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Anthony Bourdain Has Complicated Views on Veganism

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If you thought the tides were turning toward plant foods after Gordon Ramsay added a vegan pizza to his new London restaurant's menu, well… not so fast. Anthony Bourdain just let loose his views on veganism to Eater after being asked about the latest wave-making meatless concoction, the Impossible Burger. And his views were… mixed.

“Look, there are a lot of hungry people in the world,” he told the publication. “I guess if [it] is a means of providing must-needed protein to people who need protein to live, I guess I’m all for it.”

More: How to Make Your Favorite Starbucks Bakery Items at Home

Bourdain also admits he hasn’t tried the burger himself. “As somebody who spent 30 years as a chef, of course I’m going to be resistant to the notion that there’s any replacement for the texture and musculature and funk of real meat,” he said, and then added the real whopper: “It makes me fearful of a Soylent Green future.”

More: Is Gordon Ramsay Going Vegan? It’s Not What You Think

Soylent Green is, of course, the name of the 1973 apocalyptic movie (and the meal product that serves as the movie’s main focus) in which you find out that everyone who’s been eating Soylent Green has, in fact, been eating ground-up people. Admittedly, the reference doesn't quite make sense for vegans, whose whole jam is avoiding all animal products, often with the aim of reducing suffering. People are animals, after all.

More: Prince William Reveals the One Fast-Food Chain He Loves

It’s not the first time Bourdain has spoken against plant-based diets. In Kitchen Confidential, he wrote, “To me, life without veal stock, pork fat, sausage, organ meat, demi-glace, or even stinky cheese is a life not worth living. Vegetarians are the enemy of everything good and decent in the human spirit, and an affront to all I stand for, the pure enjoyment of food.”

As far as the Impossible Burger, not that you asked, but I’ve tried it myself and it’s pretty tasty. Not a meat substitute by any means and probably not the best vegan or vegetarian burger I’ve tried. But hardly an affront to the pure enjoyment of food.


Sarah Jessica Parker Still Wants to Clarify the 'Catfight' With Kim Cattrall

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The now-infamous alleged feud between former Sex and the City costars Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Cattrall may look and sound like a catfight, but one thing is for sure: It is not a catfight. At least that’s the message Parker is desperate for everyone to understand, as evidenced in a recent interview the SATC alum did with Vulture while promoting her new movie, Blue Night.

MoreKim Cattrall's Boyfriend From Sex and the City Just Betrayed Her

When the conversation turned to the question of resolving the alleged tension with Cattrall, Parker said, "I’d just like to remind everybody that there is no catfight. I have never uttered an unkind, unsupportive, unfriendly word, so I would love to redefine it.” It has to be frustrating to have your every move scrutinized, and we don’t blame Parker if she is a little tired of pushing back against rumors.

So, why do the rumors of a catfight persist? It seemed that things had died down until 2017, when Cattrall made a very public jab at Parker. In the wake of her brother’s untimely death, Parker apparently reached out to Cattrall, who was having none of it. She posted a statement on her Instagram that seemed to reignite the alleged feud between them.

Kim Catrall Instagram

Kim Catrall Instagram

If you need to get fully caught up, The Cut has a comprehensive timeline of the alleged feud. That said, we can’t help but look back to 2009 when the rumors began and feel like the tension between these women has always been pretty real. Back then, an article in New York Magazine surfaced in which a source claimed tensions existed on the set of the second SATC feature-length film. This got the rumor mill going, and Cattrall has declined the offer to play Samantha in a third movie. As she told Piers Morgan, the SATC chapter her life was closed, and at 61 years old, it was time to move on.

More: Kim Cattrall Doesn't Want Sarah Jessica Parker's Sympathies

Cattrall has also rejected the notion of a feud (previous to her shady 2017 Instagram), telling The Daily Mail in 2010, "It makes for juicy gossip. The truth of us being friends and getting along and happily doing our jobs together is nowhere near as newsworthy. I think Sarah is fantastic. She is a born leader and she guides the crew and the cast in such a strong but gentle way. She and I are sick of this. It’s exhausting talking about it, and a real bore."

More: 21st-Century Celebrity Feuds People Will Be Talking About in 100 Years

In the end, who can we believe? It almost doesn't matter because even though we've been put through what feels like a never-ending cycle of makeups and breakups with these former costars, Parker seems to have put the kibosh on it once and for all.

Kym Johnson & Robert Herjavec Welcome Twins

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What do you get when you cross a pro dancer with a shark investor? Twins, apparently. Dancing with the Stars pro Kym Johnson and husband Robert Herjavec of Shark Tank welcomed twins on Monday — the same day Prince William and the Duchess of Cambridge welcomed a new baby prince.

More: We Grilled Robert Herjavec About Baby Plans With Kym Johnson

Johnson posted the news on Instagram. “I never thought my heart could feel so full. We’re so in love with our little angels. Born at 7.44am and 7.45am 4/23/18,” she captioned a black-and-white photo of Herjavec holding the babies.

Kym Johnson

Kym Johnson

Johnson told fans in December 2017 that she was pregnant — via an ultrasound photo on Instagram. The next day, a source told Us Weekly that Johnson and Herjavec were expecting twins.

kym us

kym us

Johnson also revealed on her Instagram that the twins are a boy and a girl.

kym gender

kym gender

Johnson and Herjavec were partners on the 20th season of DWTS and married a year later in Los Angeles. According to Johnson, Herjavec doted on her during the pregnancy. In January, she told Us Weekly about the baby shower her husband had planned for her. “[Robert] is the best. He spoiled me with a trip back home to Australia to see all my girlfriends,” she raved. “There was a little baby shower and saw my family and stuff so that was nice. I feel really good. I’ve been keeping active and I think I’ll probably slow down now. I’m in the last trimester. I feel like I’m about to explode.”

More: Popular IVF Myths: Separating Fact From Fiction

The shower was pure joy for Johnson, a native of Australia. She said in the same interview, “Oh my gosh, all my girlfriends gave me some really good Australian books, with Australian native animals. I want the kids to know their heritage and that was really sweet, to have those books to be able to read to them. There was some Aussie onesies and things like that, that you can only get in Australia. That was sweet.”

Johnson told People she conceived via IVF and that these are her "miracle" twins. Herjavec also has three children from his previous marriage. Congrats to the ballroom duo — and good luck with the 2 a.m. diaper quickstep.

Giada De Laurentiis Is Taking Huge Steps to Empower Women in 2018

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Giada De Laurentiis: charming Food Network star (and Food Network Star host), Italian chef extraordinaire, cookbook author — and, now, the face, brains and heart behind a new gourmet popcorn line.

In partnership with Simply 7, De Laurentiis' new line boasts authentic Italian flavors and clean ingredients and comes in three flavors: sea salt and olive oil, Parmesan cheese, and butter. The best part about the popcorn line, though? It helps support women pursuing careers in agriculture too.

Giada De Laurentiis popcorn line IG post

Giada De Laurentiis popcorn line IG post

"As a mother and woman who achieved success in a male-dominated industry, I feel strongly about supporting and encouraging women in all aspects of their life," De Laurentiis told SheKnows, "and am especially committed to helping women in food-related industries."

Proceeds from the sale of the popcorn will benefit the Fund Her Farm initiative, which inspires new generations of female farmers by donating to organizations that help fund scholarships, programs and events that empower female farmers across the United States. The long-term goal? To eventually source all corn from female farmers.

"People don't realize how many farms are actually run by women," she said, "and I wanted to do my part to bring attention to that and to the need to inspire future generations of farmers to keep fostering the tradition of bringing high-quality ingredients to our tables."

We spoke to De Laurentiis further about why she believes it's so important for female farmers to become the sole source of corn for her brand, her career advice to women in farming, which popcorn is daughter Jade's favorite and so much more.

More: 14 Things About Giada De Laurentiis You Probably Never Knew

SheKnows: You are quoted as saying that women farmers are the best at what they do. In what ways?

Giada De Laurentiis: Women are natural nurturers, so it makes sense that women in agricultural industries will give that extra care and attention to cultivate a very high-quality product. I think it's less about one group being better than another, and more about women farmers needing to get the credit they deserve for the significant role they play in their industry.

SK: Why is it important to you that female farmers become your brand's sole source of corn?

GD: For me, it's about using this opportunity with Simply 7 to help female farmers gain more visibility and shining a spotlight on all of the amazing work they do to get the food we eat on our tables. When I was in Peru, I was lucky enough to meet with several women who had taken over their families' farms once the men moved to find jobs in the city. It was such an inspiring thing to witness and motivated me all the more to offer my support. I think we're experiencing an exciting time in our history where women everywhere are looking to rally around each other, and this initiative with Simply 7 is a way for me to do just that.

SK: Which popcorn flavor is your daughter Jade's favorite?

GD: One thing that is so important to me as a mom is finding food for my daughter made with ingredients I feel great about, so it's been so meaningful for me to work with a company like Simply 7 that takes such care and attention choosing the ingredients in its products. On top of that, for our popcorn collaboration, I was able to incorporate flavors that reflect my Italian heritage.

Jade loves to snack on the butter flavor made with organic, clarified butter from pasture-raised cows. It's such a classic flavor, and the use of blue and red heritage corn gives it a nuttier flavor and texture that really elevates it compared to other brands. In addition to snacking on it, she likes when I toast the popcorn just a bit and toss it into some of her favorite dishes — on top of a Caesar salad or creamy tomato soup — to add an extra crunch.

Giada De Laurentiis and Jade IG post

Giada De Laurentiis and Jade IG post

SK: As Jade grows up, how do you see your career and lifestyle changing? How will your goals as a parent change?

GD: I think the older Jade gets, the more I find myself wanting to do more to lift other women up and do my part to effect change and create a world where she will have more opportunities. I've always been involved in various charitable projects, but more recently, I've been thinking about how I can make my mark to affect change in the world, and I look for projects — like the Fund Her Farm partnership with Simply 7 — that will help me do just that.

More: Giada De Laurentiis Opens Up About Her Rocky Relationship With Bobby Flay

SK: What women have empowered you and how?

GD: Growing up in my family, there was a lot of emphasis put on encouraging the men to have drive to do something big with their lives and careers. For the women, there weren't a lot of expectations beyond getting married and starting a family. That is why my Aunt Raffy [Raffaella De Laurentiis], a successful Hollywood producer, is such an inspiration to me. She decided to achieve big things for herself despite family expectations, and I've always looked up to her and thought, "That is the kind of woman I want to be."

SK: Do you have any career advice for women either looking to get into farming or in the beginning phases of it?

GD: My advice would be if you love what you do, then there is no challenge you won't be able to overcome. The country needs young, hardworking female farmers to evolve and modernize the agriculture industry so it can meet the challenges of tomorrow.

SK: What was the best career advice you've received?

GD: Don't make decisions based solely on money. You should decide your next move based on if it is in line with your values and where you want to progress in your career, not how much money you will make.

In addition to supporting female farmers, De Laurentiis has been busy promoting her new cookbook, Giada's Italy, which was released on April 3. "It's all about entertaining the Italian way and gets back to the basics of Italian culture. All recipes are inspired by Rome, and my family and I recently spent time shooting photos and meals in Italy and had such a blast!" she says.

For more information about Fund Her Farm, you can visit Simply 7's website; and for more information about De Laurentiis' new cookbook, visit her website here.

Richard Gere May Have Gotten Married & Hidden It From All of Us

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When celebrities get married, things can be a circus — police barricades, security checking guest’s invitations, paparazzi in helicopters — so you can’t blame someone for wanting to keep things on the down low. And that’s what Richard Gere reportedly managed to do as he wed his girlfriend Alejandra Silva earlier this month (emphasis on reportedly because Gere has yet to confirm any of this) in what was reported as a secret civil ceremony by Spanish magazine Hola! No reports on where the alleged ceremony took place, but a source told the publication the couple will celebrate with their families in New York on May 6 – if any nuptials actually took place.

More: Cindy Crawford Spills Richard Gere Divorce Deets

Silva and Gere have known each other a long time. According to People, Gere had been a family friend for many years, and when they saw each other again in 2014, they immediately bonded. “I’m not ignoring our [33-year] age difference and what it means to be with a Hollywood star, but when there’s such a strong karmic energy, the problems disappear,” Silva said.

Alejandra Silva Insta

Alejandra Silva Insta

Her father is a businessperson who also served as vice president of Spanish soccer team Real Madrid. Silva herself runs the Rais Foundation, a Spanish nonprofit that combats homelessness. Despite her charity work, Silva said she felt a little unmoored when she met Gere and he has helped ground her. “I was a little lost, without light and knowing him gave meaning to my life,” she told Hola!

The couple has dated for four years and didn’t seem to be in any hurry to rush into marriage, perhaps because both have been through the experience before. Gere was married to model Cindy Crawford from 1991 – '95, and actor Carey Lowell from 2002 – '13. According to Us Weekly. Silva was married to businessperson Govind Friedland from 2012 – '15. They each have one son.

Celebrities have gotten pretty good at hiding nuptials from the public eye. Recently, actors Amanda Seyfried and Thomas Sadoski kept their wedding a secret until he made the announcement on The Late Late Show with James Corden. And perhaps one of the biggest low-profile weddings was Justin Theroux and Jennifer Aniston's in 2015, which still had helicopters full of paparazzi capturing every detail of the quiet affair at their home.

MoreRichard Gere & Carey Lowell Are Calling It Quits

As for Gere and Silva, we wish them all the happiness in the world as they start this new journey together. Their wedding may have been a secret, but we sincerely hope they'll start letting us into their precious relationship more in the near future, because they're a precious couple.

The Obamas Congratulate Prince William & Kate Middleton on the Newest Royal

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The littlest royal arrived this week, and stateside, our very own "king and queen," Barack and Michelle Obama warmly congratulated Prince William and the Duchess of Cambridge, commonly known as Kate Middleton on the arrival of their third child with a solid inside joke.

Obamas

Obamas

The former first lady tweeted, "Barack and I are thrilled to congratulate The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge on their newest arrival!” along with a photo of herself and Barack Obama in April 2016 meeting Prince George for the first time. “We hope to meet [the new prince] soon for a Kensington Palace pajama party. I’ll wear my robe!”

More: The Obamas Came for Dinner, but Prince George DGAF

Michelle was referring, of course, to Prince George's adorable fluffy bedtime ensemble during their first meeting — the outfit that melted the hearts of royal watchers around the world.

obama and george

obama and george

Photos from that 2016 visit also show Prince George enjoying the rocking horse given to him by the Obamas. When George was born, the Obamas sent the young prince a hand-carved rocking horse emblazoned with the presidential seal. They also sent him a polo mallet crafted from an oak tree on the South Lawn of the White House. Not too shabby, eh?

rocking horse

rocking horse

Apparently, baby Princess Charlotte was asleep when the Obamas visited last time, and thus missed all the PJ-party fun. But the Obamas left her a puzzle as well as a snuggly stuffed toy version of their famous Portuguese water dog, Bo. They also gave the tiny princess an Amish rocking chair and personalized baby blanket when she was born.

More: The Obamas' New Portraits Are Simply Stunning

We're hoping there will soon be a photo opportunity with the Obamas, William and Kate and all three of the Duke and Duchess' children. Matching royal robes for all, please!

The Bachelor Producers Are Making a New Dating Show & Honestly, It Sounds Terrible

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The producers of ABC’s Bachelor franchise are at it again, this time launching a new dating series called The Proposal. According to The Hollywood Reporter, this 10-episode summer series will pit 10 contestants against each other in a series of four pageant-style rounds as they compete for — wait for the shocking twist — a mystery suitor! The final two contestants will then meet the eligible bachelor or bachelorette, and a proposal may or may not be made at that time.

MoreThe Biggest Problem of The Bachelor Finale Had Nothing to Do With Arie

THR also reported that The Proposal will be hosted by current Good Morning America cohost Jesse Palmer, who got to romance 30 lovely ladies in The Bachelor Season 5 in 2004. He and his chosen love interest at the time, Jessica Bowlin, ended the show as a couple, but the two didn't get engaged. All this is to say that Palmer knows a thing or two about how things go down in Bachelor Nation and he knows how to play host, so he'll be perfect for this gig.

Here's how ABC described the rounds to THR (and we're already cringing a little): Each episode "will follow the male or female daters as they attempt to woo the mystery suitor with their words in a first impressions round; bare their souls in a beachwear round; answer the mystery suitor’s most pressing romantic questions; and strive to receive a seal of approval from the mystery suitor’s most trusted family member in the final round." There's no mention yet of whether roses will be involved, but heck, they might as well throw some in there for good measure.

Can we be the first to go on record as saying this show sounds like a terrible idea? Seriously, we know dating is incredibly hard in this day and age, but at least you get to see the person you’re considering a date with before you have to put on a show for them. It’s just painful to think about how many more headlines we’re going to see about people making fools of themselves in pursuit of love on this show or, as is typically the case, announcing that they're breaking up after putting themselves out there for a virtual stranger on camera.

More: The Bachelor Keeps Getting More Extreme in Its Dating Tactics

It's hard not to wonder whether the Bachelor franchise's producers are still convinced that this formula will work even though it's proven to be problematic. The franchise leaned hard into the schmaltz for The Bachelor: Winter Games. It was divisive in the worst way when producers exploited Becca Kufrin being dumped by Arie Luyendyk Jr. on television for the most recent Bachelor season finale. There were huge questions about the franchise's credibility when allegations that DeMario Jackson had sexually assaulted Corinne Olympios while filming Bachelor in Paradise were seemingly swept under the rug. Are producers really still convinced romance can be found on reality TV? Ratings for both the flagship shows have been falling, according to Buzzfeed, so they could be aiming to air the next big, splashy hit show that can reel viewers back in with as much bombast and drama as possible.

MoreThe Bachelor's Most Popular Bachelors

Whatever the motivation for The Proposal, it will be difficult to watch a show that puts people on display like a meat market for the purposes of finding true love. At least on the other shows, the participants have some agency in forming a relationship with their love interest. We’ll just have to wait and see if America will tune in for 10 weeks. Right now, we're not that optimistic.

Gabrielle Union Reveals the Hidden Message in Bring It On

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Cultural appropriation” is a phrase that’s become ubiquitous in discussions of current fashion and beauty trends (if this is foreign territory for you, take a quick gander on Google). Although the term wasn’t as popular in the early aughts as it is in 2018, the concept still made its way into mainstream media back then in the hit blockbuster, Bring It On.

That’s right – the, “Hey Mickey, you’re so fine” flick that might have been sold as a girly cheerleading movie was actually a commentary on white people taking black culture. It’s a pretty clear-cut theme of the film, since a group of white cheerleaders literally steal routines from an all-black squad in another town, but the seriousness of the issue was easy to overlook because of the movie’s sugary, rom-com packaging.

Gabrielle Union Cultural Appropriation 1

Gabrielle Union Cultural Appropriation 1

More: Miley Cyrus Accused of Cultural Appropriation

But the idea of cultural appropriation was something Gabrielle Union – who, at age 26, co-starred with Kirsten Dunst as the rival captain of the East Compton Clovers – was certainly focused on after she was denied a role in a different all-white movie. The 45-year-old actress recently spoke to ELLE about what Bring It On meant to her.

“I had wanted this cheerleading movie Sugar & Spice, but they didn’t go black on any of the roles. I couldn’t even audition. In Bring It On, the story is about cultural appropriation, and how the hard work of African Americans has been repackaged with blond hair and blue eyes. The social justice of it appealed to me.”

Gabrielle Union Eva Longoria IG post 2

Gabrielle Union Eva Longoria IG post 2

More: Tyra Banks Was Fired from Victoria’s Secret Because of Her Hair

Union obviously is, and always has been, a champion of women of color. Aside from making giant strides in TV by producing BET’s female-centric drama, Being Mary Jane, Union has an entire #WCW series on Instagram that highlights powerful women of color who she admires.

Since Bring It On was Union’s big break, we applaud her for being so mindful about the kind of narratives she took (and still takes) part in. We always love seeing women championing other women, and that includes women of color telling their stories and supporting each other. You keep doing you, Union.

Originally posted on StyleCaster.


Drew Barrymore Is Being Glam-Shamed By Fans But Why?

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Welcome to another day of body and beauty-shaming (collective eye-roll). In the last week, we’ve seen people stereotype Bella Thorne as a “partier” because of her acne; others deem Ashley Graham not a “real model” because of her size; and today, we have an equally infuriating situation: people are judging Drew Barrymore not for how she looks without makeup – but rather, how she looks when she wears what some claim is too much makeup.

On Friday, Barrymore posted a photo to Instagram promoting her makeup line Flower Beauty, in which she flaunted a metallic raspberry pout and smoky green eye makeup.

Drew Barrymore Makeup shammed 1

Drew Barrymore Makeup shammed 1

More: Kim Kardashian Body-Shamed for ‘Gangrene’ Toes

Of course, not all of the 43-year-old “Santa Clarita Diet” actor’s followers were fans of the look – and they just couldn’t keep their opinions to themselves.

“uhm…. too much makeup…. way too much. U look so much better and younger without”

“Not your best look but just my two cents.”

“You are a natural beauty and don’t need all of this.. ages you”

“that makeup is no good for over 40s you look 10 years older.”

More: What Celebrities Look Like With and Without Makeup

We’ve been over this. We’ll say it again (and again, and again). It’s pretty much impossible for women to win in our current look-flawless-but-not-like-you-tried, wear-makeup-but-not-too-much Goldilocks culture. A woman paints her face in gorgeous fashion, like Barrymore? Fake! Too much! Unflattering! She wears zero makeup, showing that she’s actually a real person? People rarely want to see that either.

Another majorly problematic and obnoxious part of this whole situation is the criticism that the makeup looks Barrymore look older. Perhaps she’s not trying to look younger—did that occur to anyone? That aging naturally and letting your real skin and features show is actually perfectly natural, normal, OK, and beautiful?

We call bullshit on these thoughtless, judgey commenters. Luckily, plenty of fans also posted with supportive, loving messages to balance out the negativity. Still, on the subject of age, what’s really getting old is seeing unattainable beauty standards churned out and reinforced again and again—by real people hiding behind their Instagram handles, no less.

Originally posted on StyleCaster.

Paris Jackson Slams Family Members Who Are Spreading Fake News

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Paris Jackson is once again at odds with her family and she's setting the record straight in a very public, very defiant way. While it's not clear if the family members she's calling out are just on her father's side of the family or, more specifically, what the family members in question have been saying about her, but there do not seem to be too many warm feelings going around between Jackson and her the folks she's related to.

MoreThe Internet Is Crying Over Paris Jackson's New Photoshopped Picture (& So Are We)

According to E! News, Jackson jumped onto her Instagram Stories and shot back directly to her family in reaction to an article on Page Six which profiled how the family fears for her life. In the now-deleted series of posts, Jackson was reportedly seen driving in a car with a friend. She addressed the alleged concerns right away: "So apparently people think I’m about to die. My therapist texted me about it laughing though, so that’s good,” she stated, continuing, "so I guess to the family members that are talking to all of these news outlets saying they’re worried for me: When the last time you called me? (Her brother) Prince isn’t worried. Why? Because we talk all the time. We hang out. If you’re worried about me, call me."

That seems pretty straightforward and clear, but coming from a woman who has always been honest about her health concerns and well-being in the past (as was the case with her very candid 2017 Rolling Stone interview) it seems fairly par for the course.

More: Paris Jackson Wrote an Ode to Her Childhood & Shared a Homemade Video

While her mental health history may be some of the concern what’s worrying the family now is her more recent actions. In March, she posted a now-removed Instagram video, showing her walking on the ledge of a building with traffic visible many stories below. She almost loses her balance then falls back into the arms of close friend (and rumored girlfriend), model and actor Cara Delevigne. In the same Page Six report that features worried comments from her family, one relative likened this skyscraper video to the time Michael Jackson held his son Blanket over a hotel balcony to show him to a crowd, hence why everyone is concerned: "This is worse than that because I still think Michael had control of Blanket and they weren’t early as high up as Paris is in this video. She’s lost it. She really has."

More: Listening to Paris Jackson Sing Is Like Listening to Michael Jackson

Ultimately, though, the relative told Page Six that all they really want is to know that Jackson is healthy and happy, and that’s what her father would have wanted too. “Michael would have wanted her to be happy. If Cara or whoever it might be makes her happy and complete, at the end of the day, that’s what it’s all about.”

The Best Sex Positions That Double as a Workout

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Let’s face it. Life is hectic. What with work, socializing, finding a new spring look and keeping up with the Kardashians, it can be hard to fit in time for sex and a good workout, let alone both. According to science (specifically the researchers at Université du Québec à Montréal), sexual activity can burn an average of 75 to 100 calories per session depending on your body, which is roughly equivalent to a light walk. If you’re looking to push yourself to the next level of sexercise, we’ve got you covered. These four positions will get you (and your partner) off while working you both out. What a sweet deal!

Swiss ball blitz

Work your core with this sexy balancing act. Alicia Sinclair, a certified sex educator and founder of b-Vibe, Le Wand and The Cowgirl, tells SheKnows that she recommends this position for those who enjoy “deep penetration and emphasis on the G-spot,” though this would also work with anal penetration.

For this position, have the penetrator (this can be done with a penis, fingers or a dildo) on the bottom and carefully have the penetratee climb on top. Working together, find a rhythm that both keeps you balanced and feels great. In no time at all you’ll have rock-hard abs and deep, satisfying orgasms.

More: Don't Love Being on Top? These Tips Will Change Your Mind

The glute-gasm

This position, brought to us by Lovability’s CEO and founder, Tiffany Gaines, is ideal for couples in which one person has a penis (or a dildo). Here's how to do it: “Have the person with the penis sit on a couch or a bed comfortably with their back supported. Then, the other person climbs on top of them in a straddling position supported by their knees. Once your vagina or anus is positioned directly above the penis [or dildo], get ready to squat!," Gaines tells SheKnows.

For partners with penises, this up-and-down motion will provide some great stimulation. "While in the low, bent-knee squat position, you'll feel an intense penetration and an opportunity to experience an internal orgasm," she adds. "If you also have a clitoris, have your partner rub it gently while you're squatting."

A double orgasm and great booty workout all in one? Sign us up!

Against the wall

We’ve all seen it in the movies, but according to Sinclair, getting frisky against a wall is a whole lot harder than it looks. This position will work arms and legs for the base and abs for the person on top and can be done with either person against the wall.

MoreWhy the Pleasure Gap Is a Gender-Equality Issue

It’ll be easier if the person on top is against the wall (to support some of their weight), but if you’d like that extra ab workout, put the base against the wall with your partner’s legs wrapped around your torso. You can even throw a few crunches in before you get started. Tip: If going the penetrative route, it can be easier to find the position if you practice on a bed first.

Resist & restrain

This great muscle-builder, recommended by Zoe Whitney of SSASE, an educational and social group for submissive women, is perfect for those who enjoy dominant-submissive play. Replace your under-the-bed restraints and/or handcuffs with exercise resistance bands. As you play, you’ll be working your biceps, forearms, quads and calves every time you move. As an extra bonus, resistance bands come in various levels of resistance, from very stretchy to very sturdy — a range that is perfect for punishment and control.

Go forth, you sexy minxes, and get your sexercise on! May your sexy times always be an amazing workout for your body and your mind.

Amazon Will Now Deliver Packages to Your Car in 37 Cities

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Sometimes, the modern world starts looking more and more like a sci-fi story. How many of us now have one or more devices in our homes that are listening at all times (hello, Alexa, Siri and Google)? Well, now, Amazon is taking things one step further with their most recent announcement.

Last year, Amazon announced their new in-home delivery service, but now, Amazon is also happy to drop off packages in the trunk of your car.

More: The Amazon Prime Perks You're Not Taking Advantage Of

The new service, an extension of the Amazon Key product, is being launched in partnership with General Motors and Volvo and is rolling out in 37 U.S. cities today. You will need to own a Chevrolet, Buick, GMC, Cadillac or Volvo model year 2015 or newer with active OnStar or Volvo on Call accounts to take advantage of this new service.

More: 10 Companies Where Everyone Works From Home

Peter Larsen, the vice president of delivery technology at Amazon, told The Verge that Amazon had been pleased with the response to in-home delivery. “What we wanted to do — and it was part of the plan all along — is how we take that beyond the home,” he said.

More: My Phone Ruined My Relationship

Amazon released a video with the first customers of the service sharing their thoughts. One woman had her daughter’s birthday gifts delivered to the car, saying she liked that the packages wouldn’t get stolen from her doorstep. Another woman said it was convenient because the doorbell wouldn’t wake up her napping children.

Amazon car

Amazon car

Whether you’re happy about the future of technology and the convenience it provides, or, like me, it was a little creepy to be watching the promo video only to have your Echo start chiming in, it seems like the service is a hit. The rest of us future-fearing sticks-in-the-mud will probably just have to get used to it.

Matt Lauer Is 'Embarrassed & Ashamed' at How Different His Life Is Now

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It’s tough to feel sympathy for any of the men caught up in the #MeToo scandals, but sympathy seems to be what Matt Lauer is hoping he can garner. He’s recently been spotted out looking pretty far removed from his days as the bouncy anchor of the Today show. Sources reported to Entertainment Tonight that Lauer is struggling to get his life back together as his divorce from second wife Annette Roque looms. He was fired from Today just one day after allegations of inappropriate sexual behavior in the workplace were filed, and now Roque, with whom Lauer shares three children, petitioned for divorce after 19 years of marriage.

More: Matt Lauer Didn't Spend His Holiday Weekend Alone

“Annette’s friends don’t feel [the split] was overnight," a source told ET. "It has been building for years... Annette is angry. She feels Matt’s behavior has affected a lot of people and has embarrassed the whole family.”

But Lauer's wife isn't the only one feeling the embarrassment. Apparently, Lauer has cut himself off from his life in Manhattan and “looks exhausted," the source claimed. "Matt is finally coming to terms with the reality that his marriage is over and he is in bad shape. He feels he lost everything important in his life overnight. He is embarrassed and ashamed.”

It’s still hard to feel bad for Lauer since he’s lying in a bed he made for himself (and that bed also happens to be in the Hamptons). But a source said that Lauer’s days “are lonely now.”

More: Matt Lauer's Wife, Annette Roque, Has Reportedly Kicked Him Out

So, Lauer isn't feeling great about life, but is he regretting his actions or is he just mourning lost opportunities post-scandal? Another source insinuated that Lauer is simply waiting for the right time to return to the limelight.

“Matt feels terrible and regrets his behavior, but his regret isn’t enough right now. It feels like all doors have closed for him,” the source told ET. “Matt seems to be under the impression that if he waits this news cycle out, this will go away and he can have a comeback. He has seen a lot of people come back and hopes he will too. For right now, his friends feel that isn't realistic. His team has discussed a public apology but agreed disappearing right now seems to be for the best.”

More: Ann Curry Actually Isn't Celebrating Matt Lauer's Termination

Twitter isn't having anything to do with remorse, though, and reactions to news about Lauer has been swift and fierce:

Matt Lauer Tweet

Matt Lauer Tweet

Matt Lauer Tweet 2

Matt Lauer Tweet 2

Society still hasn’t come to any consensus about possible second chances for the men caught in these scandals; perhaps that'll never happen. In which case Lauer will just have to find a way to come to terms with this new kind of normal.

Nick Viall Nabbed This General Hospital Role

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Step aside, Mario Lopez, there’s a new host in town. Fans of General Hospital are gearing up for the Nurses Ball, the show’s annual showcase of glitz and glamour, and according to TV Insider, ABC has tapped The Bachelor's Nick Viall to host this year's event. Viall will reportedly handle the red carpet interviews and step inside to watch some of the live performances.

More: Why Are They Casting Women So Much Younger Than Nick Viall on The Bachelor?

While Viall got his start in reality TV, he's branched out a lot since handing his final rose to Vanessa Grimaldi (they've since broken up; he supposedly rebounded with January Jones). After Viall competed (and lost) on Dancing With the Stars, he decided to throw his reality TV career to the wayside for a future in scripted TV. "I have zero plans to do reality TV," he told Entertainment Tonight. "I'm certainly done with anything Bachelor-related, but I'm very thankful for my time."

According to ET, Viall enrolled in acting lessons and they paid off quickly. In the last year, he guest starred on an episode of Speechless and had a small role on the TV movie A Christmas Cruise, where he played a hotel manager and shared a few scenes with Vivica A. Fox and Kristoff St. John. Not bad, huh?

But now it seems Viall is transitioning to on-camera host, and this could be his most dramatic career change yet. Chris Harrison had better watch out!

The Nurses Ball got its start back in 1994 when Lucy Coe, played by Lynn Herring, suggested it as a fundraiser for HIV/AIDS research. It became an annual event until the soap discontinued it in 2001. General Hospital picked it up again in 2013, and the Nurses Ball has become part of the regular summer programming for the characters of Port Charles. Last year, Lopez stood in as the red carpet host.

More: Wait — Could Nick Viall Actually Be the Bachelor Again?

Production started on the Nurses Ball episodes today, and the gala will air over four episodes during the week of May 16.

Foolproof Ways to Keep Your Succulents Alive & Thriving

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ICYMI, succulents are enjoying a major moment right now. If you spend any amount of time on Instagram and Pinterest — and, honestly, who doesn’t? — you’ve likely swooned over all the beautifully appointed spaces dotted with these trendy plants.

It’s only natural that you might be thinking about potting a few to prettify your own pad. However, like all plants, succulents have specific care requirements. Diving into the endeavor without learning these requirements (or knowing them and ignoring them) means a succulent graveyard could be in your near future.

More: 9 Renter-Friendly Ways to Revamp Your Space Without Paint or Construction

Now that you’re sufficiently freaked out, though, take a breath. Not only can you keep succulents in your home, but you should. Those care requirements are actually a lot easier to manage than the requirements for many plants. Succulents are popular for many reasons, and the main two are how easy and beautiful they are.

But before we sent you into the world of succulent ownership half-cocked, we thought it might be best to ask an expert for foolproof tips on not killing your new plant friends. As president of FormLA Landscaping, a high-end, optimally sustainable firm based in Los Angeles, Cassy Aoyagi knows a thing or two about keeping succulents alive and thriving. Here’s her take.

More: 6 Designs Proving Mud Cloth Is the New Boho Accent

Pick authentic or native succulents

Not every succulent will be suitable for every climate. Some don’t do well indoors at all. Pick a variety of succulents that can be found in nature as close as possible to your geographic area. If there are no succulents occurring naturally nearby, choose those that come from a similar climate. For example, says Aoyagi, “California native Coast Dudleya thrives in [LA’s] hot, dry summers and cold, wet winters, whereas South American echeveria wants warm rain and a cold dry season and Arizona native succulents want more dry heat than LA’s coastal cities offer.”

Protect succulents from abundant rain (and don’t over-water them)

While it may seem logical to keep your succulents on your outdoor patio — plants like the great outdoors, right? — it can be the kiss of death for succulents if you aren’t careful. “Desert succulents like agave and aloe need protection from Mediterranean climates,” Aoyagi tells SheKnows. “If they are in a planted space, have them on a separate, lower water irrigation hydro-zone to avoid root-rot. Cover them on cool nights and in rain to avoid burns on their broad leaves.”

More: 22 Ways to Add a Pop of Spring to Your Home

Because succulents store water in their fleshy leaves, they don’t like to be watered as often as other indoor plants... but they do like to be watered, nevertheless. The key to making indoor succulents happy is to soak the roots (albeit less frequently than other indoor plants) and let the soil dry between watering. Once the soil has been dry a few days, then you can water again.

Contain them

Aoyagi says that the best place for nonnative succulents is in a container garden that you can easily move or adjust to protect and care for your plants. The good news is that succulents respond well to the humidity and warmth in most homes and, although they like light, they can adapt to lower-light environments. So, hey, you’re already off to a good start. Follow Aoyagi’s tips and you’ll have a succulent-specific green thumb in no time.


Miranda Lambert May Already Be Rebounding With Another Musician

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It's been a hot minute since Miranda Lambert broke up with her boyfriend of two years, musician Anderson East, and there is already speculation she might be seeing someone new.

More: Miranda Lambert Is Broken-Hearted, & She's Not Afraid to Admit It

A source who's reportedly close to Lambert revealed to Us Weekly that her alleged new beau is musician Evan Felker, the frontman of rising country music group Turnpike Troubadours. "They are very much involved," the source claims.

Yet another source dished to Us Weekly that these two have "started spending a lot more time together while on the road" (Turnpike Troubadours is the opening act on Lambert's Livin' Like Hippies tour), but there's no information from a verifiable source about how these two have been spending their time together or if — keyword here — they've been spending more time together.

Neither Lambert nor Felker has confirmed they're anything more than tour buddies. Even though Lambert started dating East mere months after divorcing Blake Shelton in 2015, that's not exactly incontrovertible proof she moved on as quickly a second time.

Lambert's Instagram account is notably devoid of any indications she's seeing someone new, much like the Turnpike Troubadours' Instagram account is devoid of any information that would connect Felker to Lambert. (Felker doesn't appear to have a personal Instagram.)

More: Miranda Lambert & Anderson East Break Up, for Real This Time (Maybe)

But until Lambert or Felker confirm their relationship, we should take this with a grain of salt.

What I Wish I’d Known Before Going Through Infertility

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If I had my own DeLorean, I would travel back six years and tell my 35-year-old self that the road’s about to get bumpy, and here’s what you need to know to navigate it. After all, most people don’t know a lot about infertility until they’re already in the thick of it, and then it’s like a desperate dash to try to understand (and overcome) unexpected fertility challenges.

That was definitely the case for me: My diagnosis of diminished ovarian reserve at age 36 completely blindsided me, and it took three years, two IUIs, three IVF cycles, two miscarriages and a whole lot of resources and support to reach the other side. So, if I can use what I learned along the way to help others point their GPS in the right direction, I’m all for it — because when it comes to infertility, ignorance isn’t bliss. Below, five lessons I’ve learned, thanks to 20/20 hindsight.

There are no guarantees

Before I struggled with infertility, I (mistakenly) thought that doing IVF was the fast track to getting pregnant. After all, if you’re spending thousands of dollars and shooting yourself up with hormones, it must be a sure thing, right? What I didn’t know was that less than half of all IVF cycles (excluding donor egg cycles) result in a live birth — and as you get older, that percentage gets drastically lower (down to 15.7 percent for 41- and 42-year-old women).

More: Popular IVF Myths: Separating Fact From Fiction

Cue my utter devastation when my first IVF cycle didn’t work. My husband and I had done a few unsuccessful IUI cycles when we got the opportunity to join a clinical trial and decided to take the plunge into IVF with relatively little preparation. I jumped at the chance to get a “low-cost” cycle for $3,500, thinking it would be a surefire solution to our fertility issues. What I didn’t know was that the protocol was completely wrong for me and that the medication would completely suppress my ovaries, resulting in a Big Fat Negative.

On that note...

Not every protocol or supplement is right for everyone

It’s easy to get caught up in comparing notes with others going through infertility. Everyone’s eager to help each other, and support groups are full of women sharing tips on supplements, medications and other approaches that worked. But infertility is highly individual, and what helps one person may hamper someone else’s efforts.

For instance, I see people recommending DHEA to others a lot, and I can see why, as someone who is “adrenally challenged.” This supplement helped me restore egg quality and achieve healthier levels of testosterone. But it’s not a one-size-fits-all elixir. Dr. Geoffrey Sher of Sher Fertility believes that the supplement can fuel a “testosterone overload” that could be detrimental to older women and those with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome).

Translation: It’s best to do your own research and work with a professional to design a customized regimen and treatment protocol. Even then, it’s not always evident right away, as it can often take two or more fertility treatments to discover what works best for your body (as I learned the hard way). I also recommend the book It Starts With the Egg, which does a great job of breaking down various diagnoses and suggesting supplements for each.

So. Many. Appointments

Ultrasounds and blood tests and consultations, oh my! The process of doing fertility treatments can take over your life — and your schedule definitely pays the price. During treatment cycles, monitoring appointments are often every other day (not counting trips to the pharmacy and other related things like acupuncture). Then there’s the retrieval surgery and/or embryo transfer, which can require taking multiple days off work. As one person in my support group put it, “It’s like a second job.”

As a freelance writer, I’m lucky enough to be able to work from home, so it wasn’t a huge deal for me to bring my laptop to the doctor’s office and sit in the waiting room (sometimes for as long as three hours!). But for teachers and others with inflexible schedules, I can’t imagine what it would be like to try to make it all work — not to mention the nosy or insensitive questions that might arise from coworkers and superiors.

Prepare to enter an indefinite state of limbo

Going through infertility is like one big “in-between” phase. You’re still in childfree mode, but you're also hoping that will change sooner than later and doing whatever it takes to get from Point A to Point B. In the meantime, it’s difficult to make travel plans (both personal and professional)... or any plans, really. Planning ahead becomes a game of “If I’m pregnant, then [X], but if I’m not pregnant, then [Y].” 

More: Knowing When to Draw the Line on Fertility Treatment

There are also those empty spaces between fertility treatments, where you’re feverishly planning for the next one and making lots of lifestyle changes to boost your chances. (Or maybe you’re just trying to save up enough money to even afford another treatment.)

The feeling of limbo can also extend to watching friends and family members move forward with their lives and successfully conceive babies while you’re unsure if you’ll ever reach that stage. It’s unsettling to live in perpetual limbo, but talking to a therapist, friend or partner can help.

Infertility will always be a part of you

When you’re in the thick of it, it’s easy to dream about leaving those difficult days behind and moving on for good once you have a family. That’s not as easy as it sounds.

RESOLVE, the National Infertility Association, refers to infertility survivors as having “resolved” their infertility. As someone who fits into that category, however, I can definitively say that my struggle with infertility continues to color my actions and thoughts every single day. Whether it’s relishing the feeling of hugging my 2-year-old twins, having irrational fears about their safety, trying to lose the weight I gained over three IVF cycles and my pregnancy, or recognizing lingering depression and self-worth issues stemming from that time of my life, it’s all still there — and I’m OK with that.

While I’ve left it behind, I never want to forget, and now that I know the outcome, I would happily take that DeLorean to do it all over again — but with the knowledge and experience from a few hard-earned lessons leading the way.

Julie Bowen's Parenting Style Is Very Different From Her TV Alter Ego's

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The Mother Lode

Julie Bowen may play a totally Type-A mom of three on Modern Family, but, when we caught up with the actor just ahead of Mother’s Day, it became clear almost instantly that this real-life mom of three doesn't share her character’s trademark neurotic nature. Bowen's a cool mom whose idea of perfection is way more chill, and it involves playing four-square in the backyard with sons Oliver, John and Gustav.

“I used to always plan activities, and they’re never as fun as what happens instead of the activity or before the activity or when the activity falls apart,” she shared with SheKnows. “That has taught me so much about just being in the moment with them. It doesn’t have to be this picture-perfect day.”

More: Julie Bowen Is Sick of Those Sofia Vergara Feud Rumors

Adopting this relaxed approach to motherhood is precisely what led Bowen to discover her kids’ love of four-square. Hot on the heels of a flopped plan to squeeze in quality time at the local park, the actor taught her kids the backyard sport on a whim. Much to her surprise, they instantly declared it the best game ever. That’s the trick, says Bowen: “It’s just sort of being there and getting the good moments when they come along because they are usually by accident. Very rarely are they planned.”

Julie Bowen With Kids Insta #1

Julie Bowen With Kids Insta #1

But Bowen points out that parenting — like most things in life — requires balance. We live in a lightning rod of a time when it comes to socio-political conversations, especially where men are concerned. For all her spontaneity, the star admits that a lot of thought goes into how she approaches raising her three sons to be good stewards of humanity.

More: Modern Family's Nolan Gould Says Julie Bowen Is "Crazy"

“They know that I’m a very strong and independent person, and I hope that I’m raising them with enough respect. Their dad’s a super-kind guy, so I hope we’re baking it in and it doesn’t have to be a sea change where one day we’re like, ‘Hey, guys, turns out being racist is bad, and you’re not supposed to rape either!’ Like, I hope we only have to do minimal course corrections,” Bowen said, laughing.

The bottom line for Bowen is treating motherhood (and her kids) with honesty. For example, her kids get the blunt truth from her, no matter what. “If they ask a question, I’ll answer it. I don’t offer other information that they’re not looking for, but they know how babies are made, where they come from, what sexual violence is and how people are supposed to behave and not behave,” she revealed, adding, “It was never, ‘We’re gonna sit down and have this conversation’ — as soon as I felt they were old enough, I included these conversations in everything. You know, watching a movie and you go, ‘I don’t like the way they’re treating that lady; what do you think?’”

Julie Bowen With Kids Insta #2

Julie Bowen With Kids Insta #2

Bowen gives her own mother, Suzanne Frey, much credit for helping shape her into the mom she’s turned out to be. She also can’t help but marvel at how truly committed Frey was to being a great parent. A stay-at-home mother during the '70s in conservative Baltimore, Frey (despite not being a natural cook) made sure her kids had three home-cooked meals a day on the table — often vegetables she grew in her own garden. “It was just all on her, and that was a full-time job. I’m not saying it’s any easier to be a parent now, but there are a lot more conveniences. I definitely hit InstaCart yesterday, you know? Because I didn’t have time to pick up the kids in all different places and go to the grocery store. She didn’t have those options. It was her whole job all the time,” Bowen said.

Julie Bowen's Mom Insta #3

Julie Bowen's Mom Insta #3

More: Modern Family's Julie Bowen Scores Perfect Role on The Mindy Project

The Modern Family star will get the chance to express some of that gratitude this Mother’s Day in a big way. She is partnering with Hallmark and Improv Everywhere for a special project inspired by mothers everywhere. As families walk through a park, they’ll come across a huge, 12-foot-tall Mother’s Day card that appears to be a public art installation. As the mothers approach and read the giant inscription on the card, it will slowly dawn on them that the message inside is for them.

Making the project even more poignant for Bowen is the fact her own mom will be among those surprised. “The note I wrote I did with my kids, because I thought it would be cuter if it was in their old scrabbled-up handwriting,” she told us of the sweet surprise. But what would Bowen’s message to her own mother be?

She confessed, “If I was writing it for her and no one else was going to see it, I would just say, ‘I learned all the important stuff from you.’” 

I Put My Future Kids on Ice — & It's the Best Decision I've Ever Made

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This was never the plan. Then again, I suppose it rarely is.

Freezing my eggs isn’t something I’d ever considered more than fleetingly — that is, until recently. Perhaps because it’s still a relatively uncommon and unfamiliar (not to mention expensive) procedure. Perhaps because I’d heard that it’s ineffective, which turns out to be an incomplete story at best and a flagrant lie at worst. Perhaps because I wanted to believe I still had plenty of time.

As a child  —  hell, even throughout most of my twenties  —  I couldn’t imagine getting to age 33 and not having a baby, let alone not having a partner.

On some level, I’ve always been a mom at heart. I babysat since the age of 10; I half-raised my little sister. I’m drawn to the babies of friends and strangers in a manner that could only be described as “moth-like.” I’ve been taken aback by my own mama-bear tendencies when it comes to the people I manage at work (who, for the record, are all very much adults).

But what I’ve ended up with instead of the 2.5 kids I imagined is an amazing career that feels like it’s finally taking off, an apartment that’s teensy but mine in the greatest city in the world, friends I love like family and a cat I love like a piece of my soul. And I wouldn’t trade it for second.

But biology hasn’t kept pace with women’s lib. And so in February, just after my 33rd birthday, I opted to spend approximately $15,000 and two weeks of discomfort in an attempt to buy myself some time.

More:  Is There Really a "Right Time" to Have Kids?

Not everyone realizes how fleeting female fertility is. The female body releases one egg each month until menopause, around age 50. But the quality of those eggs begins to decline long before, leading to increased difficulty getting and staying pregnant, as well as higher rates of (sometimes fatal) chromosomal abnormalities. The sharpest drop-off in quality begins around age 35. (Men, meanwhile, seem to have all the time in the world. Why would we expect anything different?)

People who are struggling to conceive will often turn to in-vitro fertilization (IVF), in which hormone injections are administered for a week and a half, give or take, to stimulate the ovaries to release many eggs at once. Then the eggs are retrieved, which involves a low dose of general anesthesia called twilight sedation, and the whole thing — sedation, retrieval, waking up — takes about 20 minutes.

If they can’t retrieve enough eggs, it may be necessary to do another cycle. Another round of twice-daily injections. Another $15,000.

Freezing your eggs works exactly the same way. The only difference is that instead of immediately fertilizing one of the eggs in a petri dish and then re-introducing it into the uterus, all the eggs are put on ice until you’re ready to use them. They can remain that way indefinitely without risk to their viability.

Which means that, even if I don’t get around to having kids until my 40s, my eggs will be 33. And the age of the egg is what matters.

I may not need to use them. Plenty of people get pregnant the old-fashioned way, even later in life. But this way, I’ll have them. It’s essentially an insurance policy.

The hormone injections began with the start of my period. Every two days, I got up at 7:30 for bloodwork and an ultrasound. It has to be that early, so they can get the lab results back in time to tell you what dosage of hormones to inject yourself with that night. And the next morning. And the next night. Etc.

I kept showing up for appointments half expecting them to tell me, “Huh, nothing’s happening.” It didn’t feel like something I could possibly be making happen on my own, especially when the outcome rested so heavily on overcoming my needle phobia.

More: PSA: Women Don't Need a Reason Not to Have Kids

But in fact, the egg babies were bigger — aka more mature — each time. And after just nine days, it was time to give myself the “trigger shot” that would prepare them for retrieval.

I crossed my fingers we’d be able to freeze enough of them not to have to do it again. I knew my personal best-case outcome was around 12 eggs, which is on the lower end. But being under 35 gave me better odds of more eggs being mature enough to be frozen — and better odds that more of those frozen eggs would healthy enough to survive the eventual thaw.

The retrieval itself turned out to be the easiest part. They got me settled on the table and put in the IV, telling me, “This works very quickly.” Next thing I knew, I was feeling gloriously relaxed and sleepy and calm. It took me several minutes to realize I was waking up, not falling asleep. It was already finished.

As I regained my senses, I felt bone tired and a tiny bit crampy, but otherwise fine. They told me they had been able to extract 10 eggs  —  all of which, I would find out the next day, were able to be frozen.

Ten eggs gives me around a 70 percent chance of one of them successfully turning into a baby, if I end up even needing to use them. It means I can (and most likely will) opt out of doing another round, without too much fear of coming up short.

More: The Real Cost of Fertility Treatments & Adoption

In the end, after all the fear and anticipation, I’m amazed at how easy the whole thing was.

Mind you, I’m thrilled at the prospect of never having to do it again. But even with all the injections and expenses and early mornings, it never surpassed the level of “kind of a drag.” I never had any symptoms beyond a little fatigue. And the whole thing took a week and a half. I’ve had colds that were worse. Hell, I’ve had periods that were worse.

Most of all, it feels really, really empowering. When people seem unsure of the correct response, I tell them that “congratulations” is a great one. I didn’t realize how much the fear of running out of time was weighing me down until I decided to do something about it.

And now? I get to live my life, free from the biological ties that bind. Free from the garbage social norms that tell us women in their 30s had better get down to their "real" job and make some babies. Free from the never-ending debates and reductionist thinkpieces about whether we can “have it all.” Or, you know, at least as free as I’ll ever be.

Free to focus on me. Free to double down on a career trajectory that hopefully will pay me back for this procedure many times over. Free to spend my days with dear friends  —  or in front of the TV with my cat  —  and answer to no one but myself, for now.

Free to hold out for the person I want to raise one of these eggs with, rather than settling for one who will do — or going it alone.

It turns out you can freeze time.

Cut Out Those Bad Habits During Your Period & Do These 6 Things Instead

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Believe it or not, there were two times in my life when I thought having my period was fun. These once-in-a-lifetime gleeful menstruation moments occurred when I got my monthly "friend" for the first time and when my monthly friend didn't visit when I found out I was pregnant. Both of these events were memorable and wonderful, and where I stand now — with two sons and a husband with a vasectomy living in my house — they are never going to happen again.

These days, my period is just what you would expect it to be — cumbersome, exhausting and rife with irritability. I know there are plenty of things I am doing wrong to feed this vicious cycle (eating too much junk, snapping at loved ones, crying about puppies, etc.), but according to the experts, there are a few things I could do right to make Shark Week more pleasant.

Forget what you learned in health class. If you want to enjoy all 28 days of your cycle, do things differently this month.

More: How to Navigate Yoga While You Have Your Period

1. Cut the junk

I knew we had to go there, but did it have to be so soon? Dr. Gino Tutera, an OB-GYN with 40 years of experience, tells SheKnows that while diet has a "huge impact" on your body each and every day, what you eat matters even more on your period. During this time, your body becomes even more sensitive to food and food additives because of the shift in hormone levels — namely excess salt and sugar. Hey, don't shoot the messenger. It's doctor's orders: "Avoid salt and additional sugars and drink more water even if you're feeling puffy or bloated. Potassium is helpful during this time — so grab a banana. Drinking small amounts of caffeine may alleviate some discomfort."

In addition to making dietary changes during the Great Flood, holistic health care practitioner Amanda Campbell swears by drinking tea to alleviate discomfort. "Raspberry leaf is known for eliminating cramps and yarrow is known for regulating blood flow, so I make sure those are my main ingredients in my tea. I notice a definite improvement when it comes to my energy levels and just general feeling of 'ick,''' Campbell tell us.

2. Masturbate

This tip has got me all excited, and I'm sure you can guess why. As if we women needed another good reason to masturbate — other than it feels good and "why not?" — sexologist Dr. Megan Stubbs has some life-changing news for ladies with a drawer full of vibrating toys in the nightstand. Stubbs asserts that masturbation can help to relieve even the toughest period pain.

She tells SheKnows, "When we orgasm, our pain tolerance increases and our uterus contracts, which can lessen some of the tension centered there. Many women report having an increase of sexual desire around the time of their period as well, so it seems like a win-win. Of course, everybody is different, so be sure to listen to what yours is telling you."

More: Why Some Women Prefer Masturbation to Sex

3. Manage stress

I have all but given up attempting to keep my cool at home and at work when I am about to start my period. But according to Kathleen Funk of Acufunkture, there may be hope for me yet: I can act like a rational human being all month long by learning techniques to preemptively manage my emotions. I'm all ears…

"Emotional strain plays a huge part in the free flow of qi (vital) and blood in the body. Stress and anxiety can disrupt the cascade of hormones that occur in a woman's menstrual cycle," she tells us. "Emotions like frustration, anger, anxiety and worry can lead to stagnation of qi, which may lead to painful periods. Also, moods have a big effect on how you perceive comfort and discomfort. A person who is stressed or anxious typically has a lower pain threshold and is more reactive to pain and discomfort."

Funk advises, "Quiescent activities like meditation and tai chi can help manage your emotions and maintain the free flow of qi in the body."

4. Take magnesium

Here's the "fun" part of menstruation no one wants to talk about: With your period comes any number of unpleasant symptoms, including digestive issues like bloating and constipation. What does this have to do with magnesium, you ask? Dr. Carolyn Dean, medical advisory board member of the nonprofit Nutritional Magnesium Association, explains to us, "PMS is considered to worsen with constipation and toxicity. Magnesium is a natural detoxifier and muscle relaxer and helps with constipation and painful cramps. If the bowel doesn't empty once a day, toxins can be reabsorbed back into the body from the colon. The longer debris sits in the colon, the more fluid is reabsorbed, making stools more solid and difficult to pass."

Yikes. Looks like I know exactly what I'll be ordering on Amazon Prime tonight to get things moving. Dr. Dean recommends, "The most bio-available form of magnesium is magnesium citrate powder mixed with water and sipped throughout the day. It helps support our energy and supports the liver's natural detoxification pathways, relaxes muscles and relieves cramping."

More: What It's Like to Get Your Period in a Wheelchair

5. Try "alternatives"

If you're one of the happy residents of Colorado or Washington or California or any one of the states where weed is legal for recreation use, this may be the perfectly legal period pain relief tip for you. Rachael Carlevale, founder of Ganjasana, considers the topic of positive menstruation near and dear to her heart.

Carlevale's open-minded approach to holistic menstrual wellness includes yoga and — yes — cannabis. Citing Queen Victoria as a cannabis user for menstrual pain relief in the 19th century, Carlevale explains to SheKnows, "Cannabis is a wonderful companion plant to aid menstrual cramps, headaches, pain and uplifts spirits. I prefer heavy indica cannabis cultivars during my cycle, as they are known pain relievers. When approaching the use of edibles, start with slow and small solutions. And be sure to know your cannabis source before consuming. I prefer organic soil-grown cannabis."

6. Work up a sweat

Trust me — I know. During that time of the month, I feel like my blood has been replaced with glue, and every movement requires the strength of 10,000 men. Literally the last thing I want to do is hop around on a treadmill or stick my ass in the air in yoga class. Donovan Green, celebrity fitness trainer and author of No Excuses Fitness, begs to differ. He says sticking to your regular workout routine can provide specific benefits whilst surfing the Crimson Tide.

"You can substantially reduce cramps and bloating during your workout," he tells SheKnows. "Your body produces less estrogen and puts you in overdrive. This shift in hormone can have a great effect on your body metabolically. You will feel almost as strong as an ox once you get over the cramps and hit the gym."

Green adds, "The only thing to be mindful of is lifting too much heavy weights, which can cause unnecessary bleeding to occur for some but not for all. You should also avoid anything that requires hanging upside down, such as a headstand in yoga. This will cause your uterus to fill with more blood, which can, in fact, cause more bleeding. Ninety-five percent of my clients are female, and they always feel great after their exercise session during their period."

A version of this article was originally published in June 2015.

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