haven't got anything against feminists and good on them for sticking up for what they believe in… but when people don't agree with them they get upset. Learn to have a laugh and realise it's Facebook. I know there were a few people who took it too far, but there will always be those few people who do no matter what the topic is."

"I was shocked," the woman said of the reaction to her picture. "But, at the same time, I feel like these people proved why we need to be out there doing events and wearing those shirts."

Sarah Martin, an international gender-based violence specialist who has worked for the UN in Bangkok, may be accustomed to reading about appalling statements made by expats on social media but even she was shocked by this particular saga.

"They are talking about beating and raping her. Who can call that a joke? The thread was a shocking intersectionality of racism, classism and sexism," she said.

The flash mob the woman attended was organised by Bangkok Rising, a group of volunteers who focus on gender issues and are working towards getting rid of gender-based violence. In response to the Everything Bangkok backlash, two members of Bangkok Rising created a Buzzfeed post to draw attention to the incident. They named and shamed the offenders, most of whom are Western men, by posting screenshots of their misogynistic comments.

"With the Buzzfeed post, we tried to be hard-hitting, without being vindictive," said one of the members. "We don't hate the people that did this but think it's not OK to do this to someone who did not sign up for the page and the kind of humour there. This is an innocent bystander who didn't deserve to have such things said about her body, her sexuality, her safety. That is abuse.

"The fact that we got so much support shows that people were also shocked by this. It's situations like this around the world that cause kids to end their lives due to cyberbullying."

“Some people might find Everything Bangkok funny but there are actual people in the world, and in that group, that hate women and wouldn't be afraid to inflict violence on a woman," said the woman in the "This is what a feminist looks like" T-shirt. "When you participate in something like that, even making an innocent-seeming joke about a woman making you a sandwich, you are encouraging them."

More: "All men must be feminists" said Annie Lennox during women's rights march

Meet the man who's turned Photoshopping into a biting comment on society

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We've all had a moment when we wished we had the skills to Photoshop an ex-lover or frenemy out of our pictures and there is a skilled graphic designer who will do all of this for you — but his edits are attracting attention for doing things a little differently.

More: This hilarious twist on sexy pictures is taking over the Internet

James Fridman invites people to send him their pictures on Twitter so that he can put his Photoshopping skills to good use but his terms and conditions (which include granting him permission to the rights of his image and to manipulate it as he wishes) may make you realise that the finished product is not going to be exactly as expected.

With over 103,000 followers on Twitter Fridman has gathered quite a fan base. The thing is everything is not always what it seems.

James Fridman Twitter

James Fridman Twitter

The online response to Fridman's images is that they're pretty funny — Fridman interprets the photographs in a completely different way to what the sender asks for. But if you cut beyond the obvious, you realise that he's actually making an important comment on modern society — in this case how we fear responsibility.

His edits also make a thought-provoking observation on our image-obsessed society and how so much importance is attached to looks when it really shouldn't be.

More: Whole world searches for newlyweds to give them a beautiful wedding photo

James Fridman Twitter 7

James Fridman Twitter 7

Fridman's interpretations remind us to love ourselves exactly as we are, to be confident in our skin and not become obsessed with the images portrayed in the media. Like the young girl who asked Fridman for blonder hair and bigger lips, you may not look like a Kardashian but that doesn't make you any less beautiful or worthy of love and admiration.

More: Newborns added to famous paintings in stunning photo series

Fridman's work is going viral because it's making people laugh but do his edits serve a more important purpose? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.

Body parts that need extra TLC because they are most likely to age first

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Have you ever heard someone say their body is just "falling apart" or that grandma died because her body just "wore out"? What does that even mean, really? Clearly there's a lot that happens between someone going from hale and healthy to dying of a heart attack, cancer or some other problem. But what is it?

"How do people fall apart?" isn't quite as common (or as entertaining) a question as "How are babies made?" but perhaps we all should be asking it more. Despite its obvious importance to all of us walking around in these meat sacks, it's still a mystery to most of us how exactly our bodies wear out as we age. So one doctor decided to walk us through the process of how human beings fall apart.

More: 15 Female celebs who have aged gracefully without plastic surgery

It starts with the humble joint, according to Anca Ioviţă, a doctor of both engineering and medicine who currently specializes in gerontology and geriatrics. She explains in her blog post that our joints work by "diffusion," meaning that since cartilage has no blood vessels, nutrients and waste must be passively moved in and out from the surrounding tissues. Because of this, they can get "dehydrated" as we age, causing them to fail.

Your liver will likely be second in line to go, writes Ioviţă. "The liver processes most fats and since they are easily oxidated, they are more difficult to eliminate," she writes in her Longevity Letter, adding this leads to fatty liver disease, a condition that accounts for over 75 percent of all chronic liver disease and affects about 25 percent of people in the U.S. Worse, it can up your risk for cardiovascular disease.

After that, your eyes and ears go as your vision becomes cloudier and your hearing diminishes.

More: 15 quotes from women over 40 that prove age ain't nuthin' but a number

Your heart and cardiovascular system are most likely to decline next, she says. "Atherosclerosis may be silent up to your 70s, but afterwards you will start to notice its symptoms," she writes. "The heart gets bigger, especially the left ventricle. And its valves get calcified, especially the aortic one, and its collagen gets cross-linked."

Your lungs and kidneys may also start to fail around this time.

But it's our primary organ, our brain, that hangs on the longest in most cases, Ioviţă says. The brain is usually the last to go, with degenerative brain disease starting to manifest in otherwise healthy individuals in their 80s. "Sure, people may forget slight things when in their 50s, 60s or 70s, but it is usually in the 80s when dementia becomes dangerous for them and for those around them," she explains.

This isn't a surety, she adds, but rather the pattern doctors see most often in their patients. And knowing this progression of weakness now can give you an opportunity to take steps now to protect yourself. Thankfully the things that help #1 on the list, your joints — things like daily exercise, a healthy diet, plentiful sleep — are the same things that can help the bigger problems further down the road. And, at the very least, now you can say you know both how babies are made and how adults fall apart.

Sticky Asian chicken bites are as addictive as they sound

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What if I told you it can totally be satisfied with a super-easy at-home recipe?

Cue the fireworks.

The best part is that we're baking the chicken too, so you don't get that greasy knot in your stomach like you would with takeout, but the sauce is salty, sweet and sticky all the same. This could easily be a get-dinner-on-the-table-in-30-minutes kind of meal (served alongside some white rice) or a great appetizer to feed a crowd — just stick a bunch of toothpicks into the chicken, and watch them disappear.

Sticky Asian chicken bites
Image: Gina Matsoukas/SheKnows

Sticky Asian chicken bite recipe

Serves 4

Prep time: 15 minutes | Cook time: 15 minutes | Total time: 30 minutes

Ingredients:

  • 1 pound chicken breasts or boneless thighs, cut into bite-size cubes
  • 1 egg
  • 2 tablespoons milk
  • 1/3 cup flour
  • 1 cup breadcrumbs
  • 2 tablespoons canola oil
  • 2 garlic cloves, minced
  • 2 tablespoons peanut butter
  • 1 tablespoon honey
  • 1/3 cup low-sodium soy sauce
  • 1-1/2 teaspoons Sriracha sauce
  • Sesame seeds, for garnish
  • Chopped cilantro or green onion, for garnish

Directions:

  1. Heat the oven to 400 degrees F, and line a baking sheet with a silicone baking mat or parchment paper.
  2. In a shallow bowl, whisk together the egg and milk.
  3. Into another shallow bowl, pour the flour, and into a third bowl, pour the breadcrumbs.
  4. Dredge the chicken pieces in the flour, then dip them in the egg, and coat them in the breadcrumbs. Place the chicken pieces on the baking sheet.
  5. Bake for about 15 minutes, until the chicken is cooked through.
  6. Meanwhile, in a small saucepot over medium heat, combine the canola oil and the garlic. Simmer for 1 minute, until fragrant — do not let the garlic burn.
  7. Add the peanut butter and honey to the pot, and whisk until dissolved and smooth.
  8. Add the soy sauce and Sriracha sauce, and continue whisking until thickened. Remove from the heat, and set aside.
  9. Remove the chicken from the oven once cooked. Pour the sauce on top of the chicken pieces, and toss gently with a spatula until all the pieces are coated in the sauce.
  10. Garnish with sesame seeds and cilantro or green onions.
  11. Serve alongside rice for dinner or with toothpicks for an appetizer.

More chicken recipes

Spicy cola- and jalapeño-glazed chicken wings
Asian-style chicken with garlic rice
Asian-style chicken nuggets with lemon glaze

Gwen Stefani makes confession about correcting her divorce rumors

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Gwen Stefani has been very open about her divorce and the heartbreak that she endured, which she channeled into her new album, This Is What the Truth Feels Like. And during a new interview, she touched on the creation process behind it.

More: Blake Shelton is dealing with his divorce differently than Gwen Stefani

"I wasn't thinking. I was feeling, and I was dying," Stefani told GQ. "And then I was just like, 'You can't go down like this! You have to turn this into music. You have to try, at least.' I was so embarrassed by just everything. I just didn't want to be that person that just went down after all of that."

She continued, "A lot of the time in the sessions, they weren't letting me write. They were giving me tracks and doing it all. I was like, Why am I here? Then I got the perfect combination of people to really support me and make me feel confident. It was an amazing awakening. I walked into the session, and I was like, 'You gotta know, I don't care about anything except the truth right here.'"

More: Christina Aguilera's reportedly using Miranda Lambert to upset Blake Shelton

While her deeply emotional tracks may be a change from her earlier punk rock music, they are achieving critical acclaim nonetheless, and the album clearly means a lot to Stefani. But it has also served as a way to correct the tabloid rumors surrounding her divorce (and Gavin Rossdale's alleged affair with the family nanny) and provided her with a way of telling the truth; of telling her version of what really happened.

More: Gwen Stefani has the best reason for keeping quiet about Gavin Rossdale

"Everything happens so fast. It's all happening in real time in the sense that, 'Used to Love You' came out only a couple weeks after I wrote it," she told GQ. "The only reason I did that was just being honest. There's been a lot of dishonesty around me, and I just don't understand that because it's just not how I live. I didn't want to make a record: I just wanted to not die. That's it. The fact that now I have a record and people are hearing it, it just blows my mind."

Do you feel the emotion in Gwen Stefani's new album? Do you think it's much more than just a breakup project? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

celeb divorces 2015 slideshow
Image: WENN.com

7 California theme parks that will blow your kids' minds

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Native Californians and tourists alike, you can add these top California theme parks to your summer bucket list. Whether your family is finally ready to make the big Disneyland trek or just wants to spend the day screaming on Six Flags Magic Mountain's Goliath roller coaster — these California theme parks are popular for a reason.

More: 35 things all kids need

No matter which park you choose (or even if you decide to hit them all this summer), you're bound to have a family vacation you'll never forget:

1. Best amusement park roller coaster

Goliath roller coaster
Image: Jeremy Thompson/Flickr

Six Flags Magic Mountain
26101 Magic Mountain Parkway, Valencia

Whether it's the more than 200-foot drop into a hole in the ground or the complete stop, leaving you hanging on your side above the ground, Six Flags Magic Mountain's Goliath is known as one of the best roller coasters in California. For the best experience, wait the extra few minutes for the front seat.

More: 15 things moms need to tell their daughters

2. Best theme park thrill ride

Supreme Scream
Image: Jeremy Thompson/Flickr

Knott's Berry Farm
8039 Beach Boulevard, Buena Park

Be warned — the Knott’s Berry Farm Supreme Scream ride has been categorized as a level 5 “Aggressive Thrill.” If that doesn’t deter you, then get ready for the ride of your life. Located on the park's boardwalk, the 45-second ride hits a top speed of 50 mph as it propels riders 252 feet straight up into the air, where you will experience three seconds of weightlessness before being plummeted back to earth. We recommend riding this thriller before lunch.

3. Best theme park for families

Disneyland castle
Image: Anna Fox/Flickr

Disneyland & Disney's California Adventure
1313 Harbor Boulevard, Anaheim

The "happiest place on earth" offers two great amusement parks for every member of your family. With baby centers that include facilities for diaper changing, nursing and bottle feeding throughout Disneyland, Disney's California Adventure and the Downtown Disney District, visitors young and old can have fun with the comforts of home while hanging with the Disney family of characters.

More: How to tell if you're too involved in your kids' lives

4. Best amusement park for adults

Universal Studios Hollywood
Image: Michael Sheehan/Flickr

Universal Studios Hollywood
100 Universal City Plaza, Universal City

Hollywood magic is brought to life when you get a VIP pass to Universal Studios' movie-based theme park. Although there are attractions and shows for every age, this amusement park is best suited for teens and adults due to loud noises, high action and life-like special effects. Heads up: The Wizarding World of Harry Potter is the big attraction coming in spring 2016.

Next Up: Best water park

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5. Best water park

Raging Waters
Image: DebMomOf3/Flickr

Raging Waters
111 Raging Waters Drive, San Dimas

Nestled inside the Frank G. Bonelli Regional Park's boundaries, Southern California's largest water park is packed with seasonal water park fun. With a lazy river, rafting slides and body slides at every thrill level, water play areas and gentle water fun designed especially for babies and preschoolers, you can cool off while having a sizzling good time.

6. Best theme park for kids

Legoland California
Image: Fido/Flickr

Legoland California
One Legoland Drive, Carlsbad

This Lego-themed amusement park uses its famous plastic building blocks everywhere they can, including their rides. Legoland offers fun for older and younger visitors, but is best for families with kids ages 4 to 9 years old.

More: 7 places that you can travel to for less than $1,000

7. Best amusement park for teens

Discovery Kingdom
Image: Hans Trapp/Flickr

Six Flags Discovery Kingdom
2001 Marine World Pkwy., Vallejo, CA 94589

Take thrilling roller coasters, wild animals and marine life, and you're guaranteed a day of fun. With thrill rides for the adventure seeker and family-friendly fun, you'll feel safe letting your teens spend time exploring the park on their own.

Quick tip: To save some dough while having some amusement park fun, pack your own picnic lunch. Many theme parks have a picnic area just outside the park, such as Disneyland's Downtown Disney, to allow visitors to eat their own fare. Just check out the websites of the seven best theme parks in California before you go and be prepared for some big-time fun!

Best California theme parks
Image: Gabriela Arellano/SheKnows;Image via Getty Images

Updated by Bethany Ramos on 3/21/2016

Cool and exotic girl names that are just quirky enough

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If you're looking for a baby name that doesn't top the U.S. charts, these cool and exotic girl names have a little something for everyone. Parents with a love of language might enjoy a romantic French girl's name or a melodic Irish moniker for their little lass on the way. Moms and dads who are looking for a baby name that's more offbeat than traditional may appreciate one of these unexpected picks from across the pond.

Check out some of our favorite cool and exotic girl names, broken down by origin:

Irish girl names

Irish girl names are a popular choice for parents here in the U.S. — and we can see why! Check out these beautiful and feminine Irish girl names.

More: 25 cute & clever onesies for twins

French girl names

These French girl names are romantic with beautiful meanings. Check out some of our top picks of names that will be perfect for your little French rose.

More: Why good moms lie to their kids ... sometimes

Spanish girl names

Many Americans can speak Spanish, making these delightful names a popular choice. Check out our picks of Spanish girl names for your little bebe.

More: How swearing like a sailor made it a lot easier to give birth

Italian girl names

Italian girl names have a melodic sound to them, often ending in the letter "a.". If you love these beautiful and feminine names, check out our top picks below.

cool and exotic girl names
Image: SheKnows Design

Updated by Bethany Ramos on 3/21/2016


How I fell in love with a so 'not my type' man

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Literally. My walls were gone. A flood had torn through my home and destroyed most of its interior. I was a mess of a woman, comprised mostly of sweat and frustration, when Danny came to my house to tell me that he would take care of the water damage restoration before handing the job to another contractor for the rebuild.

I was glad he was there, but I hardly paid any attention to him. I was busy trying to keep my head above the proverbial water, and he was quiet, a little shy, and easy enough to overlook while I was treading through my chaos. Day after day, though, he showed up when he said he would, called me to give me updates, and was calm and caring when I burst into tears about the house repairs.

One day, I even found myself calling him to vent about an issue that wasn't entirely related to the renovation.

"I appreciate your friendship," he said, after I made him laugh about whatever nonsense was on my mind. "Something about you puts me at ease."

I also laughed as we made the somewhat awkward transition from a professional relationship to a friendship. "Quit being such a weirdo, dude. I'll call you later."

More: 6 differences between couples who make it out of a rut and those who don't

I did call him later. It was probably to update him on more of my nonsense, like my need for a long overdue haircut or my problems with finding a place to do laundry. It was during that phone call, though, that he told me he would like to manage my home rebuild if I wanted to hire him for it. Normally he just dealt with demolition and water damage. I leapt at the chance to hire someone I knew I could trust.

And thus began several months of intermingling business and friendship. We spent entire days at the Home Depot, where I was able to see how patient and kind he was towards my daughter. He invited me to a Rosh Hashanah barbecue because his family still lives in Israel and he wanted to celebrate with a friend. We stayed up late looking at floor plans and paint colors, and he pretended the whole time that he was fascinated by the project.

During the fall, a neighbor of mine came by the house to see the progress when Danny and I were drinking a glass of wine together. She texted me later and said, "Oh my gosh, Mary. Do you know how he looks at you? He's so in love with you."

I laughed out loud. No way, I thought. Danny was a friend. He was a full five inches shorter than me. He was an Israeli Jew and I was a Christian from Texas. He was patient and kind and trustworthy and generous, and I'd always enjoyed men who were a little dangerous (ahem, abusive). I kept the text to myself, and looked at him. No way.

And then I started rambling about my dating problems and how I could find men who wanted to date me, but not men who wanted to be with me.

And then he looked at me with his big brown eyes and said, "Surely you know by now that I want to be with you."

More: 11 things we learned about real relationships

When I was in my early twenties, a similar scenario had played out with a friend of mine. We were buddies, until one night when he took me to get frozen yogurt and told me he was in love with me and had been since we were teenagers. At that time — when I didn't know the value of a kind and generous man — I told him I was flattered but not interested. A week later, I met my emotionally abusive ex-husband, and never talked to that friend again.

This time, I wanted to give a different answer — an answer that was seasoned by the experience of just how bad a relationship can be, and just how important a good man is. I wanted to try a relationship with a trustworthy friend who was categorically not my type, but perhaps exactly the kind of man I most desired.

So I did. And he's good.

Stop assuming my husband secretly wishes he had sons

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Ask people what they envision the perfect family looks like, and most likely they’ll say one that includes two kids — a boy and a girl. What happens when your family falls outside this scenario? And what if (gasp!) you’re okay with that?

More: I gave away my son's toys to charity in anger — and I don't regret it

Our first child was a girl, and upon her birth, friends and family congratulated my husband and me. Shortly thereafter, people asked when we were going to start trying for a boy. Although we wanted a second child, we were not tied to having a boy for the sake of equaling out the genders.

My husband and I discussed how great it would be for our daughter to have a little sister — a mini her and our daughter 2.0. After all, I’ve experienced sisterly love firsthand — my older sister and I are best friends. We guided each other while growing up and still do so today. I imagined that type of relationship between my own children.

A few years later, to our delight, I became pregnant again. We didn't know the baby’s gender when we attended my friend’s Thanksgiving dinner. The gathering included her extended family, and my friend had already announced my pregnancy prior to my arrival. After mingling and helping my daughter settle in, I decided to make a bathroom stop. As I walked down the hallway, a raspy voice barked, “So you want a boy now, right?”

More: How a traditional mother raised feminist daughters

I stopped and turned. My friend’s aunt was sitting in the room I had just passed. “Excuse me?” I inquired.

"You already have a girl, so you want a boy,” she stated matter-of-factly.

"Um, not necessarily,” I said. “Our preference is for another girl, but we will love our baby no matter what its gender.”

"Oh, come on, that’s just what you want,” scoffed the aunt. “Your husband really wants a boy — all guys do.”

I paused, in shock that someone would make such brazen assumptions about my husband and me and actually voice them to my face. Did I do something to offend her? Was it her wine talking? Then again, this was the “crazy aunt” my friend had mentioned. I glanced down the hallway for my friend, husband or daughter — anyone, really — to no avail.

It is not my personality to talk back to elders, especially relatives of my friends, but I felt like I had to defend myself. I slowly but firmly said, “No, really, my husband would be okay with two girls and no boys.”

The aunt quipped, “Sure, you go ahead and believe that. He’s just saying what you want to hear. Good luck if you have a girl. You’ll need it."

I did not like this conversation and had no energy to fight, so I excused myself and went into the bathroom, fuming about what had just happened. How dare she be so dismissive, as if she knew my husband better than me? It’s not like we could choose our baby’s gender anyway. Why is it so hard to believe that a man can prefer having only daughters?

Somehow I got through the dinner and avoided any communication with the aunt. On the drive home, I told my husband what had happened. He was supportive and felt bad he wasn’t there during the incident to defend me.

Later in the week, I told my friend about my exchange with her aunt. She felt terrible and apologized profusely, even though it wasn’t her fault. She explained that her mom and aunt didn't get along and merely tolerated each other for the holidays. She mentioned the strained relationships her aunt had with her own daughters but not with her son. I realized then that I shouldn’t take the incident personally because her aunt’s behavior stemmed from her own experiences.

Six months later, I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby girl. Today I see the bond between my two daughters, who hold hands, hug and play together. So far their relationship mirrors the one I had with my older sister, and it puts a smile on my face. Now when people ask if we’re trying for a third baby to get a boy, I simply say, “No, we’re not. We’re happy as is.”

More: 9 ways to deal when the kids like their nanny more than you

Your dog will love this DIY tug toy

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There is not a dog on earth that doesn't love to get down with a good game of fetch or tug-of-war. If your frisky little buddy has destroyed all of his toys, as playful pups often do, you can put together a new and fun toy for your dog in a few minutes flat using this easy DIY tutorial.

This upcycled ball-and-tug dog toy is a quickie, with no sewing required:

DIY ball & tug dog toy

DIY ball & tug dog toy
Image: Eileen Chow/SheKnows

Supplies:

  • 1 Old T-shirt
  • 1 Tennis ball
  • Scissors

Instructions:

1. Snipping up your shirt

DIY ball & tug dog toy
Image: Eileen Chow/SheKnows

Lay your T-shirt on a flat surface, and mark off your cuts. You’ll want to make 2 pieces that are about 5-6 inches wide and a thinner strip about 2 inches wide. Once you cut up your T-shirt, you’ll end up with 3 tube-like pieces. Simply snip each of them at one of the ends to make them into long straps.

More: Make this cute DIY dog toy with a few scraps of fleece (VIDEO)

Next Up: X marks the spot

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2. X marks the spot

DIY ball & tug dog toy
Image: Eileen Chow/SheKnows

Lay the 2 wide strips in the shape of an X, and place the tennis ball in the middle.

Next Up: Wrap it up

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3. Wrap it up

DIY ball & tug dog toy
Image: Eileen Chow/SheKnows

Wrap the ball with all layers, and gather the strips at the bottom of the ball. Take your skinny strip, and tie a tight double knot to secure the fabric-wrapped ball. Now you should have four wide strips hanging from the base of your ball.

More: 8 Cute dog toys from the quirkiest shops on Etsy

Next Up: Just a little more snipping

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4. Just a little more snipping

DIY ball & tug dog toy
Image: Eileen Chow/SheKnows

Take 1 of the 4 wide strips, and separate it from the rest. Cut this piece into 3 even sections.

Next Up: Braid that rope

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5. Braid that rope

DIY ball & tug dog toy
Image: Eileen Chow/SheKnows

Braid the 3 newly cut strips until you get near the bottom, and then tie the ends with 1 of the strips. Snip the ends so they’re even. Then repeat steps 5 and 6 with the rest of the remaining strips of cloth.

More: 6 Hands-free products that play with your pet

DIY ball & tug dog toy
Image: Eileen Chow/SheKnows

And here’s your finished dog toy! Now it’s time to test it out with your furry friend.

DIY ball & tug dog toy

Image: Eileen Chow/SheKnows

Updated by Bethany Ramos on 3/22/2016

Frances Bean Cobain finds comfort in mom Courtney Love amid divorce reports

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Frances Bean Cobain is divorcing her husband, Isaiah Silva, after not even two years — and things may turn nasty if Silva attempts to get his hands on her estate.

More: Frances Bean Cobain proves she's just as captivating as her dad Kurt Cobain

The couple married in an intimate ceremony on June 29, 2014, but their marriage was to be short-lived, as Us Weekly reports that their date of separation is listed as Feb. 24, 2016. And the couple is now hashing out the legal aspects of their divorce.

According to TMZ, Cobain is nervous that Silva, the frontman of band The Eeries, will make a claim for father Kurt Cobain's estate, which is reportedly worth $450 million, and included a mention in her divorce documents stating that Silva has no right to her father's money, although the records note that she is willing to pay him spousal support.

More: Hayley Williams gives the best advice for anyone bullied for their appearance

People magazine also shed light on Cobain's divorce after allegedly obtaining the divorce documents, which cite "irreconcilable differences." The documents also state that all premarital assets, including her inheritance, be awarded to her as separate property.

It appears that Cobain may be taking comfort in her mother, Courtney Love (the pair rekindled after years of estrangement in December).

More: Courtney Love and Frances Bean may actually like being family

Taking to Instagram on Wednesday, Love posted a photo of her daughter enjoying a glass of Champagne in London's Claridges hotel. She captioned the post with a simple but heartwarming message, "tea at Claridges with my baby @space_witch666 #proudmom #London."

Courtney Love Instagram

Courtney Love Instagram

Are you pleased to see that Courtney Love has reconnected with her daughter? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.

How to get your kid through the last three months of high school

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Though the pressure of college application season is now largely in the past, the trials and tribulations of high school are not yet over for parents and their students. As March becomes April, three months remain in the school year, and all three of them are important.

More: 7 ways to help your student conquer senioritis

If this is your first time guiding a child through the transition from high school to college, you might be wondering what you can expect. Ultimately, each student’s experience is uniquely her own, but the guide that appears below can give you a general sense of what to expect in April, May and June.

April

This is perhaps the most stressful of the three months that remain in your child’s high school career. If your student has not yet selected a college or university, she will likely need to do so by the halfway point of the month. You may accordingly find yourself visiting prospective campuses once more, as well as evaluating and comparing financial aid offers. This is also an excellent time for your child to touch base with current students and alumni.

Once your student chooses a school, remind her to contact her other options and inform them of her decision. Doing so can open a spot on the waitlist for another individual. And if your child is anxiously awaiting an update on her own waitlist designation, the beginning of April is when she may receive it.

More: 7 extracurriculars that can help your middle schooler develop leadership skills

May

By May, your student will probably have established a new home for the next four years, and her actions this month can affect her transition in August. If she is registered for AP or dual-enrollment courses this year, May is when she will need to sit for an end-of-year AP exam. She may also have finals in her dual-enrollment classes.

Both of these course formats can award valuable college credit, so it is important to ensure your child is well rested and prepared for these high-stakes tests and papers. Fixing your student a nutritious breakfast or helping her study for the AP computer science A exam are just a couple of great ways to show your support. Once she receives her scores, she may appreciate your help with navigating what this means for her freshman class schedule.

June

This is, of course, the month of high school graduation. While your child should have had an appointment with her guidance counselor earlier in the school year to verify she has met all her academic requirements, it can still be worthwhile to double-check that she has filed all the necessary paperwork and paid any outstanding fees.

Following graduation, your student should contact her college or university to ask the same questions: Are there any fees or forms that must be addressed? And what is the deadline for submitting her final transcript? Then as the summer begins, you and your child can turn your attention to buying dorm supplies, contacting roommates, registering for classes and other exciting pre-college tasks!

More: 3 things parents should know about the redesigned SAT

For more tips and strategies to help your student succeed in school, visit varsitytutors.com.

The secret ingredient every cheese lover needs to know about

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If you love cheese, chances are you've had a grainy, oily disaster with cheese dip, mac and cheese or cheese soup at least once in your life. It's enough to leave you wondering how food manufacturers do it (and what chemicals they're using). The good news is, one such chemical is sodium citrate, which is safe and available to consumers.

What is sodium citrate?

Sodium citrate may sound like one of those food additives you should avoid, but it's a perfectly natural byproduct (the salt) of citric acid. It has a variety of applications, but with cheese it emulsifies oils. In other words, it helps keep your melted cheese or cheese sauce from separating.

If you're turned off by how chemical it sounds, don't be. It's no different from using baking powder for leavening in bread. And it's easier to use than making a roux.

What's it like?

Basically it looks like very fine sugar. Alone, it has a mild bitter/salty flavor (like the diluted version of lemon pith if it were lightly salted), but it's very faint even in its pure form. You typically use very little, so it doesn't flavor your food, though you should use it in the lowest concentration possible. Store it at room temperature, even after opening. You can buy it from Modernist Pantry (Amazon, $12).

How do you use it to make melty cheese?

The best part of sodium citrate is the effect it has on cheese. You can turn any cheese, no matter how oily or grainy it would normally be when melting, into Cheez Whiz-worthy melty goodness in a matter of minutes.

All you need is a little hot liquid, some cheese and the sodium citrate.

Start with any liquid — water, milk... even beer. Heat the liquid until hot but not boiling. Then dissolve the sodium citrate. The amount you need depends on a number of factors, but it's usually only a few grams.

Then add your shredded cheese a little at a time, and whisk to combine, adding a little more as it melts. If your cheese is harder (like sharp cheddar), you may want to use an immersion blender to boost the effects of the sodium citrate. But usually you'll need no more than a whisk.

While you can also add a number of spices and flavorings after the cheese has melted, you should start with a simple recipe, like pepper jack cheese queso. Once you've gotten the hang of it, you can use sodium citrate in soups, mac and cheese and more.

More cheese recipes

The best cheese for grilled cheese sandwiches, according to science
Ham- and cheese-stuffed chicken rolls — easy to make and addictively good
Everything you need to know about frying cheese (no, not mozzarella sticks)

Farrah Abraham's adoption plans sound too good to be true

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Teen Mom star Farrah Abraham may be the most controversial of her cast mates. From starring in her own sex tape to engaging in social spats on Twitter, Abraham never leaves her fans bored. But her most recent endeavor is raising eyebrows for a different reason.

In a recent interview, Abraham declared that she's ready to give her 6-year-old daughter, Sophia, a sibling. She stated that Sophia is pushing for a little sister and that she hopes to be able to give her one within two years. Abraham says she wants to adopt a girl — specifically, a baby girl or a girl who is around the 3-year mark.

More: Mom refuses to back down when museum tells her to stop breastfeeding

When asked about her future and how she would handle the conversations with her daughters pertaining to her racy past, Abraham said she will simply "keep it real" with them, that she will discuss it with them like a friend would.

farrah abraham adoption interview

farrah abraham adoption interview

As of right now, Abraham has only her daughter Sophia's questions to answer, but the reality star seems ready to make adoption plans in the near future. But is she ready? Adopting a child is truly one of the most beautiful gifts to give, but it's not nearly as easy as this interview makes it sound.

Abraham's very specific about what she wants — a girl ranging from a newborn to around 3 years old. It appears as though she has not yet done her homework on the adoption process, because if she had, she would know that most adoption agencies do not allow parents to choose the gender of the child they'll be adopting.

More: Video captures 5-year-old's heroic efforts to save her drowning mom

Not to mention, the two-year time frame may not be up to Abraham.

First, prospective parents generally have to select an agency. Then they need to complete a home study, in which they'll be interviewed by a social worker multiple times so they can get a good gauge of whether or not the prospective parents are ready to welcome an additional child into the family. If you don't pass, you don't get to adopt, whether you want to or not.

After that, a mom- and/or dad-to-be works with a social worker to begin the search for a child who is a good match for the family, and at that point, if all parties agree, you may potentially be able to begin visiting the selected child. Once all this has happened, a parent may or may not receive a placement, and the adoption process will be finalized after she meets with a judge and receives an amended birth certificate.

And, of course, parents have to fork over anywhere from $10,000 to $25,000 in fees and expenses throughout the adoption process if they adopt privately. All in all, the process can take anywhere from two to seven years for a healthy infant, while it can vary for other kids.

More: The one 'bad parenting' habit I just can't seem to break

Though it may come with a hefty price tag and a lengthy list of requirements, giving a child a proper home is the greatest gift they could ever receive. Many people build their families through adoption, so while Farrah Abraham's got a long road ahead of her, if she's as committed as she says she is, that road will be totally worth it.

Before you go, check out our slideshow below:

crazy places birth
Image: Imagesmore/Getty Images

The 'ideal' beauty model photo shows how far we have to go

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What do you think is beautiful? So much of the answer to that question depends on how we grew up and what we were exposed to as children.

Canva is a design firm and they took a look at faces in various advertisements and constructed a vision of "ideal beauty" for ads. How it works: These are 10 faces frequently featured in campaigns. Put together, they equal this:

More: Photographer celebrates natural hair with breathtaking project

ideal beauty
Image: Canva

So this is beauty, eh? And they didn't stop with beauty alone. They also looked at car ads and clothing ads and electronic ads, and what they found is that "beauty" really just means uniform. And Caucasian. According to Canva:

"Aesthetics is a major component of advertising (probably the most crucial element of all ads across all forms of media, aside from those obnoxious jingles you hear on the radio), and brand models comprehensively represent the companies in a very important way. When you look at the face of a specific brand, you want to think to yourself, 'I trust that person. I like that person. That person is like me, and I want to buy whatever it is that they are so gosh darn enthusiastic about.'”

More: Woman's allergic reaction to hair dye is an important lesson for us all

Sometimes we can look at pop culture and movies and advertisements and think we are getting more diversity in skin color and body shapes, but then we see something like this and realize how far we still have to go. Trustworthy still means white in many places. This campaign is so important in terms of changing not only beauty "norms," but also in terms of how we view our fellow citizens. Do we automatically trust only people who look like us? And if so: How can we change that so we have a more inclusive society? In the end, that is really good for all of us.

Teresa Giudice posts series of sad photos during Joe's first day in prison

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Joe Giudice started his 41-month prison sentence for fraud charges on Wednesday, and perhaps one of the hardest parts of being behind bars is the fact that he'll be away from his wife, Teresa, and four daughters for such a lengthy amount of time.

More: Joe Giudice's time behind bars will be very different from Teresa's

It's obviously a very emotional time for the family, and Teresa recently took to Instagram to share a series of pictures of Joe. In one, she shared a photo of herself and her husband smiling into the camera, which she captioned with a simple, "The Love of my Life."

Teresa Giudice Instagram 2

Teresa Giudice Instagram 2

She also shared a heartwarming image of Joe and their four daughters, Gia, 15, Gabriella, 11, Milania, 10, and Audriana, and another shot of the entire family.

Teresa Giudice Instagram

Teresa Giudice Instagram

Teresa Giudice Instagram 3

Teresa Giudice Instagram 3

It's clear the family is going through a very hard time, and saying goodbye to Joe must have been unimaginably hard, but Teresa has the support of her friends, family and fans, and she took to Twitter to thank everyone for it.

Teresa Giudice Twitter

Teresa Giudice Twitter

As for Joe, he has already released a statement from behind bars in the Federal Correctional Institute, Fort Dix, in New Jersey. But what can he really expect his time in prison to be like?

Giudice previously brushed off the low-security prison as "not a big deal," saying during an interview with People magazine, "They tell me that the low security and the camp there are almost the same, so it's no big deal."

But a former Fort Dix employee has since revealed to Us Weekly exactly what Giudice can expect while incarcerated.

Giudice would initially be searched and undergo a special scan for "anything metal internally," the source told the publication. He will then be placed "into a special housing unit for a day or two until he is medically cleared, and then will likely be assigned to the minimum security camp."

Giudice may share his quarters with about 200 other inmates, but if he is not placed in the camp, then he will either be in a low- or medium-security housing unit, where, according to the source, "there are 12 to 18 inmates in a room."

More: RHONJ's Joe Giudice is going to regret his recent behavior when he's in jail

If this is to be Giudice's new home, then he, "won't be watched if he goes to the bathroom or showers."

Giudice will be able to spend $300 a month, once a week, at the commissary on items such as shampoo and deodorant. And when it comes to food, it's not really that bad.

"The food isn't bad," the former employee revealed. "A lot of chicken, vegetables, a salad bar and even some desserts, depending on the day of the week."

He will also have visiting hours during business hours and will be able to spend "300 minutes of phone time per month and has to pay by the minute."

That's not all. According to the source, "He will also have access to rudimentary email … but can't go on the Internet."

Perhaps Joe was right? Not that anyone would ever want to trade places with him, but his time behind bars doesn't sound like it'll be too grueling.

Is this what you pictured when you imagined Joe Giudice's prison sentence? Do you think he will have a tough time behind bars? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.

Kristin Cavallari thinks her hubby owes her for her three pregnancies

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After three kids, most people are ready to be officially "done" with the entire conception-gestation-delivery part of parenthood. In fact, no matter how many kids you have, at some point most parents are ready to call it quits, preferring not to hedge their bets and opting instead to focus on the kids they've already got. Kristin Cavallari is no different; the author and busy mom of three decided that after the birth of her youngest daughter Saylor, she was officially done.

And hey, we've all been there or will be there at some point. The tricky part is that our bodies don't really know that we're all set on chafed nipples and third-degree tears, so it just continues to play a little game of Russian roulette with our eggs and whatever sperm comes around. That means that unless we want our partners to wrap it up or that we take some form of hormonal birth control until menopause, someone's going to have to go under the knife and have their bits tinkered with.

More: Kristin Cavallari's homemade baby formula recipe raises red flags

Cavallari's been very clear on this point to her husband, Jay Cutler: After three rounds of pregnancy and pushing, it's his turn to take one for the team. And by "take one for the team," she definitely means the ol' snippity-snip. A vasectomy.

And when it comes right down to it, she's not wrong, is she? Her argument, which is basically that carrying and delivering three children and experiencing all the restrictions and pain that come with those two events (joyous though they may be) is the sum of her contribution to their family planning strategy. She puts it in pretty simple words: "My philosophy is, we have to push the babies out. We are the ones who have to go through everything. So you can do one little thing and get snipped."

For sure, she's not the only one who feels that way. And while some men are eager to put the pregnancy scares and condoms away for good, other dudes are a little less than overjoyed to go have their vas deferens snipped and cauterized. Fears run the gamut from concerns about pain to feeling less like a virile sex god to wanting to keep their options open just in case the marriage goes pear shaped and they want to father children in the future.

Oh boy.

More: The one 'bad parenting' habit I just can't seem to break

While all these concerns have their own varying degrees of validity, none of them is really good enough to put the kibosh on the snip with a dedicated partner, mostly because they can all be approached rationally: Vasectomies are reversible, it is not the sperm that makes the man, etc., etc. But let's talk about that pain bit for a second.

Is a vasectomy painful? Hard to say if you've never had one and don't even have the equipment necessary to get one. For sure, it's not going to be something you dreamily reminisce about — it doesn't feel good. But guys who get it done mostly say that the worst part is getting the numbing shot to their nethers. But even that is more like a bee sting to the balls than a sucker punch to the scrote.

And none of it holds a candle to a daylong string of contractions that really ends one of three ways — a vaginal birth with no tearing, which is still ungodly painful; a vaginal birth where the most sensitive parts on your body tear like cheap pantyhose; or a C-section, which you're hopefully numbed for but brings the promise of weeks of sobbing on the toilet, in the car and in the line for a Vicodin refill that's moving way too slowly.

More: Judge's advice for Madonna and Guy Ritchie applies to all divorced parents

Even if you opt for the epidural, you're not getting it until you're nice and dilated, which means you get to experience those contractions in technicolor pain for a few hours. Then when it wears off, welcome to the world of feeling like your vag is made of raw hamburger meat for a few weeks. Ain't childbirth magical?

The fact is, when two straight, cis people decide they want a baby or four, the woman implicitly accepts that she will be the one responsible for the physical toll it will take — she takes on the morning sickness, sciatica and hemorrhoids, followed by the actual nightmare show of delivering that baby, and then wraps it all up with some cracked nipples and a forever weakened bladder. That's the price you pay to grow your family.

When two straight, cis people decide they're done, it's the dude's job to step up to the plate. He should take on the needle prick near his prick, the three days of frozen peas and Netflix-bingeing and the 10 days of not lifting anything too heavy while he walks around bowlegged. That's the price you pay for bidding diaper changes, condoms and libido-killing pills away, whether you're a celebrity like Jay Cutler or just an everyday dude.

You are seriously getting the better end of the bargain in this one, so take it and run with it while you're still ahead.

Before you go, check out our slideshow below:

crazy places birth
Image: Imagesmore/Getty Images

Bringing Up Bates shows Kelly Jo's hilarious reaction to Whitney's baby news

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Tonight, Bringing Up Bates was all about grandbaby Bradley's first birthday. Or so we thought.

More: Bringing Up Bates' Michaela Keilen hints at starting a family

Eldest Bates son Zach and his wife Whitney planned a grand birthday party for Bradley, who is the eldest grandchild for Kelly Jo and Gil Bates. And it was a big deal for the family clan. Everyone came out for the party: grandparents, great grandparents, aunts and uncles (meaning the Bates siblings) and, of course, friends of the couple.

Since almost all of the Bates family was there (except for some of the older, married kids like Michaela and Brandon Keilen, and Alyssa and John Webster, because they live out of state), it was the perfect time to make a big family announcement.

And make one Zach and Whitney did.

The problem: Kelly Jo and Gil didn't exactly get it at first.

More: Bringing Up Bates' Chad & Erin Paine reveal baby's gender and name (EXCLUSIVE)

Zach and Whitney presented her parents and his parents, as well as their grandparents, with photos of the family of three. But what Kelly Jo didn't realize because she didn't have her glasses was that in the photo the family was holding a sign. And on the sign there was a message. A very important message that read, "Our family is growing by two feet and one heart, Baby Bates is due to arrive Summer (sic) 2016."

Zach and Whitney Bates instagram 2

Zach and Whitney Bates instagram 2

"It went right over our heads," Gil said with a laugh later while talking to the cameras.

"I think we were the last to know," Kelly Jo added with a smile.

But their confusion only made the moment all the more memorable. It was shared with excitement as the girls squealed and everyone congratulated the expectant family. Kelly Jo's jaw literally dropped when Gil did finally read the announcement to her.

More: Nathan Bates may have just confirmed his courtship on Bringing Up Bates

"I wanted to cry. I was just so happy," Whitney said of the moment. "And it was so loud in there because Carlin and all the girls were screaming 'Oh, my goodness! I can't believe you're pregnant!' It was just such a relief because I got to tell everybody. I was so happy. I just couldn't quit smiling."

"You still can't quit smiling," Zach added, also grinning from ear to ear.

Since the show was filmed, Whitney has announced that she is expecting a baby girl and they are naming her Kaci Lynn.

Zach and Whitney Bates instagram 1

Zach and Whitney Bates instagram 1

Congrats to the happy couple and growing family!

What did you think of their adorably confusing announcement at Bradley's birthday?

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

bates family slideshow
Image: Bringing Up Bates / Facebook

How I found love on Tinder at 42

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Here’s the thing, though: I was in a pretty good place as far as I was concerned. I was attractive, I owned a beautiful home and made a living as a successful writer. I had two wonderful children, plenty of friends and an abundance of sass. I felt like a catch — and I was! — but dating held as much appeal as those leftovers you find in the back of your fridge that you end up tossing without opening because you won’t be able to unsee what you found inside.

More: My dwarfism made losing my virginity a battle against myself

I had endless conversations with my girlfriends about why I wasn’t looking for a guy. I was happy with my life the way it was. I didn’t want to experience yet another interview-date, wishing I hadn’t worn a firm control shapewear thong while sitting across from a guy who had conveniently left “I have an acute neck tic when I get nervous” out of his dating profile, and man was he nervous that night. But I couldn’t escape the painful truth, no matter how much I fought it — in it crept, like the smoke monster from Lost that never was fully explained: I wanted love. Companionship. Real connection. Intimacy. Commitment. Fine. I wanted a man.

But as I got older, the dating pool had become shallower; figuratively and literally. Where were all of the emotionally available men who were ready for the real thing and not just looking for that recently-separated ego boost? Why did men seem to all be starring in their own janky version of The Bachelor? And not like nice-guy Sean’s season — it was more like dating 100 different Juan Pablos.

The more I dated, the more disenchanted I became; there were the fizzling texts, the one-good-photo guys, the three dates that seemed promising but went nowhere, and the good-on-paper relationships that lacked any real chemistry. It was exhausting! Frankly, I much preferred a night on my couch with a bag of Lay’s and a Real Housewives reunion I’d already watched twice.

More: What dating would be like if The Bachelor was your life (VIDEO)

But coming to terms with my truth — that I did really want to find someone wonderful to share life with — helped me put aside my past disappointments and ultimately led me to love. I forced myself out into the Tinderverse armed with good hair and supportive undergarments with a new goal to date four men in four weeks. I didn’t make it to four because on date number two, I met My Guy; handsome, funny, thoughtful, bright, introspective, strong, communicative, a great listener. He was everything I’d hoped to find. Our chemistry was red-hot from the second we started texting and we’ve been in a ridiculously happy, exclusive relationship like none other I’ve experienced ever since. I’m grateful it took me until I was 42 to find him. Here’s why:

1. The laundry list changes

The list of qualities I want in a man has evolved over time; what I wanted at 30 was different than what I knew I needed at 40. My deal-breakers have changed; no longer did I care whether he made more money than I did, but instead whether his outlook on life was more optimistic than negative. I’ve found that my list is more evolved now than it was in my past, that the things I know I need — and that I know I don’t want — are based on a deeper self-understanding in my 40s than I ever could have had as a younger woman.

2. Appreciation factor: High

Had we met 10 years ago, I wouldn’t be experiencing the level of gratitude that I do now for the man I love. I had to go through the muck and the mire of dating the wrong men and being involved in relationships that ultimately failed, to truly be thankful for the man I met at 42. How would I appreciate everything he is, the fact we can have a great date just hanging out on the couch, the way he makes me laugh or the ease of our communication had I not experienced the opposite of those things before? It’s kind of like shopping for a house; after looking at house after house for months, one finally hits the market that is completely perfect for you.

3. I care less

I care less. About certain things. Like, whether he knows that I have an entire drawer full of SPANX. Or whether there are dishes in my sink when he comes over. Or whether he likes Project Runway or So You Think You Can Dance. I just don’t care about some of the things that mattered much more significantly in my younger years; I’ve found bigger, tastier fish to fry in my 40s.

4. I like me a lot more

In my 30s, I was in a corporate job I didn’t love. I was constantly stressed about my job, about living paycheck-to-paycheck, about whether I’d ever own a home. I was focused on raising my son, on supporting my daughter as she prepared for and started college. I was in a much different place in life, then. These days, I’m self-made. I’m accomplished! There’s an authentic, infectious confidence that’s borne from living life and getting to a place where you’re proud of who you’re becoming, of what you’ve done. And when you’re there, maybe love comes more naturally because you really do love yourself more. You emit that energy, that sense of pride, of self-appreciation, and that has the buy-one-get-one-free effect of being attractive to others, too. Bonus!

5. I’m louder now

Remember when you hadn’t yet found your voice? When you didn’t ask for what you wanted in relationships, whether emotionally, sexually or physically? So many times and in so many relationships, I shrank into myself, ultimately cutting bait and leaving because I just couldn’t get comfortable expressing myself for fear of hurting someone’s feelings: like telling a guy he was becoming too clingy for me, or that his downtown technique could use a little re-jiggering. Maybe I just came into my own later than other women do, but my relationship is so much more fulfilling now that I own who I am, that I respect myself enough to ask for what I want. My grandma Pearl always tells me, "You don’t ask, you don’t get." Wise woman.

So, fret not. Love is there, yours to experience, no matter your age — and not only that, it’s better than you dreamed. Figure out who it is that you’re looking for and get back out there if you’re ready. Get your favorite pics out and get on Tinder. Date! Disregard your disappointments, but know what you want. Be you, genuinely you. Be optimistic.

Oh, and Liza and Geraldine can suck it.

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