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The Ultimate Stain-Removal Guide for Whatever Lands on Your Clothes

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Stain removal tips
Image: Erik Isakson/Getty Images
Stains are pretty much the ultimate day-ruiner — and when you start your morning with a nice, fresh makeup smear all over your favorite white shirt, well, things are pretty much all downhill from there. Even your trusty little bleach pen can't salvage a bright red lipstick smudge mixed with a dollop of foundation, and next thing you know, you're so rattled, you end up throwing a splash of coffee into the mix. Ugh.

But before you throw out that shirt, there are solutions, we promise.

Sure, Pinterest has lots of DIY tips for stains, but most of them are pretty tricky to follow. So just for you, we've gathered up all our favorite stain-busting tricks in one place — and this guide tackles almost any gross substance that could potentially ruin your best outfit. We're talking blood, sweat, grass, coffee, makeup, juice and vomit here.

Trust us, these hacks really work. Because saving your favorite clothes is always worth the extra elbow grease.

For all of your clothes

  • The earlier you catch a stain, the better. If you're out and about (and the item isn't dry-clean only), pretreat the affected area with something like Spray 'n Wash's Stain Stick, Shout wipes or a Tide pen. (If none of these are available, you can at least wet the stain to keep it from setting as completely. An ice cube from your drink is the perfect way to wet the spot. Careful to just dab — don't rub the stain into the fibers of your clothes.) Then wash the item as soon as you get home.
  • After washing an item with a stain, check your wet laundry before drying it to make sure the stain is gone (the heat from the drying process will often make the stain permanent). If the mark is still visible, pretreat as before or try another stain treatment process and wash again.

More: How to Clean Your Jewelry so It Sparkles Even Longer

Types of stains

  • Dye stains: Fresh dye stains are the easiest to remove but very hard to get out once they've set in. If possible, right when the stain happens, run it under cold water and then wash it in the hottest possible setting for the fabric. Dye stains are naturally occurring vegetable dyes found in many plants and acidic foods. If you can't get the stain out yourself, try the dry cleaner. These same cleaning methods should work for coffee, tea and ink stains — which are also dye stains.
  • Protein stains: Organic in nature, protein stains include things like vomit, sweat and blood. Treat them with alkaline stain removal solutions, which will digest the proteins. Enzyme presoak products can break down protein and help dissolve fats. Most detergents contain enzymes and can be used to clean protein stains.
  • Combination stains: Combination stains are stains from things like sauces (barbecue sauce, ketchup, hot sauce), makeup (lipstick, foundation, eye shadow) and crayons. They are a combination of the other types of stains. First, rinse off any excess from the stain with cold water. Gently rub a detergent into the stain. Rinse out the detergent, apply a stain stick and launder.
  • Ice cream and other dairy product stains: Dairy stains are protein stains because they are organic in nature (i.e., from an animal). Fresh stains should be soaked and agitated in cold water before washing. If the stain has dried, scrape or brush off any crusted matter. Soak for up to several hours in cold water with a detergent or an enzyme presoak (which breaks down protein-based stains like egg, grass and blood so your detergent can work more effectively). Launder in warm water. If the stain remains, soak an additional 30 minutes and rewash. If a colored stain remains, launder with a bleach safe for the fabric.
  • Fruit and fruit juice stains: Fruit stains are a dye stain. Launder with detergent in the hottest water safe for the fabric. Do not use soap (bar, flake or detergents containing natural soap) since soap-based products could make the stain permanent. Soak tough stains for 30 minutes in 1 quart of warm water and 1 teaspoon of enzyme presoak product. Removal of old or set stains may require washing with bleach that is safe for that particular fabric. If all the sugars are not removed, a brown stain will appear when the cloth is heated in the dryer or is ironed as the sugar is caramelized. This effect is great for crème brûlée... not so wonderful for your favorite white blouse.
  • Grass stains: Grass stains are also a dye stain — a combination of protein and other organic matter mixed with chlorophyll, xanthophylls and carotenoids. For stubborn stains like grass, soak in a solution of cool water and a laundry product containing enzymes, like Shout Advanced Ultra Gel Brush, for at least 30 minutes (or several hours for aged stains). Don't use hot water, as it will coagulate the protein and make the stain more difficult to remove. If stains remain, soak an additional 30 minutes, then rewash. (Follow product instructions, and note that some laundry detergents already contain enzymes.) After soaking, launder in warm water as usual.
  • Mud stains: Mud stains are a protein stain. Let mud stains dry. Brush to remove the soil. Soak in a solution of 1 quart of warm water, 1 teaspoon of liquid dish detergent and 1 tablespoon of white vinegar for 15 minutes. Rinse with water. Let stand for several minutes. If the stain persists, sponge it with rubbing alcohol, then rinse with clear water and wash. You may also soak the stain for 30 minutes in an enzyme presoak, and you can add chlorine bleach to the load of laundry if the label says it's safe for the fabric.
  • Barbecue sauce stains and other tomato-based sauce stains: Barbecue sauce is a combination stain. Soak in cool water, 1/2 teaspoon of liquid hand dishwashing detergent and 1 tablespoon of vinegar for 30 minutes. Rinse. If the stain remains, pretreat the area with a prewash stain remover, liquid laundry detergent or a paste of powdered detergent and water. Then wash in warm water. Air-dry. If the stain remains, soak it in an enzyme product for at least an hour up to overnight. Some detergents contain enzymes. Launder in warm water. Do not use hot water or hot air-drying or iron the garment until the stain is gone, as heat will set it.
  • Coffee stains: A coffee stain is a dye stain, but the cream or milk in the coffee is a protein. Therefore, you will want to treat the stain as both if you like a little cream in your morning cup of joe. If the stain is fresh, immediately rinse with cold water. If you are at home (or once at home), remove the clothing and add laundry detergent directly to the stain and rub the cloth together with cold water. Soak in the water for 30 minutes, rubbing the cloth together every five to 10 minutes. Next, wash clothing on the hottest setting. Ensure the stain is out of the clothing prior to placing in the dryer. If the stain has not been removed, try repeating the steps. For older stains, apply white vinegar directly to the stain and mix with cold water. Rub stain with a sponge until removed. You may also use baking soda as an alternative solution, applying with a wet cloth to scrub away the stain.

Next Up: Removing stains from whites

Originally published May 2008. Updated August 2017.

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Removing stains from whites

The key to removing stains from white clothing is to attempt to remove the stain immediately. Scoop up or scrape food items off while blotting up liquid spills from the outside in. Apply a liquid dishwashing soap directly to the stain and rub gently with a light-colored cloth or your fingernail. Do not use a darker colored cloth or terry towel as this may darken the stain. Soak garment in cold water for 10 to 15 minutes prior to washing.

More: When to Ditch the Harsh Household Ceaners and Go Au Naturel Instead

New and older stains may also be removed with the use of cornstarch or baking soda, gently scrubbing the powder into the stain with a cold, wet cloth. White vinegar and hydrogen peroxide are also great pre-treatment solutions. With any white clothing, it is recommended that you wash separately and pre-soak in 1/2 cup of bleach and cold water.

Removing stains from darks

Like white clothing, it is important that you attempt to remove a fresh stain immediately. Scoop up any food residue while blotting away liquids. Avoid using bar soaps or terry cloth towels on stains. Soak in 1/2 cup of white vinegar and cold water prior to washing the clothing on a regular cycle. If it is a tough or set stain, soak garment directly in 1/4 cup of vinegar and 1/4 cup of water for 30 minutes prior to washing. Rinse item out prior to washing on a warm cycle to sterilize clothing.

To remove stains from jeans, apply hydrogen peroxide directly onto stain and allow to soak for 30 minutes prior to washing on a regular cycle. Grass stains can be removed by applying petroleum jelly directly to the stain and spreading with your finger. Wash on a regular cycle after five minutes.

Next Up: Removing stains from delicates

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Removing stains from delicates

Remove set and new stains from delicates using a solution of salt and lemon juice. Gently rub with soft cloth (like microfiber) or your finger and rinse with very hot water. Never rub the garment harshly or with a rough cloth. Allow it to dry in the sun. If the stain has not been removed, attempt to soak the item in 2 parts warm water, 1 part detergent and 1 part oxygen bleaching agent. Wash it as recommended per the garment instructions.

More: 11 DIY Natural Cleaners That Actually Get the Job Done

Another method of removing delicate clothing stains is by hand-washing the garment with borax, baking soda and regular detergent. Lightly scrub the cloth together. Rinse with cool water and air-dry to prevent the stain from setting in.

stain removal guide
Image: Rasulovs/iStock/Getty Images Plus; Design: Karen Cox/SheKnows

Jennifer Aniston & Justin Theroux Celebrate Love Amid a Wave of Celeb Splits

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On the same day we learned that our favorite celebrity couples (Chris Pratt and Anna Faris as well as Elon Musk and Amber Heard) called it quits, we were also given a mighty fine silver lining, a reason to hope, if you will. Luckily for us, Jennifer Aniston is the one delivering it.

More: Sarah Hyland Can Sing Like a Bird, but She's Not the Only Actress With Pipes

You may remember how after a highly publicized divorce from Brad Pitt, Aniston finally found long-lasting, true love with actor and comedian Justin Theroux. They got married in 2015, and as far as we can tell, have lived happily ever after since. Well, on the occasion of their wedding anniversary, they are proving to us that love is still hanging in there with a selfie Theroux posted to Instagram showing Aniston kissing him sweetly on the cheek.

Jennifer Aniston and Justin Thoroux prove love lives on

Jennifer Aniston and Justin Thoroux prove love lives on

More: Ross’ Kid on Friends Had a Massive Crush on Jennifer Aniston

And just because we really love these two lovebirds, let's revisit two sweet moments in this pair's history.

There was their wedding, which was a low-key event at home that they kept secret by telling all their friends it was just a birthday party for Theroux. "It's so much more special when it's just your closest friends and family and it's lovely," he told Entertainment Tonight after the news inevitably broke about their wedding. "We wanted it to be a peaceful environment, you don't want it to be hectic."

Then there are the sweet things Theroux has said about finally finding that true love, like this one he told to Rhapsody Magazine: "Marriage makes the small things much smaller and the big things small. You have an ally. It's good to have someone have your back."

More: Friends! The Musical! Is Actually a Terrible Idea

Honestly, is there a pair that is more #CoupleGoals right now than these two? Because I can't find one.

Is Your Partner, Ahem, Lacking When it Comes to Oral? Let Us Lead the Way

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OK, you can probably file this little tidbit of information under "no duh," but apparently there really is such thing as an oral sex gap. Yup, women are twice as likely to go down on their partners and half as likely to receive pleasure when the favor is returned. Kind of messed up, right?

While TV and movies would have us believe that all women are walking around desperate to have someone go down on them, according to a somewhat recent Esquire poll, 10 percent of the women they talked to said they didn't like receiving oral at all. And a whopping 44 percent of women said it could be "nice" every once in awhile. What gives?

We'll tell you what gives. While tons of people like to brag that they are gifted when it comes to pleasuring a woman with oral sex, they probably aren't. And to make matters worse, a lot of us are too embarrassed to call the shots and guide someone when they are down there. Nope, we grin and bear it and most of the time even give the person a pat on the back for their efforts. Awkward.

More: 8 Ways to Bang Out an Orgasm With a Partner Without Actually Having Penetrative Sex

But no more! Use these tips to guide your partner to giving the best oral ever. For the most part, it really is all about finding out what works for you and what doesn't. Print these tips out, hand them to your partner, and then let them get to work.

1. Variety is key

We already know that variety is the spice of life, and this couldn't ring truer than when it comes to oral sex. In other words, always keep her guessing, and she's likely to do you the same favor in return. "Different strokes may work better on different days. If you find something she likes, come back to it repeatedly, with pauses in between," Janet Lieberman, CTO at Dame Products, says, "Much like the trick of making a pool feel warmer by getting out and getting back in, taking a quick break and coming back to it provides a boost in intensity. It also helps you avoid overstimulating a specific cluster of nerves."

2. Say a little prayer

For those feeling nervous about performing oral sex, it may help to send up a prayer — and try the praying position first. Eric Marlowe Garrison, clinical sexologist and bestselling author of Mastering Multiple Position Sex, says of his favorite hands-on oral technique, "Because I believe that perfect practice makes perfect, something I learned from my high school marching band director, it's important that she help him with his technique. One of the ways that I'd recommend this happen is that she places her hands as though she's praying, and she drops them down to where her vulva is. She can do this fully clothed, or she can do this partially clothed, or she can do this naked. With her thumb as the clitoris and the space between the two index fingers as the introitus, she can talk to him about how and where he needs to use his fingers, tongue or toys. She can also ask her partner to put his hands in the same position, and then show him how it can be done."

3. Take things slow

Once you make it to her clit and vagina, gently lick all around. Direct stimulation can be too intense for some, so explore the surrounding area. Ask her where she likes to be touched. You don't have to be rough with your mouth unless she wants you to. It's always best to start off slow, unless she specifically requests otherwise. Some women do like it when you roughly use your tongue and mouth, but only do so if she asks.

Alexandra Fine, CEO at Dame Products, agrees that slow and steady wins the race, "There are lots of tips and tricks on how to do the deed, but where most men fail in cunnilingus is during the arousal phase. Women can take 20 minutes plus to get physically aroused. That means that, however slowly you think you are getting from her mouth to her clit — go slower! Wait until she arches her back and thrusts her hips up — then you'll know you've hit the spot."

Next Up: Try the reverse hug technique

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4. Try the reverse hug technique

This shouldn't be too hard if you're in good shape. You'll need to hold her upside down in front of you. Her head and shoulders should rest on the bed, and her back should rest against your chest and stomach. Hold her up a bit so that she won't feel too much pressure around her neck. Just wrap your arms around her stomach and lower your face between her legs.

If things are stalling, Garrison advises flipping the script to keep communication free and easy. "It is very important to speak in 'I' statements, instead of statements that begin or include the word 'you,'" she says. "With an 'I' statement, we know exactly what the individual wants. 'I love to have my clitoris sucked like a peppermint stick,' as opposed to, 'you don't do it right.' Or, 'you need to suck my clitoris like a peppermint stick.' Those imply judgment, dissatisfaction, or critique of technique."

5. Try the doggy greet technique

This technique involves a combination of oral sex and doggy-style. While in the doggy-style position, pull out of her when she is close to having an orgasm. Then, you hurry and lower your head towards her clit and use your tongue until she has orgasm. Once she has the orgasm, enter her again. Basically, you go back and forth between using your tongue and penis. If done right, she should have multiple orgasms!

More: 6 Positions That Make Anal Sex Easier & Less Intimidating

Since doggy offers a better view than most oral sex positions, embarrassment is a possibility. To maximize enjoyment in more "compromising" positions, sexologist Megan Stubbs recommends relaxing and throwing modesty out the window, "Don't be self-conscious about the way your vulva may look. Vulvas come in all sorts of colors, shapes and sizes, so don't use pornography as your benchmark as what is 'normal.'"

6. Another fun oral position to try is "under the sink"

She stands right next to the side of the bed and squats down a little. There should just be enough room for you to lay on your back on the bed and place your head between her legs. She is mostly in control of her own pleasure. She can squat further, tilt, lean back, etc. This position is pretty easy for you both to do. She just needs to give you enough room so that you don't strain your neck.

And speaking of sink, this woman-on-top position translates perfectly from the bedroom to the bath — try it when taking a shower, as long as you have a firm surface to hold on to. Cunnilingus in the shower has an added advantage, Garrison explains, "Some men have myths about the smell, taste and sensation of going down on a woman. One of the ways to handle this is to engage in oral sex in the shower. So don't throw the possibility of oral sex out with the bathwater."

6 oral sex techniques that deserve some kind of medal
Image: SheKnows

Originally published December 2011. Updated August 2017.

Retro Baby Names Totally Work for a Very Modern Family

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When you're picking a baby name for a boy or a girl, you want something that will stand the test of time. Sure, trendy names are fun, but vintage names are the way to go if you want something that will hold up.

Check out our picks for the best retro baby names for girls and boys from the Bible, old Hollywood and more.

Our list of the top retro boys' names:

Biblical baby names have dominated the charts from the 1800's to modern times.

  1. Hubert
  2. Clayton
  3. Wilson
  4. Harley
  5. Curtis
  6. Cleveland
  7. Cecil
  8. Eli
  9. Wiley
  10. Nicholas
  11. Reuben
  12. Owen
  13. Max
  14. Silas
  15. Fredrick
  16. Sylvester
  17. Marshall
  18. Emmett
  19. Ross
  20. Levi
  21. Otis
  22. Wallace
  23. Russell
  24. Gus
  25. Everett

More: These Twin Baby Boy Names Complement Each Other Perfectly

Here are our top picks for retro baby names for girls:

These retro girl names, straight from the list of top baby girl names from the 1800's, are full of classic, yet surprisingly modern sounding, baby names.

  1. Mary
  2. Elizabeth
  3. Margaret
  4. Ida
  5. Clara
  6. Alicia
  7. Florence
  8. Ethel
  9. Nellie
  10. Mabel
  11. Cora
  12. Helen
  13. Lilian
  14. Gertrude
  15. Rose
  16. Pearl
  17. Edith
  18. Hattie
  19. Mattie
  20. Julia
  21. Maggie
  22. Rosa
  23. Daisy
  24. Nettie
  25. Lizzie

More: These Greek Baby Names Are Perfect for Your Little God or Goddess

Old Hollywood boy names

We can also find great retro baby names by looking at the popular celebrities in the 1930's. Some standouts include:

Girl names:

Baby Names from Literature

Take a look back at classic books and the character names for some wonderful names with a retro feel. Names such as Atticus (To Kill a Mockingbird), Gatsby (The Great Gatsby), Holden (The Catcher in the Rye) and Phineas (A Separate Peace) for boys. For girls, consider Jane (Jane Austen), Ophelia (Shakespeare), Portia (Shakespeare), Lily (The House of Mirth) or Hester (The Scarlett Letter).

You can also take a look back at your own family tree. Not only may these names have a wonderful retro sound to them, but passing on a family name is a wonderful way to stay connected to the past while moving toward the future.

Retro baby names

Originally published December 2015. Updated August 2017.

New Research Finds That Being Lonely Can Literally Kill You

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When Britney Spears sang, "My loneliness is killing me" in "Baby One More Time," she had no idea how right she was.

At the 125th annual convention of the American Psychological Association, one big point was made — we're getting lonelier, and it could be killing us.

Now that the baby boomer generation is reaching old age, and since with old age often comes isolation, we could be seeing an increase in deaths caused by loneliness. Specifically, two meta-analyses of research done on nearly 4 million people found that social isolation, loneliness and living alone are linked with premature death, while having abundant and deep social ties can reduce your risk of premature death by up to 50 percent. Uh, time to finally join a book club, I guess. Making friends as an adult is legit hard, but this research makes it clear that it's something you should try to do.

More: Kate Middleton Admits Parenting Is Lonely, Wins Our Hearts Forever

It makes sense when you think about it. If you don't have a romantic partner who's there to have your back or a social network of people to care for you, it's easier to slip through the cracks if you aren't taking care of yourself or aren't able to care for yourself. And I'm sure all of us who have lived alone have had the same "what if I choke on this pizza roll and tragically perish and the landlord finds me days later dead in my underwear while Friends reruns autoplay on my laptop" thought (not that I would ever eat pizza rolls in my underwear, nuh-uh, not me!). If you live alone and have a medical emergency, you might not be able to call 911 and get help yourself — it's genuinely scary to think about and something that a lot of older people face.

Add to that the fact that families don't tend to stay in one area as much as they used to — only one of my close friends lives in the same town as their parents and just a handful live closer than a two-hour drive — and you can see how prevalent this isolation is becoming. The APA estimates that there are 42.6 million adults in the U.S. over the age of 45 who suffer from chronic loneliness, which is really heartbreaking.

But loneliness isn't just a health hazard to older adults. "Being connected to others socially is widely considered a fundamental human need — crucial to both well-being and survival. Extreme examples show infants in custodial care who lack human contact fail to thrive and often die, and indeed, social isolation or solitary confinement has been used as a form of punishment," says Dr. Julianne Holt-Lunstad, a psychology professor at Brigham Young University. "There is robust evidence that social isolation and loneliness significantly increase risk for premature mortality, and the magnitude of the risk exceeds that of many leading health indicators," like smoking and metabolic syndrome, she said.

More: Is your only child a lonely child?

So what can be done?

If you immediately thought "Golden Girls," you're not far off. Holt-Lunstad says that people should prepare for retirement socially the same way they do financially so you don't lose all of your friends when you stop working. Moving in with your single friends late in life is a perfect way to make sure you still have some close social ties and the sort of mutual care you can get by simply living with someone. No choking on pizza rolls in your underwear, basically.

She also says that doctors should screen for social connectedness just like they do other basic health metrics, and she thinks that community gardens and rec centers that can bring people together should be prioritized in city planning. Additionally, kids should be actively taught social skills in school, which honestly, I 100 percent could have benefitted from. It turns out feeding the trash can wasps Fruit Roll-Ups during recess isn't exactly the greatest way to make friends.

If you're feeling lonely, there are a number of hotlines you can call, like The Friendship Line (for older adults), Crisis Text Line and the Contact Helpline. And if you think you know someone who is suffering from chronic loneliness, don't be afraid to reach out.

In the meantime, after reading about all of this, I think I'm in serious need of some social interaction. Time to start planning my next Game of Thrones viewing party!

Matthew Morrison Is Officially Joining Grey's Anatomy as a Series Regular

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Grey's Anatomy has some pretty big casting news for Season 14.

More: Jesse Williams' Insta Is Making Us So Hungry for Grey's Anatomy

Glee star Matthew Morrison has revealed that he'll be reprising his role from the end of Season 13 as Dr. Paul Stadler by returning as a series regular in the upcoming season. But Morrison is staying tight-lipped about the details, saying only that he has a "big role coming up." What we do know is that there will be drama between Morrison's character and Justin Chambers' character, Alex Karev. They crossed paths briefly at the end of the 13th season, where it was revealed that Dr. Stadler is Jo's abusive estranged husband, and if we know anything about Alex Karev, it's that he fiercely defends the people he loves.

The show's upcoming season will also welcome Timeless star Abigail Spencer as Owen's sister, Megan Hunt. Megan was presumed to be dead, but the end of the Season 13 finale saw Owen anxiously awaiting her arrival to Seattle. She was previously played by Bridget Regan, who was unable to take the recurring role due to her commitment to TNT's Last Ship. She did congratulate Spencer on landing the role, though.

More: Grey's Anatomy's Finale Had a Sad Goodbye — but These Deaths Were Way Worse

Abigail Spencer is joining season 14 of grey's anatomy

Abigail Spencer is joining season 14 of grey's anatomy

"Thanks for all the love guys! @abigailspencer is an incredible actor, tip top lady and will be a BRILLIANT Megan on #GreysAnatomy," she wrote.

More: Grey's Anatomy Season 14 Will Feature a Blast From the Past

Season 14 of Grey's Anatomy premieres with a two-hour episode on Thursday, Sept. 28.

How I Got My Heart Condition & My Sex Life to Coexist

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For the longest time, I was convinced that I would die the way Rose Nylund’s late husband died on The Golden Girls — of heart complications during sex.

I was diagnosed with postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome when I was 16 — a diagnosis that required a tiresome run on the treadmill and the dizzying tilt-table test. POTS means your heart does not get enough blood pumped to it whenever you switch positions from standing to sitting and vice versa.

More: The dangers of stress on your heart health

Besides the body’s inability to regulate its own blood pressure, it also causes patients to have hypovolemia, or a low volume of blood in the body. Everyone experiences the condition differently, and it can be so severe it prevents mobility. While my POTS isn’t as debilitating, I do struggle with horrible balance, near-constant heart palpitations, dizziness, low exercise tolerance and dehydration despite drinking fluids nearly all day long.

As you can imagine, these symptoms make sex kind of tricky.

I first noticed this about a year before my diagnosis when I was masturbating in my room one afternoon. Since I wasn’t used to or familiar with the ways my body and heart were reacting to the cardio I was doing on my back, I didn’t try pacing myself or managing the symptoms. By the time I was near orgasm, my heart was beating so hard, I found myself gasping for breath and completely afraid I was having a heart attack. I didn’t have time to ruminate much on this in the moment, though, because I became increasingly dizzy and eventually passed out when I finished.

When I came to, I struggled to get up because my blood doesn’t get to my heart in time when I move positions. In the aftermath, I was too embarrassed to tell anyone because the episode had happened while I was masturbating, which in and of itself was intimate, and I didn’t want anyone to judge the fact that I was so out of shape that I’d pass out from what I thought was exhaustion after sex.

Even though just a year after that incident I started getting the help I needed to manage my POTS, its impact on my sex life was still felt.

For me, adjusting has meant staying propped up during sex to decrease the dizziness I experience or if I start out having sex with someone lying flat on my back, then I can’t move from that position for at least an hour. Adjusting has also meant finding ways to actually talk about POTS with my partners.

At first, no matter how much the palpitations worsened during sex, I would ignore them out of fear for my lover judging me. I wanted to feel young and sexy, but my body was making me feel geriatric and fragile.

By the time I started dating my current partner, I started getting serious about taking better care of myself, so I told them about my limitations with sex and how my body has special needs to keep it functioning and happy.

More: 9 health issues that can impact sexual satisfaction

Of course, being the amazing person that they are, they didn’t see any reason not to take my POTS seriously, nor did they seem to feel as though it was taking away from our sexual intimacy in any way.

With their support, I started having safer sex. As we made love, I stayed engaged with them while also staying mindful of how my heart was doing. If the palpitations got to be too much, we’d stop as I let myself catch my breath. I even found a way to breathe through my heart palpitations, a breath I can only describe as deep and matching the rhythm of the palpitation. With this method, I was able to have more sex with fewer breaks. And like clockwork, whenever we’ve finished, my partner gets me a tall glass of water to gulp down, knowing exactly what I need to recover from this particular exercise. They lie with me, too, as I slowly adjust to being back in the upright position and help me walk to the bathroom if I have to pee before my body has finished adjusting.

Despite the harmonious way we go about having sex with a heart condition, it still upsets me that I am not in total control of my body. As it stands now, I’m receiving minimal treatment due to insurance limitations, and it scares me. My symptoms can get bad, especially after strenuous sessions of sex, and it triggers my worst fear to take over my mind — me dying of a heart attack in the middle of sex with my fiancé. Realistically, this is not going to happen at the age and health that I am now, but the fear itself sometimes keeps me from sex.

My POTS makes me feel feeble, which doesn’t exactly inspire one to feel sexy and turned on.

More: How to prevent heart illness in your 20s, 30s and 40s

Trusting the process, I decide to get intimate with them anyway, which does make me feel bold and brave. One of the newer coping mechanisms I have with POTS is to also remind myself that avoiding sex altogether will only makes me feel worse, less confident and in a worse mood overall. So if I really did have a heart attack during sex, it would be worth the risk prioritizing living life to the fullest. I won’t let fear run my life.

By Sebastian Zulch

Originally published on HelloFlo

Real Housewives of New York's 11 Most Insane Fights Ever

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Let's be real. All of the Real Housewives casts love a good fight. Orange County slings wine, Atlanta snatches wigs and Beverly Hills breaks bones with dirty words.

But of all the Real Housewives, New York might just take the cake when it comes to brawling. From Scary Island to Ramona "Crazy Eyes" Singer's hijinks throughout the years, it's safe to say the Real Housewives of New York cast is here for our entertainment — and to get scrappy. I mean, Aviva Drescher threw her prosthetic leg in the Season 6 finale, for crying out loud.

And if you think that sounds wild, here are more insane RHONY fights.

11. Dorinda Medley vs. Dorinda Medley

Dorinda stabs herself

Dorinda stabs herself

Yes, my friends, the RHONY's trip to Mexico in Season 9, Episode 17 was an absolute shit show. Lots of tequila was involved (duh), and many tiffs were had. But Dorinda proved that her biggest enemy on the vacay was herself when she stabbed her own hand with a knife.

10. Bethenny Frankel versus Jill Zarin

jill zarin bethenny frankel fight

jill zarin bethenny frankel fight

Back when Jill Zarin was still on RHONY, she had an incredibly tumultuous relationship with Bethenny Frankel. The women started out as best friends, but things went south pretty quickly. One of their first big fights was over the phone. Not only was the argument super-uncomfy and the beginning of the end, but Jill had the nerve to put Bethenny on speaker when she was sitting with LuAnn.

9. LuAnn de Lesseps versus Alex McCord

luann vs alex

luann vs alex

Things came to a head with the countess and Brooklynite Alex McCord after Alex relayed some unpleasant news on Bethenny's behalf to some of the girls. LuAnn wound up hitting below the belt by telling Alex that she "came in with her Herman Munster shoes," to which Alex quipped, "Those are Louis Vuitton." Meow!

More: RHONY's Luann D'Agostino Is Getting Divorced After Just 7 Months

8. Sonja Morgan versus Alex McCord

sonja alex fight

sonja alex fight

Alex's husband, Simon, never mixed well with the girls of RHONY, and when he interfered with a speech Sonja was trying to give at a marriage equality rally, all hell broke loose. Sonja confronted Alex about what Simon did, and yup — she totally lost it.

7. Sonja and Aviva Drescher go at it: St. Barth's, take one

sonja aviva fight

sonja aviva fight

When the girls decided to take a trip to St. Barth's a few years back, of course there was going to be drama. But did anyone think all of it would involve Aviva Drescher? The first fight took place when Sonja confronted Aviva about hanging out with her husband on a "girls' trip."

6. Aviva thinks Ramona can't handle the truth: St. Barth's, take two

aviva you can't handle the truth

aviva you can't handle the truth

Ramona Singer and Sonja Morgan still couldn't get over the fact that Aviva brought her husband on the trip, so Aviva approached the two of them while they were in the middle of a smack-talking fest, and suddenly she turned into Jack Nicholson, telling Ramona that she "can't handle the truth." Huh?

5. Aviva calls Ramona and Sonja white trash: St. Barth's, take three

aviva white trash

aviva white trash

The girls just couldn't get along on the trip at all. Case in point: Aviva's seriously low-blow name-calling.

4. Ramona throws a drink in Kristen Taekman's face

ramona drink throw

ramona drink throw

If there's one thing you don't mess with, it's Ramona's hair. So, when Kristen Taekman splashed Ramona's 'do in the Berkshires, she went as far as launching a glass in her face — and drew blood!

More: Latest RHONY Episode Challenged in a Last-Minute Lawsuit

3. Ramona and Jill's Moroccan brawl

jill ramona fight

jill ramona fight

Ramona and Jill have always had a love-hate relationship, but the only thing happening in Morocco was hate. Things got super-heated with the two during a fight about Bethenny.

2. Aviva throws her prosthetic leg

aviva leg throw

aviva leg throw

No RHONY fan could ever forget when Aviva snapped off her prosthetic leg and tossed it across the room at Le Cirque in a fit of anger. Way to keep it classy.

1. Scary Island: "Go to sleep"

bethenny kelly fight

bethenny kelly fight

The best, most memorable, fight in all of RHONY history has to be when Kelly Bensimon and Bethenny Frankel went at it on Scary Island. In fact, this quite possibly could be the best fight in all of Real Housewives history.

Which fight was craziest to you?

Originally published June 2015. Updated August 2017.


An Eerie Fact About the IT Movie Remake Has the Internet Shook

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Welp, life just got a whole lot scarier. Not just because the remake of Stephen King's classic horror flick IT is inching ever so close to its Sept. 8 release, but also due to a totally unsettling fact about the film that just emerged.

To set this up properly, let's recap. In 1986, King published a bestseller about a malevolent monster clown who lived in the gutter and devoured small children. In 1990, the book made its way onto TV screens as a popular-slash-nightmare-inducing mini-series that '80s and '90s kids inevitably wound up watching. Hence entire generations of now adults who will undoubtedly never hire a clown for their own children's birthday parties.

More: Let's Brush Up on Your IT Trivia Before the New Movie Drops

Of course, the movie gods couldn't just let us have our false sense of security and decided they should mar our safe little clown-free existences by bringing back the one screen villain we never truly got over: Pennywise, aka IT.

If the mere thought of such a remake isn't enough to send a cold, hard shiver down your spine, John Squires — a writer for Bloody Disgusting — just took to Twitter to solidify our sleepless status for the months preceding and following the new IT.

IT 1

IT 1

"In Stephen King's novel, IT awakens every 27 years. IT premiered on TV in 1990. IT is hitting theaters in 2017, 27 years later."

Wait, whaaaaaaa? Either the creative brains over at New Line Cinema are sneaky geniuses when it comes to timing, or King's classic book basically just predicted the re-emergence of its terrifying antagonist. And since no one at New Line has stepped up to take credit, we're betting on the latter.

More: The Definitive List of Stephen King's 50 Novels, By Release Date

Naturally, the internet is fully shook. Fans cannot handle the spookiness of this chronological coincidence, and they're letting it be known on social media.

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IT 2

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IT 4

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IT 5

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IT 7

Yep, it checks out, people. Since King wasn't directly involved with the production of the remake, this wasn't part of his puppetry. It's apparently just downright scare-the-daylights out of you happenstance.

More: Scary movies: Curl Up with These Stephen King Classics

We can practically hear the words of IT now: "Let go. Be afraid. You all taste so much better when you're afraid."

Jennifer Lawrence Is Being Blamed For Chris Pratt & Anna Faris' Split

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Anna Faris and Chris Pratt announced via social media on Monday morning that they are legally separating. And, no big surprise, the internet died a little inside at the thought of such a seemingly happy Hollywood couple calling it quits.

More: Chris Pratt & Anna Faris Are Breaking Up, & We're Emotionally Breaking Down

What you may have missed, though, is the inexplicable way an alarming number of fans responded: by blaming someone who wasn't even in the marriage.

After the initial shock and disbelief that everyone's favorite celeb duo was breaking up dissipated, sadness set in. Laments of "love is cancelled" and "happiness is dead" filled the social-media-sphere. But more people still were angry, and suddenly Lawrence, Pratt's Passengers co-star, was the scapegoat.

"I don't know why, but I blame Jennifer Lawrence for Chris and Anna getting divorced," one Twitter user said. "I can't believe Chris Pratt and Anna Faris are splitting up, this is all Jennifer Lawrence's fault," another complained.

Others predicted it wouldn't be long before Lawrence and Pratt became "a thing," and that the split was obvious because of "the way Chris Pratt looked at Jennifer Lawrence in interviews."

There was even reference to supposedly awkward photos of Faris and Lawrence hugging on the red carpet at the premiere of Passengers in December 2016. (Which, for the record, could just have been two girlfriends having an animated conversation that was taken out of context.) 

More: Anna Faris Is the Live-Tweeting Queen We Don't Deserve but Definitely Need

Clearly, there are a few big issues to contend with here. First, this is the end of a marriage. No matter who you are, that's heartbreaking — without people speculating five seconds after the fact that your partner left you for someone else.

Second, the presumption that Lawrence must be the cause of the split is entirely sexist. Like, what... an attractive young woman can't star in a film alongside a handsome male co-star without seducing him? 'Cause, you know, women are simply sex objects with no impulse control. Weird, since Lawrence's credit in Passengers doesn't read "walking vagina."

Women are the sum of much more than their anatomy and sexuality. And, yet, when a Hollywood marriage crumbles, people always try to find another women to pin the demise on. I mean, c'mon — Gwen Stefani still gets trolled by haters for breaking up Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert, despite the fact that all parties involved have been very clear that was not even remotely the case.

More: Jennifer Aniston & Justin Theroux Celebrate Love Amid a Wave of Celebrity Splits

Since Faris and Pratt have indicated this split is mutual and respectful, there's certainly no reason to jump to the conclusion that Lawrence is somehow involved. Although there was a rumor going around during Passengers filming that an affair was at hand, that rumor was put to rest by all three.

ICYMI, marriage is hard. Raising kids is hard. Long-distance marriage is really hard. A long-distance marriage with two busy working actors who are also trying to raise a four-year-old? That's tough stuff, y'all. No one knows what their marriage looked like behind closed doors, or what work they put into it.

This brings us to the crux of the sexism at hand: if infidelity was SUSPECTED (emphasized, as the rumors are totally unfounded), why wouldn't Pratt be the one to blame for breaking up his marriage? After all, he's the one in it — not Lawrence.

The Voice Just Announced Season 13 Advisors, & It's About to Get Even Twangier

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Fun fact: The Voice can now boast two men on the show who once sported mullets. The hit NBC singing competition has revealed its advisors for the upcoming season, and among the talented mentors is none other than Miley Cyrus' dad, Billy Ray — AKA, the man who took the "business in front, party in back" hairstyle mainstream in the '90s. Move over, Blake Shelton! There's a new mullet in town.

More: Miley Cyrus Wants to Break Away From Her Oversexualized Past

In true Miley form, the crossover star blasted the news on Instagram, gushing, "#TeamMiley!!!!! @billyraycyrus is my Team Advisor!!!! #TeamDad @nbcthevoice."

Miley Cyrus Billy Ray Cyrus

Miley Cyrus Billy Ray Cyrus

She wasn't the only one stoked about who she scored as a mentor for the rapidly approaching thirteenth season of the popular show, either. Also taking to social media was fellow coach Adam Levine, who posted an Instagram video of someone kicking over his "Reserved for Mr. Levine" parking cone.

Adam Levine Joe Jonas

Adam Levine Joe Jonas

The caption? "Watch it, @joejonas, I can tell those are your adorable little feet. Don't you dare park there." Yep, as in Joe Jonas, formerly of Jonas Brothers and now DNCE fame. How can we possibly handle that much adorable dude star power in one space? More pointedly, how can Levine and Shelton's bromance?

More: Blake Shelton's Helping Gwen Stefani With Her Next Album

While Shelton hasn't yet publicly acknowledged the advisor news, he did coincidentally post a throwback photo (well hello, mullet!) on Instagram a week ago with the country superstars who'll be helping him out: Rascal Flatts.

Blake Shelton Rascal Flatts

Blake Shelton Rascal Flatts

Rounding out the judges panel this season is award-winning singer and actress Jennifer Hudson, who has tapped R&B singer Kelly Rowland as her advisor. She hasn't yet responded on social media but, really, who wouldn't be excited about this match-up?

More: Chris Blue Already Has a Plan for Life After The Voice

Now, raise your hand if you can't wait for Season 13 to start. Yeah, us either. Tune in when The Voice returns to TV on Monday, Sept. 25 at 8 p.m. on NBC.

Peter Won The Bachelorette, Not Rachel

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Whelp Bryan won Rachel's heart on The Bachelorette finale. Surprise, surprise.

What she didn't win, decidedly, were the hearts of Bachelor Nation.

More: Rachel Lindsay Is Chomping at the Bit to Get Hitched

She and Peter had this crazy connection and, yet, they broke up. Wh- Wha- Why? Why?!

You're gonna tell me that if Peter hadn't caved and offered Rachel a ring that she still would have picked Bryan? That goodbye kiss between she and Peter spoke volumes.

the bachelorette finale reaction 1

the bachelorette finale reaction 1

And then there was their reunion on the live taping. She was dishing some serious sass to him. I thought he had every right to say he felt attacked. He tried to apologize to her and instead of accepting it, she clapped back about living her best life.

More: Bachelor Nation Turned on Bryan Last Night & These Were the Harshest Tweets

Thankfully, there was Twitter to support us through this tough finale.

the bachelorette finale reaction 8

the bachelorette finale reaction 8

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the bachelorette finale reaction 9

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the bachelorette finale reaction 10

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the bachelorette finale reaction 11

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the bachelorette finale reaction 17

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the bachelorette finale reaction 18

Peter is the actual winner of the finale tonight. Because while Rachel may have gotten her giant, sparkly rock, she let go of a really great man and now has to face the wrath of displeased fans.

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the bachelorette finale reaction 2

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the bachelorette finale reaction 3

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the bachelorette finale reaction 4

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the bachelorette finale reaction 5

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the bachelorette finale reaction 6

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the bachelorette finale reaction 7

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the bachelorette finale reaction 12

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the bachelorette finale reaction 13

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the bachelorette finale reaction 14

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the bachelorete finale reaction 15

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the bachelorette finale reaction 19

the bachelorette finale reaction 20

the bachelorette finale reaction 20

I'm not even sure a stint on Dancing with the Stars can solve this PR problem for Rachel and Bryan.

More: Chris Harrison Is All Smiles (& Beers) in Paradise

Are you Team Rachel and Bryan or do you think this was the worst Bachelorette finale in the history of the show?

I Have to Adopt My Biological Child Just Because I'm a Same-Sex Parent

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My wife and I recently welcomed our beautiful baby boy into the world. We’ve been a couple for eight years, married for four, and the start of our discussions about having a baby to actually giving birth stretched about three years. We planned every step of the way together. I got pregnant and the baby took my wife’s last name. My wife was the first person to hold him when he was born, and she’s often the last person to see his face as she puts him to bed each night. They have a special relationship that even I as the gestational parent don’t have, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Their bond runs deep, and in many ways, I believe that I was a conduit for helping their two souls connect in this life.

More: Please Stop Telling Me My Adopted Kids Should Be My "Second Choice"

Despite all of this, because we are same-sex parents and because we live in New York state in particular, we are forced to undergo an invasive and expensive process to adopt our own child. While it may seem logical that my wife as the nonbiological parent has to file for a second parent adoption to obtain full legal protections for our son, the process she has to embark on is incredibly extreme, and it involves an unnecessary laundry list of costs and privacy violations.

What’s even more shocking is that as the biological parent, I have to undergo an invasive process by the state as well.

Surprisingly, you don’t have to live in Mississippi or Texas, or Zambia or Russia for that matter, nor the other states or countries that are less tolerant of LGBTQ people to encounter discriminatory hurdles to protect your families. New York state, which includes New York City, has draconian laws that force same-sex parents, including the biological parent, to jump through unfathomable hoops just to secure legal rights to the child they’re already raising.

As the biological parent, I still have to undergo a $1,100 social worker home visit, a criminal background check, a child abuse registry check (where I have to remember and turn over the list of my addresses dating back to 1978 or age 18), cough up medical records and taxes and pay a lawyer roughly $5,000. All to maintain the same rights over the child I grew from my egg in my womb and gave birth to.

More: How Your Kid Can Be an LGBTQ Activist

It is incredibly demeaning to sit in your own living room with a complete stranger who may or may not be a parent or may or may not be a better parent than you and to have to answer questions about the intimate details of your life. It is supremely offensive for the state to require this social worker, who you do not know, to comb through your apartment looking for signs that you might be a bad parent when you have actually taken extraordinary steps to bring your child into the world and a herculean leap to secure full legal protection. That in itself should serve as sufficient evidence that we are deserving parents, though it shouldn’t be anyone’s right to make us prove that we intend to be parents to begin with.

In addition to all these hurdles, my wife also has to undergo fingerprinting, secure an employment verification letter and three reference letters confirming she is of good character and more intrusive questions and critiques from a social worker, including about religion, intimate details about her family and childhood and how she plans to address topics of conversation our child is years away from needing to have about his genetic makeup, etc.

A bill called the Child Parent Security Act was introduced into the New York state legislature that would remedy the outdated and ludicrous second-parent adoption laws, but it’s not likely to move soon because legislation typically takes an incredibly long time to pass in New York. It should, though, be a priority, as New York is home to thousands of LGBTQ families who increasingly need to embark on this process to fully protect their families. It’s in the best interest of the state to attract and retain diversity and to streamline the legal process that creates more stable and secure family units.

In contrast to New York’s cumbersome process, California, for instance, requires only the nonbiological parent to print and mail a one-page form and pay upward of $10. (I would venture to say even this is too much.)

More: Just Because I'm a Lesbian Mom Doesn't Mean I Used a Sperm Bank

In an ideal world, all courts and official entities would recognize our marriage and the planning that we did together to bring this child into the world as legal fact. No further evidence should be needed to prove that my wife, who has rearranged her life to prioritize taking care of our son, is the lawful mother.

Game of Thrones Might Bring Back the One Character We've Been Dying to See

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It looks like IMDb might have actually spoiled something huge about Game of Thrones Season 7, and folks, we need to talk about it.

More: Ranking All the Worst Wigs in Game of Thrones History

As it happens, Elle noticed something funny about the credits for the fifth episode of Season 7, "Eastwatch." Among the actors listed for the episode, it appears that actor Joe Dempsie, who played Gendry, is listed. Screen-caps of the goof were quickly captured and posted on Twitter, but shortly thereafter, the "Eastwatch" credits page had been scrubbed of any trace of Dempsie's possible involvement. So, did IMDb accidentally confirm that Gendry will actually return to Game of Thrones and it could be happening very soon?

GoT Gendry Return IMDb

GoT Gendry Return IMDb

Here's the deal: It's very, very possible; this IMDb slip-up only fuels that speculative fire. While the credit error has been fixed (although it's preserved in screen-cap form), if Dempsie does indeed appear in "Eastwatch," it would mean that fans will finally — finally — get to find out what happened to Gendry after he went on the longest rowboat journey in television history.

More: The Internet Is on Fire After Last Night's Game of Thrones Episode

Meanwhile, Nerdist pointed out that Dempsie was reportedly spotted on set while Season 7 was filming and he even appeared at the Season 7 premiere, which is where the rumors of Gendry's return began. Gosh, I hope this is really happening. At any rate, we should temper our expectations, because Elle also made sure to note that Dempsie's credits for Season 7 might be for one episode, which implies he could die or just get sent away again.

More: Sam Claflin Was Almost Jon Snow & 12 Other Stars Almost Cast in GoT

Either way, start crossing your fingers now. We need to know what happened to Gendry ASAP, and hopefully, it happens in "Eastwatch."

Starbucks' New Horchata Beverage Is a Delicious Fall Preview

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While we transition from summer into fall, there are certain traditional mainstays we can always look forward to, among them being pumpkin-spice everything. But is there perhaps a new seasonal flavor that will change everything?

Insta Horchata

Insta Horchata

Starbucks has launched a new horchata-inspired Frappuccino, and it’s pretty epic. The Horchata Almond Milk Frappuccino is a blend of almond milk, cinnamon dolce syrup, coffee and ice. The drink is then topped with whipped cream, a caramel swirl and cinnamon-sugar sprinkles. It’s the perfect fall-to-summer transition drink, yeah? The icy-cold Frappuccino is the perfect temp for summer, and yet the flavors of cinnamon and caramel absolutely tease the coziness of fall. .

More: 10 Low-Calorie Starbucks Drinks Perfect for Summer Sipping

The internet is pretty excited too.

tweet horchata

tweet horchata

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tweet horchata 2

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tweet horchata 3

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tweet horchata 4

While the horchata we are familiar with is traditionally rice-based and served with vanilla and cinnamon, this is clearly an inspired recreation we’re excited to try.

The horchata-style Frappuccino debuts at Starbucks stores in the United States and Canada on Aug. 8  — that’s today! So get involved.

More: Starbucks Mobile Order & Pay Means No More Waiting in Line for Your Latte


This Checklist Will Help You Get That Long Overdue Promotion

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You’re feeling pretty bored at work these days. Maybe it’s because you’ve held the same position for several years and are beyond an expert by now, or perhaps you were hired into your company at a level that’s technically beneath your skills. You know you can handle more, and you’re ready for work to feel a bit more challenging. What you’re ready for, you realize, is a promotion.

But actually getting a promotion, similar to asking for a raise, seems easier said than done, right? Aren’t promotions things that just happen spontaneously (to some people *cough, cough* more than others) rather than something you flat-out ask for? Not quite — if you feel certain that you’re deserving of and prepared for a promotion, there are, indeed, a few things you can do to nudge the Big Boss along and negotiate a position boost. Here’s what you should try.

Determine the best time to approach this topic with your boss

Obviously, some times are going to be better than others to effectively communicate why you deserve a promotion. One particularly logical opportunity for you to do so is during your annual performance review, but also make sure that you’re factoring in for current happenings at your company and even (on a slightly lesser level) in your boss’s life.

Map out exactly what you’re going to say

This conversation is too crucial to leave to chance. As anyone remotely versed in communication skills would tell you, you need to study up and have a pretty solid framework for your argument mapped out well in advance. Your pitch should include your major accomplishments and what value you’ve added to the company in highly specific terms. Why were they smart to hire you, and how have you exceeded their expectations?

More: Don't Try Changing Careers Without This Checklist

Be prepared in case numbers come up

If you’re successful in getting a promotion, chances are that will mean a boost in pay too. You should not discuss the potential for a raise until you’ve actually been offered the promotion. All the same, if your boss does bring the subject up during your conversation, you don’t want to appear unknowledgeable or uncertain. Do your research, and know in advance how much you’d expect to receive in this new role.

Ask for a recommendation

Is a higher-up vacating a role you think you’d be the perfect fit for? Depending on your relationship with this person, you could express your interest to them and ask if they would be your reference in recommending you as a replacement.

Get the meeting scheduled

If you’re timing your promotion request to coincide with your annual performance review, this step won’t be necessary. Otherwise, you should send your boss an email requesting a meeting. Make it clear that this meeting has to do with discussing your performance and role within the company; you don’t want your boss to be caught totally off-guard.

More: Employment Verification Letters: Everything You Need to Know, Plus a Template

Now — execute!

The meeting has arrived. It’s time to blow your boss away with your preparedness. Be confident, be direct, and don’t be a waste of their time.

Follow up

It’s been over a week since your boss said they’d consider your request, and you’re not sure what to do. At this point, you should try following up with them. Send them a short professional email asking if they’ve had the opportunity to give more thought to the conversation you had on X day.

If the answer is no — get feedback on how you can improve

How can you become more qualified so the next time you ask, the answer is a definite yes? Ask for their feedback — perhaps you should take some online classes or even consider getting your MBA. Maybe you’ll be told that the company is simply restructuring, for instance, and unable to promote you at this time. It’s all still helpful to know.

More: Cover Letter Closing Paragraphs That Will Get You Hired

And/or, ask yourself if it’s time to leave

At this point, you may be wondering, “Should I quit my job?” If you’ve truly given the role your all for a good chunk of time and find that your efforts are going unrecognized, then maybe. But don’t throw in the towel just because you were told no once — if you’re rash in handing in your two-week notice, you’re unlikely to rise in the ranks anywhere.

Regardless of the outcome, the most important thing is that you took the initiative to ask for what you wanted. That’s something women especially often have a hard time doing. But if you don’t ask, you’re a whole lot less likely to receive.

Originally published on Fairygodboss.

11 Facts About the Tragic 1996 Everest Climb Not in the 2015 Movie

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There's no doubt about it. 2015's Everest is an amazing piece of work. The film brings to life the emotions and action surrounding the real-life tragic events in 1996 and provides a grueling and heartbreaking look into the Mount Everest climb that claimed the lives of eight mountaineers over 20 years ago. The movie is pretty realistic — and at times hard to watch — but it didn't even capture all the details of the event.

After watching the movie, we — like so many other people who were intrigued and saddened by the Everest disaster — were curious about what else went down on that fateful trip that is still considered the worst loss of life ever to occur on a mountain on a single day.

We found 11 true events that didn't make it into the movie.

Everest
Image: Universal Pictures

1. Rob Hall climbed Everest a whopping five times

Rob Hall (Jason Clarke) actually summited Everest five times before he died on the mountain in 1996, more than any other climber (at that time) who wasn't a Nepalese Sherpa. Hall's body remains on the mountain to this day.

2. Jan Arnold, Rob Hall's wife, was supposed to be on the '96 climb

Rob Hall and his wife, Jan Arnold (Keira Knightley), climbed Everest together in 1993. She would have gone again in 1996 but instead stayed at home in New Zealand because she was pregnant. Two months after Hall tragically died, she gave birth to their daughter, Sarah.

MoreRob Hall's Wife Jan Arnold Reveals Her Feelings About the Film

3. Body nicknamed "Green Boots"

Green Boots
Image: via Twitter

The above body is commonly referred to as "Green Boots" and also serves as a trail marker. This corpse is believed to be that of Tsewang Paljor, who was a member of the first team of Indians to summit Everest from the northeastern passageway. He was one of the eight who died on May 10, 1996.

4. More than 250 bodies on Everest

Because conditions are so dangerous, and there is so little oxygen near the top of the mountain, if someone dies while climbing Everest, there is no safe way to bring the body down. Most deaths are due to an avalanche or falling off the mountain.

5. Beck Weathers' eye surgery

Beck Weathers
Image: Universal Pictures

In the film, climber Beck Weathers (Josh Brolin) begins to get blurred vision and can only see a couple of feet in front of him. His vision problems in real life were because of overexposure to ultraviolet radiation on his eyes that had recently undergone radial keratotomy surgery to correct his myopia or nearsightedness.

Next Up: Beck Weathers lost more than just his nose

Originally published Sept. 2015. Updated August 2017.

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6. Beck Weathers lost more than just his nose

After being exposed in the harsh and freezing blizzard, Weathers suffered terrible frostbite. He lost the bottom half of his right arm and all of the fingers on his left hand. He also lost parts of both his feet. His nose had to be amputated but was later reconstructed from tissue from his ear and forehead.

7. Author Jon Krakauer wishes he'd never climbed Everest

Everest
Image: Universal Pictures

In the film, Jon Krakauer (Michael Kelly) is a journalist invited to climb Everest so he can write an article for Outside magazine. In a recent interview, Krakauer said this to The Huffington Post, "Climbing Mount Everest was the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life. I wish I'd never gone. I suffered for years of PTSD, and still suffer from what happened. I'm glad I wrote a book about it. But, you know, if I could go back and relive my life, I would never have climbed Everest."

8. Rob Hall's body found by Imax expedition

Less than two weeks after the deaths of the eight explorers on Everest, a team of filmmakers from Imax discovered Rob Hall's body on their way to the summit. They were there to shoot the 1998 documentary, also called Everest.

More: Rob Hall's Daughter, Sarah, Speaks Out About Her Father

9. Beck Weathers not the first helicopter rescue that day

Everest climbers
Image: Universal Pictures

Because of the lack of oxygen, helicopters cannot fly safely up to the top of Everest. The situation was so desperate, however, Nepalese Lt. Col. Madan Khatri Chhetri took the risk and managed to evacuate a climber named Makulu Gau ahead of Weathers. The helicopter was able to take only one passenger at a time and successfully returned to rescue Weathers.

10. Home of a goddess

Buddhists believe the Goddess of Inexhaustible Giving, Miyolangsangma, lives at the top of Mount Everest. Some climbers pray to her for a safe trip up and down the mountain.

11. 2014 Avalanche during shooting preparation

On April 18, 2014, an avalanche killed 16 people on Everest, twice as many as the 1996 disaster that took eight lives. The filming of Everest had to be put on hold until conditions were safe.

Everest

Everest

Ellen DeGeneres Launches New Baby Lifestyle Collection

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Talk show host, Oscars host, actor and all-around awesome human being Ellen DeGeneres is branching out — and we're pretty excited.

More: Retro Baby Names Work for Modern Families

Let's add "designer" to her impressive résumé. DeGeneres announced the debut of her ED by Ellen DeGeneres baby lifestyle collection in a press release. The collection features some seriously adorable designs for a wide array of products such as furniture, bedding, diaper bags and — our fave — super-swag apparel and footwear. Behold the cuteness from her Instagram feed:

Ellen line 2

Ellen line 2

Thanks, Ellen. Now those of us who have teenagers have to go and get knocked up again so we can have cute little DeGeneres-ish babies and nurseries. Damn it!

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Yeah, we're not surprised one bit that we love the line — what's not to love? DeGeneres' collection is infused with her usual joie de vivre, and we adore her approach to designing for babies. "Babies love to be swaddled and should always be surrounded by love and kindness. I created my baby collection with that thought in mind," DeGeneres said in the press release. "Each piece has a message of love and the line is filled with whimsical and fun pieces. I don't have a baby but I love to be swaddled and you will too!"

The launch collection is available now nationwide at BuyBuy Baby stores exclusively, as well as online at buybuybaby.com if you're an online kinda shopper like most of us.

More: Christina Perri Is Going to Be a Mom

The press release reads, "Love and positive messaging is a signature element that Ellen brings to her ED brand; featured sayings include, Love, Be Kind, Joy, Made with Love, I Can and I Will."

Ellen line

Ellen line

We're feeling the love for sure in the doodle dogs, the bright animal patterns and the dancing bunnies. DeGeneres and wife Portia de Rossi didn't just whip up these products in their garage, of course — DeGeneres partnered with baby industry powerhouses such as Aden by Aden + Anais (swaddles, blankets, bibs), Bivona & Co. (baby furniture), Naturepedic (mattresses) and the Camuto Group (footwear). Other partners include Peg Perego, SABG, Crown Crafts and WeePlay according to the release.

This is the baby division of ED, DeGeneres' lifestyle brand (don't be jealous; you can have a lifestyle brand too if you want). The brand was launched in 2015 as a joint deal with DeGeneres and the CEO of Burch Creative Capital, Christopher Burch. We're grooving on DeGeneres' commitment to accessibility (read: no insane price tags) and her usual positivity.

Now where's our grownup-size dancing bunny sheets, please?

Our 10 Favorite Carpool Karaoke Moments

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Apple Music is airing its first-ever television show tomorrow with the premiere of Carpool Karaoke: The Series, a spinoff of the popular Carpool Karaoke segment on The Late Late Show With James Corden. The 16-episode first season will pair celebrities together as they drive about town and will include John Cena, John Legend, Alicia Keys, Jessica Alba, Ariana Grande, Jeff Gordon, Gwyneth Paltrow, Metallica, Shaq, Miley Cyrus, Will Smith, Chelsea Handler, Maisie Williams and Sophie Turner.

How are we planning on getting excited for the new show? Let's start with a walk down memory lane and our favorite moments from Carpool Karaoke over the last three years. Buckle your seat belts and ready your singing voice.

More: Bruno Mars & James Corden's Carpool Karaoke Is Making Twitter Freak Out

Sia and James in matching wigs

sia carpool karaoke

sia carpool karaoke

Sia may not like to show her face, but she sure does like commuting. Not only does Sia hit all of the amazing high notes in "Chandelier," James also dons a matching wig. Other highlights include Corden talking to Sia about her belief in aliens and asking for a few voice lessons. Spoiler alert: Sia believes in aliens, but she's never seen one herself. Maybe because her bangs are in the way?

Sir Elton John sings, with costumes, plus amazing harmonies

elton john carpool karaoke

elton john carpool karaoke

On a terrible rainy day, Corden picks up the utterly delightful Sir Elton John to help him get to work. They sing everything from "Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me" to "Crocodile Rock" to "Tiny Dancer." The pair put on boas and fun glasses while John explains why he was so drawn to costumes in the '70s and '80s (he couldn't dance and he wasn't a heartthrob). But the best part might be when the Lion King hit "Circle of Life" comes on and both start belting it out (with Corden wearing a mane).

Justin Bieber solves a Rubik's Cube and sings his early hits

justin bieber carpool karaoke

justin bieber carpool karaoke

Even the biggest Bieber haters might be won over by this 10-minute ride, in which Corden and the pop sensation return to some of Bieber's earliest hits (and change clothes). We prefer this one over Bieber's second visit to the show for an obvious reason: at one point, Bieber solves a Rubik's Cube in the passenger seat while Corden looks on in total, complete amazement.

Gwen Stefani, George Clooney and Julia Roberts sing Queen

Gwen Stefani carpool karaoke

Gwen Stefani carpool karaoke

This reminds us of a dream we once had in which James Corden, Gwen Stefani, George Clooney and Julia Roberts are all smooshed into a car together, singing "We Are the Champions." Wait, no, that was real life. And that's not even the only great part of the segment. Stefani also stops to teach Corden the super-fast lyrics in "The Sweet Escape" and explains her love of emojis.

Stephen Curry sings Disney tunes like all of us everywhere

Stephen Curry carpool karaoke

Stephen Curry carpool karaoke

Not all of the best carpool karaoke moments have amazing professional singers. In fact, one of the most-loved episodes is with Golden State Warriors point guard Stephen Curry, who is one of the best shooters in the sport. Curry also proves he is deeply likable as the pair drive around Los Angeles. Curry admits that what he listens to in the car is whatever his 4.5-year-old wants, and soon Curry and Corden are wailing the lyrics to Moana and Frozen songs.

More: Michelle Obama Singing "Single Ladies" Is the Best Thing We've Seen All Day

Lady Gaga belts it out

lady gaga carpool karaoke

lady gaga carpool karaoke

Perhaps the most wonderful thing about Carpool Karaoke is seeing the biggest stars sing in a regular old car, without any help, any lip syncing, and only a late-night host as backup vocals. Some of the talent is better than others, and Lady Gaga brought it. Whether singing her newest hits from Joanne or her biggest hits of yesteryear, Gaga's raw talent is on display. We also love Corden recreating some of her classic looks.

A car packed full of Broadway stars, with Lin-Manuel Miranda in the passenger seat

broadway carpool karaoke

broadway carpool karaoke

We are here for this. This episode begins with Hamilton creator and genius Lin-Manuel Miranda and Corden singing from Miranda's Broadway hit. Then the fun really starts when Audra McDonald, Jesse Tyler Ferguson and Jane Krakowski slide into the back seat and transform the car into a talent boat. The finale is a wonderful rendition of "One Day More" in which we can see Ferguson's tonsils. We could watch it over and over again.

Katy Perry reveals who "I Kissed a Girl" is about, and yep, she can sing

Katy Perry Carpool Karaoke

Katy Perry Carpool Karaoke

On one of the most recent episodes, Katy Perry and her new short haircut jumped into Corden's car and Perry was ready to sing all of her greatest hits, including her new single, "Bon Appetit." She jokes that her new pixie cut was inspired by the late-night host and tells the story of who "I Kissed a Girl" is really about (and no, it's not really Scarlett Johansson).

Stevie Wonder takes the wheel — and shows off his pipes

Stevie Wonder Carpool Karaoke

Stevie Wonder Carpool Karaoke

Listening to Stevie Wonder sing live is cool enough, but it turns into a top 10 Carpool Karaoke moment when Corden calls his wife on the phone and Stevie serenades her until Corden is moved near tears. Bonus points for the gag where Wonder gets into the driver's seat.

Adele sings Niki Minaj's "Monster"

adele carpool karaoke

adele carpool karaoke

Adele. Adele! Adele singing! We all knew Adele is amazing and can sing better than basically anyone on earth, but we didn't quite know how amazing she was or how well she could sing in a car. This is our favorite Carpool Karaoke moment for so many reasons, but mainly because she and Corden get along so well and because she is just absolutely magnetic. Her rapping game, which is on display as she sings Niki Minaj's "Monster," is more than impressive. Also: the harmonizing during "Hello" reminds us that Corden is not a half-bad singer at all.

More: 7 Times Adele Was All of Us During James Corden's Carpool Karaoke (VIDEO)

Did we miss your favorite Carpool Karaoke moment? Please, tell the world in the comments.

Anna Faris Subtly Hinted at Marital Problems One Week Ago

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Were there clues that there was trouble for Chris Pratt and Anna Faris? Could we have seen their devastating split coming?

More: Jennifer Lawrence Is Being Blamed for Chris Pratt & Anna Faris' Split

Some people think so.

Just a week before they made their joint announcement about their legal separation, Faris liked a tweet written by writer Kelly Oxford about divorce.

"So far the hardest part of divorce is not having anyone to yell with when the printer isn't working," Oxford wrote. The tweet showed up in Faris' liked tweets on her Twitter profile.

Anna Faris likes tweet about divorce 1 week before spli

Anna Faris likes tweet about divorce 1 week before spli

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Of course, hindsight is 20/20, as there were other clues. In recent interviews, both Faris and Pratt talked about how difficult it can be to maintain a relationship under the scrutiny of fame. Still, though, even if someone had told us there was trouble in paradise, we're not sure we would have believed it unless it came straight from the source.

Now we just have to try to remember the good times that made us fall in love with them as a Hollywood power couple. Faris' new memoir, Unqualifiedmay help us do that; although in light of the news of their split, the book's future is a little bit uncertain. Written by Faris with a foreword written by Pratt, it was being shopped to publishers before they announced their separation. According to People, we know that it's a powerful reflection on marriage and the ways it can evolve, grow or end. Additionally, in an excerpt from Pratt's foreword, this description of Faris is reportedly still present: "She is fierce and very loyal, she rarely punishes people. But when she does, it’s powerful and terrifying, and when it’s over, it’s really over. (Power and terror are acceptable in a partner but absolutely necessary in a mother, as far as I’m concerned). And she does mother very well, both our son, Jack, and me, when needed."

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Whatever happens with the book, we know we'll be reading it as soon as we can. Leave it to Pratt and Faris to remind us, even in the midst of their breakup, that true love is real.

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