You see, Anna Todd isn't much of a writer. Not only is she lacking in style, she has little imagination, and her prose makes me want to move to a cabin in the woods because if After is getting picked up by Simon & Schuster (and Paramount Pictures), the apocalypse is upon us and fire will soon rain from the sky.

Harry Styles fan fiction gets the Fifty Shades of Grey treatment

I have nothing against Wattpad. Wattpad, for all appearances, seems to be awesome. It's an online platform where writers can post short stories and novels, chapter by chapter. It's a safe place to find people who share your passion for vampires or smut or, in Anna Todd's case, the band One Direction.

That's how this whole After nightmare first began: as One Direction fan fiction, starring member of the band Harry Styles. Let me tell you the plot, because I know you're clawing your eyes out by now, dying to hear what kind of brilliant storyline would earn such a rabid fan base.

Tessa is an annoyingly naïve virgin who's never had a touch of alcohol in her life. She heads off to college, where she meets stereotypical bad girl roomie Steph. We know Steph is bad because she has... tattoos. (Not tattoos!) Steph is friends with all sorts of party animals, including Harry.

The internet is turning our kids into terrible writers

Now, here's where it gets really original: Harry has tattoos, too, and he's a total sarcastic jerk who Tessa feels mysteriously drawn to. Oh, and he's British, like his namesake. But as we find out, Harry likes to read, which makes him totally deep or something. Author Todd even fits in the obligatory "I bet you like Mr. Darcy" conversation, because there aren't enough Darcy references in the world.

After is being called a more innocent version of Fifty Shades, which makes me grind my teeth to nubs because Fifty Shades was atrocious enough. If it weren't for the sex scenes in Fifty Shades, the book would have been nothing but the constant nagging of an insecure idiot (which should be the tagline for After).

The dialogue is stilted, like some high schooler decided to write an after-school special about the drama, drama, drama of drinking vodka. Literally, lines like "Hey, Tessa, how was your day?" appear in brain-melting abundance, as well as references to Tessa's parts "down there."

One Direction spends time looking at each other's privates

Even worse, perhaps, than the writing and unoriginal storyline are the comments from the masses who find After so dang brilliant. Most of the comments are barely legible, so repugnant is the grammar and punctuation. No wonder these readers are hypnotized by the flat characters and mundane conflict of Ms. Todd's literary disaster.

But Simon & Schuster? Paramount? What in God's name are they thinking? If this is the crap that passes for literature in 2014, we might as well give up hope. We have become the film Idiocracy, where only the dumb people procreate, watering down our gene pool to the shallow level of pond scum.

If After is evidence of anything, it is that smart people have become the exception. Soon, we will be hunted down by drooling Anna Todd fans with pitchforks and burned as witches.

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If you're still trying to recovering from the brutal beating that Jake took in the latest episode of Scandal, we're here to help. Sit back with a cup of coffee and clear your mind of all the bad things by reminding yourself of all the ways that Jake is one amazing man.

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1. He takes a licking but keeps on ticking

He's been locked up in a pit and tortured by Olivia's father and now soundly beaten by her other lover, and yet Jake always seems to get back up.

2. He's not afraid of the most powerful man on earth

To everyone else, the president is a man not to be trifled with. But to Jake, he's just an old friend who also sleeps with his girlfriend, and Jake is never afraid to stand up to him.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

3. He protects the ones he loves

If Jake was your boyfriend, you'd never have to worry about anything ever again. You could sleep peacefully knowing that he'd kill anything and anyone who ever tried to hurt you.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

4. He's not afraid of anything

Seriously, have you ever once seen the man afraid? Maybe he's shown concern over Olivia when she was in danger, but fear has never shown in his eyes.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

5. He doesn't back down to anyone

Whether it's the president or the father of his girlfriend (who also happens to be the leader of the organization that put him in a hole for months), Jake doesn't ever let anyone intimidate him.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

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6. He's sexy as all hell

Have you seen the man with his shirt off? Case closed.

GIF credit: Buzzfeed

7. He's a fantastic kisser

Admit it, you know you've watched him kiss Olivia and wished you were in her shoes.

8. He's into sports

Sure, we've only seen him play basketball against Fitz, but we're confident Jake is great at any sport he picks up.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

9. He's loyal

Once Jake gives you his loyalty, that's it. The only way you can lose it is if you are a heinous person (Command, we're looking at you) who deserves to lose it.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

10. He's a badass

Jake knows everything there is to know about combat and can whip just about anyone's butt. He's also a cold-blooded killer — but only when he needs to be.

GIF credit: Buzzfeed

11. He's kindhearted

Remember that time Jake shot James, but then sat with him until he died, reassuring the poor guy that he wasn't alone and his daughter would be safe? That's called heart, and Jake has it in spades.

12. He's funny

With all the terrible things Jake has had to do, he still manages to make us laugh with his wry sense of humor. He really is the whole package.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

It was all about the gay sex during last night's Shondaland

13. He'll take you away to an island

Jake didn't hesitate to go with Olivia to her island escape when she needed it, and we have no doubt he would have stayed with her forever. That's a great guy, right there.

Most notably, children and teens have taken to selling their prescription Adderall for cold, hard cash. Win-win, right? A broke teen gets a little money in his pocket, and, in exchange, a friend gets his hands on a cool upper that helps him study. What could possibly go wrong?

A lot, actually. Adderall is a stimulant med derived from amphetamine — also known as the street drug speed — and it's dangerous for teens to take without a prescription and monitoring. It's sometimes even deadly. ADHD expert Dr. Edward Hallowell explained, "When it's taken properly, it's not a dangerous street drug, but rather an effective way of helping children and adults with ADHD focus their minds and control their impulses. Used improperly, though, it's dangerous."

Teenage Adderall abuse isn't exactly new. I remember hearing classmates discuss their Adderall drug ring like a bunch of idiots when I was in college 10 years ago. The concern is that Adderall abuse has picked up steam in recent years, and is a bigger problem than many parents can imagine. "The numbers aren't completely certain, but millions of children are prescribed Adderall or another similar substance each year," Hallowell said. He added that more children are diagnosed with ADHD than ever before, and increased diagnoses go hand in hand with increased Adderall prescriptions. That means that more children and teens are taking Adderall, and more are willing to sell it to friends. In fact, a recent National Institutes of Health study found that 31 percent of college students used the drug without a prescription during their college years. The most common dealer? A friend with an Adderall prescription.

I'll admit that I had no idea Adderall abuse was so widespread before hearing these statistics. Since knowledge is power, though, I plan to discuss prescription drug rings with my daughter when she approaches school age. Hallowell reported that a frank discussion with your kids is one of the best preventative efforts parents can take, anyway. "Have a conversation with your children before they head off to school," he said. "Encourage them to tell friends who ask to share their medications that Adderall can be dangerous and they don't feel comfortable sharing." Hallowell also suggested only giving your child a week's supply at one time.

If you suspect that your child is either buying or selling Adderall, you must act quickly. "Enlist the help of a child psychiatrist or other trusted adviser," Hallowell concluded. "There are serious dangers from the misuse of these medications. Do not rest until you know the situation is well in hand."

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Nightcrawler made Jake Gyllenhaal slim down in an unhealthy way

"I mean, you hope that a movie's going to be good, but really it's about the process for me." Gyllenhaal shared when we asked him if he was surprised by the Oscar buzz for his role in this film as news stringer Lou Bloom. "I really get off on the preparation part. Even more than the performance part."

Clearly Gyllenhaal's preparation is paying off in big ways. This is a character not like any we've ever seen play him before. Aside from losing weight and creeping out his appearance, the actor also says it was mentally transformative.

"Spending as much time in the mindset of someone like Lou and really, when I start losing weight and I started staying up at night and stuff, just chemically, it's a very interesting shift in your mind. I wouldn't say it was hard or anything — or even really challenging — I would just say it was so different from how my mind works then. I was in a different mindset. You become unaware of, you know, your emotional responses to things, and they seem normal and they're not. It's like that kind of stuff. But it translates into a character, and I think that it was an incredible journey."

4 Times Jake Gyllenhaal gives us the creeps in the Nightcrawler trailer

Gyllenhaal's co-star in the film, Rene Russo, said that she was awed by Gyllenhaal's performance as well, though she didn't find him as creepy because she "knew where things were going, and I'd read the script, and I saw the preparation."

"Had I not seen all that and worked on it, then I'm sure it would be very different," Russo told us, "just for it to come at you fresh."

Photo credit: Open Road

Gyllenhaal shared that he additionally prepped for the role by shadowing two stringers around Los Angeles.

"I had done this movie End of Watch, like, a few years ago, and I was with police officers on the street pretty much four or five nights a week for five months. And, you know, went to many, many crime scenes and many accident scenes, and while I was researching that, there were stringers when I was with the police officers, there were stringers there too. So it was strange," Gyllenhaal explained

Still, the role didn't really make him sympathize with the paparazzi, despite following police officers around like photographers follow celebrities. Gyllenhaal still thinks it's different.

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"Well, I mean, I would separate the profession of people who, sort of, follow around somebody who is known or something and the thing that Lou does. He's dealing with life and death. Do you know what I mean?"

As we said in the interview, Lou is definitely an extreme. The character Gyllenhaal creates will stay in your head long after you leave the theater — along with some big questions about the society we live in.

"It just all exists on the same plane," Gyllenhaal said of media these days. "You can go to the web page of anything and you can find, like, the State of the Union alongside, like, a video of a cat falling off of a four story building and surviving."

He continued, "That's where it's sort of a comment on society. And that mentality is what feeds a character like Lou and allows him to thrive. I think that's what was fascinating to me."

Nightcrawler opens in theaters Oct. 31. You can check out the full interview with Gyllenhaal and Russo in the video above.

Imagine if they made a movie about it from the perspective of the black students on those campuses, and you have the basis for Dear White People, which opened today in theaters nationwide. From the moment I saw the satirical banned Winchester University recruitment video, I knew I needed to go see the movie. And I knew I had to take my white coworkers with me. Because I wanted to take them to see a "black" movie. Because I wanted them to get an inside look, even a small one, into what it's like to be a black face in a sea of white.

Follow me for just a minute, and I'll explain why. I grew up in a predominantly white area. And now, I'm one of the few black faces I see in my neighborhood/doctor's office/kids' schools. And I have very rarely experienced an instance of overt racism. But what I have experienced is everyday race-related incidents sometimes called racial microaggressions. Simply put, those are racially charged incidents or slights that are seen as offensive to the minority but are, in many cases, seen as totally benign to the offender. Still confused? Here are a few that I’ve experienced just this year: being mistaken for "the help" when out shopping; getting caught up in conversations about how racism doesn't exist and would "go away if black people stopped talking about it"; being greeted with an exuberant finger-snap and "hey, girlfriend" instead of the same "good morning" as your white coworkers.

Still with me? Great. While the movie does have a few missteps — our group of eight agreed that the movie tried to do too much — it's definitely an inside look into these so-called microaggressions. Here's a few other themes we picked up from the movie on which you should probably take note.

1. Stop asking black people if you can touch their hair. I get it, my afro does look like a fluffy cloud. And yes, I do change up my style from time to time. But I have co-workers whose hair I find to be so thick and long that I get mesmerized by it and yet, I have never felt compelled to touch it. Nor have I ever thought to ask her if it's her "real hair." Leave it alone.
2. Stop trying to put everyone into a box. Our entire team loved the Lionel character. He spent the entire movie struggling to find his identity — to find a group to which he could belong. In one scene, he describes how he's not black enough because he listens to Mumford and Sons. We are not one monolithic group — and I don’t mean black people; I mean all people.
3. How the media manipulates images of black people. One of the film's numerous underlying themes (if you've read any of the reviews, you'll know that there are many of them — probably too many) is the prospect of a reality show being shot on the campus of the fictitious university. As one of our editors said: "They don't want interesting, they want big asses, twerking and language like 'ratchet' and 'basic bitch' that they can use on Instagram."
4. The N-word is an offensive term that we should stop using. This goes for everybody. Nearly everyone remarked on how many times the N-word was used in the movie. If you're interested: 17 times. Eight more than it was used in the Jay Z and Justin Timberlake collab "Holy Grail," and the same number of times it was used in Drake's "Started from the Bottom." At the same time, please don't engage in theorizing why white people should be able to use it if black people can. Why would you want to?
5. Just because I'm black doesn't mean I'm an expert in all things black. Our fave character Lionel got this a lot. Thinking of asking my opinion on growing up in the inner city? Don't. I have no idea; I grew up in the suburbs. Wondering if the latest stupid comments made by a high-profile athlete or executive are racist? Sure, ask my opinion. But I don't speak for all black people, so don't tell your other black friends that I said it was OK.

Watch the trailer, then go see the movie and share in the comments.

The soup is quite easy to make with canned or fresh pumpkin puree, and the spiderweb and spider garnishes can be created in under 10 minutes. This is one fast soup! For a hearty meal, I like to serve it with some slices of artisan bread topped with Parmesan and black pepper and then toasted in the oven. This recipe also includes ingredient substitutions to easily make it a vegan, dairy-free soup recipe.

Start by slicing up your olives. Cut an olive in half lengthwise. One half will be the spider's body, and the other half will make the legs.

Slice the leg section in half, horizontally this time.

Now cut each of those 2 sections in half again.

Once more, cut each of the 4 sections in half. You should now have 8 thin slices. Repeat this with the remaining olives.

Whip up your soup, and heat it until boiling. Ladle it into your bowls, and get ready to draw. If your sour cream is too thick, then you can thin it out with a little bit of milk. If you use coconut milk, make sure to use the full-fat canned variety, and mix it well. Put your sour cream (or coconut milk) into a squeeze bottle, and draw a spiral on the top of each bowl of soup.

Using a toothpick, start from the center of the spiral, and draw several lines to the outer edges. This helps create the spiderweb shape.

You might need to use the sour cream (or coconut milk) to trace over those lines to really make the spiderweb pop.

Place the bodies of your spiders at the center of each spiderweb.

Arrange the legs of the spiders, 4 on each side of the body.

There you have it! Spooky spiderweb soup ready in 20 minutes or less!

Spiderweb pumpkin soup recipe

This soup is easily dairy-free and vegan by substituting with the ingredients in parentheses. If you don't have a squeeze bottle, then you can use a zip-top plastic bag with the very tip of a corner snipped off instead.

Serves 4

Prep time: 10 minutes | Cook time: 10 minutes | Total time: 20 minutes

Ingredients:

• 4 large black olives
• 2 tablespoons butter (or coconut oil)
• 1 (29 ounce) can pumpkin puree
• 2 cups chicken stock (or vegetable stock)
• 1 teaspoon ginger powder
• 4 fresh sage leaves, finely chopped
• 1/2 teaspoon coarse sea salt or kosher salt
• 1/8 teaspoon fresh ground pepper
• 1 tablespoon real maple syrup
• 1/4 cup sour cream (or canned coconut milk)
• 1/2 teaspoon milk (optional)

Instructions:

1. Make your spiders by slicing the olives in half lengthwise.
2. Thinly slice 4 of the olive halves into 8 segments each. Set the olives aside for garnishing.
3. In a large pot over high heat, melt the butter (or coconut oil).
4. Stir in the pumpkin puree, stock, ginger powder, chopped sage, salt, pepper and maple syrup.
5. Heat until boiling, about 8 to 10 minutes.
6. Divide the soup among 4 bowls.
7. Put the sour cream (or coconut milk) into a squeeze bottle. If the sour cream is really thick, then add the milk, and shake well.
8. Use the sour cream (or coconut milk) to draw a spiral on each bowl of soup.
9. Use a toothpick to draw straight lines from the center of each spiral to the outer edges.
10. Draw on top of these lines with the sour cream (or coconut milk).
11. Place an olive half in the center of each web, and arrange 8 olive slivers around each half to make the spiders.

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My daughter is learning to drive. She's got her driver's permit, some cool shades and the determination that one day soon she can drive herself to the mall. Since I'm the parent — and the one teaching her to drive — shouldn't I get to tell her when she can take friends in her car? According to the California DMV, it's their job.

When we were teens, the minute you snagged the coveted driver's license you took off to pick up your friends. The mall? The beach? It didn't matter because you had instant maturity and independence — or so it seemed. The reality of teens driving with friends in the car is that they are at a greater risk of being in a crash. The California DMV shares that drivers between the ages of 16 and 17 are 3.6 times more likely to be involved in a fatal crash when they are driving with passengers — and that risk increases as the number of passengers increases. In California the license holder "must be accompanied and supervised by a licensed parent, guardian or other licensed driver 25 years of age or older or a licensed or certified driving instructor when you transport passengers under 20 years of age at any time, for the first 12 months."

So obviously driver's license restrictions make sense from a safety standpoint — don't get me wrong. I worry constantly about my kids driving and hope that neither of them is ever in a serious car crash. But there are three reasons why I don't like these restrictions.

None of the other parents obey them. Wait, what? That's right... very few of the parents I know will enforce the "no friends in the car" law. And before you go all "If your friends jumped off a bridge… " on me, hear me out. If my kid is one of the only kids not allowed to drive friends around she isn't likely to take the restrictions seriously. And when it comes time for the Friday night football game, what will they do? All of these kids will pile into one driver's car anyway. So we not only have to enforce the rule that she can't drive friends, but that she can't be driven by friends, either. That's a bucket of cold water on your social life.

My kid, my rules. I wouldn't have let my kids take their driver's license test if I didn't think they were 100 percent prepared to drive. And if I feel that my daughter is a capable and safe enough driver to give her BFF a ride home from school, I think I should be able to decide that for my own family. Most families with younger siblings use this argument when allowing their new drivers to cart the little ones around to school, karate or dance lessons.

Driving restrictions are bad for the environment. That sounds like a stretch, but it bugs me. New drivers used to be able to all pile into a few cars and head to the football game or debate team meeting. Now, those same 10 kids need to drive 10 separate cars, all arriving at the same destination and fighting for the same parking spaces. And when they all leave, that's 10 times the number of new drivers on the road to worry about.

Yes, we obey the driving restrictions in our house — but that doesn't mean I can't call them stupid.

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Anna Cardwell, who is now 20 years old and married with a child of her own, told TMZ that her mom's new boyfriend is the same man who molested her when she was just 8 years old. Mark McDaniel, who is actually Mama June's ex-boyfriend, was released from jail after serving a 10-year sentence for forcing a girl to perform oral sex on him.

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Shortly after McDaniel was freed, Mama June began dating him again, but she denied she was seeing the registered sex offender. However, photos of her with McDaniel and lots of other evidence further confirmed that the reality star was indeed dating McDaniel again.

Cardwell believed her mom at first when she told Cardwell she was not dating her molester. But now, after having received more information on the issue, Cardwell knows she was betrayed by her own mom in the worst possible way. She wants everyone to know how twisted her mom is for dating the man who sexually abused her as a child.

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Cardwell, also known as Chickadee on the Here Comes Honey Boo Boo reality show, says her relationship with her mom is now super-damaged because of this, TMZ added. Mama June is not allowed anywhere near Chickadee's daughter as long as McDaniel is around.

In relation to the shocking news of Cardwell's molestation by McDaniel, TLC has actually cancelled the family's reality show for good, and the network has offered Mama June's daughter counseling.

Lady Gaga blames ex-manager for MIA "Do What U Want" video

But that's not how Gaga felt.

The Grammy-winning pop star, who's known for pushing boundaries all over the music world, was so nervous about working with such an enduring star as Tony Bennett that she had to drink to calm herself down!

"I was keeping a whiskey under my stool because I was very nervous to be around him," she confessed to E! News.

Luckily, the nerves wore off quickly.

"The second we were in the studio together, it was so magical," Gaga said. "We were bouncing improvisation off each other and we were laughing. And then, gradually, we became greater and greater friends. And I think because of that, our singing became more and more honest and more and more authentic."

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And it sounds like Gaga may have been in a little bit of a creative rut before she worked with Bennett but that he pulled her right back out of it, because she continued, saying, "He's the reason that I'm here today, that I'm still making music, that I'm still excited to make music. Even singing with Tony now, going back on tour, it has completely changed the way I am on stage. It actually revived something in me that I haven't felt in a few years. It's a certain resilience, a certain confidence."

Sounds like we owe Mr. Bennett for keeping Mother Monster at the top of her game. And it's a good thing — as happy as the new album has made Gaga's fans, it might have made her dad even happier.

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"As an Italian-American woman, the biggest thing for us in our lives is making our dads proud, and my father has never been more proud of me than he is right now," Gaga gushed.

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A lot of folks — celebrities included — offered their thoughts on what was Miley's bootylicious signature move at the time, including "Don't" crooner Ed Sheeran. He made some not-so-nice comments, including one calling Miley a stripper.

It was in September of last year that Sheeran said in an interview, "I think she's got an amazing voice. I just think she's packaged the wrong way... When I first heard 'Wrecking Ball,' I thought it was a brilliant song, but the video distracts too much from it."

"I think encouraging young people to twerk might be a bad thing," he continued. "It's a stripper's move. If I had a daughter of nine, I wouldn't want her twerking."

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Predictably, Cyrus wasn't stoked about the backhanded compliment.

But now, Sheeran is taking back some of his words — he says he didn't mean to offend anyone and, to be honest, the name he's calling himself is a little worse than "stripper."

"I was a bit of a c***," Sheeran said in a recent interview with The Sun. "I do feel bad about it as I'd be f***ing livid if someone said that about me. My general point was I wanted her to sing the songs so people could see what an amazing artist she is. I just worded it wrong."

And it looks like Sheeran is really, really sorry, because he said almost the same thing in a recent radio interview.

"I said [something] along the lines of, ‘Your voice is amazing, your songs are amazing, just stop twerking.' I didn't say it in the nicest way and I do genuinely love her music and think her voice is great," he confessed. "I don't really know what to do. I'll find a way to [apologize]."

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Aww. Here's hoping Miley can find it in her heart to forgive him.

Will Ferrell's Elf was a massive success. Between the box office and the wildly successful Broadway rendition, the story has pulled in more than $173 million. The next step in capitalizing on Buddy the Elf's story? Turning it into a stop-motion cartoon for a television special. The program, Elf: Buddy's Musical Christmas, will include music from the Broadway show as well as a retelling of the original story from the movie. However, if Buddy (this time voiced by The Big Bang Theory's Jim Parsons) is returning to our screens, we have a few requirements.

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1. The elevator Christmas tree

If they can make Rudolph's nose glow, they can make the elevator buttons light up like a Christmas tree.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

2. Asphalt is... lava?

We can't remember what was happening here. But we need it to happen again.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

3. "The yellow ones don't stop"

Poor Buddy! It's still one of our favorite moments, though, and we can't wait to see how they recreate it in stop-motion.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

4. The revolving door

Here's the thing: Not enough people fully enjoy revolving doors the way they should. And why not? What's the problem? Get your butts in those spinning doors and go for a run! It's way better than jogging on a treadmill, that's for sure.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

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5. He must get hit by something... anything

Preferably a snowball. And when he does, we'll accept no other exclamation than this one:

GIF credit: Giphy.com

6. He needs to have "a moment"

We're not saying things need to hit tearjerker levels. We don't even request that he use the same put-downs as last time. As a matter of fact, if he came up with new teasing nicknames for himself, that'd be even better.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

7. The paper-cutting art

Can you imagine how tiny the animators would need to cut the paper to recreate the scene where Buddy redecorates Santa's workshop for him? We're cruel. But we need to see it.

GIF credit: Giphy.com

8. "Buddy the Elf. What's your favorite color?"

Admit it. If you were in college the first time you saw Elf, you probably changed your voice mail message to that line. It's single-handedly the most memorable moment of the movie. How could they not include it?

GIF credit: Giphy.com

Whatever NBC does with Buddy and his journey to New York, we're sure it'll be amazing. We can't wait to see it!

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Renée Zellweger lets the public know how she feels about her taut new face

And for good reason — the Bridget Jones star looks almost nothing like herself. Some have made fun. Others have expressed sympathy or concern. Zellweger herself said she's glad people think she looks different, because she's living a different life.

Now, Heidi Montag, the woman who spent the 2010s seemingly on a quest to rack up plastic surgery records, is weighing in.

The former Hills star also shocked fans, friends and family with sudden, drastic transformations that left her almost unrecognizable. She appeared on Extra! and talked about her own plastic surgery experiences, as well as how they related to what Zellweger is going through now.

According to Montag, at first, the public scrutiny she received over her face was isolating, and she wants to make sure no one going through the same things feels that way.

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"I don't know if Renée Zellweger just aged like she said but, for me, when I see people look totally different, I have an empathy," Montag said. "I feel like I know why — at least why I did it — and it brings me back to that time in my life, and I feel for them."

Along with her understanding for Zellweger's situation, Montag added that self-acceptance is an extremely important trait in anyone who's having plastic surgery for the right reasons.

"My heart kind of goes out to them to think, 'Well, why did you do that?' and 'Are you happy with it?'" she said. "It's a hard, life-changing decision. When anyone does that, then obviously they're unhappy with something. So I hope that they found their happiness."

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Do you agree with Montag? Tell us what you think in the comments below.

QUIZ: Are you a hard-core Pretty Little Liars fan?

"The identity of Big A is going to be revealed before Season 7 starts," King, who is the executive producer and showrunner, dished. She continued, "Yeah, that's a big scoop, that is. That's a big scoop."

We're currently in the middle of Season 5, which means there is at most a season and a half left before we discover the identity of Big A. Little A was, of course, revealed as Mona (Janel Parrish) back in the Season 2 finale.

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We say, take this new information with a grain of salt. If we know anything, it's that the Pretty Little Liars producers know how to play games almost as sneaky as Big A. And they've been known to tell us things and word sentences just so to make it seem like one thing until the answer is actually revealed.

For example, at PaleyFest last spring, executive producer Oliver Goldstein told us we would discover A's identity in the near future. "Maybe not as fast as you think," he cautioned, "but you will discover A's identity very soon."

Pretty Little Liars finale kills off the biggest character yet

Apparently "very soon" is a relative term, since we now know that it could be almost two whole seasons after he said that.

Also, when Ezra's game was revealed back in Season 4, producers assured us that what we'd seen was real. We, of course, took this as confirmation that he was Big A when, in fact, the game he was playing at was a novel, not destroying the liars.

Watch the clip from the Halloween special below.

Do you think I. Marlene King is telling the truth this time? Or is she just being a sneaky little liar again?

Ingredients:

• 2 ounces 100 percent cranberry juice
• 2 ounces spiced rum
• 4 ounces spicy ginger beer (Blenheim's or Reed's)
• Candied ginger pieces, for garnish

This drink takes a combination of spiced rum and spicy ginger beer and mixes them with cranberry juice to create the ultimate solution to the cold-weather blues. By adding candied ginger or other candied pieces to garnish the glass, the drink really gets an extra oomph. Making the drink takes only three easy steps, and you'll be ready to enjoy it in no time. Fill your glass with ice, and combine the cranberry juice and rum. Top that off with ginger beer, then garnish your glass, and you'll be headed off to a crisp, fall wonderland after just one sip.

More fall drink recipes

Make your way into fall with this pear sangria recipe
Celebrate apple season with this apple cider margarita
Turn caramel apples into a boozy milkshake

Listen: We're in no way suggesting that Death Comes to Pemberley is an actual television masterpiece. It's truly not. It is, however, a chance to sink back into the world you've missed since the last time you watched Pride and Prejudice or Becoming Jane. Plus, we're pretty much in love with the cast.

Why give it a go? We'll explain.

1. Jenna Coleman

We've thrown a lot of shade at Coleman during her role as a companion on Doctor Who. She's not the Ponds. She's just too whiny sometimes. In Pemberley, though, you'll experience a whole new level of acting from Coleman. While we still aren't sure if her take on Elizabeth's baby sister is annoying or brilliant, we enjoyed the effort and the chance to see her do something new.

2. Matthew Rhys as Mr. Darcy

Can we get a massive "Yes, please!" Rhys first captured our attention during his run on Brothers and Sisters. His television followup on The Americans is equally inspiring. Some critics are claiming he's a little stuffy but, uh, let's not forget he's playing Mr. Darcy. Is he Colin Firth? No. But who is, besides Colin Firth? Rhys is still awesome to watch, though. We'll never get sick of him.

3. You know you miss Pemberley and Elizabeth

The worst part of Pride and Prejudice? Obviously, the ending. Luckily for us, there have been plenty of writers willing to capitalize on Austin's well-sculpted characters. This two-part miniseries is based on the "sequel" written by P.D. James. It takes place six years after Elizabeth and Darcy married and follows the couple as they become wrapped up in a murder mystery. Who's to blame? Let's just say everyone's biggest suspect happens to be a familiar "face."

Are there a million other options on Sunday nights? Of course. But we promise that any fan of Jane will be a fan of Pemberley, if for no other reason than the chance to spend more time with your favorite pair of quarrelsome lovebirds.

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The week starts off in pretty dramatic fashion.

Hank addresses "the allegations"

Wilkinson is sitting in the kitchen waiting for Baskett to come home from another business trip. Although she seems eerily calm at first — trading small talk with him about his trip — things escalate when she says, "Jessica told me..."

Without any further explanation, Baskett's head goes down and he appears distraught. And, well, that only seems to infuriate his wife more.

When she asks him if he cheated on her, he responds, "I did not do what the allegations said." He continues to use that specific, strangely formal wording as they argue. Could it be that Baskett is using that phrasing to admit guilt without expressly admitting guilt?

SheKnows dating and relationship expert Andrea Syrtash says it's a very real possibility.

"It is possible that Hank is using this specific formal language to avoid telling the truth. In other words, there may be details in the allegations that are not true, so by saying 'these allegations are not true,' he may feel he's not lying — even if certain aspects of the allegations happened," said Syrtash.

Unfortunately for Baskett, so much of what he says during his confrontation with Wilkinson seems to suggest he did, in fact, do something wrong. He claims that he "talked to Kyle because I opened up to him man-to-man."

Kendra taps into her pent-up anger

When Wilkinson takes offense at the fact that Baskett confided in someone other than his wife, he responds, "I can't say it now, but I swear to God these allegations are not true" and, later, "I will tell you in time." (Say what? Tell her what?)

According to Syrtash, Baskett actions are hurting his case more than helping it.

"The old expression goes, 'People who have nothing to hide, hide nothing,'" she explained. "At this point, Hank should offer up as much evidence as he can to support his case and try to rebuild his wife's trust. Instead of being defensive, he should be open to answering very specific questions so they could move on together or apart. Failing to share details won't serve their relationship."

Clearly, Wilkinson wasn't a fan of Baskett's cryptic responses either. As the argument becomes more heated, Wilkinson screams at Baskett. At one point, she grabs a trophy inscribed with "Best Husband and Father" she'd had made for him.

"You ain't no father anymore, motherf***er!" she shouted as he wrestled the glass trophy from her — but not before she managed to slice her hand. As Baskett ducks out, trying to skirt the camera crew, Wilkinson heads to the local urgent care.

Luckily, the lacerations on her hand were superficial and didn't require much medical attention.

Kendra opens up in therapy

The second episode picks up a few days after Wilkinson threw Baskett out. Wilkinson gets a call from her bestie, Jessica Hall, who wants to have lunch with her. Also at the lunch? Jessica's husband Kyle, whom Baskett now infamously confided in.

But first, therapy.

While speaking to her therapist, Wilkinson makes an interesting comment. She says, "My trust is destroyed. He worked his ass off for five years to make sure I trusted him."

Hmm. Couldn't the fact that Baskett had to work so hard to earn Wilkinson's trust have been a red flag that there was trouble in the relationship on either or both sides?

Absolutely, says Syrtash. "Couples shouldn't test each other to make sure their partners are being truthful unless trust has been broken. The hope is that a foundation of trust is built through time and experience," she said.

"Whenever a relationship feels like it's on shaky ground, chances are there were clues signaling the same issue or red flags at another point in time," Syrtash continued. "Nobody should work 'so hard' to gain their partner's trust and respect unless they have betrayed their loved one or done something to make their partner lose confidence."

Wilkinson's therapist suggests that perhaps Wilkinson is using Baskett as a scapegoat to unload all of her insecurities and frustrations about her own father — aka the girl's got daddy issues — which prompts some deep introspection on Wilkinson's part.

Kyle comes to Hank's defense

Her self-reflection carries her right through lunch, during which Kyle tells her, "I think it's difficult for him to tell you right now, and he's thinking about how he's going to tell you. But I will tell you there are two sides to every story."

And while Kyle won't spill explicit details, he does say that he wouldn't be there speaking with Wilkinson if he didn't believe Baskett is a "true, honest, good father and good husband."

Through therapy and talking to Jessica and Kyle, Kendra comes to the realization that she hadn't been allowing Hank to really talk to her or open up to her.

But how helpful can her accepting this and working to fix it really be if Hank doesn't meet her halfway by telling her the truth?

"Both parties need to dialogue openly and honestly if they want to make a breakthrough and rebuild. A relationship isn't unilateral," said Syrtash. "Both parties need to step up and do the work if they want to change."

What do you think? Did this week seem to cement Hank's guilt? Do you think he will take therapy seriously and tell Kendra what really happened? Check out a sneak peek from next week here.

More Kendra on Top reviews

Kendra on Top: Are Hank's tears real or is he manipulating her?
Where the hell's Hank? Kendra's man still MIA on Kendra on Top
How the Kendra on Top premiere was real, relatable and so devastating

The handles for both sets of brooms are made from pretzel sticks. The variation is in the bristles of the broom, which can be made from cheese sticks for a savory snack, or pull apart Twizzlers for a candy version.

While the brooms are quite easy to make, the tie around the top of the bristles can be tricky. Just remember that it's pretty much just for decoration.

If you tie the chive too tightly, it can tear, so try doing it just tight enough so that it stays in place.

For the candy version of the broomsticks, try twisting the strand of Twizzlers if tying it is giving you trouble.

Whether you go savory or sweet, these are super-cute Halloween treats.

Candy witch's broom recipe

These sweet brooms are a breeze to make. If you have a little trouble getting the candy bristles to stay in place, try wetting your fingers with water before pressing them together.

Serves 2 

Total time: 10 minutes

Ingredients:

• 1 pull apart Twizzlers candy
• 2 pretzel sticks

Instructions:

1. Cut the Twizzlers candy into 3 even pieces. Two will be for the broom bristles and the third piece will pull apart to make the ties.
2. Gently untwist the center of 1 Twizzlers piece to make a hole.
3. Stick the end of 1 pretzel stick into the hole, then fold the Twizzler in half, over that short end of the pretzel.
4. Carefully pull apart the Twizzlers' ends, leaving the center portion that's wrapped over the pretzel connected.
5. Use a strand from your third Twizzlers piece to wrap around the top of the bristles to help hold everything in place.
6. Repeat steps 2 through 5 with remaining pretzel stick and Twizzlers piece.

Cheese witch's broom recipe

Kids and adults love the realistic look of these witch's broom snacks. If you don't have chives, you can thinly slice green onions lengthwise to use for your ties.

Serves 3

Total time: 10 minutes

Ingredients:

• 1 mozzarella cheese stick
• 3 pretzel sticks
• 3 chives

Instructions:

1. Cut the cheese stick into 3 equal sections.
2. Poke a pretzel stick into 1 end of each cheese section.
3. Carefully pull apart the cheese strands from the opposite end, to about 2/3 of the way up.
4. Wrap a chive around, 2/3 of the way from the bottom of your bristles. Tie the chive carefully and cut off the extra ends.
5. Repeat with remaining brooms.

More healthy Halloween snack ideas

Candy corn fruit skewers
Halloween cheese mummy
Frightful fruit kebabs

My mom used to make poke cake all the time, but it was never this fancy or decorated. Usually she would make a yellow cake, poke some holes and throw on some butterscotch pudding. If you have never made poke before, it's a simple way to make a plain cake go from "this is good" to "THIS IS GREAT!"

All you have to do is make a cake, poke holes into it, pour pudding over the top, spread with whipped cream and decorate. It's so easy and so delicious.

Pumpkin spice poke cake recipe

This cake is packed full of pumpkin spice pudding and topped with sweet whipped cream and lots of Halloween decorations. It's the perfect way to take a boring cake to a whole new sweet level. If you can't find pumpkin spice pudding mix, then butterscotch can be used in place.

Yields 1 (9 x 13-inch) cake

Prep time: 15 minutes | Bake time: 40 minutes | Inactive time: 1 hour | Total time: 1 hour 55 minutes

Ingredients:

• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 2 cups sugar
• 1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
• 2 teaspoons baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
• 2 cups water
• 3/4 cup vegetable oil
• 2 tablespoons white vinegar
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 1 (3.4 ounce) box instant pumpkin spice pudding mix
• 1 container frozen whipped topping, thawed
• 1/3 cup toffee bits
• Candy corn or candy pumpkins, for decoration

Directions:

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F, and spray a 9 x 13-inch pan with nonstick cooking spray.
2. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, sugar, cocoa powder, baking soda and kosher salt.
3. To a medium-size mixing bowl, add the water, vegetable oil, white vinegar and vanilla extract.
4. Pour the liquid ingredients into the dry ingredients, and stir to combine.
5. Pour the batter into the prepared baking dish, and bake for 30 to 40 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean when tested in the center of the cake.
6. Let the cake cool for about 1 hour, and then poke holes in the top with the end of a wooden spoon.
7. Prepare the pudding mix according to the box's directions, and then pour it over the cake. Let the pudding sink into the holes and sit for 5 minutes.
8. Spread whipped topping on top of the cake, and then sprinkle with toffee bits and decorate with candy corn.

More cake recipes

Mini poke cake recipes
Bundt cake roundup
No-bake ice box cake recipes

So go ahead and throw aside your go-to gift cards and ties and try something new this year. This sexy massage kit is a gift that's sure to please both of you.

1. Aromatic candle

2. Kissable body oil

3. Love dice game

4. Feathers

5. Edible body dust

6. Body soufflé

7. A basket

8. A love note with a coupon for a free massage

Throw it all together in your basket, give to your sweetie and get ready for a great night!

Other ways to treat each other

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Popular fashion retailer now offers affordable bondage accessories
What is tantric sex?

My daughter was recently diagnosed with juvenile arthritis, a serious autoimmune disease that causes pain, requires harsh treatments and has the potential to be disabling. This diagnosis has taken months to get, requiring many out-of-town trips that keep her out of school for hours at a time. Two days ago, on our way back from the appointment where we finally got her diagnosis and treatment plan, she mentioned she was bummed that she was not going to get the October reward.

"October reward?" I wondered aloud. She then explained that if you have perfect attendance during the month, you get a special reward or experience early the following month. While I kept my cool at the time, my blood began to boil, and I started foaming at the mouth.

Why? Because since my kid has some incurable disease that requires weekly injections, causes terrible pain and can impact the quality of her life, she is being punished because she had to miss school. One visit can take up most of a school day, accounting for travel time, lab draws and consultations. However, her grades are fabulous, and she's keeping up just fine.

It really, really bothers me that she's going to miss out on a reward because she is ill. And there is a flip side that will likely impact her and everyone else. Kids who may be really tempted by each month's reward might insist on attending school even if they have a communicable illness. The first drug we're going to try suppresses my daughter's immune system, making it more likely that she will get sick, and if she does, she'll have a harder time fighting it off. In other words, other sick kids in the school will up her risk of getting sick herself.

I've always thought perfect attendance rewards were a sham anyway, because how can you reward someone because they never got sick — or went to school while they were ill? People get sick; people need to recover. It's part of being human. While her school does give an attendance reward at the end of the year to kids who had at least 85 percent attendance during the year (a good solution, in my opinion), this monthly thing is total bullcrap and unfairly punishes children who are sick.

More on kids and school

Boys, girls, purple penguins: What we call our kids matters
15 Banned books you should totally let your kids read
Mom brings vulva cookies to school to teach second-graders about anatomy