Feature film costume designer Shay Cunliffe has been designing for A-listers since the '80s, working with everyone and anyone from Matt Damon in The Bourne Legacy to Diane Keaton and Mandy Moore in 2007's Because I Said So. Most recently, she worked as the costume designer for Fifty Shades Freed and is the designer for the upcoming film Book Club, which is full of Hollywood leading ladies like Jane Fonda and Candice Bergen.

Cunliffe (pictured below) chatted exclusively with SheKnows about designing for leading Hollywood celebrities and the way the costume design industry is changing thanks to movements like #MeToo and body positivity. She also got candid about actors' insecurities and those Hollywood moments she'll never forget.

SheKnows: How do you handle it as a designer when you have an actor who says, "Hey, I feel insecure about certain things..."?

Shay Cunliffe: I have a lot of compassion for that because I myself have things I would never wish to highlight. I know how tricky it is. I was complaining to my sister about how awful I felt about various aspects of my body and she said, "My God, you spend your life in fitting rooms with the most perfect little, tiny bodies. Of course you're feeling [that way]." So when an actor just begins to mention what they're not crazy about, I get it. I agree with them. I know there's a school of thought like, "Just be proud of what you're shaped like. Ignore it." I personally think, "Why not emphasize what's great and downplay what's not so great?" I'm a big believer in that. I'm sort of amazed that it seems a lot of people now think, "No, I'm wearing that. Who cares?" I personally think there's a look for everyone, and it doesn't have to be that you wear everything. With a difficult shape in an actor — and it doesn't have to be large or small. Some actors are so tiny that they look overwhelmed in most clothes. And some actors are a pretty great shape, but they're actually pretty short-waisted so the waist seam doesn't hit in the right place. There's a whole range of reasons things don't work. With a lot of people, I realize that we should make their clothes. That's essentially the secret weapon a costume designer has — is deciding pretty quickly that we're not going to find things that are that good a fit. And by the time we finished altering it, we should just have made it. And I think in real life, I would advise people, if they've got a couple of pieces that they know are the ones that fit them perfectly, I would definitely investigate local seamstresses and tailors who can maybe copy it for you. I think the other thing is getting good alterations done. I think that's a dying thing. Menswear stores still offer that as part of the experience of buying menswear. But I think that, generally, people don't realize you can tweak your clothes in many ways to improve the fit and look of them.

More: Anastasia Steele Finds Her Strength in the Final Fifty Shades Freed Trailer

SK: How do you handle actors who are difficult? Or directors who are difficult?

SC: It's hard. You cannot argue with someone you're collaborating with. All you can do is say why you think one thing is better than another. I will humor them. So, if they propose to me something I think is not a good idea, it's very time-consuming and sometimes wasteful of money, but you have to let it play out. I will prepare what I think it should be and I will also prepare the thing they think it should be and we'll get together and try it on. I photograph everything so I create a folder of all the looks we tried on in the fitting. And hopefully, you sit down and you say, "You know, you're idea was interesting, but it doesn't quite feel like it belongs in this movie," or "It doesn't feel right for this scene, and this is why I think so." And, most of the time, they will actually say, "Yeah, you're right." But if you had tried to stop the conversation, I think you would have failed. So costume designers are the most diplomatic and patient of the collaborators in the process. We joke among ourselves that we're more psychologists than designers some of the time. You know, I'm a parent, and that's certainly made me a better designer.

I realize for many actors, it's a very vulnerable moment. They hardly know you. They met you five minutes earlier and you're going to say, "OK, let's take off your clothes and try some things on." It's very anxious-making, particularly if they've had a hard time finding the right look for themselves. They're having to trust you. And you have to be very nonconfrontational and let them know you're not there to criticize. You're there to collectively come up with something that is great on all fronts… A costume is also a psychological thing. It's not just literally the clothes they're wearing. It's how are they feeling in that scene. So that's been a hard lesson. It's been one that's involved some wasting of money and time, but I realize if they've got it in their mind that it's not right for them, let it go. Try something else. There are always many ways to say the same thing.

SK: Well, you sound like a more patient woman than I.

SC: [Laughs] I am patient. I sometimes wonder if when I realize that I'm in the last films of my career whether I'm going to get really blunt and sort of snap at people. I hear stories of famous old designers who are very blunt, and I wonder if I'll get my year where I just say, "Oh, shut up. You look fantastic."

SK: Who's been your favorite person to work with and why?

SC: You know, wow, I have quite a lot of favorites in a way. Well, I have to say Diane Keaton. I love her very much. I've done about four or five films with her. There's always the task of, like, trying to have her let go of her own unbelievable Diane Keaton style and say, "We're going to have to dial this back." But I hate to name favorites.

SK: Well, I would say if you're going to name favorites, an icon like Diane Keaton is a good one.

SC: Yes. I've just enjoyed her. Everything she wears to work every day is wonderful. You know, you see photos of her going to something in something wonderful and strange and she does it in life. That is hugely to be appreciated. It's like a gift to anyone whose path she crosses.

More: I Hated Fifty Shades of Grey, but All That Changed

SK: Have you seen a shift in sizes for women now that there seems to be more acceptance for different body types?

SC: I think there is a greater range of styles now. I think it's still disappointingly rigid in some ways... I think there's much more acceptance of different body types and many wedding dresses now have better structure built into them, and they work with women who want to cover their arms, women who aren't so young. They do cover the waterfront on that. I think that the fashion industry still has a ways to go. And I think sizing is still very restrictive, realistically, of what they offer. I hope there is a continued evolution. I think there's definitely room for improvement.

SK: Your next movie, Book Club, has so many iconic actors. Can you talk about working with them and that experience?

SC: That was wonderful. I loved that rather than being Mom, the way I feel with Dakota [Johnson of Fifty Shades Freed], I felt like I was slightly junior to everyone, which was delightful. They were all a thrill to work with. Jane Fonda, her character needed amazing clothing, and it needed to be sexy clothing and yet I did not want it inappropriately sexy for a mature woman. And that was the great challenge. But she is very bold and very willing to try looks other people would not have the confidence for. We had a lot of fittings. She's willing to give it all the time it takes to get it right. And those were priceless long hours spent together nailing it. We made quite a few things when we realized that the dress didn't exist to do exactly what we wanted. Other things we bought and altered the hell out of. She sort of knows it takes an army to look that fantastic. And she has unbelievably great posture, which is probably the greatest beauty secret of the ages. I think if you watch her walk across the room, it's a fabulous thing.

SK: Would you consider her the most hands-on actor you've worked with?

SC: Yes. Definitely. It's almost old-school how much care and detail and time she's willing to devote to the process. I say that, but then, you know, Mary Steenburgen, who's very laid back, is the soul of goodness. We spent quite a lot of time in fittings getting the feel of her character just right. And then we made the dress she does her dance routine with Craig T. Nelson in. We spent a lot of time working on the shape for that one to make it everything we wanted it to be. I think that's what I appreciated about these mature actresses is that increasingly young actors don't really have a lot of time for you. They run in and want it to be done very quickly. And all of these ladies know that it's a process, and you're going to go at it on several different sessions and they give it all the time it needs. And they all in their own ways absolutely were open to making that happen, to make sure we got all the details right.

SK: Let’s throw it back. What did the Fifty Shades costumes bring to the characters?

SC: One of the fun parts about dressing them is they both went through changes in the course of the story, which clothing very much got a chance to address. For example, Dakota's character [Anastasia Steele] goes from a student and then a girl with her first job and a small paycheck to being a very rich man's wife… We started dressing her in much more luxurious brands and much more grown-up cuts in the way of clothing. We decided we would do a more sophisticated style for everything she wore at that point. Jamie [Dornan, who plays Christian Grey] slowly kind of went the opposite way with his character. I think he felt in the first film he had been a little too grown-up looking. And we decided we would emphasize the boyishness of this character and the fact that he had been kind of a wild young teenager and he was, after all, still a very young man. So we tried to backpedal from the serious businessman look of the first movie and lighten it all up a bit and make it all a little bit rougher — sort of make him a more contemporary figure if you will.

SK: How much did the Fifty Shades actors collaborate with you on their wardrobe?

SC: They both had very strong feelings about what they're comfortable in. Dakota in particular had very strong feelings about who her character was and what that girl would have chosen. We had an initial, early conversation where we looked at images I had pulled together that suggest the direction the character would take and she had also gathered some images on Pinterest, which she shared with me. We talked it through. From then on, we had fittings where I had gathered lots of options, and she had strong feelings looking at everything. Like, "Yes, love this. Want to try this on... No, I don't think I like that."

But Jamie more knows what he as a human being is comfortable in. He didn't really have strong feelings like, "Christian Grey wouldn't like that." He more was like, "Oh, I love this jacket. Would you get me one for my own life?" Or, "Feels great. Can I wear more of this?" So he was really coming at it like a guy knowing what he likes. He does not like fussy things. He's like a very straight-on guy, and we stuck with very classic clothing like that for him. We didn't go for the high-fashion pieces, which are full of detail and trying hard. We felt he was more of a throwaway style. One of those old-time movie stars where they don't have to overwork it.

More: Another Fifty Shades Book Is on the Way, & It Means More Christian Grey

SK: Can you talk a little bit about the big look for the film — the wedding dress?

SC: Early on, the studio asked me if there was any wedding designer that would be a good fit to work with us on creating a wedding dress, and I immediately thought of Monique Lhuillier, who has a very high level of craftsmanship. And I know from working with them before on films that they're very helpful. They work with you. They're capable of going through quite a different range of style. So we approached them early on and Monique was very interested in collaborating. And that always makes a costume designer a little worried that they're going to lose control of that outfit, but it was actually a dream collaboration. It was really a dialogue between us. I had a long conversation with her about the feel of the character, the look we were going for. I sent her a look book of images we'd pulled together of something we'd hoped that dress could be, and then she sent me three different sketches she had come up with and a box of fabric swatches she proposed, which was fantastic. And we narrowed it down to the exact kind of lace we wanted to use and details we both agreed on. It was hugely Monique's work and her studio's beautiful handcraft, but she was very respectful of my input of what I also saw. We only actually got the completed dress the day before we shot the scene. I was very nervous, but I also know they really do what they do so well. It fit her like a dream. I was incredibly relieved. I think it was after work at night where Dakota had had a long day and didn't really want to come in and try on the wedding dress and I was saying, "We have to. We can't leave this until the morning. We've got to know so we can stay up and do some alterations." But she walked right into it. It was beautiful. I loved how old-fashioned it was, the dress, but you really saw the beautiful line of the body through it. And it managed to be sexy yet traditional all at the same time.

Before you go, check out this exclusive clip about the making of Anastasia's wedding dress. Fifty Shades Freed is available on iTunes, DVD, Blu-Ray and On-Demand now.

After three years of relaxing, growing in their loving relationship and becoming one of Bachelor Nation's most beloved couples, Kaitlyn Bristowe and Shawn Booth are finally talking about their wedding like its officially happening. Sure, the couple has dropped vague hints about their wedding over the last few years, but they've never given fans the impression they're rushing to the altar to seal the deal. But now? Now we might finally have something to work with.

More: Kaitlyn Bristowe's Got a New Job In the Entertainment Industry

The former Bachelorette star recently chatted with E! News and during that conversation, opened up about the weddings and some thoughts she had about the big day.

"We just want all of our closest friends and family there," Bristowe explained to E!. "All you ever hear from people who got married is how stressful planning is and how fast the day goes. We don't wanna get caught up in the colors, flowers, all that stuff. We wanna be laid back and enjoy it for what weddings are supposed to be about: Celebrating our love in front of loved ones."

She also dropped this cute detail into her wedding day insights: "We would 110% write our own vows. It means so much to hear what the other person feels in that moment — in their words."

While she and Booth have yet to set a date or even put any of their plans in motion, it's very clear that the wedding will come one of these days and until then, they're just here to have fun. A perfect example of this is evident in their recent, respective Instagram posts celebrating their three-year anniversary.

In Bristowe's sentimental Instagram post, she wrote about the journey that she and Booth have been on since their Bachelorette days and why she's still so taken with him all these years later.

"3 years ago we were on a show that has the most extravagant dates, allows people to travel the world, and makes you fall in love in perfect settings. But the truth is I fell in love even harder after all of that was gone. We have traveled, created so many memories and traditions, with whatever setting we are in," she wrote.

Meanwhile, Booth took the opportunity to make a joke about Bristowe wanting to keep their brand strong by tagging what she's wearing so their fans would know in his commemorative anniversary post: "Celebrating 3 years with this gorgeous woman. She told me to tell you her “romper” is tagged .. and if you’re wondering, my socks are from Reebok."

More: The Bachelorette's Kaitlyn Bristowe & Shawn Booth Open Up About Wedding Plans (VIDEO)

Bristowe and Booth may want to rethink that whole "not setting a wedding date yet" thing because these anniversary posts are a perfect example of how cute their love story is and why we want to see more of it as it plays out through wedding planning as well as celebrating on an actual wedding day. Let's make this happen, you guys!

There's something so innocent about a little kid playing in a sandbox: Is there anything sweeter than a tiny human who needs nothing more than some sand and a plastic bucket to be happy?

It's hard to imagine this simple form of entertainment could be hazardous to a child's health — but the truth of the matter is, if they're playing in store-bought sand, they might be exposed to some serious risks.

More: The Best Indie Baby Beauty Brands

Uncover the ingredients in sandbox sand

When purchasing a bag of sandbox sand, you may just be exposing your kid to toxic ingredients, namely microcrystalline silica. Commonly, playground sand is made from quartz rock, which is why many of these bags o' fun are slapped with a California Proposition 65 label warning of the health hazard contained within.

Recognize the health hazards

As any parent can attest, sandbox sand is dusty and dirty. Unfortunately, "as children play, sand becomes airborne and inhaled," explains Nick Cicone of Kid Safe Sand. When these tiny particles of silica lurking in sandbox sand enter your kid's lungs, it can cause serious illness.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, breathing in the tiny carcinogen can lead to silicosis, an irreversible disease, as well as lung cancer, airway diseases and pulmonary tuberculosis. Exposure to these compounds may also be related to the development of chronic renal disease, development of autoimmune disorders and also have other bad health outcomes. The Environmental Protection Agency warns that exposure to silica is bad news regardless of the source.

The good news? It's preventable.

More: Surefire Ways to Lose a Good Babysitter

Discover safe sandbox sand

The most important — and easiest — way to shield your little ones from toxic sandbox sand is to opt for safe sandbox sand or other play sand alternatives. "A safe sandbox is all about sand not containing health hazards, such as microcrystalline silica," explains Cicone. "Silica-free sand contains no known hazardous substances," making it a safe sandbox option for your child to dive in and get dirty with.

When using safe sandbox alternatives to traditional play sand outdoors, be mindful of materials that are designed to absorb moisture, as they will eventually mildew and need replacing.

Alternatives

That said, dangerous sandbox sand and silica-free sand are not the only options for your child's sandbox.

Other safe sandbox options include:

• Pea gravel
• Crushed walnuts
• Rice
• Dried beans and legumes
• Cornmeal
• Flaxseed
• Fish tank rocks from pet store
• Rubber mulch made from recycled tire chips
• Mini corncobs from the pet store

Despite the truth about sandbox sand, if you can't afford to replace the play sand you already have with silica-free sandbox sand right away, it can still be made safer by keeping materials damp and minimizing dust. Just remember to keep your sandbox covered when your kids aren't at play; cats and other outdoor critters may see this play space as a litter box (and expose your children to toxoplasmosis, a parasite contained in cat feces).

By taking a few precautionary steps, you can focus less on the hidden dangers and more on how you’re going to get your kids to stop throwing sand at each other.

A version of this article was originally published in July 2012.

Oh, did you think the drama between Kim Kardashian West and Tristan Thompson was just going to die down and maybe, one day, go away entirely? Think again. In fact, Thompson has officially upped the petty ante in this cold war, making it very clear to the rest of us that things are worse than we thought between him and the middle Kardashian daughter.

More: Kim Kardashian West Has Officially Disowned Tristan Thompson

Kardashian West made her feelings about Thompson's alleged cheating known on The Ellen DeGeneres Show and, shortly after her appearance, quietly unfollowed the basketball star on social media. Check: Kardashian West. Now, she's revealed that Thompson actually blocked her on Instagram. Checkmate: Thompson.

Kardashian West let the information slip while appearing as a guest on Live with Kelly and Ryan on Friday morning. As reported by People magazine, Live cohost Ryan Seacrest asked Kardashian West if she roots for Khloé Kardashian and Thompson. Kardashian West laughed nervously and said, "I’m always rooting for love. I’m always rooting for families." She continued, possibly referring to that Ellen interview, "The last time I went on TV and I answered some questions about her, I got blocked on social media, and not from Khloé."

The truth is sometimes stranger than fiction, but there you have it. If we're to believe Kardashian West's claims, her having that pragmatic and honest moment with DeGeneres on live television really got under Thompson's skin. Thompson hasn't confirmed what exactly led to him blocking Kardashian West, but the fact remains: Homegirl is blocked.

Folks on Twitter had a field day with this ridiculous development in the feud between Thompson and Kardashian West. One Twitter user wrote, "I think it was rude that Tristan blocked Kim," prompting a response from another user: "he blocked her for what? he was the one that...you know? nvm."

That response only hits on the silliness and pettiness of this entire story, specifically that Thompson is acting as if he's been hurt and wronged in this situation when he is the one facing damning allegations of cheating. What right does he have, if the cheating really did happen?

More: Kim Kardashian West Confirmed All the Rumors About Tristan Thompson

There are rumors going around that Kardashian is going to stay with Thompson and that they have allegedly reconciled, but Khloé? Sis? If you read this, maybe just extricate yourself from this guy's orbit as much as possible. Anyone who stirs up petty drama like this doesn't need to be your choice in a partner.

Although my family is spread over many states, for many years, we gathered for a Father’s Day barbecue each June. My parents, siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents and I would all come together to celebrate. It was such a joyful ritual — and a time for us to connect as a family.

But this year, my grandfather won't be there; he died this January. He lived a beautiful life right up to the age of 90 and died peacefully in his sleep, but that doesn't make his leaving any easier. And with Mother's Day and Father’s Day coming up, the absence of Grandpa — and the absence of our annual gathering together — feels particularly hard to face. Without our elder family member, I’m wondering how we could (or should) celebrate these holidays. Is it even possible, when grieving, to celebrate?

More:  Why This Mom Is Boycotting Mother's Day

I reached out to licensed counselor Amy Lipton, who counsels folks going through loss. She reminded me that although most people are familiar with Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’ five stages of grief (denial, anger, depression, bargaining, acceptance) as a guide to processing loss, it is not a one-size-fits-all.

“People should not feel they are doing it 'wrong' if their process of grieving doesn't neatly fall into each of these headings or are in this particular order," Lipton explains. "The way one grieves has a lot to do with the way that person processes other emotions in their lives, their relationship with the deceased and the circumstances surrounding the loss of the parent — for example, if it was sudden or if it was at the end of a prolonged illness.” Lipton encourages her clients to remember that the most important part of grieving in a healthy way is to let yourself experience the many different complicated and sometimes conflicting feelings that come up.

With that in mind, I asked her and two women who’ve lost someone for their best advice for celebrating through grief.

More:  What Not to Say to a Bereaved Parent

Reach out — & plan something in advance

“Many times, people who are struggling with a loss will avoid thinking about the upcoming holiday until it is here, and they therefore lose the ability to plan to connect with others who could be of support to them on that day,” Lipton said. “Spend Father's or Mother's Day with siblings or other close relatives or friends who knew the parent well and can share in the feelings and spend time actually honoring that person — by sharing memories with one another, preparing and eating foods the parent loved, looking at photographs or going to a place that person enjoyed. The most important piece is to reach out to others and plan in advance together how you will honor your loved one.”

Stay off Facebook

“Post something if you want, but then shut it down for the rest of the day” is the advice given to me by Brandi Ryans, who lost her father a bit more than two years ago. In the years after her father’s death, changing her family’s routines and developing her own ways of honoring his memory became an important part of her grieving and healing process. Ryans notes that her dad was not very sentimental; as a Black man self-employed in the South, his energy was directed toward moving forward and forging a beautiful life. So now, her way of celebrating his memory aligns with that energy. She might post a picture on social media, but then she'll unplug and spend the day lighting candles, taking a shot of moonshine and cherishing her father's image — a new ritual that's unique and specific to their memories together.

Do something they would have loved

Zoe Triantafillou, who lost her mother in 2014, echoes these ideas: making a plan, setting up new rituals and staying connected to the parent's interests and personality as a way to honor them in absentia. Triantafillou's sister, who lives in England, decided to sign up for a garden allotment for Mother's Day — because she wanted to do something their mom had always said she wanted to do. Now, Triantafillou's sister gardens almost every day and stays connected with their mother through the acts of planting and harvesting.

Triantafillou, on the other hand, has turned to writing. She decided to buy a journal she calls her "mom journal" about a week after her mom’s death. In it, Triantafillou started to write about all her emotions — the hurt, sorrow, sadness and anger. She finds she writes the most on her mother’s birthday, on the anniversary of her death and on holidays like Mother’s Day. Now, instead of just writing emotions, Triantafillou also writes to her mother about Triantafillou's son (her mother’s first grandchild) and their family.

More:  Prince William Shared His Childhood Heartbreak With Kids Mourning Their Parents

While commemorative holidays like Mother's Day and Father's Day are meant to be celebrations of all that our parents and elders bring into our lives, it's often overlooked how these holidays might affect someone who’s just lost one of those elders. But each person I interviewed echoed the importance of keeping traditions and memories alive in the name of those we've lost.

Lipton points out that remembering allows us to not only potentially revisit some difficult memories and associated feelings, but also gives us the opportunity to experience positive feelings related to the good memories of our time with loved ones who have died. After all, when we block out the difficult feelings, we often block out the positive ones by association.

On the other hand, when we embrace the range, complexity and depth of life’s emotions — on Mother's Day, Father's Day and every day — it helps us grow, become wiser and appreciate those who are gone as well as those still around us. And it also helps us appreciate that life is far too precious to be taken for granted.

Fullest house ever: John Stamos introduced his 1-month-old son, Billy, to former Full House costars (and dear friends) Lori Loughlin and Bob Saget.

Stamos shared the sweet moment on Instagram this Thursday. In the photo, Stamos holds tiny Billy in his hands as Loughlin and Saget melt all over the baby like candle wax. The best part? Billy's rocking a black onesie that says, "Jesse and the Rippers" on the back. If that sounds familiar, you're definitely a Full House fan. It's a very cute nod to the band Stamos' character, Uncle Jesse, used to play with.

More: John Stamos & Caitlin McHugh Welcome a Son

The caption is pretty darling too. “The Tin Man, Dorothy and The Scarecrow say hi to the cutest of Munchkins. #BillyandtheRippers,” Stamos wrote.

Saget also shared the pic on Instagram with the caption, “~ So much love John. Most beautiful boy and Mommy & Daddy ever. So proud to be a new Uncle/Tin Man, my brother.” You guuuuuuuys.

We'll just come out and say it, OK? We had kind of hoped Lori Loughlin and Stamos might end up together, and when Loughlin didn't show at John's wedding, we took it as a sign the two were star-crossed never-lovers. But it turns out Lori had prime Super Bowl tickets, which kind of trounces our romantic theories.

In fact, Loughlin's delighted by Stamos' good fortune. She told Us about how she heard a baby Jesse — uh, John — was on the way: “I think he might have texted me and told me. I’m so excited for him. I’m so happy for him. They’ve wanted this. They wanted this baby. He’s wanted to have a child for a long time. So I’m so happy for them,” Loughlin said. "I’m so happy he’s going to be a dad. He’s going to be a great dad. He’s always been good with kids. And Caitlin is just the greatest girl. She’s so good for him. I’m happy to see that he’s finally found love.”

More: The Real Reason Lori Loughlin Wasn't at John Stamos' Wedding

Baby Billy — full name William Christopher Stamos after John's late father — arrived on April 10 in Los Angeles. Stamos and his wife, Caitlin McHugh, originally shared news of Billy's birth on Stamos' Instagram six days after his arrival. Stamos captioned the photo, “From now on, the best part of me will always be my wife and my son. Welcome Billy Stamos (named after my father)  #NotJustanUncleAnymore#Overjoyed.”

Stamos' father apparently left quite a legacy. Stamos talked about him during an appearance at On Air with Ryan Seacrest.

“I hope I live up to what my dad did," Stamos told Seacrest. "You know how you get to a point where you go, ‘My dad’s just a man'? I never got to that point. He was always bigger than life to me, so I’m happy to honor him with our little Billy."

We have no doubt that Stamos is going to be the same kind of fantastic papa his own dad was. Clearly, all that TV uncle-ing totally paid off.

You’ve found the perfect job… or so you think. Your skills match up nicely, you’ve got the interview, and you know you’re going to wow them. Except something feels off. Maybe it was the atmosphere of the office, maybe it was something an interviewer said, maybe it’s a question you haven’t gotten a good answer to after doing your research on the company.

Are your concerns a deal breaker? Maybe. To help you decide, SheKnows asked Monster career expert Vicki Salemi what red flags you should be on the lookout for.

1. You don’t like your prospective boss

When you have a chance to interview with the person who would be your direct supervisor, you should be evaluating how strong the chemistry is between you and how engaged they are with what you’re saying. They might be flipping through papers, answering emails or only half-listening to you, or maybe it’s subtler and you feel condescended to or disrespected.

These are all bad signs, and you shouldn’t ignore them. “Be realistic that that’s going to continue and probably get worse as an employee,” Salemi advises.

More: So, You Burned a Professional Bridge — Now What?

2. The job description is unclear

If the job description sounds up your alley but also was vague regarding what your responsibilities or role might be, and especially if during the interview, the job doesn’t become any clearer, be wary. Or as Salemi tells us, “Run, do not walk, to the exit.”

This is because not having a clear understanding of the role you’re walking into also robs you of the ability to prioritize your workload, make reasonable requests for promotion or wage increase or even functionally describe your role to a future employer.

More: Why Interning in My Mid-40s Was an Invaluable Career Move

3. The workplace vibe feels off

If you have the opportunity to see the office, you should be observing as much as possible. There are physical aspects, like whether the lighting is good or the desk spaces make sense, but there’s also the psychological culture. Do people seem happy? Do they talk to each other in a friendly manner?

“Watch and listen. See how people interact with each other,” Salemi suggests. She also says it’s worth asking your interviewers directly if they enjoy working there. If they make sarcastic jokes or snide remarks, it’s definitely bad news.

More: How to Productively Channel Your Emotions at Work

4. They’re aggressive about your history

Many states — like California, Oregon and Delaware — have banned employers from asking about your salary history, but it’s still legal in many areas. Most experts advise you to find a diplomatic way of redirecting the question or provide a range when asked. If you do this and find that they’re still pushing, it’s not a great sign. “You want to make sure they’re presenting themselves in a professional way,” Salemi says.

5. They ask intrusive questions

Questions about whether you are married, pregnant or have plans for children are against the law. Beyond being illegal, they’re also good signs a company won’t be a supportive or appropriate place to work.

But there are other questions a potential employer might ask that could be cause for concern. “Let’s say there’s a gap on your résumé, and you had a tragedy happen and you say it was a personal reason… and they continue to probe unnecessarily,” Salemi says. “[Ask yourself,] ‘Are they going to be intrusive into my personal life? Why does this matter? How is this relevant to the job?’”

6. They lack diversity & have no plans to change it

Most companies have their executive teams on their corporate pages, which can give you good insight into the kind of diversity — or lack there of — that is at the top. If there are fewer women and people of color than you’d like, it’s worth addressing at the interview.

Salemi recommends asking, “Where do you see your company in terms of diversity in the next two years, five years? How do you plan on achieving this goal?”

If they lack a reasonable answer, or worse, if they say they have goals but don’t offer any plans on how to achieve it, it could be a sign that they don’t value diverse teams, and it may be time to consider other options.

7. They’re lowballing you

It’s important to know the dollar amount your skills are worth so you can understand when you’re being offered less than is appropriate. “If they’re not putting dollars behind the quality of work they’re expecting, then that’s a red flag,” Salemi says. “They may try to say something like, 'We didn’t have a good year this year,' or 'There was a hiring freeze,' or 'We wish we could pay you more'… that’s an empty promise even if it’s in writing.”

Ultimately, Salemi says every job candidate needs to remember that you’re interviewing the employer as much as they’re interviewing you. So, she says, “If something seems off, it probably is.”

My hair journey is laden with plenty of benchmark moments, including a big chop and platinum-blond dye job. But none have been more challenging than waiting for my hair to grow out and in the process avoid over-manipulating my curls to the point of damage. The common misconception with super-short hair — textured or otherwise — is that cutting length somehow makes a day-to-day routine easier.

But if the past year has taught me anything, it’s that developing healthy hair habits takes discipline, time and plenty of trial and error. One of the biggest challenges that I and many other naturalistas face is figuring out how the heck to keep those fresh day one curls and coils intact without having to dunk our heads under the sink or shower every day.

More: 10 Absolute Best Sephora Products for Textured Hair

Steam is your friend

The wet look is appealing, and for me, addictive, but since water (especially the hot kind) opens up the hair shaft, leaving it more susceptible to damage, that type of day-to-day moisture isn’t ideal. However, that doesn’t mean your hair needs to be completely shielded from water in between washes. According to celebrity hairstylist Larry Sims, whose clients include Gabrielle Union and Zendaya, the steam produced from it is actually a big help.

“I always recommend a taking a hot, steamy shower to add moisture to your curls without getting them wet. It’s always good to use a curl-defining product to enhance the natural pattern,” he says. Product options abound — including this list of our favorites — but Sims’ go-to is the Smooth ’N Shine Curl Defining Mousse. Whether you’re using this or something else, he recommends applying a quarter-size amount — give or take depending on your length — and working from root to tip, scrunching the hair with your hand and not a brush.

More: How to Spiral Curls on Natural Hair According to YouTube

Diffuse with caution

From there, “you can air-dry naturally or use a diffuser to achieve more voluminous curls.” A diffuser is an attachment for a blow-dryer that helps disperse air more evenly over a large area, thus minimizing the intensity of heat that can disturb and destroy the curl pattern.

Regardless of the shape you use (the most common ones are flat), they should be used while the dryer is on a low heat setting and in constant movement. Again, keeping it concentrated in one area for a long time can lead to more frizz and a weak curl pattern. And if you’re doing this at night, stretch out the life of your curls even more by keeping them tucked under a satin bonnet or atop a silk/satin pillowcase to prevent them from fraying. Also, be wary of product buildup over time. In between styling, keep your scalp and strands refreshed with a clarifier like apple cider vinegar or simply stick to a clarifying shampoo on washday.

All in all, the combination of a dependable curl definer, steam and diffusion generally gets the job done. But ultimately, you’ll need a routine that’s as unique as your curl pattern, and that may include observing what others with hair like yours are doing. Ahead are the curl-defining routines of three popular bloggers with varying textures. Take notes and pay attention; you may spot a technique or product worth trying.

More: What Is Clarifying Shampoo: Everything You Need to Know

Here, blogger KandidKinks refreshes her type 4 curls using a combo of cream and oil products.

Although blogger LuhhSetty starts this tutorial with wet hair, it still provides a detailed step-by-step for those new to using diffusers. This same technique can be used on dry hair that’s been exposed to steam and a defining product.

And if you like using gel, blogger happycurlhappygirl demonstrates a water-free routine using Eco Style and flaxseed oil.

Originally posted on StyleCaster.

It’s Sunday. You’ve resigned yourself to the fact that you will be spending the day on your couch catching up on a week’s worth of saved TV shows in your DVR. You clear out all the Housewives and other reality programs, and now it’s time for a dose of good ole fiction. Scripted shows that you have loved for years. Except this episode seems a little… different. The female lead or supporting female lead is visiting a doctor she doesn’t normally see or finds herself in a situation in which she is forced to examine her own body.

Grab the tissues, friends. You’re about to enter the breast cancer arc.

This arc can last from one episode in which there is a breast cancer scare to a full season in which you watch in agony as your favorite character bravely shaves her head, gets sick while trying to give that crucial presentation at work and generally attempts to hold her life together as her breast cancer diagnosis works its way through the season.

More: 6 Times the Golden Girls Were Women's Health Pioneers

Having been through the experience of having breast cancer myself, I can spot an accurate portrayal of the condition when I see it. And for every ridiculous, unrealistic breast cancer TV moment (looking at you, ice pop and chemotherapy scene Sex and the City), there are a few that get it right. (Warning: Some minor spoilers ahead, but all for shows that have been out for a while.)

Beverly Hills, 90210

If you were a teenager growing up in the '90s, Beverly Hills, 90210 was it. You were either Team Kelly or Brenda or Team Brandon or Dylan, and you had to pick a side. The scene was set: The girls, studying for their SATs, take a break to follow a quiz in a magazine for a breast self-exam.

Brenda, upon feeling something in her breast, misses her SATs to have a biopsy. It turns out to be just a scare and all is well, but for teens watching that show, it was a good foray into the world of our bodies and what we should do if ever in that situation. Of course, it never hurts to have a boyfriend like Dylan waiting to wheel you out of the hospital.

Parenthood

Before we regularly wept at This Is Us, we had Parenthood, the story of a family in California and all of its trials and tribulations. And then Season 4 happened. Kristina Braverman, mom, wife, all around badass, receives a breast cancer diagnosis, and we, the viewers, were along for the ride, and it was rough.

This arc really depicted what it is like for a mother and wife to have to go through this disease while trying to keep her family together. Let’s not forget her video to her children in Season 4, Episode 11. All. The. Tears.

Sex and the City

Did we all cry when Samantha ripped her wig off, mid-speech, waved it in the air and the rest of the audience followed suit? Sure. While there were many problematic instances in Samantha’s breast cancer arc (see aforementioned ice pop and chemotherapy session), there was one thread in this storyline that rang very true: friendship.

While the setting of the scene was unbelievable, the idea of friends coming together and providing an amazing support system for someone with a breast cancer diagnosis was spot-on. Anyone who has just been handed a diagnosis like breast cancer would be lucky to have such a loyal group that will rally around them no matter what.

Playing House

The creator of Playing House, Jessica St. Clair was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2015 and wrote her experience into the storyline of the third season. The premise of the show has always been the relationship between St. Clair’s “Emma” and Lennon Parham’s “Maggie,” and Emma’s diagnosis does not veer from this dynamic.

Maggie is Emma’s rock, going so far as to create a cancer binder for her best friend. It’s evident that St. Clair used her real-life experience in the script, injecting humor into what is an intense and upsetting topic. Laurie Metcalf plays her surgeon and delivers one of the most accurate statements ever muttered in a breast cancer arc, “No googling. I’m the google.”

More: All the Times Seinfeld's Elaine Benes Was a Champion for Women's Health

Jane the Virgin

Telenovelas are typically fraught with drama. The brother of someone’s husband turns out to be the long-lost sister of the main character, and inevitably, someone winds up in a coma or lying face down in a pool. In the last few episodes of the most recent season of Jane the Virgin, Jane’s mother, Xiomara is diagnosed with breast cancer.

The depiction of Xo postmastectomy is one of the most realistic portrayals that has been on primetime television in a while, if ever. The drains, the pain, the exhaustion; it’s all there.

When Xo starts chemotherapy, we see another first on TV; she uses cold-cap therapy as a means of hair conservation. While this therapy was introduced years back, to my knowledge, this is the first time we see a character on television using the caps and experiencing and all the side effects that come with it — something I have experienced firsthand. From the freezing-cold body, to the support team that is needed to assist with changing the caps, it’s all very realistic and done with just the right mix of the drama, as you've come to expect in a telenovela, and all the emotion that comes with a breast cancer diagnosis.

Is watching your favorite TV character go through a trauma like breast cancer upsetting? Absolutely. But when done right, when the writers do their research, it can be a moving hour of programming that just might make you think twice about cancer.

You're still reeling from the penultimate episode of Grey's Anatomy last week — we totally get it. In fact, we're right there with you. Since the episode didn't end in utter disaster, though, we're trying to be grateful. And you know what helps? Finding out that Sarah Drew, who plays the inimitable April Kepner, won't be out of our sight for long. She may no longer roam the halls of Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital, but she's already got a new movie in the works... and it will feature a few faces very familiar to Grey's fans.

More: These Grey's Anatomy Fan Favorites Are Officially Done & We're Not OK

After Thursday's episode aired, Drew headed to Twitter to let fans in on a big secret about what's in store for the actor now that her time on Grey's has come to an end (*sob*).

"I'm super excited to share the trailer for my new film, Indivisible, which will be in theaters October 26th! I had the awesome opportunity of acting in this film and producing it as well. You'll recognize some familiar faces in the trailer!" Drew posted, along with a link to the film's teaser trailer.

The film — which has the tagline "one marriage, one family, under God" — appears to be in the vein of Christian family dramas such as 2008's Fireproof and 2015's War Room. According to the logline on IMDb, the movie follows U.S. Army chaplain Darren Turner, who returns from service only to suffer a crisis of faith and family.

More: These Behind-the-Scenes Pics of April on Grey's Anatomy Are a Lot

Here's the best part: Darren Turner is played by Grey's Justin Bruening. And you know who plays his wife, Heather Turner? None other than our girl Drew. Given that Bruening and Drew's characters on Grey's just fell back in love and survived a near-fatal car accident together, the fact that they will be starring in a feature film together as husband and wife is almost too perfect for words.

The Grey's nostalgia doesn't end there, though. Jason George, whose Ben Warren recently shifted from Grey's to the spinoff Station 19, will appear alongside Bruening and Drew as a man named Michael Turner — presumably, someone who helps Bruening's character come to terms with his crisis.

More: 10 Struggles Every Grey's Anatomy Fan Knows to Be Real

So, rejoice, Grey's fans! Yes, we're losing one of the most beloved characters in the show's history. However, we are getting something in exchange: Drew, expanding her creative scope. Hollywood needs more strong female perspectives at the helm, and we have no doubt Drew could be one of those voices.

It's been one month since Khloé Kardashian gave birth to baby girl True Thompson, and the overjoyed mama decided to make the official introduction — in a super-sweet little video, the reality star gushes over her new daughter and gives us our first full glimpse of True's face. And, y'all, she's precious.

More: Baby True Is "The Only Thing Keeping Khloé Kardashian Happy Right Now"

"Happy one month old, mama. I love you, pretty girl," Kardashian coos in the video, which focuses on True's face. A filter adorns the newborn's face, giving her freckles and a flower in her hair.

We had to listen to the video twice. We couldn't hear it the first time over the sound of our ovaries screaming. It's that cute.

True's other parent, Cleveland Cavaliers player Tristan Thompson, also opened up this week about the couple's adorable baby girl. "With a boy, it's just like, 'Hey, man. You'll be all right, man. Stop crying,' but [with True], it's like, 'True, it's gonna be OK. You know, we're right here. Daddy's here to feed you. It's me! Look, yeah!' It's way different, but it's fun, though," Thompson told fellow NBA player Richard Jefferson and sports reporter Allie Clifton on Uninterrupted's Road Trippin' podcast.

More: Things Are Worse Between Kim Kardashian & Tristan Thompson Than We Thought

Thompson also revealed that having a daughter "changes you." (Hey, here's hoping, right? Thompson has been under scrutiny since cheating allegations surfaced mere days before True's birth.)

Motherhood has clearly been transformational for Kardashian, who has been vocal over the years about her hope to have children. As with any new mom, though, her journey hasn't been without some adjustments.

"It is a struggle getting back into the groove of working out... Mentally, I'm strong, but physically it's just not the same. My body is not doing what I feel like my mind is telling it to do, so that's a struggle, but's only day one," she shared on Snapchat this week. "I need to motivate myself. It's also a struggle trying to fit in working out between feedings, no two days are the same, you know, True is great, but still, I can't predict if she's gonna sleep for the full two hours or if she's hungry."

More: The Kardashian-Jenners React to Khloé's New Arrival

The Good American designer has already explained to fans that she wants "mind, body and soul, it all to be lined up and zen, and [I'm] trying to now do this with my sweet, little baby girl."

Of course, that's entirely understandable! Figuring out how to be the best version of yourself while simultaneously raising a tiny human is tough work. But we bet Kardashian will be feeling like her old (new) self again in no time.

I’ve been using castor oil for as long as I can remember… or whenever my mom started sending me to the beauty supply store for lip gloss and ponytail holders. My strands have been slathered in it, and my precious edges have been coated in it, but that’s where my expertise begins and ends. With its thick consistency and unusual smell, I’ve never considered using it anywhere beyond my head, but surprise, surprise: People actually use this stuff on their skin too.

Before you buy a jar of Jamaican castor oil and start wearing it like a body lotion, here’s a primer on what exactly castor oil is, the number of variations it comes in and the benefits it carries.

More: The Must-Follow Celebrity Skin Care Experts on Instagram

What is it?

Castor oil is a vegetable oil derived from the castor bean that can also grow into the plant known as Ricinus communis. The plant itself can appear in many different forms, from long, glossy green leaves to reddish-purple ones with circular, spiky lobes attached.

When oil is extracted from the bean, it looks either very pale yellow or dark brown in color with an easy-to-detect smell.

More: Beyoncé’s Unusual Beauty Hack for Grease-Free Skin

The types

According to Tropic Isle Living CEO and cofounder Lois Hines, what really splits castor oil into different categories is the extraction process. The two most widely used variations are cold-pressed and Jamaican black. Cold-pressed castor oil is extracted by simply pressing the beans without heat, therefore giving the oil a clear color.

“Jamaican black castor oil is a completely different process; [It is] made by first hand-picking wild organic castor beans and then allowing them to dry so that the seeds will pop out of the pods,” she says. “After the seeds are gathered, they are roasted, then pounded into mulch using a mortar. The mulch is later emptied into a large pot to which water is added. The pot and its contents are then laid on a slow-burning wood fire. The contents are continuously stirred, and as the oil rises to the surface, it is skimmed off.”

After the initial skim, it will go through additional phases of this to ensure it’s completely devoid of water. A couple more stirs will leave you with ultra-pure light- to dark-brown JBCO. If a castor oil product is labeled “virgin” or “organic,” that simply refers to how the beans were grown (Hines’ Tropic Isle Living uses a mixture of wild-grown and organic beans).

More: Top-Notch Products for a Cleaner Beauty Routine

The hair benefits

Castor oil, regardless of how it’s extracted, contains omega-9 fatty acids (mainly ricinoleic acid), which is where most of its health and beauty benefits stem from. JBCO is particularly renowned for its emollient properties, meaning it absorbs easily into the skin, scalp included. Once there, it can improve blood circulation, reduce flaking and itch and lock in moisture.

“We know that Jamaican black castor oil has many benefits in the hair, including the cleansing of toxins from hair and scalp, repairing dry hair, serving as a great moisture sealant for texturized hair, stimulating hair growth and thickness (like in our Tropic Isle Living Strong Roots line) and adding sheen to the hair,” says Hines.

Castor oil, Jamaican black or otherwise, can be a little heavy on fine or fragile hair, but your hair’s porosity — or its ability to retain moisture — is what will determine whether it can handle castor oil or not. In that case, you can opt for a specially made lighter blend or not at all.

More: Skin Care Ingredients That Don’t Play Nice Together

The skin benefits

Hines also cites castor oil as a traditionally known all-purpose healing oil. “It is also a carrier oil, which means that it will mix well with other oils as well as help carry nutrients of these oils when mixed properly,” she says. That’s an especially important trait for sensitive skin types to remember, since using castor oil in its purest form may overwhelm and cause irritation.

In addition to serving as an intense moisturizer for people with drier skin, it can also be utilized as a de-puffer under the eyes or within an oil-cleansing regimen to treat acne. And although Jamaicans have used the oil as a laxative, Hines recommends sticking to topical formulas. Lastly, since castor oil is derived from a bean, some of which share properties with certain tree nuts, people with nut allergies (or bean/legume allergies) should be careful and consult with a doctor before making the oil a regular part of their beauty routine.

Ahead are seven of the most popular castor oil-infused beauty products out today, including a pick from Tropic Isle Living.

More: 10 Game-Changing Skin Care Tips for Black Women

Bumble and bumble Brilliantine

An oil-based styling cream made to add polish, hold and sheen to thick straight or curly hair.

Brilliantine, $24 at Bumble and bumble

Caudalie Make-up Removing Cleansing Oil

Even waterproof makeup is no match for this silky, smooth formula that dissolves makeup without leaving a greasy film behind.

Make-up Removing Cleansing Oil, $28 at Caudalie

Madam CJ Walker Jamaican Black Castor Pure Clarifying Shampoo w/ ACV

Combined with the antiseptic properties of apple cider vinegar, this shampoo strips the strands and scalp of buildup without taking away natural oils.

Madam CJ Walker Jamaican Black Castor Pure Clarifying Shampoo w/ ACV, $18 at Sephora

Oyin Handmade Nourishing Lip Balm in Honey Stick

Apply a thin layer of this honey- and oil-infused formula to your kissers for moisture that’ll last from sunup to sundown.

Nourishing Lip Balm in Honey Stick, $4 at Oyin Handmade

SheaMoisture Jamaican Black Castor Oil Strengthen & Restore Treatment Masque

A Jamaican black castor oil-infused hair treatment for strands that need an intense boost of hydration outside of the normal shampoo sesh.

SheaMoisture Jamaican Black Castor Oil Strengthen & Restore Treatment Masque, $13.49 at Ulta

Tropic Isle Living Jamaican Black Castor Oil

JBCO, extracted from organic and wild-grown castor beans in Jamaica — the best of the best!

Jamaican Black Castor Oil, $12.99 at Tropic Isle Living

Vernon François Re~Vamp Mid Length Repair Cream

An intense repair agent created by the man who regularly styles Lupita Nyong’o’s hair.

Re~Vamp Mid Length Repair Cream, $33 at Vernon François

Originally posted on StyleCaster.

Vacations are an amazing way to get away from it all — to refresh, recharge, explore — or whatever your little heart desires. While packing up and heading out of town can be tons of fun, you of course have to eat. While it's super-easy to pop into whatever restaurant you can find while you're on the go, it may not be the healthiest choice. We spoke with nutrition experts to find out how you can avoid eating like garbage while on vacay.

Try not to stress

While eating healthful foods on vacation is a good goal to have, try not to stress over every single calorie or gram while you're away, Sunny Brigham, a board-certified clinical and integrative nutritionist, tells SheKnows. "I usually tell people that being on vacation is a great time to relax, de-stress and get the body functioning how it was meant to function," she says.

Start every meal with veggies

Having said that, there are a few ways you can avoid consuming tons of crap (which, let's face it, is pretty easy to do when you're too busy or unable to cook).

More: How to Deal With Travel Anxiety so It Doesn't Ruin Your Trip

"Start every meal with vegetables," says Brigham. "You can indulge in the local fare and let your hair down if you start filling your belly with nutrients first. If you eat a salad or a serving of broccoli before you dive into that spaghetti Bolognese, you're going to eat less of it."

Order groceries ahead of time

Another strategy is to virtually scan what's available near where you're staying and plan ahead. Registered dietitian Denine Cimmons Stracker tells SheKnows people may want to consider placing a small online grocery order at a nearby grocery and having it delivered to your hotel room on the day you arrive. This will keep you on the right path nutrition-wise and won't lead to food purchases later that are more costly, devoid of real nutrition and that you'll likely regret.

"I recommend buying a few staple foods like fresh fruit, unsalted nuts, canned tuna, whole-wheat bread, apricots, raisins or yogurt," Cimmons Stracker explains. "These can power up your morning before stepping out the door or fill the gaps between meals during long days of sightseeing." Hotel rooms that have an in-room fridge are an added bonus, which can make it easier to stay healthy.

Avoid crappy snacks

Although they're convenient, filler snacks may not be the best option while you're on holiday, Dr. Garth Graham, cardiologist and president of the Aetna Foundation, tells SheKnows. "Enjoy meals on vacation, but don't waste calories, saturated fats and other toxins on snacks," he says. "Treat yourself, but choose lighter options in between meals instead."

Check out menus before you go out to eat

With a smartphone in hand, it's easier than ever to check out a restaurant's menu before you step out the door, Anna Brown, an integrative nutritionist, tells SheKnows. Many restaurants have online menus, and from there you can scope out what's offered and have a healthy game plan in place.

More: Unique Wellness Retreats That Go Beyond R&R

"I like to order plant-based entrées like a salad and then add a side of lean protein like salmon, grilled chicken or legumes," she says. "If the restaurant doesn't have a plant-based option, just make a meal out of vegetable sides."

Pack your own snacks

Brown also suggests packing your own snacks (although, if you're hoping to bring along liquids and are hopping on a plane, check out the airline rules about restrictions that might mean your snacks get tossed in the trash before you board).

"I like carrots or celery with hummus, apple with peanut butter or RXBars because they have a lot of protein and no added sugar," she says.

You can enjoy some indulgences

While it's important to eat as healthily as possible while you're on your travels, you don't have to completely avoid the good stuff, especially if it's a local delicacy, Carol Thelen, a certified registered nurse practitioner at Mercy Medical Center in Baltimore, tells SheKnows.

"If the location is known for a special food, such as gelato in Italy, don't feel bad to indulge in a small treat," she notes. In fact, it'd be almost a crime to do without.

Bottom line

So, while it's easier to just eat whatever you want while you're away, it's a better idea to keep these tips in mind and plan ahead before heading out — but don't forget to treat yourself if you want to.

I was eight months pregnant and on my way home from my job as a kindergarten teacher. The seatbelt under my huge belly was pushing on my bladder, and I was wondering how I could possibly make it to my due date a month away, because it didn’t seem like I could get any larger.

I knew exactly what I wanted for my son's all-natural delivery. I had read every book on natural birth, and I was only giving birth at a hospital because my husband was wary of home births. I’d bought hypnobirthing CDs, and I'd made a playlist of relaxing music. I was prepared. I had a plan, and I was sticking to it. But then I got hit by a truck.

I remember glancing in the rearview mirror just in time to think, "That truck is really close," before it plowed into the back of my car, slamming me into the car in front of me.

More:  Why My 1-Year-Old Sleeps on the Floor

Then, the only thing I could think was, "The baby, the baby, the baby." I clutched my enormous stomach and, although I could feel my own heartbeat pounding in my ears, I couldn't feel any movement in my belly. My baby, who was usually very active, was still. "Oh, my God," I thought, "He’s gone. This is it. This is how my otherwise perfect pregnancy ends; I lose my baby boy." I was crying before I realized I was crying.

I stared at the burn the seatbelt had left across my chest and collarbone, but I didn’t register any pain. There was blood on my hand, although I couldn’t figure out where it was coming from until I looked in the mirror and saw my nose was bleeding. Then a teenage boy appeared at my car window.

“Are you alright?” he asked, before looking down at my swollen belly and muttering, “Oh, shit."

The kid called 911 while I called my husband. The police arrived and an officer approached my window. Before he could say anything, I blurted out, “I’m pregnant!” even though I’m pretty sure a blind person could have seen that.

“I can see that,” he said. “Take a breath. We don’t want that baby to come out right now.” 

I rode in the ambulance to the hospital, where I was given an ultrasound immediately. An article I read later at SafeRide4Kids said that 3,000 pregnancies are lost every year from car crashes, and according to a 1998 study for the Association for the Advancement of Automotive Medicine, there are plenty more adverse fetal outcomes from crashes, such as disabilities that arise from fetal injuries in utero.

My nurses kept trying to be reassuring, saying the baby was moving around, no fluid was leaking, and the ultrasound didn’t give any indication there was anything wrong — but ultimately, we’d have to just wait and see. Just wait and see?? After incessant questioning, the nurse admitted that we couldn't be sure there were lasting injuries until the baby was born.

Three days later, I went to my OB to have a follow-up appointment, and during the ultrasound, the tech was very quiet. She did all the measurements and looked around the placenta thoroughly before giving me a smile.

"You can breathe now," she said, and I realized I’d been holding my breath. "He looks great," she continued, "Everything looks good. You’re really lucky. There’s just one tiny thing..."

"Oh no," I thought with dread. "What now?"

She explained that the baby, who had been head-down throughout my pregnancy, had flipped and was now breech, likely from the trauma of the car accident.

More:  Outrageous C-Section Myths, Busted

She added that we'd need to talk about scheduling a C-section. "You’re over eight months along," she explained, "So there’s not a whole lot of room in there for him to move around, but it’s still a possibility.’

I thought I’d be sad about this news — and the demise of my hard-fought natural-birth plan — but instead, I was surprised by the wave of anger that swept over me. "A C-section?? This wasn’t what was supposed to happen! I had a plan!!" I went home and bawled.

I tried yoga positions, went to the YMCA pool every single day in hopes that the weightlessness of being in water would help, tried acupuncture and even some ancient Chinese burning-a-bundle-of-herbs-by-your-pinkie-toe thing. I went to the OB two weeks later resigned to my fate. He hadn’t flipped. I tried to act nonchalant as the doctor scheduled my C-section, handed over a packet of instructions and gave me a sterile orange sponge I was told I would need to scrub my belly with in the shower the night before the surgery.

I managed to walk back through the waiting room, past all the expectant moms and hold it together until I got to my car. As soon as I closed the car door, I burst into tears and called my husband.

“How’d it go?” he asked cheerfully.

In between incoherent wails, I blubbered, “They... gave... me... a... SPONGE!!”

I was beside myself. I’d heard horror stories about C-sections, the brutal recovery, the incision site reopening, being bedridden for weeks — a vlogger I’d followed through her entire pregnancy, Connie Kin, had died suddenly due to complications from her C-section. Meanwhile, I'd never broken a bone or had stitches or even twisted my ankle. I was totally unprepared to be a hospital patient — and I was terrified.

As the date of the C-section approached, I tried to wrap my head around what was about to happen to me. I googled "what to bring in your hospital bag for a C-section" and repacked my bag accordingly. I researched how to bond with your child during C-section recovery, what the most comfortable clothing to wear afterward was and what products to use to minimize scarring.

Finally, after days of research and hearing positive C-section birth stories from friends and family, I came to terms with the fact that I was going to have a C-section — and I was surprised to find I was actually OK with it. I could even try for a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) with my next child.

So, I went in for the final ultrasound right before my surgery. The ultrasound tech raised her eyebrow.

"You’re not going to believe this," she said.

I braced myself for the worst. A complication from the car accident has arisen. There's bleeding in the placenta. He's grown another head. But what she said next made me cry with joy: The baby had flipped. He was head down. I'd be able to have my natural birth plan after all.

When I left the doctor’s office, I gleefully placed the orange sponge on the receptionist’s desk and practically danced out the door.

More:  Everything You Need to Know About C-Sections

That very night, I started having contractions, and the next afternoon, my son was born — thanks to modern medicine and, yep, drugs.

I’d gone from a hoped-for home birth to a drug-free all-natural hospital birth to a planned C-section to a vaginal hospital birth with an epidural and an episiotomy. And what did I learn? That things never go according to plan. I learned that the best plan to have when it comes to birthing a human is no plan.

So, if you’re about to do just that (make a birth plan) take my advice: Plan for a healthy baby. Plan for an uncontrollable desire to stare at them while they sleep. Plan for endless hours of kisses and studying their face and the overwhelming urge to squish them to pieces. Expect the unexpected. When you make a plan, the universe laughs, right? So enjoy the unpredictable.

After all, when you have a kid, your life will never be predictable again. And isn’t that one of the best parts?

Fans have missed Lisa Vanderpump on social media in recent weeks, but the reason for the Bravo star's absence may have just come to light: Per the Daily Mail, her brother, Mark Vanderpump, was found dead at his home in Gloucestershire, England, on April 30. He was 59. The suspected cause of death is reportedly a drug overdose.

More: Lisa Vanderpump's Husband Has to Stop Disrespecting the Other Housewives

In a statement to the UK outlet, Lisa expressed both grief and surprise. "This has come as a shock to us all," she said. "My brother and I had connected the day before this tragedy and I was completely unprepared for this. He was my only sibling and I am shocked and saddened by his passing. I am trying to be supportive to his two young sons that he has left behind, and help them get through this tragedy. We appreciate your consideration in this private and extremely difficult family time."

Mark, who worked as a DJ, appeared to hold his sister in high regard, posting pictures of the pair on social media with affectionate captions and retweeting news about her TV series, The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and Vanderpump Rules. The siblings occasionally vacationed together, and Mark reportedly frequented his sister's Los Angeles area restaurants.

At this time, it is not known whether Mark's suspected drug overdose was accidental or intentional. According to the Daily Mail, though, a UK family member who wished to remain anonymous said of Lisa's recently divorced brother, "After 22 years of marriage, Mark was living a very colorful life until it all sadly went wrong."

More: People Are Crowning Lisa Vanderpump American Royalty

Other details about Mark's life that have emerged since his death are alleged legal troubles and his appearance on a UK documentary called Gold Diggers and Proud. (To be clear, Mark was not a "gold digger" — an ITV logline for the show quoted him as saying he was "happy to spoil pretty women with gifts.")

Lisa's representatives have not yet responded to numerous outlets' requests for comment. Our deepest condolences go out to the family during this heartbreaking time.

Ugh, say it isn't so! One week shy of Meghan Markle's royal nuptials to Prince Harry, the bride's dad has been accused of staging "wedding prep" photos in order to make money. Poor Meghan can't catch a break where family drama is concerned, and this is the latest in a long line of sordid attempts by distant relatives to cash in on her happiness.

More: Everything We Know About Meghan Markle & Prince Harry's Wedding So Far

It all started with a string of seemingly innocuous — and kind of adorable, in a proud dad way — photographs showing Thomas Markle gearing up for his daughter's big day: from getting measured for his suit to studying up on her new country by poring over a book titled Images of Britain.

However, photo editors suspected foul play and reportedly have gotten their confirmation. Per the UK's Daily Mail on Sunday, CCTV footage proves Thomas staged and posed for these photographs to sell to newspapers around the world.

In the footage, Thomas is seen meeting with photographer Jeff Rayner and preparing for the photos, which would ultimately be passed off as candid shots. Images obtained by the Daily Mail show the pair meeting on March 27 at an internet cafe in Rosarito, Mexico, where Thomas reportedly lives.

More: Is Prince Harry Signing a Prenup Before Marrying Meghan Markle?

"The man and the photographer came in together. It was in the morning. They didn't stay long, probably about 10 minutes, and they left together. I thought it was strange that they were taking pictures in here. It's an unusual place to take pictures," Jessica Anaya, the cafe's manager, told the Daily Mail.

In one of the more widely publicized photos, Thomas can be seen being measured by a "tailor" for the suit he would presumably wear to walk his daughter down the aisle. However, the Daily Mail alleges that the tailor is actually David Flores, a 17-year-old student who works part-time in a party supply rental shop. Flores stated that Thomas and Rayner showed up with their own tape measure, asked him to take Thomas' measurements and then tipped him about $15 for his help.

"I just went along with it," Flores told the outlet. "I was telling him the measurements but he didn’t write them down or anything."

Adding insult to injury? Mere hours before Thomas was exposed for the secret collusion, his own representatives reached out to media organizations globally to stress to editors that he was "suffering" from the media's intrusion into his life. Kensington Palace officials also reached out on Thomas' behalf, expressing frustration over how Meghan's father had been "followed and harassed" by paparazzi and asking for it to stop.

More: Royal Rules Meghan Markle Will Have to Abide By After Marrying Prince Harry

All told, Thomas reportedly stands to gain upwards of $150,000 for the photos that have been published so far. However, it's also possible Thomas participated in the photo shoots in a misguided attempt to get paparazzi off his back by beating them to the punch.

According to the Daily Beast, Kensington Palace did not respond to a request for comment. The outlet did say, though, that it would appear Thomas will still walk Meghan down the aisle.

It's official: Drew Scott and Linda Phan are now husband and wife. The HGTV star said "I do" to his lovely bride whilst on their glorious Italian destination wedding on May 12. The time leading up to this wedding has been an exciting one, with Scott and Phan making all the necessary albeit unconventional steps to prep, like taking dancing lessons and filming a TV show about building their first home as a couple, before hopping on a flight to Italy.

More: All the Celebrity Couples Who Recently Said I Do

People magazine provided an exclusive look at the Scott-Phan wedding over the weekend, including the couple's first comments about how they were feeling post-wedding ceremony.

"We are still floating on clouds… today couldn’t have been more magical," Scott and Phan told the magazine. "Surrounded by so many loved ones in such a beautiful place was unreal. We are very, very lucky. Friends, family, amazing food, blue skies and being even more in love than ever before — what more could we ask for?"

The couple's wedding included 300 guests, friends and family who reportedly flew in from all over the world, including the United States, Canada, Scotland and Latin America. Ahead of Saturday's wedding festivities, both sets of bridal parties participated in various bachelor and bachelorette excursions and activities to get in the festive mood, including "a bicycle tour and cooking classes," per People.

More: The One Thing Drew Scott Is So Excited to Do at His Wedding

The way People describes this wedding, it sounds like a total dream come true (as if it wasn't already spectacular to get married in Italy!). Phan's dresses for both the ceremony and the reception were designed by Claire Pettibone and featured beautiful colorful floral detailing on the shoulder and sleeves. Scott opted for a kilt and jacket for the wedding ceremony but slipped into a custom tuxedo for the reception.

The pair's (hopefully) amazing wedding cake will actually be seen on June 25 episode of Cake Hunters on Food Network, so keep an eye out for that. Additionally, Scott and Phan gifted their guests with some seriously cool swag: "two travel bags designed by Lug, plus custom pizza cutters and plates," according to People.

For Scott and Phan, their wedding wasn't just about celebrating one special day; it was about making this milestone moment last as special and as long as possible. "There was never a thought of doing anything else for both of us. A whole week to hang out on a beach, enjoy each others’ company: that sounded like the perfect wedding to us," Scott told People.

More: Drew Scott & Linda Phan's First Wedding Dance Will Have a DWTS Twist

Scott and Phan are choosing to keep their honeymoon location a secret, but you know what? They've totally earned it, considering how deeply they let us, their fans, in on their wedding planning process. This wedding sounds like something out of a fairytale and from the comments from the newlyweds about this special day, we're pretty sure it actually was a fairytale for them, too.

At long last, spring is in the air, the sun is out, and the flowers are starting to bloom. After that seemingly never-ending winter, what could be better? Well, for the millions of people who suffer from seasonal allergies, the aforementioned springtime air, flora and fauna aren't quite as much of a delight.

In addition to miserable symptoms including congestion, sneezing, itching, watery eyes and respiratory problems, you may have noticed you're way more tired than usual during allergy season — even when you don't take an over-the-counter medication like Benadryl to alleviate your symptoms.

More: What You Can Do to Prepare for Allergy Season Now

As it turns out, your allergies can be the culprit responsible for the fatigue as well. Dr. Tania Elliott, a board-certified allergist and internist, tells SheKnows that chemicals released by allergy cells can cause exhaustion. "They also cause buildup of fluid and inflammation in your sinuses, which can cause facial pressure, headaches and fatigue," Elliott explains.

But the major reason allergies cause fatigue is fairly straightforward: Difficulty breathing leads to sleep disruptions and disturbed sleep. "This difficulty breathing, especially while lying down, is caused by tightened airways from congested nasal cavities — a direct result of the inflammatory reaction of allergen exposure," Elliott says.

More: Is It True Your Allergies Change Every 7 Years?

The congested nasal cavities that are responsible for these sleep disruptions can be caused by both outdoor and indoor allergies. "Believe it or not, many indoor allergens — such as dust mites, pet dander and mold — tend to settle in the bedroom," Elliott says. (Yikes.)

Furthermore, dust mites frequently live in your bedding, so it's no surprise that so many people with allergies wake up feeling completely unrested, exhausted and (of course) congested. If you have a dust mite allergy, Elliott recommends removing all the decorative pillows from your bed and washing your sheets on high heat weekly.

For allergy sufferers with carpets in their bedrooms, Elliott suggests using a HEPA vacuum weekly or getting rid of the carpeting altogether. “Remember, first things first when it comes to allergy treatment — identify and avoid your triggers,” she says.

More: Are Your Cold Symptoms Actually Just Allergies?

If fatigue often accompanies your allergies, Elliott recommends seeking a form of nondrowsy allergy relief. She notes that it's important to remember that not all over-the-counter medications are created equal, and there are varying side effects that require our close attention.

Elliott suggests nasal steroid sprays. "They act locally at the site of allergy symptoms — your nasal passages — and will minimize congestion, swelling [and] postnasal drip and help you breathe better," she explains. "I prefer medicines that work locally vs. systemically, which is what happens when you take pills." Just remember that nasal steroid sprays like Flonase take at least five days to take effect, so stick with the program in order to get yourself on a path to better sleep.

“Ultimately, by minimizing the allergens settling in the bedroom and being mindful of taking nondrowsy allergy medications, you will likely begin to experience a more restful night’s sleep,” Elliott says.

You may not be able to stop and smell the roses, but at least you won’t start the day feeling completely unrefreshed and exhausted. Allergy season is looking up at least a little bit, right?

We’re grateful that sun protection has evolved past the smelly creams and sprays our parents would make us apply as children. Unfortunately, we still need someone — anyone, really — to remind us that wearing SPF doesn’t have a cutoff age. Sunscreen isn’t the sexiest product in our beauty arsenal, but with sun exposure rising to dangerous levels (hello, global warming!) and the always-looming threat of skin-related disease, there are simply no excuses.

Even if you’re running out the door every morning and forget to apply sun protection somewhere between your moisturizer and foundation, setting sprays and powders are the clutch last-minute skin saviors that may not cover your entire body, but at least shield your face from the elements. Whether you prefer a dewy setting spray or matte powder, ahead are the best-selling finishers with SPF for when you forget to slather on the sunscreen.

More: 5 Sunscreens That Don’t Leave a Chalky Cast on Brown Skin

bareMinerals Mineral Veil Setting Powder Broad Spectrum SPF 25

This loose powder is available in translucent or tinted form to protect the skin from UVA/UVB rays while blurring the appearances of lines and creases under makeup. Talc-free and dermatologically tested, it also absorbs oil without stripping the skin of moisture.

Mineral Veil setting powder broad-spectrum SPF 25, $23 at bareMinerals

Ilia Flow-Thru Radiant Translucent Powder SPF 20

Expect just a hint of luminosity when you apply this lightweight vegan formula over makeup that needs help staying put. The open-and-close function of the brush applicator also makes it the perfect on-the-go travel companion for your purse.

Flow-Thru Radiant Translucent Powder SPF 20, $34 at Ilia

More: The Best Clinical-Strength Deodorants for Fighting BO

Peter Thomas Roth Oily Problem Skin Instant Mineral SPF 30

If you're prone to greasy skin during the spring/summer seasons, this talc-free matte powder absorbs excess oil while also protecting the skin as it’s exposed to the sun and other environmental stressors.

Peter Thomas Roth Oily Problem Skin Instant Mineral SPF 30, $30 at Sephora

AmorePacific Resort Collection Sun Protection Mist Broad Spectrum SPF 30 

This luxurious formula is chock-full of skin-saving ingredients, including plum extract for healing heat damage, matsutake mushroom and bamboo sap for moisture and, of course, ample sun protection.

More: The 7 Best SPF-Filled Tinted Moisturizers We’re Obsessed With

Coola Organic SPF 30 Makeup Setting Spray

Made with 70 percent certified-organic ingredients, hyaluronic acid (for moisture) and aloe vera (for calming irritation), this setting spray is for anyone who doesn’t want to sacrifice their makeup for the beach or other setting with excess sun exposure.

Organic SPF 30 Makeup Setting Spray, $36 at Coola

Dr Dennis Gross Sheer Mineral Sun Spray SPF 50

This water-resistant formula, free of chemical fillers, is built to last through two hours of physical activity. Even if your skin is already wet, the formula dries sheer without leaving a tinted residue behind.

Sheer Mineral Sun Spray SPF 50, $42 at Dr Dennis Gross

Hampton Sun SPF 55 Continuous Mist

The oil-free formula, enhanced with the brand’s signature Privet Bloom scent, sprays lightly and evenly onto the skin, providing your makeup or bare skin with a silky feel and sun protection too.

SPF 55 Continuous Mist, $32 at Hampton Sun

Shiseido Ultimate Sun Protection Spray Broad Spectrum SPF 50+

This SPF shield can be used on bare skin or over makeup to provide sun protection in and out of water. It’s also nonsticky, so if you’re playing in the sand, you needn’t worry about making a mess.

Ultimate Sun Protection Spray Broad Spectrum SPF 50+, $36 at Shiseido

Supergoop! Invincible Setting Powder SPF 45

Mattify your makeup and brush on sun protection with this sweat-resistant formula housed in a travel-friendly brush applicator.

Invincible Setting Powder SPF 45, $30 at Supergoop!

Originally posted on StyleCaster.