Quantcast
Channel: What's New
Viewing all 33701 articles
Browse latest View live

Meet the Future of Egg Freezing

0
0

When it comes to getting pregnant, there are a lot of variables to consider, including your age, health and the fertility of your partner. When you’re dealing with any sort of assisted reproductive technology — basically, anything involving a lab — there are more opportunities for environmental factors like the temperature and air quality to interfere.

For example, when a woman freezes her eggs, the eggs may not survive the thawing process to even make it to IVF — a significant but little-discussed fertility challenge.

But a revolutionary state-of-the-art egg-freezing lab in New York City is looking to remove those variables from the process, even going so far as to guarantee 12 frozen viable eggs with a 100 percent survival rate. Let’s look at how this is possible.

100 percent survival rate

Extend Fertility first made the news last year when they opened the first clinic in the United States dedicated exclusively to egg freezing. Unlike most clinics, Extend Fertility doesn’t offer services like IVF or sperm motility screenings — they only work with women looking to freeze eggs, from first consultations to retrieval to arranging long-term storage in a natural disaster-proof facility.

Because the clinic only deals in services related to egg freezing, it is able to provide highly personalized and specialized care for each patient. Now, Extend Fertility is taking their single-purpose clinic one step further, becoming the first clinic on the East Coast to offer the Cryotec freezing method — and a near 100 percent post-thaw survival rate according to Embryology Laboratory Assistant Director Dr. Leslie Ramirez.

To clarify, the egg survival rate refers to the percentage of eggs that are considered viable after they have been frozen and thawed. It does not in any way guarantee that they will result in successfully fertilized embryos that, when implanted via IVF, result in guaranteed babies.

two embryologists
Image: Extend Fertility

More: Freezing Your Eggs Isn't as Easy Peasy as They Make It Seem

Developed by Dr. Masashige Kuwayama in Japan, the Cryotec method is considered the most advanced egg-freezing technique currently in practice, limiting potential damage to the eggs during every step of the process. Each tool and technique is specifically designed to ensure that any chances for error are minimized.

How is this different from other egg-freezing methods?

Since egg freezing started in 1986, what is known as a “slow-freeze” technique was widely used for the first 25 years. This is exactly what it sounds like: a process that takes a few hours to get the egg cell down to the final storing temperature of minus 196 degrees C (around minus 320 degrees F).

Vitrification, on the other hand, is essentially flash-freezing, meaning that it cools the cell down to minus 196 degrees C within a few minutes. The Cryotec method used at Extend Fertility is a specific type of vitrification in which, in addition to speed, other variables like the air quality and temperature in the lab are controlled.

It turns out that speed makes all the difference in terms of quality of frozen eggs. The slow-freeze method provides time for ice crystals to form in the cell, which may cause damage to its structures and reduce the chance that it will be viable after it’s thawed. Unlike other biological materials like sperm, egg cells have a much higher water content and because of that are more likely to develop harmful ice crystals.

close up on egg incubator
Image: Extend Fertility

More: Egg Freezing Is Not the Answer When It Comes to Equality at Work

So how much of a difference does the process make? A lot, actually. One study by the Center for Reproductive Medicine found that eggs frozen via vitrification methods had a 91 percent survival rate, compared to a 61 percent survival rate of eggs stored using slow freezing. The Cryotec method bumps the survival rate up to 100 percent by controlling all environmental factors and utilizing specifically designed tools. Despite the existence of more successful methods, some embryologists still use slow-freezing methods today.

It’s all about the environment

Beyond adopting the flash-freezing technique, the lab at Extend Fertility also takes several precautions to create the safest possible environment for the eggs — many of which are unique to their facility. This includes an air-isolating system, which keeps the number of air particles per cubic foot below 1,000 (compared to a typical office building, which contains anywhere from 500,000 to 1 million particles per cubic foot of air).

There are also temperature controls throughout the lab, making sure that any air or surface the eggs come into contact with are warmed to body temperature (37 degrees C). Even the layout of the lab was designed to minimize distances egg cells travel within the room, decreasing any possible chances of accident or error.

egg freezing
Image: Extend Fertility

A goal-oriented pricing model

One cycle of egg freezing — meaning the process involving stimulating ovaries and retrieving the eggs — typically costs around $10,000. There’s no way to guarantee the number of eggs that will be available and retrieved during each cycle, so it may take multiple attempts to get a patient's total desired number of eggs.

A goal-oriented pricing model, like the one adopted at Extend Fertility, takes a different approach. For around half the price — $4,490 to be specific — the clinic guarantees at least 12 viable frozen eggs, which they will retrieve through up to four cycles. One cycle takes around two weeks, and involves eight to 11 days of hormone injections followed by an in-office retrieval process, which takes between 10 and 15 minutes and is performed under local anesthesia.

Later on the day of retrieval, a clinician will call the woman to let her know how many eggs they were able to get. Then, the following day, they will let her know how many of those eggs are of high enough quality to be frozen. The number of viable eggs per cycle differs woman to woman, which is why the clinic offers up to four cycles to retrieve 12 quality eggs.

Frozen eggs on a monitor
Image: Extend Fertility

More: UK Demand for Egg Freezing Rises 400 Percent in One Year

Why 12 eggs? The thought behind this is that it’s the equivalent of one year’s worth of fertility, and is optimal for women over 30 who are trying to conceive.

So what’s the catch? The seemingly low $4,490 price point does not include the cost of medications required for ovarian stimulation (that will add on between $2,000 and 4,000) or long-term storage ($450 per year). But a typical egg-freezing cycle also doesn’t include medication or storage costs, so it still comes in less than traditional fertility clinics.

The future of freezing

While the Cryotec technique is currently only available at a handful of clinics in the United States (Extend Fertility is Dr. Kuwayama's east coast representative), it does represent what is likely to be the future of egg freezing. So even if you don’t live in New York, this is a method that should become more widely available as other clinics adopt the technique.

Egg freezer
Image: Extend Fertility

The freezing process itself is only one component of fertility preservation. This article is the first in a series taking a closer look at all things related to egg freezing, including state-of-the-art technology and research, women’s firsthand experiences and advice from doctors and fertility specialists.

If there are any topics related to egg freezing you would like to see covered, please contact us at health@sheknows.com.


The Best Part of Yeezy Season 5 Was Model Halima Aden, Not the Clothes

0
0

There's someone at the Yeezy Season 5 show at the 2017 New York Fashion Week that's making waves and no, it's not Kanye West.

More: Kris Jenner Discusses Kanye West's Fashion Line and Inconvenient Requests

Rather, it's one of West's models, Halima Aden. Aden walked in the Yeezy Season 5 and she turned heads for more than one good reason. Aden is the first hijab-wearing model for Yeezy. She is breaking barriers and stigmas like a flippin' whiz kid and she is only 19-years-old. Can you believe this? But the Yeezy accomplishment is just one of the many amazing things this young woman, activist, model, and possible future leader of the free world should be known for. Aden is an intriguing woman indeed.

Halima Aden Tweet

Halima Aden Tweet

More: We're Still Thinking About the Disaster That was Kanye's NYFW Show

1. She was born in a refugee camp.

Halima Insta Selfie LA

Halima Insta Selfie LA

In a recent profile for Vogue, we learned that Aden was born in a Kenya refugee camp. Additionally, Aden is a first generation Somali-American and is currently a freshman at St. Cloud University in Minnesota. Between being a (presumably) ace college student and modeling, I'd say Aden is killing the game right now.

2. She competed to become Ms. Minnesota

Halima Ms. Minnesota Tweet

Halima Ms. Minnesota Tweet

Oh yeah, did I mention that she is also a former beauty pageant contestant? Aden made headlines for becoming the first hijab-wearing woman  — Are you sensing a trend? — to compete for Ms. Minnesota in 2016. Aden competed against 45 other women and, while she did not win, she did break down some barriers. Most important of these was giving a voice to Muslim women's beauty and how it can present itself in the beauty pageant circuit.

3. She is politically active and aware

Halima Insta Selfie Duo

Halima Insta Selfie Duo

Aden is no slouch or glassy-eyed Millenial when it comes to voicing her opinions. On her Instagram, Aden has posted a few photos in support of various issues: her support for Syrian refugees, her support for #NoDAPL and the promotion of International Day of Peace. I think it could be fair to say that Aden's rising star in the modeling industry will afford her a platform to speak up for the causes she believes in; I'm certainly interested in hearing more from her.

4. She recently signed with IMG Models & she made history doing so

Meet Halima Aden Tweet

Meet Halima Aden Tweet

Consider this another major barrier broken: Aden became the first hijab-wearing woman to be signed with IMG Models. With any luck, we'll be able to say Aden got the ball rolling when it came to seeing more hijab-wearing Muslim women getting signed to modeling agencies.

5. She wears braces

Halima Insta With Mom

Halima Insta With Mom

Let's pause for a moment of sweetness: Aden wears braces! But obviously she not letting that stop her from smiling (which is what happened to me when I wore braces) and instead shows them off. They're part of what makes her beautiful and what helps reshape what society perceives as beautiful, too.

6. Her hijab is a part of her, but it doesn't define her

Halima Insta Selfie Hijab

Halima Insta Selfie Hijab

At this point, you've probably sensed that there's a trend for Aden's newfound fame, and it's that her hijab has become a factor in her fame. Let's correct that matter: She may be the first woman to get signed to IMG Models or walk in a Yeezy fashion show who also wears a hijab, but that is not the only reason to take note. She is using her position and circumstances to create conversations and pave the way for other women. Iconic.

7. She wants to change society's perceptions of Muslim women

Halima Insta Friend Flower Filter

Halima Insta Friend Flower Filter

Aden bringing awareness to the belief that Muslim women are just as beautiful and worthy or praise as women in other religious communities and communities of color. She is managing to do this through her ascent to the top in the modeling world. In the aforementioned Vogue profile, Aden stated that, "My goal is to send a message to Muslim women and young women everywhere that it’s okay to break stereotypes and be yourself. Always stay true to who you are — barriers can and will be broken!" Yes, queen.

More: Acid-Attack Survivor Reshma Qureshi Just Walked in NYFW

But the most important thing to know? She's beautiful, inside and out. I mean, can you even? Because I can't.

10 Cat Breeds That Have the Absolute Best Personalities

0
0

Cats have a reputation for being aloof, independent and unaffectionate — but that image is totally unfair and not true. There are cat breeds that have amazing personalities and aren't little jerks like the general population would have you believe.

Whether you're looking for a feline companion that is chatty and needs a lot of attention or prefer one that is a little mellower, there are so many cat breeds to choose from that will suit your personal taste and style. No matter what your personality type may be — there's a cat for that.

1. The oriental

Oriental cat
Image: Mike Lavoie/Flickr

Related to the Siamese, this cat has big pointed ears and an inquisitive personality. The oriental cat is smart and social and will bond deeply with its owners. The cat can be a loyal and playful companion. Its sleek body is more muscular than it would appear. It can be quite vocal and demanding — a very "dog-like" cat. In fact, these cats play well with other pets and are kid-friendly.

With an average adult weight of 5 to 8 pounds, the oriental has an average lifespan of about 15 years, though it can be plagued by dental problems and is prone to a hereditary disease of the liver and kidneys called amyloidosis.

2. The American shorthair

American shorthair
Image: 白士 李/Flickr

This athletic cat is descended from the British shorthair, but is larger, leaner and more powerful than its across-the-pond counterpart. It comes in a wide range of colors and patterns and is also a very long-lived kitty, with a lifespan of 15 to 20 years not being out of the ordinary. The American shorthair is great with kids and even gets along well with dogs, too. The American shorthair is healthy, gentle, easy going and low maintenance — grooming is not an issue with this breed, which weighs in at an average of 8 to 15 pounds, with males being significantly larger.

More: 10 Unique Pets You'll Love Just as Much as a Cat or Dog

3. The Birman

Birman cat
Image: Richard White/Flickr

This beautiful cat is thought to have originated from Burma. Legend has it the Birman cat was the protector of the Burmese temples. It's a large, long, sturdy cat with long silky hair (which isn't as thick as a Persian's) that does not mat. This cat is known for its blue eyes; dark points on its ears, face, legs and tail; and snow-white boots on all four paws. This is a loving, gentle cat that loves to play, but can stay quiet and out of the way when you're busy, which makes it the perfect kitty for families with children or other animals. The average Birman weighs about 8 to 12 pounds.

Next Up: The sphynx

Updated by Sarah Long on 2/17/17

{pageBreak}

4. The sphynx

Sphinx cat
Image: Shannon Badiee/Flickr

We're not talking about the legendary Egyptian monument or myth, but an exotic cat breed. The hairless sphynx isn't completely hairless — it actually has a fine peach-like fuzz over its body, which makes it very sensitive to the sun and elements. This sensitivity is also the reason the sphynx should only be considered an indoor cat. It is warm to the touch, cuddly, energetic and affectionate. The sphynx will even snuggle under the covers with you. With its big pointy ears and curious nature, the sphynx is a fun addition to any family, whether you have kids or even other pets.

The sphynx weighs between 8 and 15 pounds, but weight gain can be a serious problem if it's not monitored.

5. The ragdoll

Ragdoll cat
Image: Visa Kopu/Flickr

Thus named by a breeder in the early '60s because the cat was very relaxed and floppy when picked up, the ragdoll is a gentle and affectionate cat, often following its owners from room to room like a puppy. This kitty is not good at defending itself and shouldn't be allowed to roam the streets alone. In fact, it is careful not to use teeth and claws during play, which makes it ideal around kids. It's good with other animals, too, but shouldn't be left around aggressive animals because of its low self-defensibility.

The hair of the ragdoll is full and plush, requiring regular grooming, and although it is not as large as its coat would suggest, it is, nonetheless, one of the bigger cat breeds. This is a placid cat that really is satisfied with a relaxing lifestyle.

Generally, they weight between 10 and 15 pounds, but large males can easily get up to 20 pounds, so if you're looking for a smaller pet, bear that in mind.

More: Now We Know Why Cats Really Have Whiskers

6. The Siamese

Siamese cat
Image: praline3001/Flickr

Don't let the bad kitties in the film The Aristocats leave you with a bad image of this beauty. Yes, they can be verbally demanding in wanting attention, but they're also very loving, social and affectionate cats. The Siamese can be sensitive and nervous and is a creature of habit and routine — so if you're an international jet-setter who needs a cat that can travel (or plan to become one during it's 11- to 15-year lifespan), this is probably not the one for you. That said, their playfulness does make them only slightly less kid- and pet-friendly than the cats above it on the list.

The Siamese comes in a number of colors, but the points — the dark patches on the face, ears, paws and tail — are integral to the breed.

 7. The Abyssinian

Abyssinian cat
Image: Carl/Flickr

One of the oldest breeds of cat, the Abyssinian resembles an ancient Egyptian cat with its lithe build, large pointy ears, and slender legs. One of the smaller cats on this list, this fur baby only weighs in at an average of 6 to 10 pounds.

This is a wilful, smart and extroverted cat that loves to explore and play. Its love of games is only matched by its love of water, so watch out for unsolicited bath partners in the tub! Despite its curious nature, the Abyssinian is generally shy and timid around strangers, though it's a good family pet and works well with cat-friendly pups. If you are in search of a show cat, this breed is probably not the best choice. The Aby is most comfortable in a home environment that best suits its loyal and people-loving nature.

Next Up: The exotic shorthair

{pageBreak}

8. The exotic shorthair

Exotic shorthair cat
Image: Bryant Wong/Flickr

This is the short-haired version of the Persian. With its squashed face and rounded ears, the exotic shorthair looks more like a cuddly teddy bear than a cat. While having a similar temperament to its long-haired cousin, this cat is a bit more lively and inquisitive, but can still be very calm and laid back. The exotic shorthair is a great choice for someone who wants a Persian but doesn't have the time or desire to devote to grooming.

A word to the wise: These kitties may look a bit too teddy bear-like for young children to be around. They're not terrible with kids or other pets, but they don't fall into the excellent category, either.

9. The Maine coon

Maine coon cat
Image: Jorbasa Fotografie/Flickr

This beautiful cat is a native to Maine and also the largest of the domestic cat breeds at an average size of up to 18 pounds, though some have tipped the scales at as much as a healthy 20. It looks very feline and takes three to four years to reach full physical maturity. It has very thick fur with a waterproof layer, large wide paws that act like snow shoes for walking easily across snow and a long, thick tail used to wrap about its face during harsh weather. The Maine coon is not only a popular breed because of its temperament, but it's also a great mouser. Plus, it's also healthy and hardy, and is great with kids and other animal, including dogs.

More: 9 of Your Most Pressing Cat Health Questions Answered

10. The Persian

Persian cat
Image: stratman² (2 many pix!)/Flickr

Everyone knows the Persian cat. Renowned for its long, silky fur, expressive eyes and squashed face, the Persian is also one of the oldest cat breeds. Calm and sweetly affectionate, this cat loves habit and serene environments (which means it's probably not the best kitty for families with small children or pets). Persians are the quintessential indoor cats; it is best to keep this breed exclusively indoors. The Persian does require regular baths and daily grooming, as its fur is too long for it to self-groom thoroughly and it is prone to matting. For Persian fanciers, grooming is but one of the many pleasures of having this cat as a companion.

So there you have the top 10 cat breeds. Of course, please don't share any of this information with your cat. It probably thinks it is most special cat in the world and the only one worth talking about. But, isn't that all of them?

Related information

For more pet health information, visit PetMD.com. Don't forget to visit PetMD's user-friendly Topic Centers.

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

16 Quiet dog breeds so you can have some peace and quiet
Image: Elliot Freeman/Flickr

3-D Printing Could Help Make Sex Ed More Accessible to Blind Students

0
0

A team of researchers led a project that developed over 18 3-D figures that model sex organs. The hope is that while some may deem the models NSFW, they would be the most productive way to teach sex education to blind students.

Currently, those who are visually impaired rely on either verbal descriptions or raised 2-D tactile pictures as a way to learn about sex ed. For many, these methods open up a gap in information that has yet to be appropriately filled.

More: New videos take the awkward out of sex ed

“That approach does a blind student no good whatsoever because they, of course, cannot see the pictures and videos.” said Dr. Gaylen Kapperman, a professor at Northern Illinois University who was involved with the project to Mashable.

The researchers hope is that school districts will begin investing in the 3-D printing equipment that will ultimately make these models increasingly accessible to teachers crafting lesson plans for classrooms that include blind students.

More: Pornhub Launches New Sex Ed Site

This would be an especially noteworthy move toward inclusivity because as it stands, many visually impaired students attend school with the nonvisually impaired and are at a disadvantage as a result.

According to Mashable, the prototypes of the sex organs will be tested by students by the end of 2017.

By Vivian Nunez

Originally published on HelloFlo.

Regis Philbin and Kelly Ripa Have Been Secretly Feuding For Years

0
0

Who would win in a fight: Kelly Ripa or Regis Philbin? Ripa is a lot younger, but Philbin looks pretty wily. Don't put anything past him.

More: Rumor Has it That Kelly Ripa Will Have Some Big On-Air Competition This Summer

Anyway, it's probably not likely that Philbin and Ripa will ever get in an actual, physical catfight, but don't write it off completely — Philbin just revealed that they've been quietly hating on each other for the better part of a decade.

During an interview on Larry King Now, Philbin dropped the bombshell that Ripa has refused to even speak to him since he quit Live! in 2011. Apparently, she was "very offended" that he was leaving the show, even though he did it for reasons that had nothing to do with her (and left Live! in her incredibly capable hands).

"She got very offended when I left. She thought I was leaving because of her," Philbin explained. "I was leaving because I was getting older and it was not right for me anymore."

More: Kelly Ripa Aaved Andy Cohen From a Scary Close Call with Skin Cancer

He added, "Yeah, I think so," when asked if he thought Ripa took it personally that he moved on from Live!, which is kind of also what she did when Michael Strahan left the show, so maybe there's a theme here.

King then asked Philbin if he and Ripa have kept in touch since he left the show six years ago, and he answered, "Not really, no."

Apparently, 85-year-old TV veteran Philbin is a little miffed that he's never been asked to guest co-host, even as Ripa has hosted a revolving door of guests since Strahan's departure last year.

"Never once did they ask me to go back [on the show]," he said.

More: Kelly Ripa's Life in 2016 is Even Exhausting to Recap

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

Kelly Ripa slideshow
Image: WENN

Ashton Kutcher Is Fighting Child Slavery and Sex Trafficking

0
0

You think "Ashton Kutcher," and you might think That '70s Show, or Punk'd.

Well, he's got a new day job, and he's not punking us now.

Ashton Kutcher spoke to the Senate Foreign Relations Committee on Wednesday about his work fighting child exploitation and human trafficking — as well as being a father of two (with wife Mila Kunis). He appeared before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee as a representative of Thorn, an organization he co-founded to create anti-trafficking software and strategies.

More: Did Ashton Kutcher reveal his baby's gender?

Thorn's website describes the work they do.

"We partner across the tech industry, government and NGOs and leverage technology to combat predatory behavior, rescue victims, and protect vulnerable children."

Kutcher is no silent partner in this important work. He speaks extensively with sex-trafficking victims in the U.S. and around the globe and also hunts down exploitive material shared on the dark web, which is then handed over to authorities.

In his emotional, powerful testimony, he explained to the committee, "I'm here today to defend the right to pursue happiness. But the right to pursue happiness for so many is stripped away. It's raped, it's abused, it's taken by force, fraud or coercion... It's sold for the momentary happiness of another."

The video of his testimony is below, and it's worth watching.

ashton kutcher CSPAN

ashton kutcher CSPAN

With its anti-trafficking software Spotlight, Thorn has helped to identify 6,000 trafficking victims in just six months. Two thousand of these victims were minors. According to Kutcher, Spotlight is making a massive difference. Investigation times of these cases have decreased by 60 percent across the 900 law enforcement agencies using the software.

More: Ashton Kutcher believes in equal pay

But Kutcher believes it's not enough, not even close.

"Technology can be used to enable slavery, but technology can also be used to disable slavery," he said.

We wish more celebs would use their voices to speak out for causes they believe in — especially one as devastating as this.

Want to learn more about Thorn? Check out the website, where there's a link if you're interested in volunteering: wearethorn.org.

My Boss Is a Bully and He Wants Me Gone

0
0

Question:

I’m scared I’m going to lose my job. My coworkers and I work for a bully boss. He insults us constantly. When he’s upset, he yells things like “who’s going to pay for this!” and we all put our heads down and hope we’re not the one he picks on. After weeks in which I went home in tears nightly, I went to Human Resources to get help.

The HR officer listened and I thought she’d help. Instead, she told my boss everything I’d said. Isn’t HR supposed to keep confidential what we tell them?

Now my boss is out to get rid of me. Twice in the last week my boss has written me up for minor infractions. Neither write-up was fair but I don’t have the documentation to disprove I didn’t make the errors. What also burns me is that others do the exact same thing he accused me of, so why did I get written up? I’m being singled out — isn’t that against the law?

What do I do?

Answer:

Once you land in a bully’s sights, you’re often on your own.

Some HR officers keep what employees targeted by bullying say confidential. Some pull the bully manager aside and arrange for his coaching or discipline. Some give targeted employees coaching. And some HR officers do what yours did, and tell your manager your concerns, potentially thinking the manager will hear them and improve. Unfortunately, if your manager is a true bully, he’ll retaliate.

More: My Supervisor and Coworker Put Me in The Middle of Their Drama

The laws that safeguard you help you if you and the problem situation fall into certain categories. The federal Equal Opportunity Employment Commission and its state and local counterparts protect employees being discriminated against because of their age, sex, race, national origin, or other protected categories. The federal Occupational Safety and Health Commission and its state counterparts enforce workplace health and safety laws and protected those targeted because they protested safety violations. The federal Department of Labor and its state counterparts enforce minimum wage and overtime laws. The federal National Labor Relations Board and its state counterparts enforce laws protecting an employee’s rights to collectively bargaining laws or act in concert with their fellow employees. In some cases, employee policies or collective bargaining agreements cover bullying, possibly creating contractual protection. Finally, if you work in a state in which Courts enforce the covenant of good faith and fair dealing, you can allege unfair treatment and sue.

I wrote Beating the Workplace Bully to provide employees targeted by bullying strategies. Here are several. Don’t let a bully create an outpost in your mind. When he shouts insults, they say a lot about him, but little about you. Mentally detox yourself nightly by leaving the bully at work and not letting your situation encroach into your evening. Document exactly what’s happening, so if your boss makes up unfair allegations, he’ll lose if he fires you and you sue for wrongful discharge. And never, ever, let your boss know he’s getting to you. Like sharks, bullies go after blood.

More: My Old Boss Is Giving Me A Negative Reference

I’ll also say that bullying saps your emotional and mental energy until you’re flattened. If you’re crying nightly, that may be close and your best option may be to vote with your feet. Never let a bully win and sometimes that means you have to leave if you work for a company that allows bullies to romp over employees.

© 2017, Lynne Curry. If you'd like an answer to your career question, it's easy. Write lynne@thegrowthcompany.com. Lynne authored Beating the Workplace Bully (AMACOM, 2016) and Solutions. You can also follow Lynne@lynnecurry10 on twitter or access her other posts on SheKnows, www.workplacecoachblog.com or www.bullywhisperer.com.

Over Lululemon? Believe It or Not, There Are Better Yoga Apparel Brands

0
0

Hey y'all! We're here to say, "We're so over Lululemon," and we don't care who knows it! That's right, the yoga brand is not the be-all and end-all when it comes to cute workout clothing.

I mean, who wants to shell out hundreds of dollars for a company that is down to body shame and make you pay out the wazoo for a pair of see-through pants? Sure, Lulu still has some cute stuff, but we also thought Ed Hardy and Affliction were some pretty sweet threads about 15 years ago.

And did we mention a pair of their leggings that came out last fall will run you a cool $298? Um, no thanks.

More: These Couples Yoga Poses for Beginners Help Strengthen Your Relationship

We're not saying you should throw out that $100 pair of yoga pants you've got chillin' in your closet, but you should open yourself up to some of these other brands that are pretty impressive.

Image: Tiffany Egbert/SheKnows

1. Kira Grace

YogaClothes
Image: KiraGrace

I bless the day I discovered Kira Grace. Their clothing is simple, but oh so beautiful. The fabric they use is thin enough for hot yoga, but also stands up to pounding it gets from running. The fits are flattering and the tops are supportive. I can't say enough about this brand. The above leggings are $98, which is steep, true. But the quality is high and the price point is similar to Lulu and what you get feels like a whole lot more. These are outfits you truly want to wear to coffee after yoga is done.

2. Om Shanti

YogaPants
Image: OmShanti

Om Shanti is really just for yoga. If you want clothing that also will take you on runs and through a spin class or two, this is probably not the brand. But what they lack in versatility, they make up for in style. And how. These pants have flair for days. My two pairs of these pants get more attention than any other pants I own. They are beautifully cut and their weight, while not versatile, really is perfect for hot yoga — and since I take at least one class daily, that makes them perfect for me. The above pants are $75, but they also have crops that run about $70 and loose fitting tank tops and other great clothing to help bring out the inner yogini.

More: The Five Tibetan Rites Are Yoga Poses You'll Want in Your Anti-aging Arsenal

3. Onzie

YogaPants
Image: Onzie

This company makes absolutely stunning sports bras with fancy backs that would make any one want to try out a backless top. But they also make perfect leggings for hot yoga that manage to be both effortlessly comfortable as well as highly stylish. I get compliments on my Onzie pants all the time. The skull print, in particular, has been a big hit.

4. YogaSmoga

yoga top
Image: YogaSmoga

Before YogaSmoga, I mostly wore yoga tops with built in shelf bras. These are fantastic for running as well. But what I loved about the tanks I got from YogaSmoga is the fact that they worked almost entirely for yoga. They have tight bottoms that stay put when you invert, but they have loose middles that feel flowing and cool in hot yoga. I also like the open backs that show off pretty sports bras. It's a win all around!

5. Montiel Activewear

Montiel
Image: Montiel

Simple yoga clothing that feels good on, moves with the body, and makes you look hot, too? Yes, please! The pants featured here (Lea Leggings in lilac grey, $74) are incredibly comfortable and also lift and firm the butt in ways I never knew possible. Their comfy tops and sports bras round out the look and their simple covers are effortless and incredibly stylish. Plus they are less expensive than Lulu.

6. Liquido

Liquido

Image: Liquido

These leggings feel sturdy, which makes them perfect for both running and yoga. They also have a great length, as in, no bagging at the ankles, but they are not crops, either. They have tons of fun patterns and at $89 feel like a little bit of a saving. Liquido also has great tanks, some with writing, that will make you feel perfectly yogic, indeed.

7. Vimmia

Vimmia
Image: Vimmia

These leggings are as versatile and as high quality as anything Lululemon puts out. If you are looking for an all-around great legging, look no further. Their capris seem pricey at $92, but they really seem like they will last a few years and will carry you through hard cardio, hot yoga and more. The only issue I see is that they tend to get hot, which is why I would choose the capris over the long leggings for a heated vinyasa class.

More: Lady Gaga Turns to Gyrotonic Workout to Soothe Chronic Muscle Pain

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

30 Yoga poses you don't need an expensive studio to teach you

Originally published March 2016. Updated February 2017.


These Heart-Pumping Apps Give You an Amazing Workout — for Free

0
0

If you're still on the fence about signing up for a gym membership, we've got at least six good reasons why you shouldn't. Yes, you heard us right — these six amazing apps can give you a kick-ass workout in the comfort of your own home. Did we mention most of them are super-cheap or even free?

1. Fitness Blender Workouts

Fitness Blender app
Image: iTunes

Kelli and Daniel of Fitness Blender are seriously the shizz when it comes to at-home workouts. They offer tons of free YouTube videos — from HIIT to low-impact cardio to strength training and even some yoga — all of which are available on their handy-dandy app.

The app also has a huge community of users that you can connect with for added support. Everybody involved with Fitness Blender is super-positive. It's a great team to be part of.

The Fitness Blender Workouts app is available on iTunes and on Google Play for Android.

Users say: "There are hundreds of great workout videos on this app - all free. I do workout check-ins to help motivate myself to actually do my owrkout [sic] and there are so many before and after pictures on here, seeing everyone else's progress is motivation as well. Tons of recipe ideas from eery corer [sic] of the world, helps me make healthier food choices myself. I love love love this app!"

Price: Free

1. Total Couch to 5K

Couch to 5K
Image: Microsoft

Who needs a running coach when you have your own pocket trainer? With the Couch to 5K app you have access to a complete nine-week running plan that will get you prepped and ready for your first 5K. You can use the app to map your runs, share your progress through social media and track your times. Stats are available for estimated calorie burn and projected 5K times based on your daily training. One of the best features is that the app is supplemented by audio or voice cues that actually talk you through each run.

Users say: "I use this app for speed training. I highly recommend this if you are a beginner. I started running by doing walk/jog intervals. Before I knew it I could jog a mile which grew into three miles. In October I ran my first 10k without walking!"

Price: $2.99

More: Lady Gaga Turns to Gyrotonic Workout to Soothe Chronic Muscle Pain

2. 7 Minute Workout

7 minute workout
Image: Microsoft

In the world of quickie trainer apps, 7 Minute Workout is kind of a big deal, with literally hundreds of user reviews to back it. Just as the name suggests, the app focuses on improving fitness in as little as seven minutes a day. The 7 Minute Workout has been featured in The New York Times and the American College of Sports Medicine’s Health & Fitness Journal. Each seven-minute “intense training” set is designed to get your heart pumping using only your body weight and a chair. This makes the short power-burst workout (recommended to perform in three sets total) ideal for almost anyone who doesn’t have the time or the money to hit the gym. It's available on iTunes and Google Play.

Users say: "I used this app to change up my routine. The commands, timing and built in how-to videos were so helpful to keep me on track, motivated and using proper form and technique!"

Price: Free

Next Up: Tabata FREE

Originally published March 2013. Updated February 2017.

{pageBreak}

3. Tabata FREE

Tabata app
Image: Microsoft

Tabata workouts are a hot trend, and why wouldn't they be? A four-minute workout that's as effective as it is fast is like the Holy Grail of fitness. The trick to mastering a true Tabata routine is to properly manage time. With eight rounds of exercise alternating between 20 seconds of all-out effort followed by 10 seconds of rest, you have to have the right timer. Tabata FREE is your solution. Pre-programmed to time your Tabata intervals, you'll never have to worry about watching a clock or resetting your timer. It truly makes Tabata effortless... except for the whole exercise part. Available on iTunes and Google Play.

Users say: "Does exactly what you need it to. I love the way it uses different colors for rest/work cycles. Only wish you could personalize the sounds."

Price: Free

More: These Couples Yoga Poses for Beginners Help Strengthen Your Relationship

4. Yoga-pedia

Yoga-pedia app
Image: Microsoft

When you can't make it to the yoga studio or if you just want to learn the basics without the pressure of wandering eyes in class, this app provides tutorials for almost 100 poses and mudras. The basic moves are explained and accompanied by photos, and you can also access a daily audio lesson for the "pose of the day." If you're new to yoga and need a little more help sorting through all the options, there's a Find a Pose feature that allows you to sort poses by common need, like poses that help increase energy or poses that aid in weight loss. Available on iTunes, Google Play, Amazon and Microsoft.

Users say: "As a beginner yoga student, I like having an easy, handy guide to remind me how the poses I learned in class worked."

Price: Free

Next Up: Six Week Training

{pageBreak}

5. Six Week Training

Six week training
Image: Microsoft

Wow your friends and family by cranking out 100 pushups or killing 200 squats. Sound impossible? Not with the Six Week Training app. Rated almost five stars with more than 500 reviews, you know this app delivers the goods. Just choose your challenge, perform an initial test and start the program geared to your fitness level. To make it easy on you, the app allows you to schedule workout reminders, charting your results to keep you on track to meet your goal. After weeks two, four and five, you can choose to take a periodic progress test to ensure that you're always training at the appropriate level. Available on Microsoft.

Users say: "I really like the design and features of the app. Pick a single exercise or do quick rotations with SuperSet. Great way to get started on a workout plan, especially with the built in reminder settings."

Price: Free

More: Yoga Brands That Are Totally Better Than Lululemon

Bonus: 3 best apps for nutrition

  • My Fitness Pal: With a database of thousands of foods, My Fitness Pal is perfect for helping you make smart food decisions when at home or at a restaurant.
  • Food Diary: If you bite it, you write it! Use the Food Diary app to track your food intake.
  • In Season: Always choose the freshest, most nutrient-dense produce by shopping with In Season. You'll never wonder whether rhubarb is a summer or winter vegetable again.
Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

30 Yoga poses you don't need an expensive studio to teach you

Meghan Markle Shares Self-Love Manifesto While Visiting Kensington Palace

0
0

Every morning Meghan Markle looks into the same gold inlay mirror that Queen Victoria once gazed into and says, “I is smart. I is kind. I is important.” Wrong story... just kidding. What she actually says is: 

“Today, and all days, I love myself. I love my career as an actress and whatever led me to dating a prince. The queen loves me. Kate loves me. Harry loves me. But most important, I love me. I love that my lifestyle website is almost as successful as Goop in page views, and I love me. Sending good vibes — always in all the ways #NoBadEnergy #BeTheChange.” And then she bites down on a leather strap once worn as a bridle on a prize-winning pony while someone gives her a diamond colonic.

Not really — except the part about good vibes, which was what Markle tweeted on the 12th, a prequel of her upcoming Valentine's post on her website TheTig. The tweet was accompanied by a photo of what we can only assume are her feet wearing cat loafers, with the aforementioned hashtags scrawled on a sidewalk, which is indicative of the curious case of Meghan Markle — a woman who starred on a semi-cult hit show that ended four years ago, Fringe, and is now on a popular but still pulp lawyer show on USA, Suits, and then landed England’s Prince Harry, but is somehow still maintaining a very American tone and attitude toward blogging.

More: Meghan Markle Makes a Princess-Worthy Instagram Return

Lifestyle websites are serious business, though, so it’s no surprise that she continues to take hers seriously. What is surprising, though, is that she’s still appealing to readers as a girl-next-door type — when in reality the only people she’s been next door to recently are tourists trying to get a glimpse of Kensington Palace, where she and Prince Harry spent whatever is the royal version of a low-key V-day night in. But however unrealistic it is for Markle to be shilling dating advice to women sitting at home with boxed wine and takeout, her message is still pretty powerful.

Even though Markle was in her own version of The Prince and Me, the post she personally blogged out to readers was “a little Valentine’s reminder from 2015.” The post, which really did appear from the actress two years ago, proudly declares that “you need to be your own valentine.” She writes about how Valentine’s Day is a Hallmark holiday that shouldn’t be a reason to feel bad about ourselves. She cutely explains, “Where couples are cuddled up, and singletons see their requisite froyo as a cup of lonely. But it doesn’t have to be.” 

More: Meghan Markle & Prince Harry like the simple things in life

She goes on to tell an anecdote of her sisterhood with fellow “Suits sisterwives” Gina Torres and Sarah Rafferty, in which one of them stopped her from getting down on herself by saying, “Hey that’s my friend you’re talking about. Be nice to her,” (which is actually a Sex and the City quote, but I can’t expect everyone to have my unhealthy SATC knowledge). She goes on with what could also easily be a Carrie voice-over on SATC, “This Valentine’s Day I will be with friends, running amok through the streets of New York, likely imbibing some cocktail that’s oddly pink, and jumping over icy mounds in my new shoes through the salted snowy streets of the West Village.” She doesn’t forget to add with a Beyoncé flair that she bought those shoes for herself, and no woman should have to wait for a man to buy themselves anything.

Ultimately, Markle’s life before and after Harry is still a far cry from the average American woman's. And it can’t go unmentioned that while her post is intended to be motivational and positive, it is still blissfully ignorant of women who aren’t at least operating on some level of privilege — but hey, A for effort. Regardless, Markle is illustrating a key lesson for all of us both in her 2015 post and how things are turning out for her now: Life is better when we practice self-love. In fact, studies show that happy people are more attractive, and if anything is a route to real happiness, it’s making time to appreciate and take care of yourself. So thanks, Meghan, for smiling down on us little people from the palace and for not forgetting where you came from two years ago — bar-hopping in the West Village in new Manolos. No, but really, thanks for the advice. I’m going to grab my crystals and go take a bubble bath now #SelfCare.

More: Prince Harry & Meghan Markle Will Reportedly Make a Big Move at Pippa's Wedding

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

Prince Harry

Image: WENN

How to Create a Space That Makes Work-Life Balance Easy

0
0

As a full-time professional who works from home, creating a space where I enjoy being yet can be really productive is no easy task. I want my work area to be pretty and cozy, but I also want it to feel different from the rest of my house so I instantly switch into work mode when I sit down at my desk. Working from home is pretty common now, and corporate office spaces are more modern and casual and less traditional than they've ever been — so how can we make any space function well for both our personal and professional lives?

More: 7 ways to make yourself actually work in your home office

Interior designer James Tabb of Laurel & Wolf gave me examples of how he helped artist Carly Kuhn and food blogger Joy Wilson create functional, fashionable work spaces in their homes. Take a closer look at how he achieved the work-life balance below, then check out our slideshow with lots of home office inspiration.

1. Work-life artists loft in West Hollywood, California

Artist's Loft Work Space
Image: Laurel & Wolf

Artist Carly Kuhn needed a space that would allow her to focus on her art and have more room for inspiration. "When you're working from home and the organization isn't right, it ends up clogging your creative process," she says. "I'm of a generation that does everything on a screen — dating, ordering food, finding a handyman — so it made sense to me to design my home that way too."

Work life artists dining room
Image: Laurel & Wolf

The result: a gallery-like space drawing inspiration from Kuhn's monochromatic pieces and bringing color in with California-inspired plants, including cacti, other succulents and a banana leaf tree. Kuhn is now free of distractions and has more room — both literally and figuratively — for inspiration.

More: Create a calming workstation

2. A food blogger's bakeshop in New Orleans, Louisiana

Joy the Baker's Kitchen
Image: Laurel & Wolf

When baker, blogger and cookbook author Joy Wilson bought her house in New Orleans, she knew she wanted to incorporate a place for her to test recipes, teach classes and entertain. But filling that much space proved to be overwhelming. "I've lived such a food-focused life that I've let my design style get away from me," she says. "I know things that I like, but I don't know how to put them together."

"Joy's style is all over the place in the best possible way," Tabb says. "You can tell she's traveled a lot, and she's collected so many beautiful things. So I wanted to blend those objects with textures, patterns and colors that fit how bright, warm and fun she is."

Joy the Baker Dining Room
Image: Laurel & Wolf

Joy's thrilled with the results, which are both functional and beautiful. "I finally have the confidence and excitement to welcome people into my home. I can't wait to have people over!" she says.

Want more inspiration for striking the perfect work-life balance in your home or office? Check out the slideshow full of ideas below.

More: Pinterest's New Tools Make Decorating Your Home Easier — and More Addictive

20 Home Offices That Strike a Work-Life Balance
Image: My Full House

YouTube Star PewDiePie Turns Out to Be a Horrible Racist

0
0

Fifty-three million subscribers.

That’s the reach of YouTube star PewDiePie — AKA 27-year-old Felix Kjellberg of Sweden, an online gamer (once? still?) adored by the Gen-Z crowd and fans referring to themselves as his "Bro Army."

You know who else adores PewDiePie? White supremacists.

This week, the Wall Street Journal reported on PewDiePie’s repeated anti-Semitic jokes and various other heinous offenses in his YouTube videos, including "hiring two dancers in Sri Lanka to hold up a sign saying ‘Death to all Jews,' segueing into different clips using a picture of Hitler, and doing the Nazi salute while a voice-over says ‘Sieg Heil.' He also paid a Jesus impersonator to say that ‘Hitler did nothing wrong.'"

The upshot? Disney’s Maker Studios cut all ties with the gamer, and YouTube dumped the second season of his streaming reality show.

Sadly, these moves are way overdue by Disney and YouTube. And we’d really like to know why.

This racist idiot has been high-profile media fodder for years. PewDiePie hid his vile views in the beginning — first presenting himself as a harmless clown, scoring legions of fans (and big compensation) for his over-the-top reactions as he unboxed novelty toys and played new video games sent to him by various companies. That harmless clowning turned to trolling, played off by PewDiePie as all-in-good-fun antics. Except we’ve never thought there was anything fun about rape jokes and slurs like “gay,” “autistic” and “retard.”

Yeah, we’re such snowflakes, right?

PewDiePie’s super-casual use of the N-word has been a massive red flag since the beginning of his incarnation as YouTube celeb seven years ago. And the N-word is just the tip of the massively problematic iceberg. He’s stated he can’t “see people” when they’re “too black” — and he’s gone so far as to say that “black things” scare him. Uh, seriously?

You know what scares us? This guy, and the damage he’s done to a lot of young minds obsessed with his YouTube fame and fortune. This guy and the others like him still on their way up, up, up.

PewDiePie's fans include millions of children, FYI. Not exactly the online role model most parents hope their kids will latch onto.

More: How racists love to respond to accusations

The evidence is stark — take a look for yourself. It won't be hard to find. In one video, PewDiePie went so far as to use an image of black SNL actress Leslie Jones to stand in for Harambe, the Cincinnati Zoo gorilla killed last year. (If the Nazi stuff wasn't enough to outrage you.)

Yeah, this guy is a real prince. But his ardent fans insist PewDiePie is just messing around.

And PewDiePie's maintaining that stance too. We're not really in the mood to give him any more airtime, but here's part of his response for reference:

"I make videos for my audience. I think of the content that I create as entertainment, and not a place for any serious political commentary. I know my audience understand that and that is why they come to my channel. Though this was not my intention, I understand that these jokes were ultimately offensive.

"As laughable as it is to believe that I might actually endorse these people, to anyone unsure on my standpoint regarding hate-based groups: No, I don’t support these people in any way."

Yeah, we're getting really tired of the whole "stop taking words so seriously" wave sweeping the country. How about you?

PewDiePie’s most shocking claim is perhaps that YouTube discriminates against him because he’s white — and that accusation has scored him thousands of white supremacist followers who love to watch someone with a massive platform argue that white dudes just can’t catch a break in our society.

And that message is sadly gaining serious ground.

“There has always been a strong feedback loop between public figures, broadcast media and social media activity,” said Anthony McCosker, who is an expert on social media at Swinburne University of Technology in Australia. “I think the current push toward nationalism, tapping into exclusionary and racist sentiment, is driven and emboldened by online activity.”

Twitter has been full of #PewDiePieIsOverParty tweets — some condemning PewDiePie, some from the white supremacist crowd defending him. But that old trope about there being no such thing as bad publicity is legit. PewDiePie's boycotters will barely make a dent in his amassed fortune (estimated to be over $15 million).

More: Online safety tips for kids

What can be done to prevent other PewDiePies from spreading their hate under coward shade of "lol jk" attitude? In the U.S., it turns out, maybe not enough. Satire, parody and comedy have always been protected under the First Amendment for good reason — but as Wired puts it: "[I]n a time of 'alternative facts,' satire becomes increasingly hard to identify."

What can you do as a parent? Take no shit, and allow no shit into your kids' brains. Pay attention. Sit down with your children and ask them for tours of their favorite online role models' sites. Many kids sense that something is off, but often can't find the words for it. Help them. Keep communication open. Talk with them about hate speech; help them to identify what's humor and what's not funny (and never will be). Discuss internet safety. Encourage them to question any online personality who's reaping benefits and fame from trolling and race-baiting and seriously questionable behavior.

And that unsubscribe button? Teach your kids to get real comfortable with clicking it the first time something in their gut tells them that what they're seeing might not be all that funny after all.

Women Don't Want More Sex — They Want Better Sex

0
0

While doctors and scientists continue to look for ways to jump-start women's sex drives — most recently in the form of a pill named Addyi, aka flibanserin — new research has revealed that more sex isn't necessarily what women even want. In a recent study, researchers at the University of Zurich found that the so-called “pink Viagra” isn’t quite as widely popular as anticipated: mostly because it promises more sex for women, and for many, that’s not necessarily their goal.

The study followed 159 Swiss women ages 18 to 73 and found that 61 percent of them were open to trying Addyi (which aims to help women with clinically low sex drives), but they were more motivated by increasing their satisfaction during sex rather than having more of it. This may be something you intuited based on your own life experience, but it's kinda nice to have science confirm it.

More: 5 Things You Need to Know About Addyi

This isn’t the first study that saw such results — last year, research published in JAMA Internal Medicine revealed that based on data from 6,000 women, taking flibanserin only resulted in “one-half of an additional sexually satisfying encounter per month.” (Isn't "one-half" of a sexual encounter unsatisfying by definition, though?!)

“This pill doesn't work because it's not addressing how women's arousal cycles work," says psychologist Antonia Hall, author of The Ultimate Guide to a Multi-Orgasmic Life. “Knowing what turns you on and how to express it to your partner works wonders. Fostering these turn ons will keep you in touch with that energy, and that in turn will make you feel aroused more often. Rarely is popping a pill the answer in life, and this is one of those times."

The upshot: Men may want a pill like Viagra that makes more frequent sex possible, but women really just want to have better sex, even if that means they're having less of it. I wouldn't say no if someone invented that pill.

More: Yes, Your Partner Can Go Down on You During Your Period

How to Raise a Highly Sensitive Child

0
0

I'm the mother of a sensitive child. He's gentle. He's compassionate. This pleases me greatly, because he makes part of my job (raising kind, thoughtful children) so easy. My boy, 9 years old, increasingly independent and not far from the first stirrings of puberty, is hardwired to care. I see this every day. He's a great friend. He's always the one to speak to the kid perched on the "lonely" bench in the school playground. He quickly picks up on other people's distress (adults as well as other kids) and he always wants to help.

More: Even Babies Can Show Signs of Depression and Anxiety

But raising a sensitive child can also be a challenge. Mine is prone to tears when he's frustrated or tired. He's even-tempered and poised most of the time, but occasionally has extremely intense emotional outbursts.

His sensitivity can impact his schoolwork (feeling like a failure over a challenging math problem) and his sleep (inability to switch off from what's happening in his immediate reality, like a cutting remark from a classmate or the world at large — President Trump has a lot to answer for right now). So while I don't want any part of his sweet, sweet soul to change, I am trying to figure out how I can help him manage his emotions to make his own life easier.

Experts agree that the most important thing is to resist the temptation to change a sensitive child. I need to give my son permission to be sensitive, which means letting him feel and cry and process his frustrations and anxieties rather than try to quash them. "No amount of 'tough love' or forcing a child to be different (i.e., less sensitive) will be helpful to them and such an approach could, in fact, be psychologically harmful," warns New York-based clinical psychologist Jephtha Tausig-Edwards (aka Dr. Jeph).

"What the sensitive child needs more than anything is to be surrounded by adults who can truly empathize with the experience of being assaulted by the world," says Vancouver-based child psychologist and parenting expert Dr. Vanessa Lapointe. "Once we see what this is really like for the sensitive child, we are inspired to move on the child's behalf — at times in ways that are swift and fierce — to change what we can about the offensiveness of the world. We can then begin to give the child opportunities and skills for adaptation and resilience."

For example, if you have a child who is highly sensitive when it comes to social exchanges and finds it difficult to greet people they don't know well, they may hide behind you. Rather than force the child to step forward and say "hello," "nice to meet you," (or whatever nicety expected in polite society), you can support your child by saying something like, "I am sure she is happy to see you — she just likes to have a bit of space."

Another natural instinct as a parent may be to jump in and make it better, taking action to change whatever is causing our child distress. But doing this can undermine their emotional experiences and their confidence in their own problem-solving abilities.

More: What You Need to Know About Giving Your Kid an Allowance

"It’s so much better to validate your child, letting them know that you see that he/she is upset, and it’s perfectly OK for them to feel that," says New York-based clinical psychotherapist Dana Carretta. "The message is usually passed down to our children that if we cannot change something, then it makes no sense to be upset about it. This is completely incorrect. Just because we can’t change something, it doesn't mean we're not allowed to experience the emotions that arise."

With my own son, I've learned that he's often reluctant to talk about what's upsetting him, so I need to persevere — without making him feel pressured. If something's clearly on his mind, I'll spend a few minutes encouraging him to open up to me, stressing that I want to understand how he feels and that nothing he tells me can be "bad." If this doesn't work, I'll leave him for a short while, and then check in on him again. It can take time (and all of my patience), but we get there in the end, and I know he's sharing with me because he's ready to and not because I've browbeaten him into it.

It's a fine line, but one that's worth walking. "Parental communication is so crucial," says Carretta. "Children lack the life experience to make sense of what they are experiencing, and noticing your child is aware of what's happening and explaining it to them will help them understand what it is they are feeling."

That's not the only fine line involved in parenting a sensitive child. "It’s a delicate balance between taking their needs into account and letting them experience real-world parameters and rules," admits Dr. Jeph. This might mean building in more time for transitions, while not letting "normal" discipline and structure slide. I don't want my son to feel that he's ever being punished for being highly sensitive, but at the same time, I have to hold him accountable to the same standards of behavior I hold his sister to.

It's important to teach all kids self-care, but perhaps even more so when a child is sensitive. "It’s easy to take on the emotions of others and want to help them, but sometimes that means dismissing our own feelings or putting what is in our best interest aside," says Carretta. "If this happens consistently, it leads to a depressed or angry teenager, mostly because they are so exhausted from taking care of the emotions of others."

Perhaps we as parents can learn and grow from this too. "Parents may not be aware of their own emotions when their child is expressing sensitivity," says Carretta. "This lack of awareness can result in invalidation or dismissiveness because many, many adults find it difficult to understand their own emotions." Carretta recommends a mindful parenting strategy to help parents recognize their own emotions before reacting to their child's. "A great tool to remember is the acronym STOP," she says. "If your child is displaying an intense emotion, you as the parent should: Stop, Take a breath, Observe inside of yourself what it is that you’re feeling/experiencing and then Plan what the best intervention/communication strategy would be."

More: Children's Books That Teach Diversity Are More Important Than Ever

These Pepperoni Pinwheels Are as Tasty as They Are Pretty

0
0

These pepperoni pinwheels may look tricky to create, but they're actually pretty simple. And even better — they taste delicious.

Pepperoni pinwheel recipe

Ingredients:

  • 1 box frozen puff pastry
  • 1 cup marinara sauce
  • 1 cup ricotta cheese
  • 40 HORMEL® Pepperoni slices
  • 1 egg
  • 1 teaspoon water

Directions:

  1. Preheat the oven to 450 degrees F.
  2. Thaw the puff pastry, then roll it out on a lightly floured surface.
  3. Cut one puff pastry sheet into 4 squares with a pizza cutter.
  4. Cut 2-inch lines down each side toward the center of the square.
  5. Place a tablespoon of ricotta in the center of the dough and spread it out.
  6. Place 1 tablespoon of marinara on the ricotta and spread it around.
  7. Place 5 pepperonis on the marinara and fold each corner to the center creating a smaller square.
  8. Take the same corner of each piece and fold it to the center creating your pinwheel.
  9. Place it on a parchment-lined rimmed baking sheet.
  10. Mix your egg and water to create an egg wash.
  11. Using a pastry brush, brush your pinwheels with the egg wash.
  12. Bake for 8 to 10 minutes or until golden-brown.

This post was sponsored by HORMEL® Pepperoni.

More recipes

Foods We'll All Be Obsessed With in 2017, According to Pinterest
15 Kids' Foods Adults Need to Reclaim
Quick Empanadas Your Kids Will Gladly Eat


Dr. Luke Mercilessly Shamed Kesha For Her Weight

0
0

Kesha may have dropped her California lawsuit accusing producer Dr. Luke of sexually assaulting her, but she's still fighting to "be free from her abuser and rebuild her physical, emotional, and mental health," according to papers filed by her attorney this week, begging a judge to release her from her contract with Sony so she can get away from Dr. Luke.

More: Judge Who Ruled Against Kesha Had a Huge Conflict of Interest with the Case

Along with those papers were copies of emails in which Dr. Luke and Kesha's manager, Monica Cornia, insulted her weight and alluded to the crazy diets they tried to force her to maintain. Dr. Luke wrote that songwriters were "reluctant to give Kesha their songs" because of her weight, and called her out for having some turkey when she was supposed to be on a liquid diet.

"There have been many times we have all witnessed her breaking her diet plan. This particular time — it happened to be diet coke and turkey while on an all juice fast," he wrote. Cornia shot back that Kesha is "a human and not a machine. If she were a machine that would be way cool and we could do whatever we want."

More: We May be Hearing Some New Music from Kesha a Lot Sooner Than Expected

Seriously? A juice fast is a dangerous and unhealthy way to lose weight. And while diet soda is far from healthy, criticizing Kesha for eating some turkey, which is a lean, healthy source of protein, is some real gaslighting behavior. And wishing that she were a robot so they could "do whatever [they] want?" That kind of creepy desire for control isn't helping Dr. Luke's case as he continues to deny that he physically, sexually and mentally abused Kesha.

Still, his lawyer responded, claiming that the emails were taken out of context.

"Kesha and her attorneys continue to mislead by refusing to disclose the larger record of evidence showing the bad faith of Kesha Sebert and her representatives, which is greatly damaging to them. It also shows the tremendous support that Dr. Luke provided Kesha regarding artistic and personal issues, including Kesha's own concerns over her weight," she wrote in a statement. ""Rather than agree to a thorough disclosure, Kesha and her representatives improperly publicized, without court permission, three out-of-context emails, which do not present the full picture regarding the events they concern. Dr. Luke looks forward to full vindication in court."

More: Kesha is Back, and This Time There is Really No Stopping Her

Before you go, check out our slideshow below:

celebs attacked slideshow
Image: Apega/WENN

Best Pregnancy Announcement Ever? We Think So

0
0

It seems like unique pregnancy announcements are all the rage lately. People are finding all kinds of hilarious and heartwarming ways to share their news with their friends and family (and quite possibly the world).

Amanda Diesen and Todd Krieg took a photo that quickly became viral, and it's easy to see why. Their photo might possibly be the best pregnancy announcement ever.

Reddit couple Imgur

Reddit couple Imgur

Diesen met Krieg at a paralysis recovery center in California in October 2015 while Krieg was recovering and rehabbing after a dirt bike crash that paralyzed him from the chest down. The pair fell for each other while spending time together there, and once Krieg finally admitted his feelings for his “cute therapist,” the two realized they were meant to be together.

More: Chelsea Houska's pregnancy announcement is absolutely perfect

And despite being told about the very low chances of ever getting pregnant, Diesen and Krieg knew they had something special when they found out just the opposite. “Doctors had said it would be nearly impossible to conceive naturally due to Todd's injury, but here we are, 14 weeks pregnant," Diesen said on Bride Live Wedding.

But hold on….the pregnancy announcement was only part of this memorable photo shoot. Krieg, who arranged the shoot, also proposed to Diesen on the exact same day. To say these two nailed it would be an understatement. Look out, parents-to-be in 2017. It looks like the bar has just been raised for pregnancy and engagement announcements.

More: Not everyone loves your "cute" pregnancy announcements

Constance Wu's New Movie Role Is Giving Everyone Hope for Hollywood

0
0

The fact that Hollywood tends to be less than diverse is far from a secret. The Oscars get called on it every year, when tons of pretty white people are up for awards and actors of color net only a handful of nominations. Movies get boycotted when they whitewash ethnic rolls — think Johnny Depp as Native American Tonto or Scarlett Johansson as Japanese Major Kusanagi.

More: Children's Books That Teach Diversity Are More Important Than Ever

That's why Constance Wu's upcoming film Crazy Rich Asians is so important — it's a film about Asian people set in Southeast Asia and featuring an all-Asian cast.

Constance Wu tweet Crazy Rich Asians

Constance Wu tweet Crazy Rich Asians

The film, directed by Jon M. Chu, is based on Kevin Kwan's best-selling 2013 novel of the same name. The book follows the intersecting lives of Asian families in Singapore, especially Rachel Chu — the lead role that just went to Wu — an American-born economics professor who travels from New York City to Singapore to attend a wedding with her boyfriend. Upon arriving, she learns that because of her boyfriend's insanely wealthy family, he's considered one of Singapore's most eligible bachelors. Her presence is met with the jealous antics of just about every woman she encounters in his hometown.

More: Matt Damon "Whitewashing" Accusations Point to a Bigger Hollywood Problem

Wu, whose breakout role was on ABC's Fresh Off the Boat, has been vocal about whitewashing in Hollywood. Her casting, and the fact that she's part of an all-Asian cast, has been met with extremely positive reactions.

Reactions to Crazy Rich Asians' all Asian cast 1

Reactions to Crazy Rich Asians' all Asian cast 1

Reactions to Crazy Rich Asians' all Asian cast 2

Reactions to Crazy Rich Asians' all Asian cast 2

Reactions to Crazy Rich Asians' all Asian cast 3

Reactions to Crazy Rich Asians' all Asian cast 3

Yep, it is real life, and it's a huge step forward for Hollywood.

More: One Model Used Gigi Hadid & Gisele Bündchen's Ads to Highlight a Diversity Problem

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

Aziz Ansari Emmy Awards
Image: WENN

Karla Souza On Being Mexican-American & Celebrating Her Immigrant Culture

0
0

I don't watch a lot of movies with subtitles. It's not that I don't like them, it's just that subtitles require focus and when I'm home watching a movie, I'm likely also working, Instagram stalking, cooking food, playing indoor fetch with my dog, Swiffering, texting or doing some other random activity like painting my nails (who am I kidding? I never paint my nails). You know, it's the whole girls-who-multitask thing.

When I was invited to interview How to Get Away with Murder's Karla Souza about her new film Everybody Loves Somebody, though, I was automatically in — even if it meant I was going to have to set aside two hours to just sit and watch the television screen.

I am so glad I did. Everybody Loves Somebody is an incredible film that perfectly presents the Mexican culture and language in a way that movie lovers from all walks of life will love. I'm not Mexican. I've never really been to Mexico. All I know is that I love their food and think the Mexican culture is beautiful. But this film explores what it means to be a woman, what it means to be a Mexican-American woman and what it means to be in love.

Check out what Karla Souza had to say about her new film Everybody Loves Somebody, representing Mexican-Americans in Hollywood and really embracing her roots.

SheKnows: I love that Everybody Loves Somebody is a bilingual film with both Spanish and English. I don’t think that we see many mainstream movies take the bilingual route. Do you think that’s something that should happen more often — like even Marvel films could have a character or two that speak a different language and have subtitles?

KS: Oh, for sure. It represents the world as it is, and I think that, you know, the more inclusive we are with that, the better the movies and the better the representation of us will be. I think it’s not an easy task because there’s not enough Latino writers that are being given opportunities to write things — and I say this because I’ve been given a lot of bilingual movies in the past because of my career in Mexico, and they’re like, “Oh, it’s going to make sense for her to do this.” A lot of studios want to hit that demographic, but they sort of do it without starting in the right way, which is having someone who knows the culture, and enjoys the language as well, to be able to write these things. I would get very frustrated reading scripts that were bilingual but maybe not bicultural. And this one really loves both cultures, represents them in a very accurate, genuine, authentic, fun, fresh way, and it includes so many more people because it has that language aspect to it. And I hope that we start trendsetting, you know, like having bigger movies also include that. Because I think it’ll definitely change a lot of what’s going on right now.

More: The 100's Lindsey Morgan on How All Girls Can Help Save the World IRL

SK: Absolutely. I really enjoyed it. I know I’ve said that three times, but I just haven’t seen a movie that’s done it that well. It so perfectly hits a variety of demographics that maybe wouldn’t necessarily both go see this movie, so I thought it was really genius. When you come across a situation like that, how empowered do you feel to let the “powers that be” know that they’re not hitting the culture aspect of it in the right way?

KS: Oh, very. I don’t only say I won’t do it, which is probably the biggest sort of action that I could take. People follow my movies for a reason, and that’s because I believe in them, and I don’t want to just make movies for the sake of making movies. I felt really strongly about this script because, like you said, it’s a very specific way of life. It’s a very specific tone, and romantic comedies, if done badly, can be catastrophic. I knew that [director/screenwriter] Catalina Aguilar Mastretta had an amazing take on the female psyche and the modern woman and the modern immigrant woman living in the U.S., and I really saw the need for a story told of our daily lives without being a statistic and without just trying to hit a demographic, and I felt that with this one.

What I do feel with the different scripts that they give me where I feel like this is done for one of those reasons, I share my point of view. I don’t just say, “No, thank you.” I say, “I feel that this represents Latinos in a wrong way, in a bad way.” I tell them I think it has too many stereotypes, that even the way they come in and out of Spanish doesn’t really make sense, it feels forced. I explain that as Latinos, we can also be professionals. In the movie, she’s a successful doctor that has diverse patients. And I also have to be careful of what it says about women. I get a lot of scripts that only talk about women’s appearances and what they look like. I think we’re tired of having to meet this standard and not being asked what our talents or abilities are. So I also really pay attention to whether the script embodies a full female character or if they’re just wanting a two-dimensional objectified woman. So I also have that aspect to take care of as well.

Karla Souza Quotes

SK: Well, amen to that! Now, in Everybody Loves Somebody [no spoilers!], there are some moments when your family puts the “when are you getting married” pressure on your character. And this is something that I think is prevalent in society — I’m 28 years old. I’ve been with my boyfriend for eight years, my mother asks me every other day when I’m getting married. How do you feel about the pressure put on women to get married?

KS: Oh, I bet! It’s funny because it’s put on by women and men. Society makes women feel like, oh, you’re getting old. The patriarchal society has made women believe, first of all, you’re only valid and valuable when you’re young. All the products that are sold to us — those anti-aging products — are telling us that there’s a due date. Wisdom and white hair might not be as valued as in different cultures. Our society really needs to take a better look at what we’re selling, because I think women being empowered will be as beneficial to men as it is to us. When we see society telling women that they have a certain time, that they make women compete with each other, the older generation competing with the younger generation. They’ve made us believe that there’s not enough men out there for us or that we’re only hired because of our looks and not because of our abilities.

There’s a lot of lies out there that we should catch and that have taken me a lot of time to sort of see, and reading up on it and getting educated on it. I’m reading right now a book that’s about how images of beauty have hurt women along the decades. It’s a very educating but infuriating thing to see, how we don’t have equal opportunity because they’re demanding so much more.

In the movie, the sister tells my character, “No, don’t you want to be with someone?” I think the family — especially in this movie — they know that the reason that Clara doesn’t want to have an emotional, intimate relationship is more because she was hurt so badly from heartbreak that she’s then being closed off and cynical. She’s seen all the ways that it doesn’t work, and all the reasons it doesn’t, so she’s become more and more cynical about finding someone she could be with for that long a time. It’s sort of like they’re encouraging her to open up again, but it does sound like they’re pressuring her, like society does. I think that, for sure, we as women should try and realize that it’s more about having someone to share.

Something I was adamant about was that the movie wouldn’t end with, oh, marriage saved her. They’re married and she’s OK. I was very pushing on having the ending be that she made an inner growth of healing so that she can then have the ability and the space to love and be loved by someone else, and that love is open-ended and doesn’t mean they’re going to get married tomorrow and all her problems are solved. She is in a forever-growing process. I feel the movie did that very well and not finishing off as “a woman’s life ends when she finds the right guy,” you know.

SK: Agreed, and I think that’s so great that you encouraged that, and you speak your voice when it comes to that. I spoke to a director last week and I told him his female character didn’t have the depth or the layers that the male characters did, and he said, “Yeah, I mean, I thought she was OK, but I guess I haven’t thought about her that much. Writing women roles is hard.”

KS: Wow.

SK: Yeah, and I told him to write female characters as if he’s writing male characters, and then just make it a woman. It doesn’t have to be that different.

KS: I told my friend — we were working on a movie together — and he gave me a script and asked me to give him notes. And they were all male characters, and I said, “You know what would make this character more interesting?” And he asked what — and it’s this road trip between three guys, basically, one older man, one 30-year-old and a 13-year-old mechanic. And I said, “If you make the 13-year-old a girl, and you make her an Indian-American mechanic.” And he said, “What do you mean?” And I said, “Yeah, don’t change anything in the script about him, and just make it a her.” And he flipped out — now of course he’s doing it. I should have asked for credit — but he has no idea how amazing it is that a character that was written as a boy can be equally written for a girl. It’s like you said, just write a character as if it were a man, and then turn it and make it into a woman. It’s like, we’re human beings, after all.

Karla Souza Quotes

SK: It’s amazing to me that concept is so difficult in Hollywood for people. You mentioned something you specifically look for when you’re reading scripts, specifically bilingual or having to do with Mexican culture, is that they really capture Mexican culture. What do you think is the most beautiful thing about your culture?

KS: Oh, my goodness. I love family. In this movie, my character is a successful OB-GYN and yet she goes back to her teenage years when she’s with her parents. Like, that’s me. I could be working as a professional, but she reverts to that family life, playing those games and those competitions and having that much fun with the family is something that I grew up with, and the Mexican culture has a lot of, you know — Sunday is the day you spend with your family, and you have 40 to 50 people at your house, the uncles and the cousins, and I grew up with that. I know that that’s a tradition that I want to keep alive and I also want to share. And I love that in this movie, you almost want to go and hang out with this family. That, and the music in the movie is very much hand-picked specifically because it’s our history and our traditions. The themes are universal. And also the food. Mexican food is one of the best culinary experiences that people can have. There’s a lot of things, even the landscape that we show in the movie of Ensenada in Baja is just spectacular. There’s so much more — I wish we could have shown more, but I’m glad we didn’t see the typical, you know, border-sombrero-tequila thing that we normally do. It was a different take on that immigrant sort of life.

More: Vogue's Attempt at Diversity Draws Major Backlash

SK: Are there one or two Spanish or bilingual films that had an impact on your life growing up?

KS: Sadly — and I think this is why it’s so important that we do this more — I don’t have that guiding light. You know, “Oh, that Sleepless in Seattle bilingual something,” like, it doesn’t exist. I don’t have it in my memory, and that’s why I thought it was important to make it. I don’t know if you remember, there was one called Women on Top or something.

SK: I don’t know if I’ve seen it.

KS: That was with Penelope Cruz, but I think, again, that was only in English. But there’s not one I really remember that really did it accurately. Yesterday, all my friends from the show How to Get Away with Murder, I did a screening for them at Four Seasons. And they were just so in love with the movie. They freakin’ loved it. And I was surprised to see that it translates, because even if they had to read subtitles at some points, they really connected to the story. So this movie is as much for the general market as it is for Latino audiences. That’s a really exciting prospect.

Karla Souza Quotes

SK: Absolutely. That’s exactly what I recognized when I watched it. I had no idea that it had subtitles, and at first I was like, “Oh man, I can’t work while I watch this movie because I’ve got to read the subtitles.” But I fell in love with it, and I thought it was done so well because it does hit so many different markets and resonates so well. I do want to ask, were you ever asked to downplay your diversity or your heritage when you were climbing up the Hollywood ladder?

KS: For sure. I even did it myself because I thought that I didn’t want to only be doing stereotyped jobs. When I was asked to change Laurel into a Latina for How to Get Away with Murder, I was terrified, because I thought, no one’s going to know how to do this because the American take on my culture is never accurate. Until they hired a Latina to write for Laurel, I was scared that she was going to fall into stereotypes. They promised me they wouldn’t do that sort of "defining nature of my character is that she’s Latina." It has nothing to do with that. She just happens to be a Latina. I think that, you know, that fear still comes from exactly what we’re talking about. There’s not enough of those inclusive projects where I feel like I’m interpreting a human being and not just a statistic or a nationality.

More: Lilly Singh on Silencing Self-Doubt, Influencing Fans and Loving "The Rock"

SK: And speaking of How to Get Away with Murder, what is the difference between how Shonda Rhimes writes women and other people?

KS: Well, I think, especially with this show, we have Viola Davis and Pete Nowalk as the showrunner. [Rhimes and Nowalk] have definitely, from the pilot, brought forth a woman who is unapologetically herself, unapologetically flawed, and is as vulnerable as she is powerful. I think we only seen men written in that way, and I think Shonda Rhimes came to change television for women forever. I’m grateful to be in that family.

SK: It’s a good family to be in. Last question: What kinds of real change do you feel most passionate about making in the world?

KS: I’ve been transformed by stories, and I think that storytelling is definitely sacred. I take it very seriously because my life has been changed, whether it was a movie, a play, a piece of writing, poetry, a painting. I feel that the power that storytelling has to change people, to bring them together, to have that cathartic sort of experience, is something that definitely has helped my life be worthwhile and better. So I guess that it would be for me to keep making art that touches people in a way that nothing else can.

SK: Well, I think that this movie is phenomenal, and I want to thank you for doing it, and we hope that your career keeps skyrocketing. We’re huge fans and we’re on your side, so keep kicking ass.

Everybody Loves Somebody opens in theaters Friday, Feb. 17.

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

celebs minority quotes slideshow
Image: Brian To/WENN.com

Emma Watson Continues Her Crusade for Girl Power With iPad Advice

0
0

Emma Watson tried out a new way to connect with New York commuters this week by offering life advice for the awesome price of just $2.

More: All the Times Emma Watson Made Us Want to Do Better, Think Better, Be Better

Watson wasn't there in person, though. She had writer Derek Blasberg helping her out by setting up an iPad with Watson appearing via live video feed on a mobile stand that read, "Advice from Emma Watson $2."

If you could ask Watson anything for the low price of just $2 while on your way to work, what would you ask?

More: Kids Understand Emma Watson's #HeForShe Message — Do You? (VIDEO)

I'd probably want to know her advice for getting involved in women's philanthropic initiatives. Or I'd be feeling greedy that day, and I'd just want to know the secret of her success.

emma watson advice tweet 1

emma watson advice tweet 1

emma watson advice tweet 2

emma watson advice tweet 2

emma watson advice tweet 3

emma watson advice tweet 3

No word yet why, exactly, Watson was offering her advice, but the sessions were all filmed. And it's Watson, so let's just go ahead and assume that her iPad advice will be used for some inspiring project that we'll all end up feeling grateful to have experienced.

More: Emma Watson Draws Strength From Fellow Activists

People suggests the experiment could have something to do with Watson's upcoming film The Circle, which explores the dark side of our digital world.

It could also be that maybe Watson was just waiting for someone to say, "Show me the Beast," since her new movie Beauty and the Beast will be released March 17. An iPad could be like a modern vision of that cursed mirror in the movie, am I right?

Before you go, check out our slideshow below.

Celebs who give back
Image: WENN
Viewing all 33701 articles
Browse latest View live




Latest Images