Nicole Kidman may have taken home an armful of Emmy awards for her role in HBO's Big Little Lies, but she also took home an appreciation for a very real problem that's front and center in the show: domestic violence.
"My feminist roots have also led me to U.N. Women and my work as its Goodwill Ambassador," she wrote. "It is in this role that I come to fully understand the barriers that women around the world are facing. I have focused on lending my voice to women who are survivors of violence. The stories I have heard from them have shaken me to the core and changed me forever."
Kidman continues on to ask her "3.5 billion strong and beautiful sisters" in the world to join the fight.
"More than ever, I am aware of the need to support and celebrate each other," she wrote. "I like to believe I am part of a global support group network of 3.4 billion."
Kidman's role in Big Little Lies clearly had a strong effect on her, because this isn't the first time she's spoken out about domestic violence since starring in the series. During her Emmy acceptance speech, she thanked viewers for tackling the subject by watching the show.
"We've shone a light on domestic abuse," she said. "It is a complicated, insidious disease. It exists far more than we allow ourselves to know. It is filled with shame and secrecy. And by you acknowledging me with this award, it shines a light on it even more. So thank you, thank you, thank you. I bow down to you."
By now, you have probably seen photos of Catt Gallinger making the rounds — the Canadian model who had a bad reaction after getting her eyeballs tattooed. This probably raises a lot of questions for you, namely, is eyeball tattooing really a thing? What would make someone want to get it? Is the finished look really worth literally sticking a needle in your eye?
Let's back up for a second and look at what, exactly, is going on here. The procedure Gallinger had is called a scleral tattoo and involves having a mixture of colored ink and saline injected into the whites of your eye. The goal: Having different-colored eyes.
According to the American Academy of Ophthalmology, eyeball tattoos are "even worse than they sound," which I didn't think was possible. Basically, scleral tattoos haven't yet been properly medically researched, but what we do know about them is that they come with some serious risks, which the AAO says includes:
Decreased vision or complete blindness
Infection from the injection or ink
Potential loss of the eye
Sensitivity to light
Feeling like something is in your eye
The AAO also provides footage of a surgery done to help treat complications with a scleral tattoo. (Warning: This video is graphic. And spoiler: The person ultimately had to have their eye removed).
This trend started in Canada about 10 years ago, and a body-modification artist named Luna Cobra claims to be the one who pioneered the procedure. Cobra spoke to Newsweek following Gallinger's botched surgery, saying that he is now trying to make scleral tattoos illegal.
“I’ve been trying to ban this. I think it’s super important that this becomes illegal,” Cobra told Newsweek. “To be clear, this is happening all the time, all over the world.”
Cobra explains that when he first started doing the eyeball tattoos, he would film his work, which resulted in others attempting the procedure, but without his training, leading to major problems.
“I didn’t think people would think so lightly of this [tattooing the eye]," Cobra tells Newsweek. “I thought they would take it more serious. It looks like people are not taking it so serious.”
So what made Gallinger want to dye the whites of her eyes purple? The model tells Time that she did it so the violet hue would stand in contrast to her green eyes and because it's part of expressing who she is. Also, her boyfriend — a body-modification artist who is responsible for the botched procedure — pressured her into it. She also says that she didn't do her research before the tattooing took place.
tat
tat
Turns out, her coercive boyfriend didn't know what he was doing. Gallinger tells Time that he didn't mix the ink with saline and rather than several smaller injections, gave her one large dose over a 10-minute period. Her eye swelled shut that night and didn't heal after three weeks (much longer than most of her friends' one-week recovery period) and she had purple ink streaming out of her eye.
Once she sought medical attention, she received antibiotics and steroid eye drops. Next, she says that she plans to go to the police to report her now-ex-boyfriend, who also botched the informed consent process and didn't explain the risks of the procedure or have her sign any waivers.
In a Facebook post containing a message and photos, Gallinger urges others not to make the same mistakes she did.
"Just please be cautious who you get your mods from and do your research. I don't want this to happen to anyone else," she says.
And remember: If your partner pressures you to dye your eyeballs purple, it probably wasn't meant to be.
Do you remember getting your period in school? It probably doesn’t bring back any great memories. More likely than not, it involved having to find the words to explain to a school nurse what was going on and probably having to do so as other kids looked on.
A teacher in Michigan is hoping to normalize menstruation by creating a supportive environment for her menstruating (or soon-to-be-menstruating) students.
“The students know that they can come ask, and they get a really pretty bag with their needed supplies inside,” Heavner explained in her Facebook post. “It’s discreet and more fun than being handed a giant pad.”
Heavner’s “menstruation care packs” include an Ipsy makeup bag full of pads, panty liners, tampons and disposable wipes.
While the gesture may seem small, for her students, it’s the difference between feeling shame and embarrassment at having to go to the school nurse and feeling understood by a teacher who helps normalize the situation.
“Sure, the office has pads for students, but once you’ve already figured out that there is an issue, the last thing you want to do is head to the office wait in line, ask for what you need, walk back to the bathroom, etc,” writes Heavner. “I am right across from the bathroom and that makes it much more convenient than having to go all the way to the office.”
In her post, Heavner encourages other teachers to do the same and goes as far as to note that she also asks if students need any pads or tampons to take home. For many, this may be a reality as the price of menstrual products could be outside the budget for some families.
We’re so happy the first month of school went well! We’re sending this memo out to announce an exciting initiative we’re implementing for this (first) marking period: Parent report cards. Since we assign your kids three hours per day of homework to compete with schools in wealthy districts — or rather, in other countries — your help is critical to maintain our success. We’re being judged, so you should be judged.
Our parent report cards will evaluate you in the below five categories.
Participation What do the following events have in common: PTA Trike-A-Thon, Yoga-Thon, Kale-a-Thon, Autumnal Equinox Luncheon, Costume Parade, 100th Day of School, plus graduations from kindergarten, first, second, third, fourth and fifth grades? The answer is: We scheduled them in the middle of the day, so you need to ask your boss for more days off work! This is a wake-up call to stop working so many hours, moms (we would say “moms and dads,” but we have 23 kids in the class, and 23 emergency forms came back signed by mom, with mom listed as the primary contact. Do kids in this class even have dads?)
Not only do frequent visits to the classroom show you care, but they’re a terrific way to get to know your kids’ teachers and find out whether they prefer their gift cards to come from Dunkin’ Donuts or Target.
Habits & Attitudes It’s been three years; isn't it time to stop complaining about common core math? Your children pick up your attitudes. A positive outlook goes a long way! I realize you’d rather utilize the methods your own teachers taught you when you were in the third grade, but do you remember what else they taught you? That everyone would be using the metric system by 1978. How'd that work out?
Also regarding attitudes: Children learn from their parents’ examples, especially when it comes to following rules. This means not stealing photography. What are we talking about? Well, we read your mommy blogs, and we saw that a certain parent who shall go unnamed, but let's just call her "Cayden’s mom," wrote that she never orders school photos because “I just go to the website and right-click on them.” Unless she learns the error of her ways this year, Cayden's mom will be receiving an F.
Reading Please make sure you're filling out the reading logs every night, including weekends. Faking the reading logs is unacceptable. If you claim that you read Mo Willems, we will ask your children why the pigeon is sad, and if they don’t know why the pigeon is sad, you’ll be required to explain exactly why the pigeon is sad.
Writing Did you write a letter to the Weekly Gazette now that the school board wants teachers to give back our 1.5 percent raises in exchange for a half-day off for Purim? That would be a great way to set an example of writing and civic engagement. On the other hand, writing letters to the editor in praise of private schools would be a very bad way to demonstrate your writing skills.
Math/computers Besides familiarizing yourself with the common core, please note that we now teach your children coding starting in preschool. Because do you even know what Python is? (If you responded by saying, “It’s a flesh wound” or “We are the Knights who say Ni” you are seriously dating yourself.)
In conclusion, we’re glad you understand the importance of participating in your child’s education. Please make sure you (mom) sign and return this memo within the next three days or you may forget and hold up the post-Columbus Day parent-student luncheon. And yes, in the interest of equality, you are welcome to wait a week for your partner or another fellow caregiver to sign the form, because we understand the totally equal parenting relationship that you have.
Meanwhile, please start working on costumes for our 50th day of school and tell your boss you need to take off for “50th day of school graduation.” We know you're busy working parents who probably also spend more than an hour each day calling your health insurance provider, but trust us: There are ways to fit everything in. You can have it all. See you soon!
Sincerely,
Your Superintendent
Disclaimer: The above is a piece of humor writing. Parents, we sincerely hope you never get a report card again.
Cupcakes. Layer cake. Graham crackers. Sugar cookies. All of the above are totally magical, but what's the common thread? They're all freaking amazing when they have a perfectly light, fluffy, sugary (but not too sugary) layer of homemade buttercream frosting. It's almost enough to make you want to skip all the cake and cookie business and just get right to the icing chase. (Almost.) But making your own buttercream isn't nearly as easy as it sounds. One false move and you end up with a greasy, overly sweet mess.
Unless you have the right pro tips from Allison and Matt Robicelli.
The Robicellis are a husband-and-wife team of cupcake gurus and owners of the famous Robicelli's Bakery in Brooklyn, New York. They're also the co-authors of Robicelli's: A Love Story, with Cupcakes, which, in addition to featuring 50 grown-up recipes for their favorite cupcakes, features sometimes sentimental, sometimes funny and always entertaining stories about their lives, their love and their insights. I'm also fairly certain it's the only cupcake cookbook featuring cursing and buttercream recipes in the form of hilarious comic strips. As you might imagine, they're expert buttercream makers. As you might not have imagined, they're more than glad to share their buttercream ninjutsu skills with the whole world.
French or American?
There are actually two kinds of buttercream: French and American. The Robicellis use French, but it's very labor-intensive and can be unstable in hot weather. So they've developed what must be the world's most superior American buttercream recipe, which we include here. If you think American buttercream is too sweet, this is for sure the recipe for you. If you do want to try their French buttercream recipe, I recommend checking out their book (actually, I recommend that regardless).
Remember, there aren't that many ingredients in buttercream, so what you put into it really does matter. High-quality butter is especially a must, since that's where a majority of your flavor comes from. In fact, Allison says she wouldn't shy away from the more intense flavors of European (cultured) butter just because it's "American" buttercream. According to Allison, "Since we're using butter in our frostings in its raw form, the flavor of the cultured butter will really shine through." She does caution that if you choose European butter, you should taste for richness as you go, as European butter has a slightly higher fat content.
2. The great buttercream controversy: Shortening
Overall, Allison thinks you should avoid using shortening for frosting because it doesn't taste good at all. That said, even the Robicellis have to rely on it occasionally for outdoor events because it's more stable in higher temperatures than butter is. In that case, they substitute no more than 30 percent of the butter for shortening. Sometimes you really do have to consider factors other than flavor, so don't feel guilty if you do use it, but maybe try it without once too.
3. Add sugar slowly, and taste as you go
You probably know you should add the powdered sugar slowly. You don't want to have an I Love Lucy moment with your stand mixer. But you should also taste as you go to ensure you aren't adding too much. Subtle differences in ingredients can make a slight change to how much of any ingredient you might need.
4. Add mascarpone cheese
It's hard to not freak when you see the amount of powdered sugar in buttercream recipes. That stuff is sa-weet! But the Robicellis have figured out the perfect way to get the right balance of sweetness and depth without that cloying flavor: mascarpone cheese.
You had to know they were going to sneak in some fancy foreign ingredient somewhere, right? Professional bakers are well known for their sneakiness (no… I made that up). But I think you should hear them out here. There's actually a very good reason for it.
"Mascarpone will keep it very rich tasting, as it tastes like a solid version of cream," Allison says. "What it does is cut the sweetness of the frosting, making it taste more luxurious than cloying." There's already heavy cream in many buttercream recipes. Using mascarpone is just using a solid version of it. If you can't find mascarpone, you can just substitute with more butter.
5. How to make it pretty (a note on food coloring)
If you check out the Robicellis' cookbook carefully, you'll start to notice that most are, well, cream colored. Any that do have color come by their hue through added natural ingredients like strawberries.
As Allison points out, "I would never make a roast chicken blue because it was my favorite color, so why a cake?" She goes on to explain, "We try to put [the focus] on flavors and textures, decorating the cupcakes with things like nut brittles, fresh fruit compotes and homemade candy."
That said, sometimes food coloring is just a must. The Robicellis know that sometimes you have to have cupcakes that, say, perfectly match the exact shade of green on Princess Tiana's dress. Far be it from her to destroy your little one's dreams of princess party perfection! When that's the case, Allison recommends gel food colorings. You can find them at baking and craft stores, and they're much more consistent in color, so you use a lot less (since the ones you buy at the grocery store are so watery).
5. Whip it till it hurts
Allison wants you to know that it's all about the air. In the comic strip version of the recipe, the exact words are, "Beat the f*** out of that shit!!! Beat it like we beat the Russians in Rocky IV!" Allison explained what that means: "It's all about beating well and incorporating enough air till it's very fluffy, but not so much that you end up melting it. Best way to find this point is the old-fashioned way: Taste as you go. When it feels light like whipped cream, nearly melts on the tongue and doesn't feel so heavy like something that will sit in your stomach for days, you know you're good."
6. Help! My buttercream broke!
Just like a hollandaise or mayo, buttercream can break. Allison explains that it's because the emulsion of butter has separated into fat and water. But if you beat it until you break it, all is not lost. Allison shared some tips for those with buttercream disasters.
Put the frosting in the refrigerator, and allow it to harden for a bit, then beat it again on high speed until it comes together.
Continue beating while adding a little bit more butter, tiny pieces at a time.
Worse comes to worst? Frost the cupcakes anyway, then coat the whole shebang with crumbled-up cookies or chopped nuts. No one will know!
Robicelli's basic American buttercream frosting recipe
If you can't find mascarpone, just replace it with 8 ounces of butter.
Yields 24 cupcakes' worth of frosting
Total time: 5 – 10 minutes
Ingredients:
3 sticks (1-1/2 cups) unsalted butter
8 ounces mascarpone
1/4 cup heavy cream (plus more for thinning, if necessary)
2 cups powdered sugar
Directions:
With a hand or stand mixer, beat the butter, mascarpone and heavy cream until it becomes fluffy.
Add the powdered sugar 1/4 cup at a time. Taste the frosting frequently to ensure you're not adding too much.
Once it's all incorporated, increase the mixer speed to high, and beat it until it's fluffy and light. Taste. If it seems heavy, you can add a little extra heavy cream a little at a time to thin it.
Scream "'Merca!" because you now have the perfect American buttercream.
The Kardashians have some of the most envyworthy hair in Hollywood. Luckily for us, Kourtney Kardashian is spilling her secret to silky, smooth locks, and — surprise, surprise — it’s not some untouchable A-list product, but a cooking ingredient likely sitting in your kitchen pantry.
The reality star revealed her hair care tip on her website. The post, titled “My Formula for Healthy Hair,” began with Kardashian explaining that she typically uses Rahua products to shampoo and condition her hair. However, as some might know, washing your hair every day isn’t always the best for it. Frequent washes can strip your hair of its natural oils and leave it dry and brittle.
As a result, Kardashian came up with a unique alternative to keep her hair shiny and clean on her off days. “Every now and then, I’ll rinse my hair with apple cider vinegar,” Kardashian wrote. “It’s known for holding in moisture without stripping your hair of its natural oils.”
Though apple cider vinegar is typically associated with salad dressings and marinades, it also has properties to softly clean your hair and scalp as well as add a subtle sheen. And if you thought Kardashian’s pantry shampoo substitute was genius, the Keeping Up with the Kardashians star also revealed her tip to keeping her locks healthy even as she’s sleeping. “The only other secret I have for healthy hair is I always sleep on a pillowcase made of 100-percent silk,” Kardashian wrote. “The natural amino acids in the silk are really good for both your skin and hair.”
It can be hard to stay body-positive when you grow up in a dance studio. There are always people who think that it is OK to critique other people’s bodies, to comment on their weight or to tell them they need to shave any visible trace of body hair. I started taking dance classes when I was in kindergarten, before I had any idea what it felt like to be self-conscious. When puberty hit and my body began to go through a series of physical changes, I couldn’t help but feed into some of the body-shaming that other dancers threw around.
After I got my first period, I would nervously anticipate the imminent week every month during which I would have to show up at my dance studio in little more than tights and a leotard while menstruating. Dance attire is purposefully made of thin material that conforms to your body to make it easy for your instructor to see the technique of your movements. But that same lack of coverage means that every part of your body is on display at all times.
I would walk into class convinced that everyone would be able to tell that I was on my period. Would they be able to see the outline of my pad through my leotard? If I wore a skirt or shorts over my leotard, would everyone know that I was trying to cover any potential leaks?
Add to that anxiety the one that came with managing cramps and bloating while wearing compressive, tight-fitting clothes, and it was a monthly nightmare for me.
I noticed on multiple occasions that menstrual pain altered the fluidity of my movements or hindered my endurance during across-the-floor exercises. But the reality was that for as painful or uncomfortable as the week was for me, it was never enough to warrant any slack being cut. Menstrual pain was not treated as a legitimate reason for feeling fatigued or being off your dance game.
The world of dance tends to value appearance over comfort. When recital time rolled around, my dance instructors would advise my class to go commando onstage to help minimize the bulk and the bulging of our costumes. Dance costumes are notoriously itchy thanks to the abundance of glitter and sequins that typically adorn the bodices. The thought of forgoing underwear and having that irritating fabric brush right up against your skin sounds unpleasant enough, but having to worry about your period leaking straight through your costume onstage is an even worse thought.
On most recital weekends, not only am I worried about nailing down the routine, but because of how taboo the subject of menstruating is in the studio, I’m also worried about tampon strings peeking out of my leotard or not having enough time to change menstrual products between dance numbers.
I’m not sure whether I’ll ever be totally comfortable with dancing while on my period. The potential for leakage will probably always be at the back of my mind, and dealing with menstrual pain may never get easier. But if I have learned one thing over the course of my dance career, it’s to never feel ashamed for getting my period. Menstruation is difficult for all dancers to manage. There aren’t many period-related issues that I can encounter that another dancer before me hasn’t already experienced. Embarrassment over a natural bodily function shouldn’t prevent someone from feeling confident in their body, whether on the stage or in the studio.
Since the beginning of my time as a parent, I’ve been completely against co-sleeping — for my family, at least.
Don’t get me wrong; different sleeping situations work differently for each family, and that’s great. But for us, this wasn’t ever going to be a good option. My husband and I like our space when we sleep (me probably a little bit more than him), and I didn’t breastfeed either of my children for long because of extremely low supply due to a breast reduction I had in high school. Perhaps if I were breastfeeding, co-sleeping would have been on the table out of pure convenience, but at this point in the game, I guess we’ll never know. My husband and I cherish our intimate moments as well, and having a baby or toddler in the bed made those times more challenging. So, we always opted against co-sleeping — both with our now-9-year-old son and our 1-year-old daughter.
Things were going great in the beginning. Our daughter started sleeping through the night at just 2 months old, and we were all happy because... well... sleep is truly priceless. Then at about 8 months, she hit some major sleep regression, and things took a turn for the worse.
It started one spring night when she woke up in the wee hours of the morning. She doesn't cry when she wakes up; instead, she jumps in her crib, which happens to be at the foot of our bed in our tiny one-bedroom New York City apartment. When we tried ignoring her jumping-bean antics (it was, after all, 3 a.m.), she crawled down to the other end of the crib, reached out, and started tickling my husband's toes. In our half-asleep, half-awake confusion, we brought her into the bed with us — and that was our mistake.
We thought it would be just a one-night thing, but it most certainly was not. Our daughter simply refused to be ignored — and refused to fall back to sleep by herself. I would try rocking her back to sleep, but all attempts ended in one thing and one thing only: her sleeping in the bed with us.
As much as I loved waking up to baby giggles in the morning, I hated having no space, being kicked and hit in the face during the night and worrying that I would accidentally roll over on top of her. I became a zombie during the day. I stopped being able to function as a human being and began living on coffee the same way I did when we had first brought our newborns home from the hospital. I was hating every moment of this unwilling co-sleeping, and I knew we'd only brought it on ourselves.
Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months. Before we knew it, our daughter was coming into our bed every single night at about 11 p.m. and staying until morning. The days were getting more and more difficult, as was the epic parent guilt that was living inside me. "Should I be enjoying co-sleeping?" I wondered. "Should I be more compassionate? Was I just being an asshole?" I honestly wasn’t sure, and my lack of sleep toyed with me.
The misery continued until my daughter was almost a year old, when my husband was sent away to an army training for 30 days. I was alone with our two children for those 30 days, and I decided to make it my mission to get my daughter back into her own bed, every single night. It was our 30-day co-sleeping rehab.
The first couple of nights were rough, and I will admit I had to use the cry-it-out method. But she got the message once we were on night four. And in that moment, I brought sanity — and even some sleep — back into my life.
Moral of the story: I needed to learn to tune out the noise and the mom guilt and focus on what was best for us all. For whatever reason, my daughter clearly needed to be in our bed during those months, and she wanted us to be her own personal security blankets. But enough was enough, and we learned together how to have our own space at night again. Now, we all sleep like babies — in our own corners of the bedroom.
Thankfully, we're about to get it thanks to Busy Philipps and Amy Schumer who will star in a flick called I Feel Pretty about a delusional woman (Schumer) who is convinced the cycling classes are actual magic for her body. Michelle Williams and Emily Ratajkowski will round out the cast.
The official synopsis from IMDB reads, "Renee Bennett (Schumer) knows what it's like to be average in a world of the genetically blessed. After falling off an exercise bike and banging her head, she believes a spell has suddenly made her gorgeous. Except to everyone else, she looks exactly the same. Renee's new confidence suddenly sees her climbing the ranks at the cosmetics company she works for, getting the respect of her idol and boss, Avery LeClaire (Williams). Ultimately Renee realizes 'the spell' has lifted, but through the process learns true beauty is not skin deep."
Philipps' husband Mark Silverstein is directing the flick, which is reportedly still filming.
SoulCylce is ripe for a good laugh. It's right up there with juice cleanses and waist trainers. Pair that with a host of awesome girl power and this movie has the potential to be the next Bridesmaids.
SoulCycle doesn't mind the constant laugh at its expense, though, so don't worry about some sweaty, spandex-wearing ladies seeking vengeance against the film.
Ryan Gosling is hosting Saturday Night Live tonight for the show's Season 43 premiere episode. Yes, tonight is the night. And the promo for the episode promises more hilarity than ever from the actor, who first hosted the show back in December 2015.
In the promo, Gosling promises to give us all his soul, which is quite the promise considering he can't even get in the building.
"OK, but you're still going to need a visitor's pass to get upstairs," a security officer tells Gosling, who then tries to outsmart the guy by pretending to leave and then running to the elevators... Only to be stopped by another two security guards before he can even make it to the up button.
"Everyone's doing a cracker jack job, honestly," Gosling says as he tries to save face and exit.
ryan gosling snl hosting promo clip 1
ryan gosling snl hosting promo clip 1
Not only will the Season 43 premiere be epic because it means we will get a piece of Gosling's soul, but Jay Z will also be performing. Yup, you read that right. Jay Z and Ryan Gosling sharing the same stage. The star-powered hotness is almost too much to handle.
Gosling won't just be taking the stage to provide us with some much-needed laughs. He will also, no doubt, be promoting his new film Blade Runner 2049 during the show. Wait, maybe Harrison Ford will make a surprise appearance? Can that please happen? Please.
Every six months, I go to the psychiatrist. I was diagnosed with clinical depression and generalized anxiety in my late 20s, and since then, I’ve taken a handful of medicines to cope with both. I’ve changed prescriptions over time because eventually drugs stop working, but this time, when we needed to alter my current one (I had not been feeling awesome), I started wondering if this is what I had to look forward to from here on out. Would changing medicines on a regular basis as I get older (I’m in my late 30s now) because my anxiety and depression would get more complicated to treat become my new normal? Would I always be experimenting with combinations and new drugs to figure out how to feel better?
It turns out that this is only kind of true. According to Dr. Elizabeth Trattner, anxiety and depression do rise in women as they age, particularly between the ages of 35 and 50 (when it peaks). There’s depression related to menstruation, such as premenstrual dysphoric disorder, prenatal and postpartum depression and anxiety and transitional depression, occurring when women move into perimenopause and then into menopause, ending sometime in one’s 50s. What these three depressions have in common is the increasing and decreasing of hormones, specifically estrogen, which plays a significant role in regulating brain function.
Talia San Roman, a board-certified psychiatric mental health nurse practitioner in Arizona, says that a low-functioning/underactive thyroid can produce symptoms of anxiety and depression, which is why your doctor may test your thyroid first before prescribing psychiatric medication.
There’s also the fact that as changes in our bodies take hold, our physical appearances change, as do levels of energy. It’s vital that health care practitioners take this into account, says San Roman.
“We have to do our best to choose medications that will not cause drowsiness or weight gain,” explains San Roman. “Otherwise, the patient will not be compliant and you will not see the patient outcome you hoped for.”
Treating anxiety and depression can also be made complicated as we age because of chronic illnesses like cancer and heart disease, which are more common among women. According to the National Institute of Health, 1 in 4 women will die of heart disease. Doctors run into the wall of having to make sure that any antianxiety medication an individual is prescribed does not have an adverse drug interaction with any other medication they may be taking — in some cases, limiting medication options.
While anxiety and depression tend to exist in tandem and exacerbate one another, both are unique and vary according to who is living with them.
“I tend to describe anxieties like snowflakes — no two are alike,” says life coach Trish Barillas. “I feel the difference from your 20s to your late 30s would be the knowledge. When we are in our 20s, we are still trying to discover ourselves and our bodies. There is the unknown happening when you leave high school, friends and your home and it comes all at once. I’ve seen anxiety spike amongst women around transitional times.”
Barillas suggests that anxiety in many women is triggered by digestive system issues and that herbal supplements may help alleviate anxiety during the menstrual cycles by balancing out hormones.
People age, but standards of beauty remain the same.
Pregnancy, menstruation and menopause alter both how we look on the outside and how we see ourselves, which can contribute to depression and anxiety. In addition, there are the lifestyle changes that might arise as we age, such as the task of caring for an older parent, a responsibility that is assumed to be the domain of women.
There’s also the reality check, says Nicole Casanova a personal-development expert who has treated folks with anxiety and depression for more than 15 years.
“Anxiety and depression are the body’s wise signals, ushering us to make changes,” explains Casanova. “As we age, the severity of this reality check can become more and more harsh, making it more difficult to get a handle on. For example, not having reached your goals at 50 can initiate a more intense depression than for a 30-year-old woman.”
While there are challenges to treating anxiety and depression as we age, not everyone is impacted by them, and for the most part, they do abate with time, especially when they’re caused by hormonal changes like those in menopause.
When seeking treatment, be specific — ask your potential therapist and/or psychiatrist if they have experience working with people who live with depression and anxiety related to aging, trauma, etc. And definitely surround yourself with other people who are good listeners.
“Social support is connected to physiological changes,” says Dr. Roselyn Smith, a psychologist in Miami, Florida. “Getting physical affection from loved ones increases oxytocin, a hormone that can create feelings of well being.”
For decades, the Kennedy family has been surrounded by rumors about all manner of events in family members' personal lives; these rumors are arguably one of the reasons we as an American public keep tabs on the Kennedys. And the cult of celebrity that has sprung up around President John F. Kennedy in the years following his assassination means that any shocking story connected to him, in particular, might result in extra attention and speculation.
Such is the case with People magazine's resurrection of the topic and the subsequent inquest into the death of Mary Pinchot Meyer, alleged mistress of JFK, who was murdered under mysterious circumstances. While a possible suspect was fingered, there have been no conclusive results about who killed Pinchot Meyer or why. Some have gone as far as to speculate that the only way to logically explain Pinchot Meyer's death is to connect the dots back to JFK. It's all very interesting, to be sure, but should be taken with a grain of salt.
According to People, Mary Pinchot was born into high society. Raised in wealth, she was rubbing shoulders with the wealthy progeny of America's leaders for most of her life; that elite circle tightened after her marriage to high-ranking CIA official Cord Meyer in 1945. But before she met Cord, Pinchot Meyer met a young Kennedy at a dance. Nina Burleigh, author of the book A Very Private Woman: The Life and Unsolved Murder of Presidential Mistress Mary Meyer, commented that "[Pinchot Meyer] met JFK at a prep school dance. They were teens. He supposedly cut in on her date."
JFK Mary Pinchot Meyer Tweet
JFK Mary Pinchot Meyer Tweet
Years later, during which she graduated from Vassar College and married Cord, Pinchot Meyer reportedly began seeing Kennedy once more. Burleigh again comments on this with the evidence that "her name first appears on the White House logs in October 1962. She was by his side. [...] She was often signed in when Jackie was away." Apparently, Pinchot Meyer was such a frequent visitor (when the opportunity allowed) that Burleigh squeezed this intel out of a former White House staffer: "White House counsel Myer Feldman told me, ‘Mary was almost a part of the furniture.'"
It's believed that Pinchot Meyer may have gotten Kennedy into some very far-out things, like the advocation and use of LSD, which is what Burleigh reported in 2012 for a piece on Pinchot Meyer's murder in The Daily Beast. One source close to Pinchot Meyer believes this is why she was killed; however, her proximity to both the president and the CIA is enough to raise a red flag as well. "'She became a beacon for Jack as he explored a new trajectory after the near-calamity of the Cuban missile crisis,'" Burleigh's source, CIA official Wistar Janney, said, adding that Pinchot Meyer "was his partner, if not leader, in the peace-seeking behavior that inspired his assassination in the first place."
Burleigh's thorough examination of Pinchot Meyer's murder for The Daily Beast is juicy, to say the least, and well worth the read, but what it does make clear is that Pinchot Meyer was too well connected for her own good. She was reportedly a vibrant and intelligent woman who began indulging in the counter-culture of the 1960s before the counter-culture became a thing. Her ease with those who were a bit more starched-collar and stiff upper lip is implied, in many accounts, to have helped her find a place in Kennedy's heart as well as the secret echelons of Washington, D.C., and the like.
It's believed that the timing of Pinchot Meyer's murder is no accident. With fears that she was already being covertly assessed — “I was told in the last few years of her life, she told friends that she thought people were breaking into her house, rifling through her things," Burleigh noted — Pinchot Meyer's late life was one shrouded in mystery. Despite living in an artist's studio in Georgetown following her divorce, the feeling of freedom and possibility permeating her life, she was murdered shortly after the release of the Warren Commission's report. The documents from the Warren Commission detail a full analysis of the assassination of Kennedy. The belief here is that Pinchot Meyer's name may have come up during this time and possibly the conclusion was made that she was too much of a liability, given her proximity to classified information, to remain alive.
So, on October 12, 1964, Pinchot Meyer "was shot in the head. Passersby heard screams and a witness looked over the wall and saw a man standing near her body. The police came and shortly arrested a black male [Ray Crump Jr.] soaking wet who said he fell into the Potomac while fishing. [...] No gun was ever found," Burleigh told People. The investigation into her death trailed off and, for now, remains one of the most elusive mysteries in the history of Washington, D.C.
What's clear is that this story and its connection to JFK tells us that his life was far more complex and perhaps darker than we like to remember. As for Pinchot Meyer, her life it seems was vibrant and full of possibility; that she seems reduced to an enigmatic footnote in this life of an American president feels wholly unfair.
Just when it looked like time was going to run out, ABC has (finally!) secured the third and final judge for the network's American Idol reboot — just before filming is set to begin. And, in exciting news for fans of the reality singing competition, that final judge is none other than music legend Lionel Richie.
The news comes close on the heels of confirmation that country superstar Luke Bryan would be joining the judges' panel alongside the first-signed judge, Katy Perry. In a statement via ABC, Richie said, "As a singer, songwriter and producer, I feel I can bring a great deal of experience to the table. It's going to be so much fun!"
Richie isn't the only one excited about his new gig, either. In addition to the predictable outpouring of support from fans, fellow judge Bryan couldn't help gushing over the news that he'd be sitting next to his own personal idol, whom he called his "hero."
American Idol Luke Bryan
American Idol Luke Bryan
Sofia Richie, Lionel's daughter, also expressed her enthusiasm over her dad's new role with a sweet post shared to her Instagram.
Although we won't get to see the trio of judges in action until the series premiere in the 2018 season, Perry, Bryan and Richie are slated to make their first joint appearance on ABC's Good Morning America on Wednesday.
Get ready, world — baby Speidi is finally here. On Sunday, reality TV stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt welcomed their first child together, a little boy named Gunner Stone.
According to Us Weekly, Gunner made his debut at precisely 3:06 p.m., weighing 6 pounds, 12 ounces, and measuring 19 inches long. Although a baby's hair and eye color hair at birth often change as the baby develops, little Gunner could very well hold onto the reported blond hair and blue eyes he inherited from his parents.
The couple have yet to personally address the momentous occasion, aside from tweeting out the Us Weekly article. However, their rep did issue a brief statement. "Heidi and Spencer are proud parents of a healthy baby boy as of this afternoon," the rep told the publication.
The pair first announced the pregnancy on the cover of Us Weekly in April, with Pratt saying at the time, "Heidi has wanted to be a mom since the day I met her. She has planned for and thought about this."
Speidi baby 2
Speidi baby 2
Montag echoed Pratt's comment, telling the magazine, "I wanted a baby three years ago. Spencer was a little hesitant. Then one thing after another came up. We had work obligations, like Celebrity Big Brother in the U.K., which I did not want to be pregnant for. I'm actually really thankful we waited. I thought I was ready in my 20s, but with everything we had going on, it just wouldn't have been a good situation for us."
Since sharing the news of their first child's impending arrival, Montag has been sharing her journey via social media. Just last week, the couple posted several photos from their whimsical maternity shoot.
Speidi baby 1
Speidi baby 1
No word yet on whether or not Pratt brought his healing crystals into the delivery room to help aid Montag during the birth. So, stand by for that.
Seriously, though... could Prince Harry and Meghan Markle get any cuter? Despite thinking they'd completely pegged out the adorable meter, this royally sweet pair stepped it up once more during the closing ceremony of the Invictus Games. Spoiler alert: they even shared a public kiss!
The 33-year-year old royal and his Suits star girlfriend of over a year kept it cozy throughout the night on Saturday — leaning into each other, laughing and just generally looking besotted with each other.
Image: Getty Images
During the ceremony, Harry briefly left Markle's side so he could deliver an impassioned speech. "Don't just move on from these games with happy memories," he urged the crowd. "Instead, make an Invictus goal for yourselves. Let the examples of service and resilience that you have seen inspire you to take action to improve something — big or small — in your life, for your family, or in your community. Let's create a ripple effect of the Invictus spirit across our nations, that will be the real legacy of this extraordinary week."
Markle looked on in pride during Harry's speech as she stood with her mother, Doria Radlan.
Later, seated in a private box at Air Canada Centre where the 2017 Invictus Games took place, Prince Harry and Markle took in performances by powerhouse talents such as Bruce Springsteen, Bryan Adams and Kelly Clarkson.
Although the couple kept their relationship covert for the first year, it seems evident they are no longer hiding anything. And if the rumors are true, a royal wedding could be right around the corner.
If the news about the mass shooting in Las Vegas hasn't seriously shaken you, chances are you just haven't heard about it yet.
Mass tragedies like the attack on the concert in Las Vegas take a real toll on everyone — not just those who are directly affected by it. While as of this writing, we don't yet know the motivations of the Vegas shooter and there's no evidence right now he was motivated by terrorist intent, the reality is terrorists know this too, which is why mass killings are used so often to terrorize and are, unfortunately, a very effective tool for causing fear and panic. This is especially true for people who are already vulnerable thanks to a mental illness like depression, PTSD or anxiety.
However, even if an attack is deliberately designed to be terrifying, that doesn't mean we have to let the perpetrators win, says Dr. Elizabeth Lombardo, a clinical psychologist and author of A Happy You, a book about how to create your own sense of well-being, even in difficult times.
"When senseless acts of violence occur, we try to make sense of them in the best way we know how," she says, "but what we do to feel in control again can actually make us feel worse." Fortunately, there are things we can do to stay mentally healthy during a traumatic time.
Rule No. 1: Stop the information overload
Our instinct may be to get all the information we can, but once we've ascertained the basics of the situation, more information doesn't help and can worsen depression, anxiety and stress. Instead, she says to spend less time passively reading (or watching) the news and more time actively doing something positive.
The next step is to make sure you're practicing good self-care
This means not getting so caught up in what's happening around us that you forget to exercise, eat well and connect with loved ones. You may feel like you don't "deserve" to be happy when others are suffering, but Lombardo points out that your suffering for them doesn't help them, or you, at all. In fact, wallowing in sadness only leads to more inaction.
Third, help others
The best way to feel like the world is a good place is to make it a good place. "We can use devastation to inspire good by reaching out to others and doing little acts of kindness," Lombardo says. You can help with the specific tragedy, like donating blood for those affected by the Las Vegas shooting or money to a Kickstarter fund to help the victims and their families. Or you can simply work on doing good where you are by finding ways to help those around you. It can be as simple as opening a door and offering a kind word to a stranger, she says.
It's more than understandable to see the perpetrators of such a heinous crime and want to hate them or even hate a whole group of people you associate with them. However, this is a waste of time and your mental resources. "More hate does not equal love, it just equals more hate," Lombardo says. "And adding more negative energy to a trauma doesn't help."
Instead of looking for ways to lash out at those you hold responsible, find ways to help prevent future tragedies. Not only will this help other people, but it can help you stay grounded in the moment and fight off the depression and anxiety that naturally come with such an event. And if you do find yourself becoming overwhelmed by the traumatic event or unable to stop thinking about it, it is time to seek professional help. A therapist can help you process your feelings around the event before they spiral into a deeper problem.
Ultimately, the best thing we can do to fight evil in the world is to do more good — and you can't do that if you're not staying physically and mentally healthy.
Originally published June 2016. Updated October 2017.
Around 7.5 million Americans suffer from psoriasis, a chronic inflammatory disease of the immune system that causes the skin cells to grow at an accelerated rate. It usually occurs on the scalp, knees, elbows, hands and feet, but can appear anywhere on the body.
Far more than just a physical condition, psoriasis can cause feelings of self-consciousness, impact every aspect of a person's life and influence everyday decisions people who don't have psoriasis don't have to think twice about, such as the clothes they wear. Certain styles and fabrics may aggravate the affected skin, while others are much more comfortable.
Dr. Tien Nguyen, a dermatologist at Orange Coast Memorial Medical Center in Fountain Valley, California, recommends soft, breathable fabrics for people with psoriasis and advises against wearing itchy clothing. "Anything that causes sweat or irritation of psoriatic plaques can worsen the condition," she warns.
As a general rule, natural is good and synthetic is bad when it comes to psoriasis. Common synthetic fabrics include polyester, nylon and elastane. Check the garment labels before you buy.
Here are three fabrics that should be staples in your wardrobe if you have psoriasis.
1. Cotton
The higher the cotton content in a fabric, the more comfortable it will be next to the skin — and comfort is key for people with psoriasis. As a soft, breathable fabric, cotton should be the top choice for someone with psoriasis (or very dry or sensitive skin).
Dr. Delphine Lee, a dermatologist at Providence Saint John’s Health Center in Santa Monica, California, highlights an Italian clinical trial comparing the effect on plantar psoriasis of socks containing a synthetic fiber with standard cotton socks. The trial showed no difference between the two fabrics, yet patient global satisfaction was statistically lower for the socks containing synthetic fiber.
2. Modal
Modal, a type of rayon, is a manufactured fiber, but is not synthetic — it’s made from wood pulp, a naturally occurring raw material. Modal is an ideal fabric for people with psoriasis because it is lightweight, smooth, soft and extremely breathable. It is similar in texture to cotton, but less likely to shrink, fade or pill. Look for undergarments and workout clothes made of modal, as they wick moisture away from the skin and dry faster in heavy sweating conditions. Often, people with psoriasis, particularly inverse psoriasis — lesions under the armpits, on the groin, under the breasts and in other natural folds of the body — find sweating a trigger because it stimulates itching and scratching of the skin and worsens psoriasis symptoms.
Breathability is an important factor, but it's not the only consideration. For example, linen is a very breathable fabric, but it can be uncomfortable against patches of psoriasis because of the uneven, slightly raised surface. Silk, on the other hand, is cool and soothing, even during flare-ups, because it has great moisture-wicking properties, helps to regulate body temperature, is hypoallergenic and doesn't create static, so it won't cling to the skin.
As well as breathable fabrics, opt for loose, comfortable styles. "People with psoriasis may find physical friction from tight clothing irritating," says Lee. "It is also important to be aware of fabrics that are irritating on an individual basis, for example, some people find wool to be very itchy. It is best to avoid fabrics that cause any irritating symptoms, particularly during flare-ups."
As a Victoria’s Secret model, a mom of two and the face for dozens of cosmetics and fashion brands, Adriana Lima is likely always on the go. So after a long day of photo shoots and meetings, it makes sense that she would want to top off her night with a nice, relaxing shower. What’s a little unusual is that she likes to shower with her makeup on — not because she’s lazy — but because she likes the way it runs over her body.
Lima opened up about her weird beauty habit in an interview with InStyle, in which she also outed herself as a low-key mascara fanatic. In the interview, Lima talked about her obsession with mascara (particularly Maybelline’s Falsies and Lash Sensational) and how the blacker, the better. “I love mascara on the eyes. I like it to be very black, and I like when you just apply lots of layers,” Lima said. “So on my days off, I just apply over and over and over.”
Lima’s obsession with mascara is so extreme that she sometimes takes showers for funsies just so she can see the mascara run down her skin and reapply it afterward. “When I shower, the mascara runs over my skin, I wipe it off, and I apply it on top again. I absolutely love it,” Lima said.
Showering with mascara isn’t the only unconventional part of Lima’s beauty routine. The Victoria’s Secret Angel also revealed her secret to shiny, luscious hair. To get her runway-ready locks, Lima mixes her conditioner with — get this — a mashed avocado. After spreading the concoction on her tresses, Lima puts on a shower cap and waits 15 minutes before rinsing it out. The secret, which is passed down from Brazilian women in her family, transforms Lima’s hair from its naturally dry texture to silky lusciousness.
“You take one avocado — I am not joking. You mash the avocado, you mix with whatever conditioner you have, you put it on your hair, and you put on a shower cap for like 15 minutes,” Lima said. “When you wash it off, your hair is gonna be shiny, shiny, shiny!”
Though we don’t normally associate avocado — or mascara — with the shower, we’re down for anything. If it’ll give us Adriana Lima-level looks, we guess a guacamole-conditioner hybrid is worth a try.
In extremely distressing news coming out of Las Vegas on the morning of Monday, Oct. 2, news outlets are reporting that quite possibly the deadliest mass shooting in American history has taken place. According to NBC, at the time of reporting, at least 50 people were killed and 200 were injured when 64-year-old shooter Stephen Paddock attacked the Route 91 Harvest Country Music Festival near the Mandalay Bay Hotel on the evening on Sunday, Oct. 1.
Some of country music's finest were performing on Sunday at the Route 91 music festival, including Jason Aldean. Aldean was reportedly onstage performing at the time of the shooting, wherein Paddock opened fire on the concert from the 32nd floor of the Mandalay Bay Hotel. While Aldean was confirmed to be safe and unharmed in the wake of the shooting by Entertainment Tonight, he did not remain silent about the deeply upsetting events that took place.
On his personal Instagram page, Aldean posted a photo that read, "Prayers for Las Vegas" as well as a full caption that confirmed that he and his crew were safe but that this shooting was incredibly tragic.
"Tonight has been beyond horrific. I still don't know what to say but wanted to let everyone know that Me and my Crew are safe. My Thoughts and prayers go out to everyone involved tonight. It hurts my heart that this would happen to anyone who was just coming out to enjoy what should have been a fun night," he wrote.
Jason Aldean Las Vegas Shooting Reaction
Jason Aldean Las Vegas Shooting Reaction
His wife, Brittany Aldean, echoed the country music singer's thoughts, posting her own message to her Instagram account asking for prayers for Las Vegas as well. "We are safe... our angels were definitely watching over us tonight," she wrote. "No words for what happened... Just horrific. Praying for everyone."
In times like these, it's not uncommon for celebrities to comment en masse on social media about the horrific nature of such a distressing event. As such, it would appear that a great many country music stars are now commenting on how upsetting it was to be present during the shooting while praying for the safety of those who survived the shooting and sending condolences for those who were killed.
While the country music community isn't the only group of celebrities commenting on the Las Vegas shooting at this time, it is heartening to see them rallying around one another. As more news emerges about this event, it is a bit of a comfort to see that thoughts and prayers are coming from them and being sent out to those who need it most.
Jared Leto has pretty much worked with everyone and anyone in Hollywood at this point in his career. From Brad Pitt all the way back in his Fight Club days to Will Smith and Margot Robbie in the 2016 film Suicide Squad, but the cast and crew of the upcoming film Blade Runner 2049 seemed to have a particular impact on Leto.
The film picks up 30 years after the original and tells the story of 'K' (Ryan Gosling), a blade runner who uncovers secrets buried deep in the past that fuel him to search for the missing Rick Deckard (Harrison Ford).
Leto told SheKnows when he was cast in the film as Niander Wallace, a character he describes as a mix between Gandhi and Steve Jobs, it was a big moment for him as an actor. "You get religious and start praying in thanks to the gods of cinema that you have the opportunity to work with such a talented group of people," he said of his reaction to booking the film. "And then your next prayer is, 'Please don't fuck this up.'"
He added, "You're seriously hit by a lightning bolt filled with gratitude and humility and, you know, it's just an insane group of talented artists and you go on an adventure with this really awesome family of people."
That "awesome family of people," includes director Denis Villeneuve and stars Gosling, Ford, Robin Wright and Ana de Armas.
But it was Ford who seemed to shine above the rest for Leto.
"He's Indiana. He's Han. He's Deckard. He's Harrison. What I think is just so powerful is how much of himself he brings to the roles and the parts that he plays and how much richer the characters and the films are as a result," Leto explained. "I mean, Mosquito Coast is one of my favorite films in a performance by him that was just — he was possessed in that movie. And, my god, what a beautiful film."
Filming scenes with Ford was also a powerful experience for Leto, "I think the scene with Harrison was the most intense. It was a very emotional scene and a day I'll never forget."
He continued, "It's kind of like playing tennis with the best tennis player in the world. They can put the ball exactly where they want it, and they can make you feel a lot better about yourself, probably. And Harrison's that way. He can, with a gesture, with his presence and just by the faith that he has in you. He gave me that gift and that really was so inspiring, the confidence that he had in me. Those scenes really meant a lot and affected me deeply. I had the opportunity to play with one of the best ever. Harrison is a hero to me. He is a legend. I think that scene, in particular, I'll carry with me for the rest of my life."
