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How to become the secret leader in your company

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More: How to make your career dreams a reality

Just the receptionist

Several years ago, a large state agency invited me to conduct a team-building session for its senior management. I got a sinking feeling as I interviewed each manager to learn what they hoped would result from the half day we'd spent together. They were a mess. In fact, they were so disorganized they couldn't arrange a meeting for another three months.

Finally, I got a call from their new receptionist. They'd put her in charge of logistics, so she'd polled them and set a date. As they filed into the meeting room, I immediately noticed a change. As several of the executives arrived, they were talking to one another. Two were laughing at a shared joke.

I started the meeting with a team-building exercise that required the group to work together. When they achieved the goal, they erupted into a mass cheer. I then asked, "So, who was the leader during the exercise?" Everyone looked around, puzzled.

One said, "We didn't actually have a leader."

More: 5 Types of people you find in your workplace jungle

Another said, "We all took turns."

"I disagree," I said. "Here's what I saw. Your receptionist said, 'How about if we all move together?' That's important because if you remain standing in different areas, which is where you started, it's harder to create a group plan."

"Oh, I thought we just kind of got together," one said.

"Then each time one of you had an idea, she said, 'Great idea,' or 'What do the rest of you think?' " I continued, listing four times the receptionist had "led."

"Wow, we didn't even see it!" said one.

"There's more," I said. "Even when you came in the door today, you seemed different. What's been going on?"

One by one, each of them talked about the difference the receptionist had made in the office climate — so much so they invited her to their management session, even though she was 'just the receptionist,' as a thank-you for arranging the logistics and in case they needed her to coordinate with their offices.

The changes the receptionist made in their work lives were subtle. She asked how their projects had gone when they returned from off-site assignments. And she greeted them so warmly one of the managers admitted to walking by her desk several times a day just to receive her genuine, "Hey there, how's it going?"

She tranformed and led them, and they hadn't even noticed.

A voice that matters

Some years ago, I started a newspaper column, offering how-to advice for managers and employees. Six weeks after it debuted, the paper called me and said, “You have fan mail.”

"Can you drop it in the mail?" I asked.

"There's too much," they said. When I got to the newspaper, I found 23 letters, leading to the start of my "Dear Abby of the Workplace" column in which I answer readers' real-life workplace questions with solutions and strategies. The column still runs 34 years later, and I've compiled the "best" challenges and answers into two books.

Each week, "I'm at the end of my rope," and "You've changed my life," reader emails fill my inbox.

Your turn to change the world

Are you a hidden leader? A transformer? What are you going to do, and how? You don't have to have the highest status or be the highest paid. You can make a difference. It's your turn.

More: 4 Strategies to boost your career momentum every day

© 2016, Lynne Curry, author of Solutions and Beating the Workplace Bully and founder of www.workplacecoachblog.com and www.thegrowthcompany.com


Kung pao chickpeas: Turn a favorite Chinese takeout dish vegan

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I love Asian food, but being vegetarian makes it a little difficult from time to time to get takeout. While there are vegetable options, they can be less than interesting and sometimes bland. Here I used chickpeas and gave them lots of flavor by using kung pao sauce, which has a sweet but spicy flavor. Serve these yummy chickpeas over steamed rice, and top with crushed cashews or peanuts for a super-flavorful meat-free dinner.

Kung pao chickpeas
Image: Brandi Bidot/SheKnows

Kung pao chickpeas recipe

Inspired by The Veg Life

Ingredients:

For the chickpea marinade

  • 2 tablespoons reduced-sodium soy sauce
  • 2 tablespoons rice wine vinegar
  • 1 lime, juiced and zested
  • 1 tablespoon agave or honey
  • 1 tablespoon organic coconut oil, melted
  • 1 tablespoon arrowroot powder or cornstarch

For the chickpeas

  • 2 tablespoons organic coconut oil
  • 1 (14.5-ounce) can chickpeas, drained and rinsed
  • 1 cup bottled all-natural kung pao sauce (or homemade)
  • 2 – 3 garlic cloves, minced
  • 1 (1-inch) knob fresh ginger, grated
  • 1/2 teaspoon chili flakes or crushed red pepper

For the garnish

  • 1 small bunch green onions, thinly sliced
  • 1 – 2 spicy red jalapeños or Thai chili peppers
  • Cashews, for garnish (optional)
  • Steamed white rice, for serving

Directions:

  1. In a bowl, combine all the ingredients for the marinade. Add the chickpeas to the marinade, and stir well to coat.
  2. Cover the chickpeas, and allow them to marinate for at least 30 minutes to 1 hour.
  3. To a large pan over medium heat, add the coconut oil, the marinated chickpeas and the remaining ingredients for the chickpeas.
  4. Sauté for about 6 – 8 minutes, until the chickpeas begin to caramelize and brown slightly.
  5. Remove from the heat, and allow the chickpeas to cool slightly.
  6. Serve the warm chickpeas over steamed white rice, and garnish with sliced peppers, cilantro, cashews and green onions.
20 Cauliflower rice recipes for healthy, guilt-free meals
Image: Girl Meets Paleo

More recipes using chickpeas

Tofu with spinach and chickpeas
One-dish beef and chickpea skillet
Sunny Meyer lemon hummus

Updated by Bethany Ramos on 2/3/2016

Courtney Barnett: 10 Facts about this Australian Music Prize nominee

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More: 7 Australian artists to look out for in 2016

Most recently, she made it onto the shortlist for the prestigious Australian Music Prize, and she's an obvious favourite for the win. Among the other nominees in the list of 10 are Tame Impala, Sarah Blasko, Dan Kelly and Jess Ribeiro.

The Australian Music Prize winner will be announced March 9 at a ceremony featuring Henry Rollins, but regardless of whether she takes the award or not, Barnett is becoming a household name. Below are 10 things you should know about her.

1. She is playing Coachella in 2016

Barnett is appearing along with artists like Sia and Guns & Roses, and she's pretty excited about it.

Courtney Barnett Twitter

Courtney Barnett Twitter

2. She may win a Grammy Award this year

Barnett was nominated in the Best New Artist category.

Courtney Barnett Twitter 2

Courtney Barnett Twitter 2

3. She has a girlfriend of four years ...

According to an April 2015 article in Rolling Stone, Barnett is dating singer-songwriter Jen Cloher.

4. ... And the two have a creative collaboration

Their relationship is not just romantic, as the talented pair have reportedly collaborated on a small music label together called Milk! Records — which Barnett founded in her bedroom.

More: 8 Indigenous artists who should be on your playlist

5. She had a normal family life

She was born in Pittwater, near Sydney, where, Rolling Stone notes, she grew up "in the bush." Her mom was a former ballerina, her dad a graphic-designer, and she also has a brother.

6. Music wasn't her first love

It's hard to believe Barnett didn't always think she was going to become a famous musician — although she did start writing songs at an early age — because according to Rolling Stone, she initially wanted to become a fine-art photographer.

7. She went through a tough time

Barnett told the magazine she suffered from clinical depression, which was at its worst around the time she dropped out of the University of Tasmania (where she was studying toward that fine-art photography degree) to head to Melbourne. She said was taking antidepressants during this time.

8. Nirvana had a profound influence on her music

In an interview with Pitchfork, Barnett said, "I grew up listening to Nirvana, and then went through some bad '90s pop stuff — a lot of Australian one-hit wonders. " The second song she ever learned on the guitar, the article notes, was "Come as You Are," which took her "ages" to learn.

Nirvana

Nirvana

More: Coldplay's A Head Full of Dreams tour will be far from an ordinary show

9. Jack White is a fan

White Stripes musician Jack White and Barnett have collaborated on a track called "Boxing Day Blues," as well as a cover of Rowland S. Howard's "Shivers."

10. Before fame, she delivered pizzas

Speaking to USA Today, Barnett revealed she used to play open mics on the weekend and do odd jobs for cash. "I delivered pizzas. That was fun, but it could be punishing: turning up to scary houses in the middle of the night where you could possibly be killed," she said. "Then handing out surveys on trains and annoying jobs where people don't want to talk to you."

She's already achieved so much, but we, for one, are excited to see what the future holds for Barnett.

What your Super Bowl snack choice really says about you

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1. Nachos

From crispy chips to creamy beans, hot, melted cheese to cool sour cream, you know that variety is the spice of life. That's why you're always game for adventure, whether you're going to the opening of a hot new restaurant, traveling to distant corners of the world or challenging yourself to something new. Sure, you have trouble with commitment, and procrastination can be an issue, but with so many exciting things to do and explore, you're not too worried.

2. Buffalo wings

Just like a spicy Buffalo wing, you're not afraid to be bold. You always speak your mind, and everyone knows you add a zing to any social occasion. Sometimes telling it like it is gets you in trouble, but in the end, you know it's always worth it to be yourself no matter what.

More: 25 Over-the-top Super Bowl snacks worth every calorie

3. BBQ wings

Sure, barbecue is messy, but you're the hands-on type anyway. You love working with your hands, whether you're working on renovating the guest bathroom, splitting wood for a cozy fire, making authentic cassoulet from scratch or sketching plans for a new building at your architecture firm. Some people are content to sit behind their computers all day, but you'd rather roll up your sleeves and get dirty.

4. Spinach and artichoke dip

While everyone fights over the game, you're content to sit back and relax. You enjoy the finer things in life, and we're not just talking about a deliciously creamy spinach and artichoke dip. You seek out luxury and comfort wherever you go, and your friends trust your taste in all matters, big or small. You always spring for quality, even if it means patiently saving until you can make a big purchase — or refusing to settle for anything less than the perfect romance.

5. Potato chips and dip

Simplicity is your motto. You don't need something fancy or flashy to be happy — you know that good things come in small packages and that often simplest is best. While your friends and family seem to constantly trip over themselves trying to outdo one another with flashy clothes, cars and vacations, you stick to what makes you happy and don't worry about what others think.

6. Guacamole

You'll be the first to admit it — you love to party. Nothing makes you happier than being surrounded by friends, unencumbered by the commitments of work and home. Sure, you can be responsible when you need to be, and with your networking skills, you totally dominate at the office, but when it's time to let loose, you're always the life of the party. You make a mean margarita too.

7. Buffalo cauliflower wings

Balance is the name of the game, in your humble opinion. You always stick to your beliefs, but you still know how to have fun. Super goal-oriented and compassionate, you probably have a ton of causes you're fired up about, but instead of lecturing, you like to engage people in conversation to find common ground. Once you've found it, though, you're not afraid to show why you have a reputation for being a quick wit and something of a know-it-all.

8. Something healthy you brought from home

Sure, some people call you uptight, but with a track record like yours, it's hard to criticize. Your attention to detail has led you to a successful life, whether that means work, family or both. You're prepared for any situation, and in true moments of crisis, people look to you for a solution. With all those planning skills, you often have a solution before they've even gotten to the root of their problem.

More: Bacon-crusted mac & cheese football is a must-make Super Bowl snack (VIDEO)

9. A little bit of everything

You're the smartest person in any room, and you know it. Why? You're obsessed with obtaining knowledge, whether that means burying your head in a book for hours at a time, educating your palate by trying every food at a party or engaging people in deep and thoughtful conversations. Some are intimidated by you, but they don't need to be — if there's one thing you've learned in your quest for knowledge, it's that everyone has an opinion worth listening to.

33 Chicken wing recipes better than anything you’ll get in a sports bar
Image: Curious Nut

Amy Duggar & Dillon King share video of their romantic engagement

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More: Amy Duggar King's husband Dillon lashes out at online commenters

But in a new joint video interview with People magazine, the couple reveals that their road to marital bliss was far from smooth, and a definite departure from the strict, traditional courtship processes employed by the rest of Duggar's famous clan.

"We met six or seven years ago through mutual friends," King begins, before Duggar interrupts.

"He insulted me," she explains. "That’s how it started. He literally said, ‘Hey, I’m Dillon. What the heck are you wearing?’ So right then, before he even had a chance, he was put in the friend zone."

But before long, the two started deepening their friendship, even though there was a steep learning curve for King when it came to integrating with the famous Duggars.

"I knew nothing about them — absolutely nothing about them," he says. "I did not know their religious beliefs. I didn’t know who they were. I definitely didn’t know how strict they were and how conservative they were. I had never seen the show or anything."

More: Amy Duggar has a lot to say about Josh Duggar, and none of it's good

He continues, "When I first got there, I didn’t know there were certain things you couldn’t say. I didn’t know that if you wear certain clothes, that’s bad too."

Duggar interjects again, laughing, "I wasn’t going to tell you. I was going to let you crash and burn, and you did."

The couple also explains how their friendship started to grow into something more.

"Dillon’s always been around," Duggar explains. "He’s the guy who’s always stuck around no matter what’s happened, no matter what family crisis we had. He was always right there. We didn’t realize that that was love. It took seven years to realize."

More: Amy Duggar may have just responded to those constant pregnancy rumors

For more details, plus sweet footage of the couple's engagement, check out the full video below:

Amy and Dillon explain their courtship

Amy and Dillon explain their courtship

Are you surprised by Amy Duggar's love story?

Mob Wives Big Ang's health worsens: She's diagnosed with brain & lung cancer

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Big Ang is suffering from brain and lung cancer, and now things have gotten so bad that her family has started a GoFundMe account to help pay for a controversial alternative treatment.

According to her sister Janine Detore, Ang's stage 4 cancer stopped responding to the latest round of chemo she started at the beginning of the year, and she is in extreme pain — so the family is now turning to the promise of cannabis oil.

"Chemotherapy was started January 5th. On January 26th the doctor reviewed her CT scan and informed us that the treatment was not working, and in fact one tumor grew larger and the other tumors had no change," Detore explained on the GoFundMe page.

"We were advised that she would start immunotherapy the following week. Well here we are at the emergency room waiting to see why her breathing is labored and the amount of pain she is having is by far more than she could handle. So I suggested cannabis oil as an alternative. This is why I am putting up this go fund me to try to help my sister to get this oil to help her at least be pain free. Angela cannot function to work anymore. I'm not sure that it will work but I'm praying . We all thank you in advance for your prayers & kind wishes. Help Big Ang fight her BIGGEST BATTLE!"

More: 5 Ways Mob Wives proved the ladies are crazier than ever

As of this writing, the page has raised over $20,000 — close to the $25,000 the family says they need for the treatment.

If what Detore claims is true, then Big Ang seriously misled fans last week when she told Radar Online her recent hospital visit was just routine testing and her cancer was still in remission.

Ang underwent surgery to remove a tumor from her throat last April. She had been given a clean bill of health until December, when she was informed that her cancer had returned with a vengeance.

More: Italian group blasts Mob Wives

First Dates: What you need to know about your fave new dating show

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More: Women remind us that online dating profiles don't always reflect real life

While there's only been one episode of the Aussie incarnation thus far, below are 7 things you should know about the show.

First Dates Australia Twiter

First Dates Australia Twiter

1. Dating experts are involved

The way the show works is relatively simple: It takes 10 strangers looking for love (or something else) and has dating experts match their profiles based on their likes and dislikes.

2. There's a link to The Bachelor

First Dates Australia comes to us from Warner Bros. International Television Production, maker of the hit reality TV shows The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, in association with the Seven Network.

3. It started in the U.K.

The show is based on the British version of a love show with the same name, which has aired on Channel 4 since June 2013 (now headed into its fifth season) and become an international success. Unsurprising, really, because who wouldn't want to watch people struggle for things to say and laugh at their awkward silences?

More: Why even small lies on your online dating profile mean big trouble

4. There's no one hovering over the daters' shoulders

During the filming of the date, producers made the decision not to have cameras right in the faces of daters. According to the Sydney Morning Herald, Channel Seven said, "First Dates allows us to observe human behaviour in its purest form. This is a series about people's lives, their stories, the diversity of a country — these factors are played out through the prism of dating and the universal feeling of wanting to love and be loved."

5. There's enough laughter to brighten your day

According to news.com.au, a Channel Seven spokeswoman described the series as "warm, kind and generous and served with a good dollop of humour" — the latter is definitely true! Seriously, you'll be crying from laughing so hard at the hopeful singles' encounters.

First Dates Australia Twitter 2

First Dates Australia Twitter 2

6. It's not scripted

Unlike other reality shows, First Dates Australia doesn't follow a script. Instead, it tries to observe the natural behaviour of people on a first date. "It's not reality television, it's not a competition, it's very much an observational show where real people are going on real first dates," First Dates executive producer Geraldine Orrock said, according to news.com.au.

More: There’s a surprising link between emoji use and your sex life

7. The country is already hooked

It's only taken one episode to excite viewers, as evidenced by the fact that the hashtag #FirstDatesAU is trending and there is a lot of chatter about the show.

Reaction to First Dates AU

Reaction to First Dates AU

Reaction to First Dates AU 2

Reaction to First Dates AU 2

Reaction to First Dates AU 3

Reaction to First Dates AU 3

First Dates Australia

First Dates Australia

The series premiered on the Seven Network on Feb. 3, 2016. Will you be tuning in to the next one?

Rainbow bagels only look like they're made with pixie dust and wishes

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They look magically unreal, like a collaboration between Willy Wonka and a unicorn. But they only look like magic. A new video reveals what goes into these captivating treats, and it's mesmerizing. We could watch owner Scot Rosillo knead this psychedelic bagel dough all day.

rainbow bagels

rainbow bagels

Since I live in Brooklyn, everyone and their sister has been sending me this video via Facebook, and they all have the same questions. Are those things really that bright in real life? And what do they taste like?

More: Rainbow bagels are a colorful alternative to your boring breakfast cereal

Readers, we have answers.

First of all, yes, those colors really are that bright in real life. In fact, the bakery has created two special bagels in honor of the Broncos and the Panthers in their respective colors for the Super Bowl.

Sadly, I haven't tried the bagels myself. Yet. However, SheKnows' photo editor Tiffany Hagler-Geard lives near the bakery and has tried them. She says they're "definitely not for someone who doesn't have a sweet tooth."

More: 15 Bagel sandwiches that will satisfy any craving

They have the usual bagel texture, but with the eggy sweetness of brioche. Hagler-Geard describes the taste as similar to Fruity Pebbles cereal, but not quite so sweet... that is, until you add the topping.

The Bagel Store tops its rainbow bagels with a Funfetti cream cheese made with real cake mix. It's not tart and savory like cream cheese. "It tastes like cereal milk," Hagler-Geard says. But that's not all. You can add a layer of real cotton candy to your rainbow bagel treat. "That takes it to a whole new level," she says.

Yes, the colors in those bagels really are that bright.

More: 19 Insanely expensive snacks we'd like to try if someone else were paying (PHOTOS)


6 Simple ways to get more veggies in your diet

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More: 7 Foods everyone in your family should be eating

What if we focused on what we could include in our daily meal plan instead of worrying about what we have to take out? For example, challenging yourself to add a salad to every dinner or making a goal to start your morning with a smoothie. By using this approach, your eating habits can become a reachable, permanent lifestyle change rather than a phase or "fad diet."

If you focus on working plant-based foods into your eating habits, you may naturally start to crowd out foods that don’t serve the purpose of a healthy weight and body.

1. Replace junk foods and empty calories with plant-based snacks

This is the first step in making a fresh start. Go through the kitchen cabinets and look at the junk foods that sabotage your efforts and have no nutritional value. Replace your chips with kale chips or homemade baked veggie fries, use olive oil instead of canola oil and replace your vanilla ice cream with frozen bananas blended with almond milk. If you can replace at least one thing in your fridge, it should be your high-sodium salad dressings. If you love cooking and want to make your own, I shared some plant-based dressings on my blog, Balanced Babe, that you can whip up in a jiffy! Also, visit your nearest Whole Foods or Trader Joe's to see all the healthy alternatives that are already on shelves!

2. Add at least one extra side of vegetables to each meal

This is the easiest way to ease into eating more plant-based foods while still craving meat and poultry. Make it a goal to have an extra side of veggies or a grain like quinoa with each meal — even breakfast! Let's not be wimpy, either — make the servings a hearty size. By eating the plant-based side before the other foods on your plate, you might realize you can be satisfied without the other additives. Also, when starting out, it helps to prepare the majority of your own meals at home so you aren't tempted to pick not-so-healthy items from the restaurant menu.

More: Eating less meat could help your wallet and the planet

3. Make a checklist of kitchen essentials

Aside from your basics, you want to have the proper kitchen tools to prepare your fresh juice or smoothie. Buy the best blender and/or juicer you can afford. If you're investing in only one, I’d choose the blender. It’s more versatile and can puree soups, blend smoothies and make delicious nut milks. A juicer is very nice, but you most likely won’t use it every day, as it has only one purpose — to make juice. Other essentials, such as a food processor and a salad spinner, are a big help when you want to prep healthy recipes yet save time in your busy schedule.

4. Herbs and spices are the key

Adding flavor to plant-based recipes is so quick and easy when you have herbs and spices on hand, such as: Basil, cumin, ginger/turmeric, mustard, oregano, paprika, rosemary, sage, tarragon and thyme are ones I buy dried. When possible, I like to buy fresh bunches of parsley, cilantro and dill for seasoning. I love using dill in cucumber/yogurt dips, and cabbage and eggplant dishes. Parsley can be added to almost any recipe for added flavor. Cilantro packs a flavorful punch in homemade salsa and salads. There are many others just waiting for you to experiment with in recipes — check them out in your grocer’s aisle.

5. Start experimenting, then be generous

Now that you’ve stocked your pantry and fridge with savory spices and herbs, don’t forget your favorite healthy oils and vinegars. It’s time to play with different veggie and seasoning combinations. Start out with very small portion combinations to see what you like and don’t like. Different combinations can lead to awesome veggie entrées that can be very satisfying. You can get lots of inspiration from browsing plant-based recipe communities such as Pinterest, Tasty Kitchen, Yummy Plants — and, of course, doing a Google search.

Once you’ve started incorporating veggie side dishes with your meals, start making larger quantities. Where does it say you can’t have an entire bunch of sautéed kale for dinner with a side of quinoa and mushrooms? Or a heaping bowl of spinach with chopped beets, apples, pecans and goat cheese? This extra boost of vitamins, minerals and fiber will likely be extremely satisfying. I say the more greens, the better!

6. Keep your healthy snacks readily available

Between meals and when you are on the go, it makes a huge difference having a variety of homemade items available for munching. Some of my favorites are baked sweet-potato chips, roasted chickpeas with garlic and seasoning, sliced apple with walnuts and cinnamon, coconut yogurt with berries and chia seeds, a handful of raw cashews or almonds, avocado with hot sauce, cucumber with hummus or sliced banana with almond butter on a rice cake.

Finding balance is all about incorporating more healthy foods into your daily diet instead of depriving yourself. Go easy when you start out, and be kind to yourself on this new journey. Give it a try for a week to see how it’s working for you. Don’t beat yourself up if you can’t completely cut out meat from your diet. I'd be willing to bet you will have more energy and clarity. You have nothing to lose and lots to gain by adding more plant-based foods to your life!

More: 10 Ways to look for awe in the ordinary

Why I refuse to be the mom in PJs at school drop-off

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I'm not even referring to cute tracksuits bottoms that try to look like pants. I speak of flannels with frog faces splashed across them and plaid bottoms with T-shirts that say, "I woke up like this." I didn't have children back then, but even now, years later, I come across at least five moms each morning who zip their preschoolers into the classroom while wearing PJs tucked into boots. I admire them. They're neon billboards advertising to the world that they are perfect the way they are and have better things to worry about at 8 a.m. on a Tuesday than what jeans they're going to wear.

More21 Diverse children's books that aren't just about "dogs and white boys"

Before I had kids, moms told me I'd be that mom. You'll see, they said. You won't give your clothes or morning routine a second thought. There will be days you'll forget to wash your face.

Never say never, but so far, there hasn't been a morning that has gone by in which I haven't dressed up, cleansed, toned and moisturized my skin and, if I'm feeling saucy that day, applied a layer of lip gloss. I have a closet filled with clothes I love, clothing I most likely won't be wearing when the kids are teens and I can no longer get away with them, so to hell with it, I'm going to dress up now. Every day.

Ball gown at the crack of dawn? You only live once.

More: New 'curvy' Barbie will actually look like our daughters

I don't get dressed for the benefit of other moms or even for my husband, who is already at work by the time I'm ready to take my daughter to school. I want to look presentable because clothing, for me, is like armor. I feel protected and better equipped to face people, make decisions and tackle my work that day when I'm wearing a dress or jeans and a nice blouse or sweater. When I'm wearing pants with an elastic waistband I don't feel the separation between day and night and I don't like how vulnerable I feel showing bank clerks the clothing I wear when I'm having nightmares in bed.

As for my kid's school drop-off, I don't know my child's teacher well enough to invite her to a sleepover at my house, where we would drink wine all night and laugh at crazy kids these day (though she seems cool enough), so why would I want to talk with her about my child's reading progress while dressed in flannel? What if she has bad news? I need to be wearing all black and faux snakeskin boots to deal with something like that.

Pajamas are intimate. Pajamas are second skin. I should probably also mention that all of the PJs I own are really, truly hideous. Like, fleece-pants-with-the-Coca-Cola-logo-all-over-them-and-a-mismatched-aqua-pajama-shirt-with-a-bird-of-paradise-print ugly. I honestly have no idea where some women purchase their adorable pajamas — and if they shelled out more than $10 for them, I don't want to know.

More: 20 Ingenious tricks to get your kids to open up about their school day

My children are so used to seeing me flit in and out of our home office during the day wearing dresses and chandelier earrings and purple eyeshadow that my daughter will demand to know why I'm still wearing my pajamas at 9 a.m. on a Saturday. I don't believe for a second that I'm setting a better example for my kids than parents who wear PJs during the day — that's just silly and to each her own. But I admit that I fondly remember my own mom dropping us off at school in the morning after tossing on a fur coat over jeans and applying dark lipstick, her rumpled pixie haircut the sole sign of cool negligence on her part. She took pride in her appearance and the message I absorbed from it all was that she respected herself and the people she encountered throughout the day enough to put forth her best.

Of course, appearances aren't everything, and if you don't have kind and intelligent words and actions to back them up, you could wear diamonds to drop off the kids and it wouldn't matter. But I want my child's teacher — and everyone else I interact with throughout the day — to feel she is speaking with someone who respects her enough to make the effort.

3 Proven reasons that sex with redheads is simply better

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Whether you love a redhead or you're a redhead yourself, those vibrant tresses can actually translate into a wild bedroom experience.

Redheads are more physically sensitive

The genes responsible for red hair also cause redheads to respond differently to physical stimuli than men or women with other hair colors. Redheads feel hot and cold temperatures more rapidly and respond to pain differently than blonds or brunettes. This heightened sensitivity can easily translate into exciting sexual play with hot and cold lubes, ice cubes and even sex toys that trigger heightened physical responses. With faster and fuller physical responses, many redheads report that it doesn't take much effort to reach the big "o."

In 2012, Danish researchers discovered that redheads' sensitivity may be even more complex — redheads may be tougher than we give them credit for, reacting less to a burning sensation in the skin. You can only imagine what this might translate to in the bedroom.

More: Sex positions for mind-blowing orgasms

Redheads have special pheromones

Redheads exude sexiness from their very pores. In his book The Redheaded Encyclopedia, author Stephen Douglas asserts that redheads have a sweet and musky scent on their skin as a result of pheromone production. These pheromones, in turn, drive would-be suitors absolutely mad with desire. Online forums dedicated to the sexiness of redheads (yes, they exist, and it only takes a quick Google search to find them) further support the claim that redheads smell like sexiness in all the right ways.

And if you're wondering just how special the inner makeup of a redhead really is, the answer is very. In the year 2000, researchers pinpointed the exact gene responsible for red hair, the mutated MC1R protein that may only manifest as fiery locks in as little as 1 to 2 percent of the population.

More: 20 Interesting sex facts everyone should know

Redheads have more sex

As it turns out, the stereotypical lusty redhead isn't too far from the truth. The most compelling argument for hot redheaded sex is the simple fact that gingers have more sex than their blond or brunette counterparts. A University of Hamburg sex researcher found that women with red hair, whether they're single or in a committed relationship, participate in substantially more sexual activity than other women. If they're hitting the sheets all the time, it's bound to be pretty hot, right?

It doesn't hurt that redheads have the highest orgasm rate of all hair types at 41 percent.

More: 6 Ways to use heat during sex that have nothing to do with candles

Redheads have a reputation for eroticism

We're all familiar with the stereotype of the hot-tempered redhead. Some theorists purport that redheads are emotional and volatile because of their heightened sensitivity to pain and other physical stimuli. A redhead's reputation for being passionate and opinionated can certainly pay dividends when it comes to sex, and there's some research to support the sexy redhead concept, too. Red has long been known to be the color of arousal. Think red lipstick, red wine and naturally red hair, and you're on the right track.

A passionate lover is always a fabulous thing, especially when he or she knows how to say loudly and convincingly, "Touch me there!"

Updated by Bethany Ramos on 2/3/2016

Strawberry brownie s'mores skewers are a good excuse to eat more Nutella

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I like to use these short skewers for desserts like this because they make the perfect single-serving treat. However, if you want to use longer skewers, just double or triple up the fillings, and serve them drizzled with all the Nutella you desire. (Which, if you're me, is the whole container.)

strawberry brownie s'more skewer drizzled with nutella
Image: Brandy O'Neill/SheKnows

Strawberry brownie s'mores skewers recipe

Yields 10 small skewers

Prep time: 15 minutes | Cook time: 20 minutes | Total time: 35 minutes

Ingredients:

For the brownies

  • 1/2 cup butter
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1/4 cup cocoa powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 2 large eggs
  • 1/2 cup white whole-wheat flour
  • 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/4 teaspoon kosher salt

For the skewers

  • 1 (8 x 8-inch) pan brownies, cut into 10 (2-inch) hearts
  • 10 large marshmallows, lightly toasted
  • 5 strawberries, cut in half
  • 10 small skewers, 3 – 4 inches long
  • 1/3 cup Nutella, warmed in the microwave until melted

Directions:

For the brownies

  1. Heat the oven to 350 degrees F, and spray an 8 x 8-inch pan with nonstick cooking spray.
  2. In a medium-size skillet, melt the butter over low heat. Once it's melted, remove from the heat, and stir in the sugar, cocoa powder and vanilla extract. Stir together to combine.
  3. The mixture should not be hot, so add in the eggs, and stir to combine.
  4. Add in the remaining ingredients, and stir just until combined.
  5. Add the batter to the prepared baking dish, and bake for about 20 minutes or until the brownies are set around the edges and slightly soft in the middle.
  6. When the brownies are cool, cut out 2-inch hearts with a heart-shaped cookie cutter.

For the skewers

  1. Add 1 heart-shaped brownie, 1 toasted marshmallow and 1 strawberry half to each skewer.
  2. Drizzle with Nutella, and serve.

More brownie recipes

Irish car bomb brownies
Low-carb brownie skillet
Almond Joy brownies

Brooks Ayers is trying to start drama about Vicki Gunvalson’s new man

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Gunvalson has a new man in her life, Arizona-based construction supervisor Jack Losey, and by the looks of things the couple is quite cozy together — but Gunvalson's ex-boyfriend Brooks Ayers says things are not nearly as innocent as they seem.

In fact, he heavily implies that Gunvalson was cheating on him with Losey, echoing rumors that she was cheating on her ex-husband with Ayers himself.

More: Brooks Ayers threatens to reveal The Real Housewives of Orange County dirty laundry in tell-all book

It was all revealed in a single tweet from Ayers.

Brooks says Vicki was cheating

Brooks says Vicki was cheating

More: Vicki Gunvalson has been showing off her new man very publicly (PHOTOS) 

Gunvalson has said she and Losey have known each other since 2011, so Ayers does at least have the fact that they knew each other during the relationship and their time on The Real Housewives of Orange County to back up his claim.

That date also falls within the time she was married to Donn Gunvalson. While she filed for divorce in 2010, it was not finalized until 2014. OK! magazine heavily implies she was dating Losey during this period — a charge she denied on Twitter yesterday.

More: Vicki Gunvalson's family wants Brooks Ayers to face major consequences

Vicki Gunvalson denies cheating

Vicki Gunvalson denies cheating

More: RHOC's Vicki Gunvalson and Brooks Ayers still have two alarmingly different stories

Regardless of how long Gunvalson has known Losey and when they started dating, Ayers accusing anyone of deception is rather rich, considering his cancer scandal.

In fact, even Bravo's Andy Cohen has major doubts about Ayers' continual insistence that he has cancer, despite being caught faking medical records.

"I still haven't seen anything that says he has it and haven't seen anything that says he doesn't have it," Cohen told OK! magazine. "It just seems like it would have been so easy to shut down."

Instead, Ayers is spending his time trying to shoot down Gunvalson's reputation. Doesn't make much sense.

Real Housewives slideshow

7 Reasons I love being the 'oldest mom on the block'

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I can think of a few things that suck about being the older mom: awkward interactions with millennial moms, being mistaken for Grandma instead of Mommy, and having to stretch out my back before attempting to bend over the tub to wash my kids’ hair. But the good far outweighs the bad.

Here are seven things that rock about being an older mom:

1. More confidence

I spent my 20s and a good part of my 30s trying to figure out who I was. While I firmly believe everyone is a work in progress, at 49 I know exactly who I am and what my strengths and weaknesses are. I’ve had to grow into my self-confidence — but the fact that I’m less likely to second-guess myself makes me a better mom.

2. Less stressing about little things

My house is dirty. My kid probably has his underpants on backwards. I may have sent him to school without going through his backpack from the day before. The world won’t stop spinning. I’ve lived enough life to know that little things may seem like big things in the moment, but they probably aren’t even a blip on the radar of what’s important in the long run. I ask myself if an immediate annoyance or stressor will matter in one year or five years. If the answer is no, I don’t waste time worrying about it.

More: The letter my pre-mom self really could have used

3. Not easily intimidated

I know the mama bear instinct doesn’t observe the boundaries of age, but when dealing with teachers, coaches, other parents, healthcare providers and that crazy lady who keeps trying to guilt me into doing PTA stuff, knowing how to stand my ground has served me well. I don’t accept the status quo and I’m quick to raise the B.S. flag if a situation calls for it.

4. My kids keep me young

Maybe this sounds cliché, but it’s true. It’s hard to have the mindset of a middle-aged woman when you’re chasing little kids around. And yes, I realize I have the back and joints of a middle-aged woman when I’m running after my kids — but that’s another story. I don’t feel old and my kids take the credit for that. Attitude is everything, right?

5. Financial security

My husband and I had both finished school and were well-established in our professional careers when our boys came along. We’re not rich by anyone’s definition, but the days of eating baloney until payday are gone. Money doesn’t make you a good parent; but the absence of ever-present stress over where grocery money is going to come from allows me to focus more on enjoying motherhood.

More: Your unborn baby can now listen to music through your vagina

6. Major screw-ups are in the past

I did a lot of stupid things as a young adult. I made bad choices: career, relationships, money, you name it. If I seem to be good at adulting, it’s because I’ve screwed everything up at least once. I’m not suggesting I know everything now and that I’ll never stumble again, but I know my kids are getting a better me than they would have 20 years ago. They’re getting a more tired me whose knees pop and crack a lot, but overall, a better me.

7. I don’t take time for granted

I’m almost 50. My kids are almost 6. I’m in great health, and people today live longer than ever. But I also know that numbers aren’t in my favor. If my son waits until he’s 35 to start a family, that will make me 78 when I get to hold my first grandchild. I’ll be 96 on that kid’s eighteenth birthday. Possible? Certainly. Likely? Who knows? Something to take for granted? No way.

My children are a gift and yes, I might lose perspective when I’m nudged awake at 2 a.m. because someone thinks he saw a closet monster and I desperately need my freaking sleep, but these days are precious and I realize how lucky I am to have these moments.

MoreWhy I refuse to be the mom in PJs at school drop-off

I think being a mom rocks, period, no matter how old or young you are. But there are definitely some advantages to being that “mature parent.” My ego just has to get a little tougher so I don’t spend an hour crying in my ice cream when someone asks if I’m the grandma.

Teresa Giudice's former cellmate gives scary warning about her memoir

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More: Teresa Giudice throws birthday party while under house arrest (PHOTO)

The Real Housewives of New Jersey star Giudice plans to capitalize on the time she was forced to spend behind bars by releasing a tell-all memoir about the experience. The book, titled Turning the Tables: From Housewife to Inmate and Back Again, is set for a release next week. But could the book get her into more trouble than her fraud and conspiracy charges ever did?

According to Giudice's former cellmate, Deseree Bradshaw, that may be the case. In an interview with In Touch Weekly, Bradshaw revealed why releasing the memoir could land Giudice in more trouble than she's ever been in before.

"She’s going to have enemies for talking about that," Bradshaw revealed, referencing passages in the book in which Giudice describes sexual relationships that occurred between inmates in the all-women prison, even going so far as to reveal that her own cell was nicknamed the "Boom Boom Room" because it was where inmates hooked up.

More: Teresa Giudice reveals her prison cell's shocking nickname

"A lot of women have husbands and boyfriends on the outside, and they don’t want what they did on the inside to get out. It’s not right," Bradshaw continued. "People don’t like being talked about. Even if she doesn’t name names, we’ll know who she’s talking about, and those people will be upset."

According to former inmate and prison consultant Larry Levine, Bradshaw's warning could be legitimate.

"If she names names or even so much as provides any identifying features about the women, there’s no saying what could happen to her," Levine explained to In Touch. "They have friends on the outside who could threaten her, harass her, attack her or, worse, put a bullet in her head."

More: Teresa Giudice's memoir will describe her emotional last night at home

Do you plan to read Teresa Giudice's memoir?


7 Summer-themed products that will make you forget it's winter

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With a few beauty adjustments, you can turn your bathroom into a beach-themed spa. Why not? It's February, and you deserve a little sun in your life — even if it's from self-tanner. Try these seven products if you want to be (or at least feel like) a bronzed goddess all winter long.

summer beauty
Image: Gabriela Arellano/SheKnows

1. Temporary tattoos

Lulu DK Pop Tats
Image: Lulu DK

Nothing says "June fling" like a temporary tat of a gold feather. It may be hiding under your sweater — for now — but you'll still know it's there. (Lulu DK, $10)

2. In-shower gradual tan

St. Tropez In Shower Gradual Tan
Image: St. Tropez

What pairs better with a temporary tattoo than golden skin? Devote three minutes (yep!) to getting bronzed in your next shower. The formulation works off your existing skin tone, so you'll have a natural glow that deepens the longer you use it. (St. Tropez, $25)

3. Your favorite summer perfume

Vince Camuto Capri
Image: Vince Camuto

Inspired by a Mediterranean breeze, this fruity-floral fragrance has notes of pear, violet and vanilla. Keep it on your desk, and spritz yourself for a reminder that spring (and your next vacation) is nearer than you think. (Vince Camuto, $82)

4. Creamy eye treatment with avocado

Kiehl's Creamy Eye Treatment with Avocado
Image: Kiehl's

There's never a wrong time of year for avocado, and this cult favorite eye cream provides the extra moisture we desperately need during the colder months. We have a feeling you'll already be on jar two come spring. (Kiehl's, $47)

5. A spa treatment in a bag

Kona Body
Image: Kona Body

Treat yourself to a spa day straight from Hawaii with this body scrub made with coconut, coffee and Himalayan pink salt. The natural exfoliants will leave you smooth and, well, Netflix ready. (Kona Body, $15)

6. Proganix Quench shampoo and conditioner (complete with electrolytes)

Proganix Quench Shampoo & Conditioner
Image: Ulta

Nourish your hair with moisturizing coconut and electrolytes (yep, they do to your hair what they do to you on a Saturday morning). In addition to replenishing your dry, winter hair, the line is sulfate-free and made with beachy ingredients, from coconut to aloe. (Ulta, $10)

7. Sea salt pop candle

Jonathan Adler Sea Salt Pop Candle
Image: Jonathan Adler

There's no shame in literally bringing the beach to you, and Jonathan Adler knows just how to do subtle while still sending just the right cozy beach house vibes. With notes like "water hyacinth" and "blue lotus," this candle is nicer than your summer share is going to be anyway. (Jonathan Adler, $38)

9 ways Pride and Prejudice and Zombies is far better than the classic

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Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Image: Sony

1. The Bennet sisters trained for battle, not a knitting circle

Just like in the novel Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, the Bennet girls are trained in the finer things like embroidery, piano and dance. But in this version of the story, where the threat of a zombie attack is around every corner, the girls are also trained in the art of battle. Elizabeth Bennet (Lily James, Cinderella), can wield a knife for a lot more than slicing a lamb shank.

More: Cinderella: The glass slippers are actually a sexual metaphor

2. The sisters learned Shaolin Kung Fu in China

Though the Darcys and other wealthier families of the Regency period sent their daughters to learn combat in Japan, the Bennets could only afford to send their daughters to China, where meals and accommodations were less expensive. But not to worry — while there, the sisters studied the ancient form of martial arts called Shaolin Kung Fu, learned sword fighting and how to fire a pistol.

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Image: Sony

3. A new look at class oppression and British imperialism

One thing we love about the novel is how well it shows a highly stratified society burdened with prejudice and pride. But in the film, a new consequence is shown when you add imperialism into the mix. Britain's great explorers and businessmen have gone out to conquer other lands but have brought back this plague of zombies as a result. Zombies become the symbol of the lower class, who resort to eating each other's brains to survive in this world ruled by the wealthy.

4. Elizabeth is able to express her true feelings

Women of that period were taught not to express their feelings and desires and to instead repress them. Here, armed with a sword and an expert knowledge of combat, Elizabeth has no reason to act like a shrinking violet. Finally, she is empowered, and it's exciting to watch her speak her mind and hold her own with the men.

MoreLily James admits to a liquid diet for Cinderella, but it wasn't her choice

5. The reinvention of Lady Catherine de Bourgh

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Image: Sony

Here, Lady Catherine de Bourgh is delightfully played by Lena Headey (Game of Thrones), with an eye patch to convey her tough-as-nails image. In the book, it's impressive that Elizabeth is eventually able to win Lady de Bourgh's approval, but in this movie, it is an enormous feat, considering de Bourgh's robust constitution.

6. The real reasons Mr. Darcy has a falling out with Mr. Wickham

Though we don't want to give too much away, it's Mr. Wickham (Boardwalk Empire's Jack Huston) who has a secret connection to the zombie apocalypse, and that's why Mr. Darcy (Sam Riley) is angry with him.

7. Dr. Who's Matt Smith is hilarious as Parson Collins

Matt Smith
Image: Sony

With his goofy expression and superb comedic timing, Smith nearly steals the entire movie. Typically, an audience would be annoyed by Collins' doltish tactics, but here, we can't wait for him to get back on screen.

8. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies crosses two genres

Everyone loves a good romantic film, and if you can add zombies and horror into the mix, why not? This film is successful at both, fulfilling both the romantic and horror genres in exciting new ways we've never seen before.

More: The genius behind Daniel Radcliffe's 'immature,' fart-filled Swiss Army Man

9. It sets up a prequel: Elizabeth Bennet in China

Though we don't get to see any of Elizabeth's training in China, we sure would like to! How fun would it be to see the beautiful and clever Bennet sisters making their way through China and learning the ancient art of combat? We can only dream about a film possibly called Pride and Prejudice and Pandas.

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies opens Feb. 5.

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

Céline Dion shares touching tribute to her late husband in Las Vegas

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The memorial was fittingly held at the Colosseum at Caesars Palace, the performance venue where his wife Céline Dion has spent the past few years performing. According to Entertainment Tonight, Dion teared up as she shared memories of her late husband, the "love of her life." Dion herself chose not to sing at the event, instead giving a 20-minute speech devoted to her late husband. She told friends she can "still feel his strength and his warmth."

More: Céline Dion's children speak out following the funeral of René Angélil

"Let me start by saying good evening, good friends. René, the love of my life, would be so happy to know we are here together. I feel the love in this room," she said. "René never hated anyone. Is it possible someone loves everybody? I don't think so. But he never told me a person he disliked… Time was precious to him. He loved life so much, so very much.

"I was never part of any of the meetings that he had where he had to say yes or no. He protected me from day one to the rest of my life, I am pretty sure of that," she recounted.

More: Céline Dion is about to get hit with another heartbreaking tragedy

Music producer David Foster continued the tribute with a rendition of "The Colour of my Love," the same song he played at the couple's 1994 wedding. Angélil died on Jan. 14, just two days before Dion's brother Daniel also passed away of cancer.

More: Céline Dion shares sweet throwback before René Angélil's funeral (PHOTO)

7 Things you need to fulfill your resolution to run a marathon

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1. A Good Pair of Sneakers

A lot of people say running is the cheapest form of exercise that you can do because all you need is a pair of shoes,” says Claire Shorenstein, a New York City-based registered dietician and running coach. While Shorenstein goes on to admit that running can get more expensive depending on what kinds of gadgets, gear and nutrition you require, and whether or not you choose to hire a coach, a comfortable pair of shoes is a necessity.

2. A Training Plan

You know that saying, ‘Failing to prepare is preparing to fail’? Well, it’s kind of true, especially when it comes to running a marathon. Finding a training plan that works with your schedule is a priority. Unfortunately, when it comes to 26.2 miles, ‘winging it’ isn’t an option. There are plenty of training plans available online through websites like Runner’s World, or you can buy one from a running coach. “An experienced coach can design a plan with key training strategies such as progressive overload, rest days hydration and fueling,” says Marnie Kunza, a certified running coach.

A training plan doesn’t just apply to mileage — you’ll need a nutrition strategy, too. “A lot of people focus all their energy on the training plan and don’t think twice about their nutrition plan,” Shorenstein says. “As a dietician and running coach, if you don’t address both, you’ll set yourself up for failure.”

3. An Accountability Buddy (or Coach)

Kunz recommends beginner runners hire a coach (or at the very least follow a training plan created by a professional running coach). “An experienced coach can design a plan with key training strategies such as progressive overload, rest days, hydration and fueling.”

Don’t have the funds for a coach, or just don’t like paying someone else to tell you what to do? That’s fine — but you still need some form of support. “If you’re taking on the task of training for a marathon, it’s daunting and challenging.” Shorenstein says. “You need some type of support from another experienced runner, whether it comes from a significant other, friends, a team, or a coach. It’s super important to have someone guide you through questions and any issues that might come up. Plus, it adds a level of accountability.”.

4. A Way To Track Your Mileage

In order to run 18 miles, you need to actually know a route that is 18 miles long. That’s where a GPS watch comes in. If you can splurge, Kunz recommends the Garmin Forerunner 220, an GPS watch that offers advanced features such as a high-resolution, color display, interval workouts and other training programs from Garmin. “For beginning runners, a more basic GPS watch — like the Garmin Forerunner 10 — will be all you need to stay on track with your mileage,” Kunz says.

Trying not to overspend? Free services like MapMyRun can help you map out routes and record mileage.

5. Apparel that doesn't chafe

You don’t need to be shopping at Lululemon or spending a ton on fancy apparel and high-tech gear, but you do need clothes that fit comfortably — and most importantly, clothes that don’t chafe, Shorenstein says. Technical apparel and sweat-wicking material can help you stay dry and comfortable during long runs. Anything extra gear like hydration belts, arm bands, athletic headphones, backpacks, or safety measures like the Night Runner 270 is totally up to you.

6. An Awesome Playlist

To pump yourself up during long runs, you need awesome music. Check out Spotify’s list of the best running songs from 2015 to help you make your playlist. Once you know how long your runs will take you, you can even create them exactly to the length you'll need and plan certain songs to come on at the mile markers you know you'll need the extra motivation (something you'll want to keep in mind for marathon day).

7. The Right Attitude

You’re probably already an ambitious person — you signed up for a marathon, after all. However, the road to 26.2 miles is a long one, and you're bound to have some setbacks along the way. Make a list of all the reasons you want to achieve this particular goal and keep track of the progress you make. Refer to this list whenever you've had a bad training day, or are simply down in the dumps. You can also turn to your accountability buddy during this time. When it gets hard, just remember why you started, and how far you've come already.

Ready to run? Cheers to 26.2 in 2016!

The ultimate Super Bowl guide for people who know nothing about football

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1. Who's playing?

The Carolina Panthers are playing the Denver Broncos. Boom.

2. Is that interesting?

Yup! The Panthers lost a lot of good players to injuries this season and have been more or less carried to the Super Bowl by their young and hugely talented quarterback, Cam Newton, who is trying to win his first championship. The Broncos, meanwhile, have future Hall of Fame quarterback Peyton Manning. Manning is 39 years old, which is right at the upper limit for a quarterback. He has one Super Bowl ring but will likely be retiring after this season and is hoping to go out with a second. See? Interesting!

3. What the heck is the goal here? Can a gal get an overview?

When I first started watching football with my dad when I was a kid, I thought football was men running into each other, moving a few feet and doing it again.

That's basically true. What you have when the guys line up on the field is the defense of one team versus the offense of another. The offense gets four tries (or "downs") to go 10 yards. They will do that by either having the quarterback throw the ball or having him hand off the ball to the running back to see how far he can run with it. If they get 10 yards on any of those downs, they start again with a first down and four more chances. The goal is to move the ball along the field by getting down after down until they are able to get it in the end zone for a touchdown.

If the offense doesn't get their 10 yards within four downs, then the teams switch — that offense leaves the field and their defense comes on to play the other team's offense.

All together, the game goes for four quarters of 15 minutes each, for a total of an hour of game time in the world of pretend. In reality, these one-hour games can last up to three hours. So many chips.

More: What your Super Bowl snack choice really says about you

4. What about points?

The two most common ways to score are with a touchdown, worth six points, and a field goal, worth three. Field goals (when the kicker tries to get the ball through the goalposts — often called the "uprights") are typically used when the offense doesn't think it can score a touchdown but have managed to move the ball far enough downfield to be within field-goal range, which is basically the point where their kicker has a shot at making the points.

Immediately after a touchdown, the offense has two options for scoring additional points: the extra point or the two-point conversion. The extra point is the one teams choose most often. This is when the kicker tries to aim the ball through the uprights. If he does, the offense gets one point, for a total of seven on that score. A two-point conversion, on the other hand, is basically like trying to score another touchdown, except there's only one chance and they're only a few yards from the opponent's goal line. If they succeed, they're up a total of eight points. Because math.

There's also something called a safety, which is worth two points, but I'll skip that, as they are both not that common and hard to explain and understand. If your team gets one, just cheer and grab another chip.

5. A quick and broad breakdown of offensive positions:

Quarterback: dude throwing the ball.

Center: dude who gives the ball to the QB.

Offensive line: the enormous gentlemen trying to protect the quarterback so he can throw.

Receivers: the guys running down the field trying to catch the ball thrown by the QB.

Running back: If the QB, instead of throwing the ball, hands it off to a guy who is built like a tank and tries to run through a pile of 300-pound men, that tank is the running back.

More: Super Bowl Bingo gets you in on a little competition, too

6. A quick and broad breakdown of defensive positions:

Defensive line: Enormous men, some of whom are remarkably agile, trying to either sack the quarterback or stop the running back. (A sack is when the QB is taken to the ground while he still has possession of the ball.)

Middle linebacker: the quarterback of the defense — you may see this guy behind the defensive line, yelling and pointing at things. He gets the defense set up against whatever play the offense is going to try to run.

Corners: Guys paired up with the receivers to try to prevent them from catching the ball.

Safeties: The last line of defense. There's the strong safety, who is usually patrolling the "strong" side of the field (the side where the offense has lined up its tight end — don't worry about it. Chip, please), and the free safety, who may be so far back he doesn't even show up on your TV screen. His job is to follow the ball and go where it goes. He's the last stop against the offense.

7. What are "special teams"?

There's offense, defense and special teams. The guys on special teams are the ones who play during kickoff, punt returns, field goals — all kicking plays. Usually your star players aren't on special teams because no one wants, say, Broncos receiver Demaryius Thomas getting hurt returning a kick when they could be using him to score a touchdown. Special teams players are highly skilled and can make a difference in the outcome of the game.

More: 16 Amazing women who have torn down barriers in the wide world of sports

8. So if my team is up 21–3 at the start of the fourth quarter, we're golden, right?

Ha! You'd like to think so, but in football, most games aren't over till the last second is off the clock.

Let me tell you a little story about a Seahawks fan named Meredith Bland. Last season, she was watching the NFC championship game between her Seahawks and the Panthers, and she was feeling sad. You see, her team was down 19–7 with four minutes left to go. It looked bleak. But then a series of miracles happened, and the Seahawks won 28–22. The lessons: Never give up, and never get comfortable. Man, is this a great game?

Have a great Super Bowl!

Super Bowl events slideshow
Image: WENN
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